the dust-第7部分

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ny　things。〃

〃Yet　you　say　you　love！〃

〃Clayton　is　as　good　as　any　you're　likely　to　run　acrossis　better　than　SOME　I've　seen　about。〃

〃How　can　YOU　say？〃　cried　she。　　〃It's　for　me　to　judge。〃

〃If　you　would　only　JUDGE！〃

Ursula　sighed。　　〃It's　useless　to　talk　to　you。　　Let's　go　down。〃

Norman；　following　her　from　the　room；　stopped　her　in　the　doorway　to　give　her　a　brotherly　hug　and　kiss。　〃You　won't　make　an　out…and…out　idiot　of　yourself；　will　you；　Ursula？〃　he　said；　in　his　winning　manner。

The　expression　of　her　eyes　as　she　looked　at　him　showed　how　strong　was　his　influence　over　her。　　〃You　know　I'll　come　to　you　for　advice　before　I　do　anything　final；〃　said　she。　　〃Oh；　I　don't　know　what　I　want！　　I　only　know　what　I　don't　want。　　I　wish　I　were　well　balancedas　you　are；　Fred。〃



III


THE　brother　and　sister　dined　alone。　　Clayton　was；　finding　his　club　a　more　comfortable　place　than　his　home；　in　those　days　of　his　wife's　disillusionment　and　hesitation　about　the　future。　　Many　weak　creatures　are　curiously　armed　for　the　unequal　conflict　of　existence　some　with　fleetness　of　foot；　some　with　a　pole…cat　weapon　of　malignance；　some　with　porcupine　quills；　some　with　a　'possumlike　instinct　for　〃playing　dead。〃　　Of　these　last　was　Fitzhugh。　　He　knew　when　to　be　silent；　when　to　keep　out　of　the　way；　when　to　〃sit　tight〃　and　wait。　His　wife　had　discovered　that　he　was　a　foolthat　he　perhaps　owed　more　to　his　tailor　than　to　any　other　single　factor　for　the　success　of　his　splendid　pose　of　the　thorough　gentleman。　　Yet　she　did　not　realize　what　an　utter　fool　he　was；　so　clever　had　he　been　in　the　use　of　the　art　of　discreet　silence。　　Norman　suspected　him；　but　could　not　believe　a　human　being　capable　of　such　fathomless　vacuity　as　he　found　whenever　he　tried　to　explore　his　brother…in…law's　brain。

After　dinner　Norman　took　Ursula　to　the　opera；　to　join　the　Seldins；　and　after　the　first　act　went　to　Josephine；　who　had　come　with　only　a　deaf　old　aunt。　Josephine　loved　music；　and　to　hear　an　opera　from　a　box　one　must　be　alone。　　Norman　entered　as　the　lights　went　up。　　It　always　gave　him　a　feeling　of　dilation；　this　spectacle　of　material　splendorthe　women；　whose　part　it　is　throughout　civilization　to…day　to　wear　for　public　admiration　and　envy　the　evidences　of　the　prowess　of　the　males　to　whom　they　belong。　　A　truer　version　of　Dr。　Holmes's　aphorism　would　be　that　it　takes　several　generations　in　oil　to　make　a　deep…dyed　snobwholly　to　destroy　a　man's　or　a　woman's　point　of　view；　sense　of　the　kinship　of　all　flesh；　and　to　make　him　or　her　over　into　the　genuine　believer　in　caste　and　worshiper　of　it。　For　all　his　keenness　of　mind；　of　humor；　Norman　had　the　fast…dyed　snobbishness　of　his　family　and　friends。　　He　knew　that　caste　was　silly；　that　such　displays　as　this　vulgar　flaunting　of　jewels　and　costly　dresses　were　in　atrocious　bad　taste。　　But　it　is　one　thing　to　know；　another　thing　to　feel；　and　his　feeling　was　delight　in　the　spectacle；　pride　in　his　own　high　rank　in　the　aristocracy。

