creatures that once were men-第38部分
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at the man; and giggled provokingly。
Sergei turned away his head with a sigh; and after a few
moment's silence began to speak again。
〃Confound it all; but how jolly they seem together; it's good
to see! Why can't I have something like that? I; a waif and
a stray! I'd never leave such a woman! I'd always have my
arms round her; and there'd be no mistake about my loving the
little devil! I've never had any luck with women! They don't
like ginger hairwomen don't。 No。 She's a woman with fancies;
she is! She's a sly little devil! She wants to see life! Are
you asleep; Mitia?〃
〃No;〃 answered Mitia quietly。
〃Well; how are you going to live? To tell the truth; you're
as solitary as a post! That seems pretty hard! Where can you
go? You can't earn your living among strangers。 You're too
absurd! What's the use of a man who can't stand up for
himself? A man's got to have teeth and claws in this world!
They'll all have a go at you。 Can you stick up for yourself?
How would you set about it? Damn it all; where the devil could
you go?〃
239 ON A RAFT
〃I;〃 said Mitia; suddenly arousing herself; 〃I shall go away。
I shall go in the autumn to the Caucasian Mountains; and that
will be the end of it all。 My God! If only I could get away
from you all! Soulless; godless men! To get away from you;
that's my only hope! What do you live for? Where is your God?
He's nothing but a name! Do you live in Christ? You are
wolves; that's what you are! But over there live other men;
whose souls live in Christ。 Their hearts contain love; and
they are athirst for the salvation of the world。 But youyou
are beasts; spewing out filth。 But other men there are; I have
seen them; they called me; and I must go to them。 They gave me
the book of Holy Writ; and they said: 'Read; man of God; our
beloved brother; read the word of truth!' And I read; and my
soul was renewed by the word of God。 I shall go away。 I shall
leave all you ravening wolves。 You are rending each other's
flesh! Accursed be ye!〃
Mitia spoke in a passionate whisper; as if overpowered by the
intensity of his contemplative rapture; his anger with the
ravening wolves; and his desire to be with those other men;
whose souls aspired toward the salvation of the world。 Sergei
was taken aback。 He remained quiet for some time; open…mouthed;
holding his pipe in his hand。 After a few moments' thought he
glanced round; and said in a deep; rough voice: 〃Damn it all!
Why you're turned a bad 'un all at once! Why did you read that
book? It was very likely an evil one。 Well; be off; be off!
If not; there'll be an end of you! Be off with you before you
become a regular beast yourself! And who are these fellows in
the Caucasus? Monks? Or what?〃
240 ON A RAFT
But the fire of Mitia's spirit died down as quickly as it had
been kindled to a flame; he gasped with the exertion as he
worked the pole; and muttered to himself below his breath。
Sergei waited some time for the answer which did not come。 His
simple; hardy nature was quelled by the grim and death…like
stillness of the night。 He wanted to recall the fullness of
life; to wake the solitude with sound; to disturb and trouble
the hidden meditative silence of the leaden mass of water;
flowing slowly to the sea; and of the dull; threatening clouds
hanging motionless in the air。 At the other end of the raft
there was life; and it called on him to live。
Forward; he could hear every now and then bursts of contented
laughter; exclamations; sounds that seemed to stand out against
the silence of this night; laden with the breath of spring; and
provoking such passionate life desires。
〃Hold hard; Mitia! you'll catch it again from the old man!
Look out there!〃 said Sergei; who could not stand the silence
any longer; and watching Mitia; who aimlessly moved his pole
backward and forward in the water。
Mitia; wiping his moist brow; stood quietly leaning with his
breast against the pole; and panting。
〃There are few steamers to…night;〃 continued Sergei; 〃we've
only passed one these many hours。〃 Seeing that Mitia had no
intention of answering; Sergei replied quietly to himself:
〃It's because its too early in the season。 It's only just
beginning。 We shall soon be at Kazan。 The Volga pulls hard。
She has a mighty strong back; that can carry all。 Why are
you standing still like that? Are you angry? Hi; there;
Mitia!〃
241 ON A RAFT
〃What's the matter?〃 Mitia cried in a vexed tone。
〃Nothing; you strange fellow; but why can't you talk? You
are always thinking。 Leave it alone! Thinking is bad for a
man。 A wise sort of fellow you are! You think and think; and
all the time you can't understand that you're a fool at bottom。
Ha! Ha!〃
And Sergei; very well satisfied with his own superiority;
cleared his throat; remained quiet for a moment; whistled a
note; and then continued to develop his theme。
〃Thinking? Is that an occupation for a working man? Look at
your father; he doesn't think much; he lives。 He loves your
wife; and they laugh at you together; you wise fool! That's
about it! Just listen to them! Blast them! I believe
Marka's already with child。 Never fear; the child won't
feature you。 He'll be a fine; lusty lad; like Silan himself!
