four arthurian romances-第30部分

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fore；　he　has　no　ground　for　complaint；　nor　can　I　make　any　claim　against　him。　　One　cannot　love　with　the　eyes　alone。　　What　crime；　then；　have　my　eyes　committed；　if　their　glance　but　follows　my　desire？　　What　is　their　fault　and　what　their　sin？　　Ought　I　to　blame　them；　then？　　Nay；　verily。　　Who；　then；　should　be　blamed？　Surely　myself；　who　have　them　in　control。　　My　eye　glances　at　nothing　unless　it　gives　my　　heart　delight。　　My　heart　ought　not　to　have　any　desire　which　would　give　me　pain。　　Yet　its　desire　causes　me　pain。　　Pain？　　Upon　my　faith；　I　must　be　mad；　if　to　please　my　heart　I　wish　for　something　which　troubles　me。　　If　I　can；　I　ought　to　banish　any　wish　that　distresses　me。　　If　I　can？　　Mad　one；　what　have　I　said？　　I　must；　indeed；　have　little　power　if　I　have　no　control　over　myself。　　Does　Love　think　to　set　me　in　the　same　path　which　is　wont　to　lead　others　astray？　　Others　he　may　lead　astray；　but　not　me　who　care　not　for　him。　　Never　shall　I　be　his；　nor　ever　was；　and　I　shall　never　seek　his　friendship。〃　　Thus　she　argues　with　herself；　one　moment　loving；　and　hating　the　next。　　She　is　in　such　doubt　that　she　does　not　know　which　course　she　had　better　adopt。　　She　thinks　to　be　on　the　defence　against　Love；　but　defence　is　not　what　she　wants。　　God！　　She　does　not　know　that　Alexander　is　thinking　of　her　too！　　Love　bestows　upon　them　equally　such　a　share　as　is　their　due。　　He　treats　them　very　fairly　and　justly；　for　each　one　loves　and　desires　the　other。　　And　this　love　would　be　true　and　right　if　only　each　one　knew　what　was　the　other's　wish。　　But　he　does　not　know　what　her　desire　is；　and　she　knows　not　the　cause　of　his　distress。

（Vv。　541…574。）　　The　Queen　takes　note　of　them　and　sees　them　often　blanch　and　pale　and　heave　deep　sighs　and　tremble。　　But　she　knows　no　reason　why　they　should　do　so；　unless　it　be　because　of　the　sea　where　they　are。　　I　think　she　would　have　divined　the　cause　had　the　sea　not　thrown　her　off　her　guard；　but　the　sea　deceives　and　tricks　her；　so　that　she　does　not　discover　love　because　of　the　sea；　and　it　is　from　love　that　comes　the　bitter　pain　that　distresses　them。　（12）　　But　of　the　three　concerned；　the　Queen　puts　all　the　blame　upon　the　sea；　for　the　other　two　accuse　the　third　to　her；　and　hold　it　alone　responsible　for　their　guilt。　　Some　one　who　is　not　at　fault　is　often　blamed　for　another's　wrong。　　Thus；　the　Queen　lays　all　the　blame　and　guilt　upon　the　sea；　but　it　is　unfair　to　put　the　blame　upon　the　sea；　for　it　is　guilty　of　no　misdeed。　　Soredamors'　deep　distress　continued　until　the　vessel　came　to　port。　　As　for　the　King；　it　is　well　known　that　the　Bretons　were　greatly　pleased；　and　served　him　gladly　as　their　liege　lord。　　But　of　King　Arthur　I　will　not　longer　speak　in　this　place；　rather　shall　you　hear　me　tell　　how　Love　distresses　these　two　lovers　whom　he　has　attacked。

（Vv。　575…872。）　　Alexander　loves　and　desires　her；　and　she；　too；　pines　for　the　love　of　him；　but　he　knows　it　not；　nor　will　he　know　it　until　he　has　suffered　many　a　pain　and　many　a　grief。　　It　is　for　her　sake　that　he　renders　to　the　Queen　loving　service；　as　well　as　to　her　maids…in…waiting；　but　to　her　on　whom　his　thoughts　are　fixed；　he　dares　not　speak　or　address　a　word。　　If　she　but　dared　to　assert　to　him　the　right　which　she　thinks　she　has；　she　would　gladly　inform　him　of　the　truth；　but　she　does　not　dare；　and　cannot　do　it。　　They　dare　neither　speak　nor　act　in　accordance　with　what　each　sees　in　the　otherwhich　works　a　great　hardship　to　them　both；　and　their　love　but　grows　and　flames　the　more。　　