His　eyes　rested　with　radiant　pleasure　on　the　girl　he　was　to　marry。　　And　she　was　indeed　a　person　to　appeal　to　the　passion　of　pride。　　Simply　and　most　expensively　dressed　in　pearl　satin；　with　only　a　little　jewelry；　she　sat　in　the　front　of　her　parterre　box；　a　queen　by　right　of　her　father's　wealth；　her　family's　position；　her　own　beauty。　　She　was　a　large　womantall；　a　big　frame　but　not　ungainly。　　She　had　brilliant　dark　eyes；　a　small　proud　head　set　upon　shoulders　that　were　slenderly　young　now　and；　even　when　they　should　became　matronly；　would　still　be　beautiful。　　She　had　good　teeth；　an　exquisite　smile；　the　gentle　good　humor　of　those　who；　comfortable　themselves；　would　not　have　the　slightest　objection　to　all　others　being　equally　so。　　Because　she　laughed　appreciatively　and　repeated　amusingly　she　had　great　reputation　for　wit。　　Because　she　industriously　picked　up　from　men　a　plausible　smatter　of　small　talk　about　politics；　religion；　art　and　the　like；　she　was　renowned　as　clever　verging　on　profound。　　And　she　believed　herself　both　witty　and　wiseas　do　thousands；　male　and　female；　with　far　less　excuse。

She　had　selected　Norman　for　the　same　reason　that　he　had　selected　her；　each　recognized　the　other　as　the　〃grand　prize。〃　　Pity　is　not　nearly　so　close　kin　to　love　as　is　the　feeling　that　the　other　person　satisfies　to　the　uttermost　all　one's　pet　vanities。　　It　would　have　been　next　door　to　impossible　for　two　people　so　well　matched　not　to　find　themselves　drawn　to　each　other　and　filled　with　sympathy　and　the　sense　of　comradeship；　so　far　as　there　can　be　comradeship　where　two　are　driving　luxuriously　along　the　way　of　life；　with　not　a　serious　cause　for　worry。　　People　without　half　the　general　fitness　of　these　two　for　each　other　have　gone　through　to　the　end；　regarding　themselves　and　regarded　as　the　most　devoted　of　lovers。　　Indeed；　they　were　lovers。　　Only　one　of　those　savage　tests；　to　which　in　all　probability　they　would　never　be　exposed；　would　or　could　reveal　just　how　much；　or　how　little；　that　vague；　variable　word　lovers　meant　when　applied　to　them。

As　their　eyes　met；　into　each　pair　leaped　the　fine；　exalted　light　of　pride　in　possession。　　〃This　wonderful　woman　is　mine！〃　his　eyes　said。　　And　her　eyes　answered；　〃And　youyou　most　wonderful　of　menyou　are　mine！〃　　It　always　gave　each　of　them　a　thrill　like　intoxication　to　meet；　after　a　day's　separation。　　All　the　joy　of　their　dazzling　good　fortune　burst　upon　them　afresh。

〃I'll　venture　you　haven't　thought　of　me　the　whole　day；〃　said　she　as　he　dropped　to　the　chair　behind　her。

It　was　a　remark　she　often　madeto　give　him　the　opportunity　to　say；　〃I've　thought　of　little　else；　I'm　sorry　to　sayI；　who　have　a　career　to　look　after。〃　　He

made　the　usual　answer；　and　they　smiled　happily　at　each　other。　　〃And　you？〃　he　said。

〃Oh；　I？　　What　else　has　a　woman　to　think　about？〃

Her　statement　was　as　true　as　his　was　false。　　He　was　indeed　all　she　had　to　think　aboutall　worth　wasting　the　effort　of　thought　upon。　　But　hethough　he　did　not　realize　ithad　thought　of　her　only　in　the　incidental　way　in　which　an　ambition…possessed　man　must　force　himself　to　think　of　a　woman。　　The　best　of　his　mind　was　commandeered　to　his　career。　　An　amiable　but　shakily　founded　theory　that　it　was　〃our〃　career　enabled　him　to　say　without　sense　of　lying　that　his　chief　thought　had　been　she。

〃How　those　men　down　town　would　poke　fun　at　you；〃　said　she；　〃if　they　knew　you　had　me　with　you　all　the　time；　right　beside　you。〃

This　amused　him。　　〃Still；　I　suspect　there　are　lots　of　men　who'd　be　exposed　in　the　same　way　if　there　were　a　general　and　complete　show…down。〃

〃Sometimes　I　wish　I　really　were　with　youworking　with　youhelping　you。　　You　have　girlsa　girlto　be　your　secretaryor　whatever　you　call　itdon't　you？〃

〃You　should　have　seen　the　one　I　had　to…day。　　But　there's　always　something　pathetic　about　every　girl　who　has　to　make　her　own　living。〃