But he'll be your child! Ha! Ha! Ha! He'll call you
father! And you won't be his father; but his brother; and his
real father will be his grandfather! That's a nice state of
things! What a filthy family! But they're a strapping pair!
Isn't that true; Mitia?〃
〃Sergei!〃 In a passionate; sobbing whisper。 〃In the name of
Christ I entreat you don't tear my soul to pieces; don't brand
me with fire。 Leave me alone。 Do be quiet! In the name of
God and of Christ; I beg you not to speak to me! Don't
disturb me! Don't drain my heart's blood! I'll throw myself
in the river; and yours will be the sin; and a great sin it will
be! I should lose my soul; don't force me to it! For God's
sake; I entreat you!〃
242 ON A RAFT
The silence of the night was troubled with shrill; unnatural
sobbing; and Mitia fell on the deck of the raft; as if a blast
from the overhanging clouds had struck him down。
〃Come; come!〃 growled Sergei; anxiously watching his mate
writhing on the deck; as if scorched with fire。 〃What a
strange man! He ought to have told me if it was notif it
was not quite〃
〃You've been torturing me all the way。 Why? Am I your enemy?〃
Mitia sobbed again。
〃You're a strange lad! a rum un!〃 murmured Sergei; confused and
offended。 〃How could I know? I couldn't tell you'd take on
like that!〃
〃Understand; then; that I want to forget! To forget for ever!
My shame; my terrible torture。 You're a cruel lot! I shall go
away; and stay away for ever! I can't stand it any more!〃
〃Yes; be off with you!〃 cried Sergei across the raft;
accentuating his exclamation with a loud and cynical curse。
Then he seemed to shrink together; as if himself afraid of the
terrible drama which was unfolding itself before him; drama;
which he was now compelled to understand。 。 。 。
〃Hullo! There! I'm calling you! Are you deaf?〃 sounded up
the river the voice of Silan。 〃What are you about there? What
are you bawling about? Ahoy! Ahoy!〃
243 ON A RAFT
It seemed as if Silan enjoyed shouting; and breaking the heavy
silence of the river with his deep voice; full of strength and
health。 The cries succeeded each other; thrilling the warm;
moist air; and seeming to crush down on Mitia's feeble form。
He rose; and once more pressed his body against the steering
pole。 Sergei shouted in reply to the master with all his
strength; and cursed him at the same time under his breath。
The two voices broke through and filled the silence of the
night。 Then they seemed to meet in one deep note like the
sound of a great horn。 Once more rising to shrillness; they
floated in the air; gradually sank awayand were lost。
Silence reigned once more。
Through the cleft clouds; on the dark water the yellow splashes
of moonlight fell; and after glittering a moment disappeared;
swept away in the moist gloom。
The raft continued on its way down stream amid silence and
darkness。
CHAPTER II
Near one of the forward poles stood Silan Petroff in a red
shirt; open at the neck; showing his powerful throat and hairy
chest; hard as an anvil。 A thatch of gray hair fell over his
forehead; under which laughed great black; warm eyes。 His
sleeves; turned up to the elbow; showed the veins standing out
on his arms as they held the pole。 Silan was leaning slightly
forward; and looking watchfully ahead。 Marka stood a few paces
from him; glancing with a satisfied smile at the strong form of
her lover。 They were both silent and busy with their several
thoughts。 He was peering into the distance; and she followed
the movements of his virile; bearded face。
244 ON A RAFT
〃That must be a fisherman's fire;〃 said he; turning toward her。
〃It's all right; we're keeping on our course; Ouch!〃 And he
puffed out a full; hot breath; and gave a powerful shove with
his pole。
〃Don't tire yourself Mashourka;〃 he continued; watching her;
as with her pole she made a skilful movement。
She was round and plump; with black; bright eyes and ruddy
cheeks; barefooted; dressed only in a damp petticoat; which
clung to her body; and showed the outline of her figure。 She
turned her face to Silan and; smiling pleasantly; said: 〃You
take too much care of me; I'm all right!〃
〃I kiss you; but I don't take care of you;〃 answere