david copperfield(大卫.科波维尔)-第119部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


growing　late；　Peggotty　and　Mr。　Dick　took　that　opportunity　of　
repairing　to　the　chandler’s　shop　together。　I　parted　from　him；　poor　
fellow；　at　the　corner　of　the　street；　with　his　great　kite　at　his　back；　a　
very　monument　of　human　misery。　

My　aunt　was　walking　up　and　down　the　room　when　I　returned；　
crimping　the　borders　of　her　nightcap　with　her　fingers。　I　warmed　
the　ale　and　made　the　toast　on　the　usual　infallible　principles。　When　
it　was　ready　for　her；　she　was　ready　for　it；　with　her　nightcap　on；　
and　the　skirt　of　her　gown　turned　back　on　her　knees。　

‘My　dear；’　said　my　aunt；　after　taking　a　spoonful　of　it；　‘it’s　a　great　
deal　better　than　wine。　Not　half　so　bilious。’　

I　suppose　I　looked　doubtful；　for　she　added：　

‘Tut；　tut；　child。　If　nothing　worse　than　Ale　happens　to　us；　we　are　
well　off。’　

‘I　should　think　so　myself；　aunt；　I　am　sure；’　said　I。　

‘Well；　then；　why　don’t　you　think　so？’　said　my　aunt。　

‘Because　you　and　I　are　very　different　people；’　I　returned。　

‘Stuff　and　nonsense；　Trot！’　replied　my　aunt。　

My　aunt　went　on　with　a　quiet　enjoyment；　in　which　there　was　
very　little　affectation；　if　any；　drinking　the　warm　ale　with　a　teaspoon；　and　soaking　her　strips　of　toast　in　it。　

‘Trot；’　said　she；　‘I　don’t　care　for　strange　faces　in　general；　but　I　
rather　like　that　Barkis　of　yours；　do　you　know！’　

‘It’s　better　than　a　hundred　pounds　to　hear　you　say　so！’　said　I。　

‘It’s　a　most　extraordinary　world；’　observed　my　aunt；　rubbing　
her　nose；　‘how　that　woman　ever　got　into　it　with　that　name；　is　
unaccountable　to　me。　It　would　be　much　more　easy　to　be　born　a　
Jackson；　or　something　of　that　sort；　one　would　think。’　

Charles　Dickens　ElecBook　Classics　


David　Copperfield　

‘Perhaps　she　thinks　so；　too；　it’s　not　her　fault；’　said　I。　

‘I　suppose　not；’　returned　my　aunt；　rather　grudging　the　
admission；　‘but　it’s　very　aggravating。　However；　she’s　Barkis　now。　
That’s　some　comfort。　Barkis　is　uncommonly　fond　of　you；　Trot。’　

‘There　is　nothing　she　would　leave　undone　to　prove　it；’　said　I。　

‘Nothing；　I　believe；’　returned　my　aunt。　‘Here；　the　poor　fool　has　
been　begging　and　praying　about　handing　over　some　of　her　
money—because　she　has　got　too　much　of　it。　A　simpleton！’　

My　aunt’s　tears　of　pleasure　were　positively　trickling　down　into　
the　warm　ale。　

‘She’s　the　most　ridiculous　creature　that　ever　was　born；’　said　my　
aunt。　‘I　knew；　from　the　first　moment　when　I　saw　her　with　that　
poor　dear　blessed　baby　of　a　mother　of　yours；　that　she　was　the　most　
ridiculous　of　mortals。　But　there　are　good　points　in　Barkis！’　

Affecting　to　laugh；　she　got　an　opportunity　of　putting　her　hand　
to　her　eyes。　Having　availed　herself　of　it；　she　resumed　her　toast　
and　her　discourse　together。　

‘Ah！　Mercy　upon　us！’　sighed　my　aunt。　‘I　know　all　about　it；　Trot！　
Barkis　and　myself　had　quite　a　gossip　while　you　were　out　with　
Dick。　I　know　all　about　it。　I　don’t　know　where　these　wretched　girls　
expect　to　go　to；　for　my　part。　I　wonder　they　don’t　knock　out　their　
brains　against—against　mantelpieces；’　said　my　aunt；　an　idea　
which　was　probably　suggested　to　her　by　her　contemplation　of　
mine。　

‘Poor　Emily！’　said　I。　

‘Oh；　don’t　talk　to　me　about　poor；’　returned　my　aunt。　‘She　
should　have　thought　of　that；　before　she　caused　so　much　misery！　
Give　me　a　kiss；　Trot。　I　am　sorry　for　your　early　experience。’　

