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coveredhimself¡£godwasstillhisfriend£¡
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡hehimselfacpaniedthenewly¡marriedpairontheroadwhentheyleftthetown£»and£»afterwishingthemallthehappinesswhichwasdeniedtohim£»hereturnedwithresignationtotheoldhouseinthesuburb¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡itwastherethatheendedhislife£»forsakenbymen£»butnotashesaidbythefatherwhichisinheaven¡£hefelthispresenceeverywhere£»itwastohimintheplaceofallelse¡£whenhedied£»itwaswithasmile£»andlikeanexilesettingoutforhisowncountry¡£hewhohadconsoledhiminpovertyandill¡health£»whenhewassufferingfrominjusticeandforsakenbyall£»hadmadedeathagainandblessingtohim¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡eightoclock——allihavejustwrittenhaspainedme£¡tillnowihavelookedintolifeforinstructionhowtolive¡£isitthentruethathumanmaximsarenotalwayssufficient£¿thatbeyondgoodness£»prudence£»moderation£»humility£»self¡sacrificeitself£»thereisonegreattruth£»whichalonecanfacegreatmisfortunes£¿andthat£»ifmanhasneedofvirtuesforothers£»hehasneedofreligionforhimself£¿
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡when£»inyouth£»wedrinkourwinewithamerryheart£»asthescriptureexpressesit£»wethinkwearesufficientforourselves£»strong£»happy£»andbeloved£»webelieve£»likeajax£»weshallbeabletoescapeeverystorminspiteofthegods¡£butlaterinlife£»whenthebackisbowed£»whenhappinessprovesafadingflower£»andtheaffectionsgrowchill¡then£»infearofthevoidandthedarkness£»westretchoutourarms£»likethechildovertakenbynight£»andwecallforhelptohimwhoiseverywhere¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡iwasaskingthismorningwhythisgrowingconfusionalikeforsocietyandfortheindividual£¿invaindoeshumanreasonfromhourtohourlightsomenewtorchontheroadside£ºthenightcontinuestogroweverdarker£¡isitnotbecausewearecontenttowithdrawfartherandfartherfromgod£»thesunofspirits£¿
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡butwhatdothesehermitsreveriessignifytotheworld£¿theinwardturmoilsofmostmenarestifledbytheoutwardones£»lifedoesnotgivethemtimetoquestionthemselves¡£havetheytimetoknowwhattheyare£»andwhattheyshouldbe£»whosewholethoughtsareinthenextleaseorthelastpriceofstock£¿heavenisveryhigh£»andwisemenlookonlyattheearth¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡buti——poorsavageamidallthiscivilization£»whoseekneitherpowernorriches£»andwhohavefoundinmyownthoughtsthehomeandshelterofmyspirit——icangobackwithimpunitytotheserecollectionsofmychildhood£»and£»ifthisourgreatcitynolongerhonorsthenameofgodwithafestival£»iwillstrivestilltokeepthefeasttohiminmyheart¡£
¡¡CHAPTER¡¡VII
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡thepriceofpowerandtheworthoffame
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡sunday£»july1st¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡yesterdaythemonthdedicatedtojuno£¨junius£»june£©bytheromansended¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡to¡dayweenteronjuly¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡inancientromethislattermonthwascalledquintiles£¨thefifth£©£»becausetheyear£»whichwasthendividedintoonlytenparts£»beganinmarch¡£whennumapompiliusdivideditintotwelvemonthsthisnameofquintileswaspreserved£»aswellasthosethatfollowed——sexteles£»september£»october£»november£»december——althoughthesedesignationsdidnotaccordwiththenewlyarrangedorderofthemonths¡£atlast£»afteratimethemonthquintiles£»inwhichjuliuscaesarwasborn£»wascalledjulius£»whencewehavejuly¡£thusthisname£»placedinthecalendar£»isbeetheimperishablerecordofagreatman£»itisanimmortalepitaphontimeshighway£»engravedbytheadmirationofman¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡howmanysimilarinscriptionsarethere£¡seas£»continents£»mountains£»stars£»andmonuments£»haveallinsuccessionservedthesamepurpose£¡wehaveturnedthewholeworldintoagoldenbook£»likethatinwhichthestateofveniceusedtoenrollitsillustriousnamesanditsgreatdeeds¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡itseemsthatmankindfeelsanecessityforhonoringitselfinitselectones£»andthatitraisesitselfinitsowneyesbychoosingheroesfromamongitsownrace¡£thehumanfamilylovetopreservethememory£»oftheparvenusofglory£»aswecherishthatofagreatancestor£»orofabenefactor¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡infact£»thetalentsgrantedtoasingleindividualdonotbenefithimselfalone£»butaregiftstotheworld£»everyonesharesthem£»foreveryonesuffersorbenefitsbyhisactions¡£geniusisalighthouse£»meanttogivelightfromafar£»themanwhobearsitisbuttherockuponwhichthislighthouseisbuilt¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ilovetodwelluponthesethoughts£»theyexplaintomeinwhatconsistsouradmirationforglory¡£whengloryhasbenefitedmen£»thatadmirationisgratitude£»whenitisonlyremarkableinitself£»itistheprideofrace£»asmen£»welovetoimmortalizethemostshiningexamplesofhumanity¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡whoknowswhetherwedonotobeythesameinstinctinsubmittingtothehandofpower£¿apartfromtherequirementsofagradationofranks£»ortheconsequencesofaconquest£»themultitudedelighttosurroundtheirchiefswithprivileges——whetheritbethattheirvanitymakesthemthustoaggrandizeoneoftheirowncreations£»orwhethertheytrytoconcealthehumiliationofsubjectionbyexaggeratingtheimportanceofthosewhorulethem¡£theywishtohonorthemselvesthroughtheirmaster£»theyelevatehimontheirshouldersasonapedestal£»theysurroundhimwithahalooflight£»inorderthatsomeofitmaybereflecteduponthemselves¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡itisstillthefableofthedogwhocontentshimselfwiththechainandcollar£»sothattheyareofgold¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡thisservilevanityisnotlessnaturalorlessmonthanthevanityofdominion¡£whoeverfeelshimselfincapableofmand£»atleastdesirestoobeyapowerfulchief¡£serfshavebeenknowntoconsiderthemselvesdishonoredwhentheybecamethepropertyofamerecountafterhavingbeenthatofaprince£»andsaint¡simonmentionsavaletwhowouldonlywaituponmarquises¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡july7th£»sevenoclockp¡£m——ihavejustnowbeenuptheboulevards£»itwastheoperanight£»andtherewasacrowdofcarriagesintheruelepelletier¡£thefoot¡passengerswhowerestoppedatacrossingrecognizedthepersonsinsomeoftheseaswewentby£»andmentionedtheirnames£»theywerethoseofcelebratedorpowerfulmen£»thesuccessfulonesoftheday¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡nearmetherewasamanlookingonwithhollowcheeksandeagereyes£»whosethinblackcoatwasthreadbare¡£hefollowedwithenviouslooksthesepossessorsoftheprivilegesofpoweroroffame£»andireadonhislips£»whichcurledwithabittersmile£»allthatpassedinhismind¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¨lookatthem£»theluckyfellows£¡¡¨thoughthe£»¡¨allthepleasuresofwealth£»alltheenjoymentsofpride£»aretheirs¡£theirnamesarerenowned£»alltheirwishesfulfilled£»theyarethesovereignsoftheworld£»eitherbytheirintellectortheirpower£»andwhilei£»poorandunknown£»toilpainfullyalongtheroadbelow£»theywingtheirwayoverthemountain¡topsgildedbythebroadsunshineofprosperity¡£¡¨
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ihaveehomeindeepthought¡£isittruethattherearetheseinequalities£»idonotsayinthefortunes£»butinthehappinessofmen£¿
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡dogeniusandauthorityreallywearlifeasacrown£»whilethegreaterpartofmankindreceiveitasayoke£¿isthedifferenceofrankbutadifferentuseofmensdispositionsandtalents£»orarealinequalityintheirdestinies£¿asolemnquestion£»asitregardstheverificationofgodsimpartiality¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡july8th£»noon——iwentthismorningtocalluponafriendfromthesameprovinceasmyself£»whoisthefirstusher¡in¡waitingtooneofourministers¡£itookhimsomelettersfromhisfamily£»leftforhimbyatravellerjustefrombrittany¡£hewishedmetostay¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¨to¡day£»¡¨saidhe£»¡¨theministergivesnoaudience£ºhetakesadayofrestwithhisfamily¡£hisyoungersistersarearrived£»hewilltakethemthismorningtost¡£cloud£»andintheeveninghehasinvitedhisfriendstoaprivateball¡£ishallbedismisseddirectlyfortherestoftheday¡£wecandinetogether£»readthenewswhileyouarewaitingforme¡£¡¨