However；　it　is　the　custom　of　all　lovers　to　feast　their　eyes　gladly　with　gazing；　if　they　can　do　no　more；　and　they　assume　that；　because　they　find　pleasure　in　that　which　causes　their　love　to　be　born　and　grow；　therefore　it　must　be　to　their　advantage；　whereas　it　only　harms　them　more；　just　as　he　who　approaches　and　draws　close　beside　the　fire　burns　himself　more　than　he　who　holds　aloof。　　Their　love　waxes　and　grows　anon；　but　each　is　abashed　before　the　other；　and　so　much　is　hidden　and　concealed　that　no　flame　or　smoke　arises　from　the　coals　beneath　the　ashes。　　The　heat　is　no　less　on　this　account；　but　rather　is　better　sustained　beneath　the　ashes　than　above。　　Both　of　them　are　in　great　torment；　for；　in　order　that　none　may　perceive　their　trouble；　they　are　forced　to　deceive　people　by　a　feigned　bearing；　but　at　night　comes　the　bitter　moan；　which　each　one　makes　within　his　breast。　　Of　Alexander　I　will　tell　you　first　how　he　complains　and　vents　his　grief。　　Love　presents　before　his　mind　her　for　whom　he　is　in　such　distress；　it　is　she　who　has　filched　his　heart　away；　and　grants　him　no　rest　upon　his　bed；　because；　forsooth；　he　delights　to　recall　the　beauty　and　the　grace　of　her　who；　he　has　no　hope；　will　ever　bring　him　any　joy。　　〃I　may　as　well　hold　myself　a　madman。〃　he　exclaims。　　〃A　madman？　Truly；　I　am　beside　myself；　when　I　dare　not　speak　what　I　have　in　mind；　for　it　would　speedily　fare　worse　with　me　（if　I　held　my　peace）。　　I　have　engaged　my　thoughts　in　a　mad　emprise。　　But　is　it　not　better　to　keep　my　thoughts　to　myself　than　to　be　called　a　fool？　　My　wish　will　never　then　be　known。　　Shall　I　then　conceal　the　cause　of　my　distress；　and　not　dare　to　seek　aid　and　healing　for　my　wound？　　He　is　mad　who　feels　himself　afflicted；　and　seeks　not　what　will　bring　him　health；　if　perchance　he　may　find　it　anywhere；　but　many　a　one　seeks　his　welfare　by　striving　for　his　heart's　desire；　who　pursues　only　that　which　brings　him　woe　instead。　　And　why　should　one　ask　for　advice；　who　does　not　expect　to　gain　his　health？　　He　would　only　exert　himself　in　vain。　　I　feel　my　own　illness　to　be　so　grievous　that　I　shall　never　be　healed　by　any　medicine　or　draught；　by　any　herb　or　root。　　For　some　ills　there　is　no　remedy；　and　mine　lies　so　deep　within　that　it　is　beyond　the　reach　of　medicine。　　Is　there　no　help；　then？　　Methinks　I　have　lied。　　When　first　I　felt　this　malady；　if　I　had　dared　to　make　mention　of　it。　　I　might　have　spoken　with　a　physician　who　could　have　completely　cured　me。　　But　I　like　not　to　discuss　such　matters；　I　think　he　would　pay　me　no　heed　and　would　not　consent　to　accept　a　fee。　　No　wonder；　then；　if　I　am　terrified；　for　I　am　very　ill；　yet　I　do　not　know　what　disease　this　is　which　has　me　in　its　grip；　and　I　know　not　whence　this　pain　has　come。　　I　do　not　know？　　I　know　full　well　that　it　is　Love　who　does　me　this　injury。　　How　is　that？　　Can　Love　do　harm？　　Is　he　not　gentle　and　well…bred？　　I　used　to　think　that　there　was　naught　but　good　in　Love；　but　I　have　found　him　full　of　enmity。　　He　who　has　not　had　experience　of　him　does　not　know　what　tricks　Love　plays。　　He　is　a　fool　who　joins　his　ranks；　for　he　always　seeks　to　harm　his　followers。　　Upon　my　faith；　his　tricks　are　bad。　　It　is　poor　sport　to　play　with　him；　for　his　game　will　only　do　me　harm。　　What　shall　I　do；　then？　　Shall　I　retreat？　　I　think　it　would　be　wise　to　do　so；　but　I　know　not　how　to　do　it。　　If　Love　chastens　and　threatens　me　in　order　to　teach　and　instruct　me；　ought　I　to　disdain　my　teacher？　　