the red badge of courage(红色英勇勋章)-第22部分
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no interferin' in his business。 I hate t' see th' boys fightin' 'mong
themselves。〃
The youth laughed。 〃Yer changed a good bit。 Yeh ain't at all like
yeh was。 I remember when you an' that Irish feller〃 He stopped and
laughed again。
〃No； I didn't use t' be that way；〃 said his friend thoughtfully。 〃That's
true 'nough。〃
〃Well； I didn't mean〃 began the youth。
The friend made another deprecatory gesture。 〃Oh； yeh needn't mind；
Henry。〃
There was another little pause。
〃Th' reg'ment lost over half th' men yestir… day；〃 remarked the friend
eventually。 〃I thought a course they was all dead； but； laws； they kep' a…
comin' back last night until it seems； after all； we didn't lose but a few。
They'd been scattered all over； wanderin' around in th' woods； fightin' with
other reg'ments； an' everything。 Jest like you done。〃
〃So？〃 said the youth。
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CHAPTER XV。
THE regiment was standing at order arms at the side of a lane；
waiting for the command to march； when suddenly the youth remembered
the little packet enwrapped in a faded yellow envelope which the loud
young soldier with lugu… brious words had intrusted to him。 It made him
start。 He uttered an exclamation and turned toward his comrade。
〃Wilson！〃
〃What？〃
His friend； at his side in the ranks； was thought… fully staring down the
road。 From some cause his expression was at that moment very meek。
The youth； regarding him with sidelong glances； felt impelled to change
his purpose。 〃Oh； noth… ing；〃 he said。
His friend turned his head in some surprise； 〃Why； what was yeh goin'
t' say？〃
〃Oh； nothing；〃 repeated the youth。
He resolved not to deal the little blow。 It
148 was sufficient that the fact made him glad。 It was not necessary
to knock his friend on the head with the misguided packet。
He had been possessed of much fear of his friend； for he saw how
easily questionings could make holes in his feelings。 Lately； he had as…
sured himself that the altered comrade would not tantalize him with a
persistent curiosity； but he felt certain that during the first period of leisure
his friend would ask him to relate his adventures of the previous day。
He now rejoiced in the possession of a small weapon with which he
could prostrate his com… rade at the first signs of a cross…examination。
He was master。 It would now be he who could laugh and shoot the shafts
of derision。
The friend had； in a weak hour； spoken with sobs of his own death。
He had delivered a mel… ancholy oration previous to his funeral； and had
doubtless in the packet of letters； presented vari… ous keepsakes to relatives。
But he had not died； and thus he had delivered himself into the hands of
the youth。
The latter felt immensely superior to his friend； but he inclined to
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condescension。 He adopted toward him an air of patronizing good
humor。
His self…pride was now entirely restored。 In the shade of its
flourishing growth he stood with braced and self…confident legs； and since
nothing could now be discovered he did not shrink from an encounter with
the eyes of judges； and allowed no thoughts of his own to keep him from
an attitude of manfulness。 He had performed his mistakes in the dark； so
he was still a man。
Indeed； when he remembered his fortunes of yesterday； and looked at
them from a distance he began to see something fine there。 He had
license to be pompous and veteranlike。
His panting agonies of the past he put out of his sight。
In the present； he declared to himself that it was only the doomed and
the damned who roared with sincerity at circumstance。 Few but they
ever did it。 A man with a full stomach and the respect of his fellows had
no business to scold about anything that he might think to be wrong in the
ways of the universe； or even with the ways of society。 Let the
unfortunates rail； the others may play marbles。
He did not give a great deal of thought to these battles that lay directly
before him。 It was not essential that he should plan his ways in regard to
them。 He had been taught that many obligations of a life were easily
avoided。 The lessons of yesterday had been that retribution was a
laggard and blind。 With these facts before him he did not deem it
necessary that he should become feverish over the possibilities of the
ensuing twenty…four hours。 He could leave much to chance。 Besides； a
faith in himself had secretly blossomed。 There was a little flower of
confidence growing within him。 He was now a man of experience。 He
had been out among the dragons； he said； and he assured himself that they
were not so hideous as he had imagined them。 Also； they were inaccurate；
they did not sting with precision。 A stout heart often defied； and defying；
escaped。
And； furthermore； how could they kill him who was the chosen of
gods and doomed to greatness？
He remembered how some of the men had run from the battle。 As he
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recalled their terror… struck faces he felt a scorn for them。 They had
surely been more fleet and more wild than was absolutely necessary。
They were weak mortals。 As for himself； he had fled with discretion and
dignity。
He was aroused from this reverie by his friend； who； having hitched
about nervously and blinked at the trees for a time； suddenly coughed in
an introductory way； and spoke。
〃Fleming！〃
〃What？〃
The friend put his hand up to his mouth and coughed again。 He
fidgeted in his jacket。
〃Well；〃 he gulped； at last； 〃I guess yeh might as well give me back
them letters。〃 Dark； prick… ling blood had flushed into his cheeks and
brow。
〃All right； Wilson；〃 said the youth。 He loosened two buttons of his
coat； thrust in his hand； and brought forth the packet。 As he ex… tended it
to his friend the latter's face was turned from him。
He had been slow in the act of producing the packet because during it
he had been trying to invent a remarkable comment upon the affair。 He
could conjure nothing of sufficient point。 He was compelled to allow his
friend to escape unmolested with his packet。 And for this he took unto
himself considerable credit。 It was a generous thing。
His friend at his side seemed suffering great shame。 As he
contemplated him； the youth felt his heart grow more strong and stout。
He had never been compelled to blush in such manner for his acts； he was
an individual of extraordi… nary virtues。
He reflected； with condescending pity： 〃Too bad！ Too bad！ The
poor devil； it makes him feel tough！〃
After this incident； and as he reviewed the battle pictures he had seen；
he felt quite com… petent to return home and make the hearts of the people
glow with stories of war。 He could see himself in a room of warm tints
telling tales to listeners。 He could exhibit laurels。 They were
insignificant； still； in a district where laurels were infrequent； they might
shine。
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He saw his gaping audience picturing him as the central figure in
blazing scenes。 And he imagined the consternation and the ejaculations
of his mother and the young lady at the seminary as they drank his recitals。
Their vague feminine formula for beloved ones doing brave deeds on the
field of battle without risk of life would be destroyed。
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CHAPTER XVI。
A SPUTTERING of musketry was always to be heard。 Later； the
cannon had entered the dis… pute。 In the fog…filled air their voices made a
thudding sound。 The reverberations were con… tinued。 This part of the
world led a strange； battleful existence。
The youth's regiment was marched to relieve a command that had lain
long in some damp trenches。 The men took positions behind a curv… ing
line of rifle pits that had been turned up； like a large furrow； along the line
of woods。 Before them was a level stretch； peopled with short； deformed
stumps。 From the woods beyond came the dull popping of the
skirmishers and picket