As　I　bent　forward；　she　put　her　tumbler　on　my　knee　to　detain　

Charles　Dickens　ElecBook　Classics　


David　Copperfield　

me；　and　said：　

‘Oh；　Trot；　Trot！　And　so　you　fancy　yourself　in　love！　Do　you？’　

‘Fancy；　aunt！’　I　exclaimed；　as　red　as　I　could　be。　‘I　adore　her　
with　my　whole　soul！’　

‘Dora；　indeed！’　returned　my　aunt。　‘And　you　mean　to　say　the　
little　thing　is　very　fascinating；　I　suppose？’　

‘My　dear　aunt；’　I　replied；　‘no　one　can　form　the　least　idea　what　
she　is！’　

‘Ah！　And　not　silly？’　said　my　aunt。　

‘Silly；　aunt！’　

I　seriously　believe　it　had　never　once　entered　my　head　for　a　
single　moment；　to　consider　whether　she　was　or　not。　I　resented　the　
idea；　of　course；　but　I　was　in　a　manner　struck　by　it；　as　a　new　one　
altogether。　

‘Not　light…headed？’　said　my　aunt。　

‘Light…headed；　aunt！’　I　could　only　repeat　this　daring　speculation　
with　the　same　kind　of　feeling　with　which　I　had　repeated　the　
preceding　question。　

‘Well；　well！’　said　my　aunt。　‘I　only　ask。　I　don’t　depreciate　her。　
Poor　little　couple！　And　so　you　think　you　were　formed　for　one　
another；　and　are　to　go　through　a　party…supper…table　kind　of　life；　
like　two　pretty　pieces　of　confectionery；　do　you；　Trot？’　

She　asked　me　this　so　kindly；　and　with　such　a　gentle　air；　half　
playful　and　half　sorrowful；　that　I　was　quite　touched。　

‘We　are　young　and　inexperienced；　aunt；　I　know；’　I　replied；　‘and　
I　dare　say　we　say　and　think　a　good　deal　that　is　rather　foolish。　But　
we　love　one　another　truly；　I　am　sure。　If　I　thought　Dora　could　ever　
love　anybody　else；　or　cease　to　love　me；　or　that　I　could　ever　love　
anybody　else；　or　cease　to　love　her；　I　don’t　know　what　I　should　do—　

Charles　Dickens　ElecBook　Classics　


David　Copperfield　

go　out　of　my　mind；　I　think！’　

‘Ah；　Trot！’　said　my　aunt；　shaking　her　head；　and　smiling　gravely；　
‘blind；　blind；　blind！’　

‘Someone　that　I　know；　Trot；’　my　aunt　pursued；　after　a　pause；　
‘though　of　a　very　pliant　disposition；　has　an　earnestness　of　affection　
in　him　that　reminds　me　of　poor　Baby。　Earnestness　is　what　that　
Somebody　must　look　for；　to　sustain　him　and　improve　him；　Trot。　
Deep；　downright；　faithful　earnestness。’　

‘If　you　only　knew　the　earnestness　of　Dora；　aunt！’　I　cried。　

‘Oh；　Trot！’　she　said　again；　‘blind；　blind！’　and　without　knowing　
why；　I　felt　a　vague　unhappy　loss　or　want　of　something　overshadow　
me　like　a　cloud。　

‘However；’　said　my　aunt；　‘I　don’t　want　to　put　two　young　
creatures　out　of　conceit　with　themselves；　or　to　make　them　
unhappy；　so；　though　it　is　a　girl　and　boy　attachment；　and　girl　and　
boy　attachments　very　often—mind！　I　don’t　say　always！—come　to　
nothing；　still　we’ll　be　serious　about　it；　and　hope　for　a　prosperous　
issue　one　of　these　days。　There’s　time　enough　for　it　to　come　to　
anything！’　

This　was　not　upon　the　whole　very　comforting　to　a　rapturous　
lover；　but　I　was　glad　to　have　my　aunt　in　my　confidence；　and　I　was　
mindful　of　her　being　fatigued。　So　I　thanked　her　ardently　for　this　
mark　of　her　affection；　and　for　all　her　other　kindnesses　towards　me；　
and　after　a　tender　good　night；　she　took　her　nightcap　into　my　
bedroom。　

How　miserable　I　was；　when　I　lay　down！　How　I　thought　and　
thought　about　my　being　poor；　in　Mr。　Spenlow’s　eyes；　about　my　not　
being　what　I　thought　I　was；　when　I　proposed　to　Dora；　about　the　
chivalrous　necessity　of　telling　Dora　what　my　worldly　condition　