〃Pathetic！〃　protested　Miss　Burroughs。　　〃Not　at　all。　　I　think　it's　fine。〃

〃You　wouldn't　say　that　if　you　had　tried　it。〃

〃Indeed；　I　should；〃　she　declared　with　spirit。　　〃You　men　are　entirely　too　soft　about　women。　　You　don't　realize　how　strong　they　are。　　And；　of　course；　women　don't　resist　the　temptation　to　use　their　sex　when　they　see　how　easy　it　is　to　fool　men　that　way。　　The　sad　thing　about　it　is　that　the　woman　who　gets　along　by　using　her　sex　and　by　appealing　to　the　soft…heartedness　of　men　never　learns　to　rely　on　herself。　　She's　likely　to　come　to　grief　sooner　or　later。〃

〃There's　truth　in　all　that；〃　said　Norman。　　〃Enough　to　make　it　dangerously　unjust。　　There's　so　much　lying　done　about　getting　on　that　it's　no　wonder　those　who've　never　tried　to　do　for　themselves　get　a　wholly　false　notion　of　the　situation。　　It　is　hardbitterly　hardfor　a　man　to　get　on。　　Most　men　don't。　　Most　men？　　All　but　a　mere　handful。　　And　if　those　who　do　get　on　were　to　tell　the　truththe　WHOLE　truthabout　how　they　succeeded　well；　it'd　not　make　a　pleasant　story。〃

〃But　YOU'VE　got　on；〃　retorted　the　girl。

〃So　I　have。　　And　how？〃　　Norman　smiled　with　humorous　cynicism。　　〃I'll　never　tellnot　allonly　the　parts　that　sound　well。　　And　those　parts　are　the　least　important。　　However；　let's　not　talk　about　that。　　What　I　set　out　to　say　was　that；　while　it's　hard　for　a　man　to　make　a　decent　livingunless　he　has　luckand　harder　stillmuch　harderfor　him　to　rise　to　independence〃

〃It　wasn't　so　dreadfully　hard　for　YOU；〃　interrupted　Josephine；　looking　at　him　with　proud　admiration。　　〃But　then；　you　had　a　wonderful　brain。〃

〃That　wasn't　what　did　it；〃　replied　he。　　〃And；　in　spite　of　all　my　advantagesfriendships；　education；　enough　money　to　tide　me　over　the　beginningsin　spite　of　all　that；　I　had　a　frightful　time。　　Not　the　work。　　Of　course；　I　had　to　work；　but　I　like　that。　　No；　it　was　the　the　maneuvering；　let's　call　itthe　hardening　process。〃

〃You！〃　she　exclaimed。

〃Everyone　who　succeedsin　active　life。　　You　don't　understand　the　system；　dear。　　It's　a　cutthroat　game。　It　isn't　at　all　what　the　successful　hypocrites　describe　in　their　talks　to　young　men！〃　　He　laughed。　　〃If　I　had　followed　the　‘guides　to　success；'　I'd　not　be　here。　Oh；　yes；　I've　made　terrible　sacrifices；　but〃　his　look　at　her　made　her　thrill　with　exaltation〃it　was　worth　doing。　。　。　。　　I　understand　and　sympathize　with　those　who　scorn　to　succeed。　　But　I'm　glad　I　happened　not　to　be　born　with　their　temperament；　at　least　not　with　enough　of　it　to　keep　me　down。〃

〃You're　too　hard　on　yourself；　too　generous　to　the　failures。〃

〃Oh；　I　don't　mean　the　men　who　were　too　lazy　to　do　the　work　or　too　cowardly　to　dare　thethe　unpleasant　things。　　And　I'm　not　hard　with　myselfonly　frank。　But　we　were　talking　of　the　women。　　Poor　things；　what　chance　have　they　got？　　You　scorn　them　for　using　their　sex。　　Wait　till　you're　drowning；　dear；　before　you　criticise　another　for　what　he　does　to　save　himself　when　he's　sinking　for　the　last　time。　　I　used　everything　I　had　in　making　my　fight。　　If　I　could　have　got　on　better　or　quicker　by　the　aid　of　my　sex；　I'd　have　used　that。〃

〃Don't　say　those　things；　Fred；〃　cried　Josephine；　smiling　but　half　in　earnest。

〃Why　not？　　Aren't　you　glad　I'm　here？〃

She　gave　him　a　long　look　of　passionate　love　and　lowered　her　eyes。

〃At　whatever　cost？〃

〃Yes；〃　she　said　in　a　low　voice。　　〃But　I'm　SURE　you　exaggerate。〃

〃I've　done　nothing　YOU　wouldn't　approve　ofor　find　excuses　for。　　But　that's　because　youIall　of　us　in　this　classand　in　most　other　classesha