the dust-第8部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



〃I've　done　nothing　YOU　wouldn't　approve　ofor　find　excuses　for。　　But　that's　because　youIall　of　us　in　this　classand　in　most　other　classeshave　been　trained　to　false　ideasno；　to　perverted　ideasto　a　system　of　morality　that's　twisted　to　suit　the　demands　of　practical　life。　　On　Sundays　we　go　to　a　magnificent　church　to　hear　an　expensive　preacher　and　choir；　go　in　expensive　dress　and　in　carriages；　and　we　never　laugh　at　ourselves。　　Yet　we　are　going　in　the　name　of　One　who　was　born　in　a　stable　and　who　said　that　we　must　give　everything　to　the　poor；　and　so　on。〃

〃But　I　don't　see　what　we　could　do　about　it〃　she　said　hesitatingly。

〃We　couldn't　do　anything。　　Onlydon't　you　see　my　point？the　difference　between　theory　and　practice？　Personally；　I've　no　objectionno　strong　objectionto　the　practice。　　All　I　object　to　is　the　lying　and　faking　about　it；　to　make　it　seem　to　fit　the　theory。　　But　we　were　talking　of　womenwomen　who　work。〃

〃I've　no　doubt　you're　right；〃　admitted　she。　　〃I　suppose　they　aren't　to　blame　for　using　their　sex。　　I　ought　to　be　ashamed　of　myself；　to　sneer　at　them。〃

〃As　a　matter　of　fact；　their　sex　does　few　of　them　any　good。　　The　reverse。　　You　see；　an　attractive　woman　one　who's　attractive　AS　a　womancan　skirmish　round　and　find　some　one　to　support　her。　　But　most　of　the　working　womenthose　who　keep　on　at　itdon't　find　the　man。　　They're　not　attractive；　not　even　at　the　start。　After　they've　been　at　it　a　few　years　and　lose　the　little　bloom　they　ever　hadwhy；　they've　got　to　take　their　chances　at　the　game；　precisely　like　a　man。　　Only；　they're　handicapped　by　always　hoping　that　they'll　be　able　to　quit　and　become　married　women。　　I'd　like　to　see　how　men　would　behave　if　they　could　find　or　could　imagine　any　alternative　to　‘root　hog　or　die。'　〃

〃What's　the　matter　with　you　this　evening；　Fred？　I　never　saw　you　in　such　a　bitter　mood。〃

〃We　never　happened　to　get　on　this　subject　before。〃

〃Oh；　yes；　we　have。　　And　you　always　have　scoffed　at　the　men　who　fail。〃

〃And　I　still　scoff　at　themmost　of　them。　　A　lot　of　lazy　cowards。　　Or　else；　so　bent　on　self…indulgence　petty　self…indulgencethat　they　refuse　to　make　the　small　sacrifice　to…day　for　the　sake　of　the　large　advantage　day　after　to…morrow。　　Or　else　so　stuffed　with　vanity　that　they　never　see　their　own　mistakes。　　However；　why　blame　them？　　They　were　born　that　way；　and　can't　change。　　A　man　who　has　the　equipment　of　success　and　succeeds　has　no　more　right　to　sneer　at　one　less　lucky　than　you　would　have　to　laugh　at　a　poor　girl　because　she　wasn't　dressed　as　well　as　you。〃

〃What　a　mood！　　SOMETHING　must　have　happened。〃

〃Perhaps；〃　said　he　reflectively。　　〃Possibly　that　girl　set　me　off。〃

〃What　girl？〃

〃The　one　I　told　you　about。　　The　unfortunate　little　creature　who　was　typewriting　for　me　this　afternoon。　Not　so　very　little；　either。　　A　curious　figure　she　had。　She　was　tall　yet　she　wasn't。　　She　seemed　thin；　and　when　you　looked　again；　you　saw　that　she　was　really　only　slender；　and　beautifully　shaped　throughout。〃

Miss　Burroughs　laughed。　　〃She　must　have　been　attractive。〃

〃Not　in　the　least。　　Absolutely　without　charmand　so　homelyno；　not　homelycommonplace。　　No；　that's　not　right；　either。　　She　had　a　startling　way　of　fading　and　blazing　out。　　One　moment　she　seemed　a　blankpale；　lifeless；　colorless；　a　nobody。　　The　next　minute　she　becameamazingly　different。　　Not　the　same　thing　every　time；　but　different　things。〃