He　is　a　fool　who　scorns　his　master。　　I　ought　to　keep　and　cherish　the　lesson　which　Love　teaches　me；　for　great　good　may　soon　come　of　it。　　But　I　am　frightened　because　he　beats　me　so。　　And　dost　thou　complain；　when　no　sign　of　blow　or　wound　appears？　　Art　thou　not　mistaken？　　Nay；　for　he　has　wounded　me　so　deep　that　he　has　shot　his　dart　to　my　very　heart；　and　has　not　yet　drawn　it　out　again。　（13）　　How　has　he　pierced　thy　body　with　it；　when　no　wound　appears　without？　　Tell　me　that；　for　I　wish　to　know。　　How　did　he　make　it　enter　in？　　Through　the　eye。　　Through　the　eye？　　But　he　has　not　put　it　out？　　He　did　not　harm　the　eye　at　all；　but　all　the　pain　is　in　the　heart。　　Then　tell　me；　if　the　dart　passed　through　the　eye；　how　is　it　that　the　eye　itself　is　not　injured　or　put　out。　　If　the　dart　entered　through　the　eye；　why　does　the　heart　in　the　breast　complain；　when　the　eye；　which　received　the　first　effect；　makes　no　complaint　of　it　at　all？　　I　can　readily　account　for　that：　the　eye　is　not　concerned　with　the　understanding；　nor　has　it　any　part　in　it；　but　it　is　the　mirror　of　the　heart；　and　through　this　mirror　passes；　without　doing　harm　or　injury；　the　flame　which　sets　the　heart　on　fire。　　For　is　not　the　heart　placed　in　the　breast　just　like　a　lighted　candle　which　is　set　in　a　lantern？　　If　you　take　the　candle　away　no　light　will　shine　from　the　lantern；　but　so　long　as　the　candle　lasts　the　lantern　is　not　dark　at　all；　and　the　flame　which　shines　within　does　it　no　harm　or　injury。　　Likewise　with　a　pane　of　glass；　which　might　be　very　strong　and　solid；　and　yet　a　ray　of　the　sun　could　pass　through　it　without　cracking　it　at　all；　yet　a　piece　of　glass　will　never　be　so　bright　as　to　enable　one　to　see；　unless　a　stronger　light　strikes　its　surface。　　Know　that　the　same　thing　is　true　of　the　eyes　as　of　the　glass　and　the　lantern；　for　the　light　strikes　the　eyes　in　which　the　heart　is　accustomed　to　see　itself　reflected；　and　lo！　it　sees　some　light　outside；　and　many　other　things；　some　green；　some　purple；　others　red　or　blue；　and　some　it　dislikes；　and　some　it　likes；　scorning　some　and　prizing　others。　　But　many　an　object　seems　fair　to　it　when　it　looks　at　it　in　the　glass；　which　will　deceive　it　if　it　is　not　on　its　guard。　　My　mirror　has　greatly　deceived　me；　for　in　it　my　heart　saw　a　ray　of　light　with　which　I　am　afflicted；　and　which　has　penetrated　deep　within　me；　causing　me　to　lose　my　wits。　　I　am　ill…treated　by　my　friend；　who　deserts　me　for　my　enemy。　　I　may　well　accuse　him　of　felony　for　the　wrong　he　has　done　to　me。　　I　thought　I　had　three　friends；　my　heart　and　my　two　eyes　together；　but　it　seems　that　they　hate　me。　　Where　shall　I　ever　find　a　friend；　when　these　three　are　my　enemies；　belonging　to　me；　yet　putting　me　to　death？　My　servants　mock　at　my　authority；　in　doing　what　they　please　without　consulting　my　desire。　　After　my　experience　with　these　who　have　done　me　wrong；　I　know　full　well　that　a　good　man's　love　may　be　befouled　by　wicked　servants　in　his　employ。　　He　who　is　attended　by　a　wicked　servant　will　surely　have　cause　to　rue　it；　sooner　or　later。　　Now　I　will　tell　you　how　the　arrow；　which　has　come　into　my　keeping　and　possession；　is　made　and　fashioned；　but　I　fear　greatly　that　I　shall　fail　in　the　attempt；　for　the　fashion　of　it　is　so　fine　that　it　will　be　no　wonder　if　I　fail。　　Yet　I　shall　devote　all　my　effort　to　telling　you　how　it　seems　to　me。　　The　notch　and　the　feathers　are　so　close　together；　when　carefully　examined；　that　the　line　of　separation　is　as　fine　as　a　hair's　brea