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡isatdownatatablecoveredwithnewspapers£»allofwhichilookedoverbyturns¡£mostofthemcontainedseverecriticismsonthelastpoliticalactsoftheminister£»someofthemaddedsuspicionsastothehonoroftheministerhimself¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡justasihadfinishedreading£»asecretarycameforthemtotakethemtohismaster¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡hewasthenabouttoreadtheseaccusations£»tosuffersilentlytheabuseofallthosetongueswhichwereholdinghimuptoindignationortoscorn£¡liketheromanvictorinhistriumph£»hehadtoenduretheinsultsofhimwhofollowedhiscar£»relatingtothecrowdhisfollies£»hisignorance£»orhisvices¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡but£»amongthearrowsshotathimfromeveryside£»wouldnoonebefoundpoisoned£¿wouldnotonereachsomespotinhisheartwherethewoundwouldbeincurable£¿whatistheworthofalifeexposedtotheattacksofenvioushatredorfuriousconviction£¿thechristiansyieldedonlythefragmentsoftheirfleshtothebeastsoftheamphitheatres£»themaninpowergivesuphispeace£»hisaffections£»hishonor£»tothecruelbitesofthepen¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡whileiwasmusinguponthesedangersofgreatness£»theusherenteredhastily¡£importantnewshadbeenreceived£ºtheministerisjustsummonedtothecouncil£»hewillnotbeabletotakehissisterstost¡£cloud¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡isaw£»throughthewindows£»theyoungladies£»whowerewaitingatthedoor£»sorrowfullygoupstairsagain£»whiletheirbrotherwentofftothecouncil¡£thecarriage£»whichshouldhavegonefilledwithsomuchfamilyhappiness£»isjustoutofsight£»carryingonlythecaresofastatesmaninit¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡theushercamebackdiscontentedanddisappointed¡£themoreorlessoflibertywhichheisallowedtoenjoy£»ishisbarometerofthepoliticalatmosphere¡£ifhegetsleave£»allgoeswell£»ifheiskeptathispost£»thecountryisindanger¡£hisopiniononpublicaffairsisbutacalculationofhisowninterest¡£myfriendisalmostastatesman¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ihadsomeconversationwithhim£»andhetoldmeseveralcuriousparticularsofpubliclife¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡thenewministerhasoldfriendswhoseopinionsheopposes£»thoughhestillretainshispersonalregardforthem¡£thoughseparatedfromthembythecolorshefightsunder£»theyremainunitedbyoldassociations£»buttheexigenciesofpartyforbidhimtomeetthem¡£iftheirintercoursecontinued£»itwouldawakensuspicion£»peoplewouldimaginethatsomedishonorablebargainwasgoingon£»hisfriendswouldbeheldtobetraitorsdesiroustosellthemselves£»andhethecorruptministerpreparedtobuythem¡£hehas£»therefore£»beenobligedtobreakofffriendshipsoftwentyyearsstanding£»andtosacrificeattachmentswhichhadbeeasecondnature¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡sometimes£»however£»theministerstillgiveswaytohisoldfeelings£»hereceivesorvisitshisfriendsprivately£»heshutshimselfupwiththem£»andtalksofthetimeswhentheycouldbeopenfriends¡£bydintofprecautionstheyhavehithertosucceededinconcealingthisblotoffriendshipagainstpolicy£»butsoonerorlaterthenewspaperswillbeinformedofit£»andwilldenouncehimtothecountryasanobjectofdistrust¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡forwhetherhatredbehonestordishonest£»itnevershrinksfromanyaccusation¡£sometimesitevenproceedstocrime¡£theusherassuredmethatseveralwarningshadbeengiventheministerwhichhadmadehimfearthevengeanceofanassassin£»andthathenolongerventuredoutonfoot¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡then£»fromonethingtoanother£»ilearnedwhattemptationscameintomisleadoroverehisjudgment£»howhefoundhimselffatallyledintoobliquitieswhichhecouldnotbutdeplore¡£misledbypassion£»over¡persuadedbyentreaties£»orpelledforreputationssake£»hehasmanytimesheldthebalancewithanunsteadyhand¡£howsadtheconditionofhimwhoisinauthority£¡notonlyarethemiseriesofpowerimposeduponhim£»butitsvicesalso£»which£»notcontentwithtorturing£»succeedincorruptinghim¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡weprolongedourconversationtillitwasinterruptedbytheministersreturn¡£hethrewhimselfoutofthecarriagewithahandfulofpapers£»andwithananxiousmannerwentintohisownroom¡£aninstantafterwardhisbellwasheard£»hissecretarywascalledtosendoffnoticestoallthoseinvitedfortheevening£»theballwouldnottakeplace£»theyspokem