Frederick　Norman　was　too　experienced　a　dealer　with　women　deliberately　to　make　the　mistakerather；　to　commit　the　breach　of　tact　and　courtesyinvolved　in　praising　one　woman　to　another。　　But　in　this　case　it　never　occurred　to　him　that　he　was　talking　to　a　woman　of　a　woman。　　Josephine　Burroughs　was　a　lady；　the　other　was　a　piece　of　office　machineryand　a　very　trivial　piece　at　that。　　But　he　saw　and　instantly　understood　the　look　in　her　eyesthe　strained　effort　to　keep　the　telltale　upper　lip　from　giving　its　prompt　and　irrepressible　signal　of　inward　agitation。

〃I'm　very　much　interested；〃　said　she。

〃Yes；　she　was　a　curiosity；〃　said　he　carelessly。

〃Has　she　been　therelong？〃　inquired　Josephine；　with　a　feigned　indifference　that　did　not　deceive　him。

〃Several　months；　I　believe。　　I　never　noticed　her　until　a　few　days　ago。　　And　until　to…day　I　had　forgotten　her。　　She's　one　of　the　kind　it's　difficult　to　remember。〃

He　fell　to　glancing　round　the　house；　pretending　to　be　unconscious　of　the　furtive　suspicion　with　which　she　was　observing　him。　　She　said：

〃She's　your　secretary　now？〃

〃Merely　a　general　office　typewriter。〃

The　curtain　went　up　for　the　second　act。　　Josephine　fixed　her　attention　on　the　stageapparently　undivided　attention。　　But　Norman　felt　rather　than　saw　that　she　was　still　worrying　about　the　〃curiosity。〃　　He　marveled　at　this　outcropping　of　jealousy。　　It　seemed　ridiculous　it　WAS　ridiculous。　　He　laughed　to　himself。　　If　she　could　see　the　girlthe　obscure；　uninteresting　cause　of　her　agitationhow　she　would　mock　at　herself！　　Then；　too；　there　was　the　absurdity　of　thinking　him　capable　of　such　a　stoop。　　A　woman　of　their　own　classor　a　woman　of　its　corresponding　class；　on　the　other　side　of　the　line　yes。　　No　doubt　she　had　heard　things　that　made　her　uneasy；　or；　at　least；　ready　to　be　uneasy。　　But　this　poorly　dressed　obscurity；　with　not　a　charm　that　could　attract　even　a　man　of　her　own　lowly　class　　It　was　such　a　good　joke　that　he　would　have　teased　Josephine　about　it　but　for　his　knowledge　of　the　worlda　knowledge　in　whose　primer　it　was　taught　that　teasing　is　both　bad　taste　and　bad　judgment。　　Also；　it　was　beneath　his　dig…　nity；　it　was　offense　to　his　vanity；　to　couple　his　name　with　the　name　of　one　so　beneath　him　that　even　the　matter　of　sex　did　not　make　the　coupling　less　intolerable。

When　the　curtain　fell　several　people　came　into　the　box；　and　he　went　to　make　a　few　calls　round　the　parterre。　He　returned　after　the　second　act。　　They　were　again　alonethe　deaf　old　aunt　did　not　count。　　At　once　Josephine　began　upon　the　same　subject。　　With　studied　indifferencehow　amusing　for　a　woman　of　her　inexperience　to　try　to　fool　a　man　of　his　experience！she　said：

〃Tell　me　some　more　about　that　typewriter　girl。　Women　who　work　always　interest　me。〃

〃She　wouldn't；〃　said　Norman。　　The　subject　had　been　driven　clean　out　of　his　mind；　and　he　didn't　wish　to　return　to　it。　　〃Some　day　they　will　venture　to　make　judicious　long　cuts　in　Wagner's　operas；　and　then　they'll　be　interesting。　　It　always　amuses　me；　this　reverence　of　little　people　for　the　great　onesas　if　a　great　man　were　always　great。　　Nohe　IS　always　great。　　But　often　it's　in　a　dull　way。　　And　the　dull　parts　ought　to　be　skipped。〃

〃I　don't　like　the　opera　this　evening；〃　said　she。　〃What　you　said　a　while　ago　has　set　me　to　thinking。　Is　that　girl　a　lady？〃

〃She　works；〃　laughed　he。

〃But　she　might　have　been　a　lady。〃

〃I'm　sure　I　don't　know。〃

〃Don't　you　know　ANYTHING　about　her？〃

〃Except　that　she's　trustworthyand　insignificant　and　not　too　good　at　her　business。〃