Charles　Dickens　ElecBook　Classics　


David　Copperfield　

was；　and　releasing　her　from　her　engagement　if　she　thought　fit；　
about　how　I　should　contrive　to　live；　during　the　long　term　of　my　
articles；　when　I　was　earning　nothing；　about　doing　something　to　
assist　my　aunt；　and　seeing　no　way　of　doing　anything；　about　coming　
down　to　have　no　money　in　my　pocket；　and　to　wear　a　shabby　coat；　
and　to　be　able　to　carry　Dora　no　little　presents；　and　to　ride　no　
gallant　greys；　and　to　show　myself　in　no　agreeable　light！　Sordid　
and　selfish　as　I　knew　it　was；　and　as　I　tortured　myself　by　knowing　
that　it　was；　to　let　my　mind　run　on　my　own　distress　so　much；　I　was　
so　devoted　to　Dora　that　I　could　not　help　it。　I　knew　that　it　was　base　
in　me　not　to　think　more　of　my　aunt；　and　less　of　myself；　but；　so　far；　
selfishness　was　inseparable　from　Dora；　and　I　could　not　put　Dora　
on　one　side　for　any　mortal　creature。　How　exceedingly　miserable　I　
was；　that　night！　

As　to　sleep；　I　had　dreams　of　poverty　in　all　sorts　of　shapes；　but　I　
seemed　to　dream　without　the　previous　ceremony　of　going　to　sleep。　
Now　I　was　ragged；　wanting　to　sell　Dora　matches；　six　bundles　for　a　
halfpenny；　now　I　was　at　the　office　in　a　nightgown　and　boots；　
remonstrated　with　by　Mr。　Spenlow　on　appearing　before　the　clients　
in　that　airy　attire；　now　I　was　hungrily　picking　up　the　crumbs　that　
fell　from　old　Tiffey’s　daily　biscuit；　regularly　eaten　when　St。　Paul’s　
struck　one；　now　I　was　hopelessly　endeavouring　to　get　a　licence　to　
marry　Dora；　having　nothing　but　one　of　Uriah　Heep’s　gloves　to　
offer　in　exchange；　which　the　whole　Commons　rejected；　and　still；　
more　or　less　conscious　of　my　own　room；　I　was　always　tossing　about　
like　a　distressed　ship　in　a　sea　of　bed…clothes。　

My　aunt　was　restless；　too；　for　I　frequently　heard　her　walking　to　
and　fro。　Two　or　three　times　in　the　course　of　the　night；　attired　in　a　
long　flannel　wrapper　in　which　she　looked　seven　feet　high；　she　

Charles　Dickens　ElecBook　Classics　


David　Copperfield　690　

appeared；　like　a　disturbed　ghost；　in　my　room；　and　came　to　the　side　
of　the　sofa　on　which　I　lay。　On　the　first　occasion　I　started　up　in　
alarm；　to　learn　that　she　inferred　from　a　particular　light　in　the　sky；　
that　Westminster　Abbey　was　on　fire；　and　to　be　consulted　in　
reference　to　the　probability　of　its　igniting　Buckingham　Street；　in　
case　the　wind　changed。　Lying　still；　after　that；　I　found　that　she　sat　
down　near　me；　whispering　to　herself　‘Poor　boy！’　And　then　it　made　
me　twenty　times　more　wretched；　to　know　how　unselfishly　mindful　
she　was　of　me；　and　how　selfishly　mindful　I　was　of　myself。　

It　was　difficult　to　believe　that　a　night　so　long　to　me；　could　be　
short　to　anybody　else。　This　consideration　set　me　thinking　and　
thinking　of　an　imaginary　party　where　people　were　dancing　the　
hours　away；　until　that　became　a　dream　too；　and　I　heard　the　music　
incessantly　playing　one　tune；　and　saw　Dora　incessantly　dancing　
one　dance；　without　taking　the　least　notice　of　me。　The　man　who　
had　been　playing　the　harp　all　night；　was　trying　in　vain　to　cover　it　
with　an　ordinary…sized　nightcap；　when　I　awoke；　or　I　should　rather　
say；　when　I　left　off　trying　to　go　to　sleep；　and　saw　the　sun　shining　in　
through　the　window　at　last。　

There　was　an　old　Roman　bath　in　those　days　at　the　bottom　of　
one　of　the　streets　out　of　the　Strand—it　may　be　there　still—in　
which　I　have　had　many　a　cold　plunge。　Dressing　myself　as　quietly　
as　I　could；　and　leav