thais(塞斯)-第14部分
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philosopher reads the books of other philosophersand that is your fault；
you naughty child。 It is true that； as long as we are what we are； we shall
never find anything but our own thoughts in the thoughts of others； and
that all of us are somewhat inclined to read books as I have read this one。〃
She did not hear him； her soul was still before the Nubian's tomb。 As
he heard her sigh； he kissed her on the neck； and said
〃Do not be sad； my child。 We are never happy in this world； except
when we forget the world。
〃Come； let us cheat lifeit is sure to take its revenge。 Come； let us
love！〃
But she pushed him away。
〃/We/ love！〃 she cried bitterly。 〃/You/ never loved any one。 And /I/ do
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not love /you/！ No！ I do not love you！ I hate you！ Go！ I hate you！ I curse
and despise all who are happy； and all who are rich！ Go！ Go！ Goodness is
only found amongst the unfortunate。 When I was a child I knew a black
slave who died on the cross。 He was good； he was filled with love； and he
knew the secret of life。 You are not worthy to wash his feet。 Go！ I never
wish to see you again！〃
She threw herself on her face on the carpet； and passed the night
sobbing and weeping； and forming resolutions to live； in future； like Saint
Theodore； in poverty and humbleness。
The next day； she devoted herself again to those pleasures to which she
was addicted。 As she knew that her beauty； though still intact； would not
last very long； she hastened to derive all the enjoyment and all the fame
she could from it。 At the theatre； where she acted and studied more than
ever； she gave life to the imagination of sculptors； painters； and poets。
Recognising that there was in the attitudes； movements； and walk of the
actress； an idea of the divine harmony which rules the spheres； wise men
and philosophers considered that such perfect grace was a virtue in itself；
and said； 〃Thais also is a geometrician！〃 The ignorant； the poor； the
humble； and the timid before whom she consented to appear； regarded her
as a blessing from heaven。 Yet she was sad amidst all the praise she
received； and dreaded death more than ever。 Nothing was able to set her
mind at rest； not even her house and gardens； which were celebrated； and a
proverb throughout the city。
The gardens were planted with trees； brought at great expense from
India and Persia。 They were watered by a running brook； and colonnades
in ruins； and imitation rocks； arranged by a skilful artist； were reflected in
a lake； which also mirrored the statues that stood round it。 In the middle of
the garden was the Grotto of Nymphs； which owed its name to three life…
size figures of women； which stood on the threshold。 They were
represented as divesting themselves of their garments； and about to bathe。
They anxiously turned their heads； fearing to be seen； and looked as
though they were alive。 The only light which entered the building came；
tempered and iridescent； through thin sheets of water。 All the walls were
hungas in the sacred grottoeswith wreaths； garlands； and votive
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pictures； in which the beauty of Thais was celebrated。 There were also
tragic and comic masks； bright with colours； and paintings representing
theatrical scenes or grotesque figures； or fabulous animals。 On a stele in
the centre stood a little ivory Eros of wonderful antique workmanship。 It
was a gift from Nicias。 In one of the bays was a figure of a goat in black
marble； with shining agate eyes。 Six alabaster kids crowded round its teats；
but； raising its cloven hoofs and its ugly head； it seemed impatient to
climb the rocks。 The floor was covered with Byzantine carpets； pillows
embroidered by the yellow men of Cathay； and the skins of Libyan lions。
Perfumed smoke arose from golden censers。 Flowering plants grew in
large onyx vases。 And at the far end； in the purple shadow； gleamed the
gold nails on the shell of a huge Indian tortoise turned upside down； which
served as the bed of the actress。 It was here that every day； to the murmur
of the water； and amid perfumes and flowers； Thais reclined softly； and
conversed with her friends； while awaiting the hour of supper； or
meditated in solitude on theatrical art； or on the flight of years。
On the afternoon after the games； Thais was reposing in the Grotto of
Nymphs。 She had noticed in her mirror the first signs of the decay of her
beauty； and she was frightened to think that white hair and wrinkles would
at last come。 She vainly tried to comfort herself with the assurance that she
could recover her fresh complexion by burning certain herbs and
pronouncing a few magic words。 A pitiless voice cried； 〃You will grow old
Thais； you will grow old。〃 And a cold sweat of terror bedewed her
forehead。 Then； on looking at herself again in the mirror with infinite
tenderness； she found that she was still beautiful and worthy to be loved。
She smiled to herself； and murmured； 〃There is not a woman in
Alexandria who can rival me in suppleness or grace or movement； or in
splendour of arms； and the arms； my mirror； are the real chains of love！〃
While she was thus thinking she saw an unknown manthin； with
burning eyes and unkempt beard； and clad in a richly embroidered robe
standing before her。 She let fall her mirror； and uttered a cry of fright。
Paphnutius stood motionless； and seeing how beautiful she was； he
murmured this prayer from the bottom of his heart
〃Grant； my God； that the face of this woman may not be a temptation；
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but may prove salutary to Thy servant。〃
Then； forcing himself to speak； he said
〃Thais； I live in a far country； and the fame of thy beauty has led me to
thee。 It is said that thou art the most clever of actresses and the most
irresistible of women。 That which is related of thy riches and thy love
affairs seems fabulous； and calls to mind the old story of Rhodope； whose
marvellous history is known by heart to all the boatmen on the Nile。
Therefore I was seized with a desire to know thee； and I see that the truth
surpasses the rumour。 Thou art a thousand times more clever and more
beautiful than is reported。 And now that I see thee； I say to myself； 'It is
impossible to approach her without staggering like a drunken man。' 〃
The words were feigned； but the monk； animated by pious zeal； uttered
them with real warmth。 Thais gazed； without displeasure； at this strange
being who had frightened her。 The rough； wild aspect； and the fiery
glances of his eyes； astonished her。 She was curious to learn the state of
life of a man so different from all others she had met。 She replied； with
gentle raillery
〃You seem prompt to admire； stranger。 Beware that my looks do not
consume you to the bones！ Beware of loving me！〃
He said
〃I love thee； O Thais！ I love thee more than my life； and more than
myself。 For thee I have quitted the desert； for thee my lipsvowed to
silencehave pronounced profane words； for thee I have seen what I ought
not to have seen； and heard what it was forbidden to me to hear； for thee
my soul is troubled； my heart is open； and the thoughts gush out like the
running springs at which the pigeons drink； for thee I have walked day and
night across sandy deserts teeming with reptiles and vampires； for thee I
have placed my bare foot on vipers and scorpions！ Yes； I love thee！ I love
thee； but not like those men who； burning with the lusts of the flesh； come
to thee like devouring wolves or furious bulls。 Thou art dear to them as is
the gazelle to the lion。 Their ravening lusts will consume thee to the soul；
O woman！ I love thee in spirit and in truth； I love thee in God； and for ever
and ever； that which is in my breast is named true zeal and divine charity。 I
promise thee better things than drunkenness crowned with flowers or the
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dreams of a brief night。 I promise thee holy feasts and celestial suppers。
The happiness that I bring thee will never end； it is unheard…of； it is
ineffable； and such that if the happy of this world could only see a shadow
of it they would die of wonder。〃
Thais laughed mischievously。
〃Friend；〃 she said； 〃show me this wonderful love。 Make haste！ Long
speeches would be an insult to my beauty； let us not lose a moment。 I am
impatient to taste the felicity you announce； but； to say the truth； I fear that
I shall always remain ignorant of it； and that all you have promised me
will vanish in words。 It is easier to promise a great happiness than to give
it。 Everyone has a talent of some sort。 I fancy that yours is to make long
speeches。 You speak of an unkno