〃I　shouldn't　think　you　could　afford　to　keep　incompetent　people；〃　said　the　girl　shrewdly。

〃Perhaps　they　won't　keep　her；〃　parried　Norman　gracefully。　　〃The　head　clerk　looks　after　those　things。〃

〃He　probably　likes　her。〃

〃No；〃　said　Norman；　too　indifferent　to　be　cautious。　〃She　has　no　‘gentlemen　friends。'　〃

〃How　do　you　know　that？〃　said　the　girl；　and　she　could　not　keep　a　certain　sharpness　out　of　her　voice。

〃Tetlow；　the　head　clerk；　told　me。　　I　asked　him　a　few　questions　about　her。　　I　had　some　confidential　work　to　do　and　didn't　want　to　trust　her　without　being　sure。〃

He　saw　that　she　was　now　prey　to　her　jealous　suspicion。　He　was　uncertain　whether　to　be　amused　or　irritated。　She　had　to　pause　long　and　with　visible　effort　collect　herself　before　venturing：

〃Oh；　she　does　confidential　work　for　you？　　I　thought　you　said　she　was　incompetent。〃

He；　the　expert　cross…examiner；　had　to　admire　her　skill　at　that　high　science　and　art。　　〃I　felt　sorry　for　her；〃　he　said。　　〃She　seemed　such　a　forlorn　little　creature。〃

She　laughed　with　a　constrained　attempt　at　raillery。　〃I　never　should　have　suspected　you　of　such　weakness。　To　give　confidential　things　to　a　forlorn　little　incompetent；　out　of　pity。〃

He　was　irritated；　distinctly。　　The　whole　thing　was　preposterous。　　It　reminded　him　of　feats　of　his　own　before　a　jury。　　By　clever　questioning；　Josephine　had　made　about　as　trifling　an　incident　as　could　be　imagined　take　on　really　quite　imposing　proportions。　　There　was　annoyance　in　his　smile　as　he　said：

〃Shall　I　send　her　up　to　see　you？　　You　might　find　it　amusing；　and　maybe　you　could　do　something　for　her。〃

Josephine　debated。　　〃Yes；〃　she　finally　said。　　〃I　wish　you　would　send　her〃　with　a　little　sarcasm　〃if　you　can　spare　her　for　an　hour　or　so。〃

〃Don't　make　it　longer　than　that；〃　laughed　he。　〃Everything　will　stop　while　she's　gone。〃

It　pleased　him；　in　a　way；　this　discovery　that　Josephine　had　such　a　common；　commonplace　weakness　as　jealousy。　But　it　also　took　away　something　from　his　high　esteem　for　heran　esteem　born　of　the　lover's　idealizings；　for；　while　he　was　not　of　the　kind　of　men　who　are　on　their　knees　before　women；　he　did　have　a　deep　respect　for　Josephine；　incarnation　of　all　the　material　things　that　dazzled　hima　respect　with　something　of　the　reverential　in　it；　and　something　of　awemore　than　he　would　have　admitted　to　himself。　　To…day；　as　of　old；　the　image…　makers　are　as　sincere　worshipers　as　visit　the　shrines。　In　our　prostrations　and　genuflections　in　the　temple　we　do　not　discriminate　against　the　idols　we　ourselves　have　manufactured；　on　the　contrary；　them　we　worship　with　peculiar　gusto。　　Norman　knew　his　gods　were　frauds；　that　their　divine　qualities　were　of　the　earth　earthy。　　But　he　served　them；　and　what　most　appealed　to　him　in　Josephine　was　that　she　incorporated　about　all　their　divine　qualities。

He　and　his　sister　went　home　together。　　Her　first　remark　in　the　auto　was：　　〃What　were　you　and　Josie　quarreling　about？〃

〃Quarreling？〃　inquired　he　in　honest　surprise。

〃I　looked　at　her　through　my　glasses　and　saw　that　the　was　all　upsetand　you；　too。〃

〃This　is　too　ridiculous；〃　cried　he。

〃She　lookedjealous。〃

〃Nonsense！　　What　an　imagination　you　have！〃

〃I　saw　what　I　saw；〃　Ursula　maintained。　　〃Well；　I　suppose　she　has　heard　somethingsomething　recent。　I　thought　you　had　sworn　off；　Fred。　　But　I　might　have　known。〃

Norman　was　angry。　　He　wondered　at　his　own　exasperation；　out　of　a