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THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIES



When the Himalayan peasant meets the he…bear in his pride;

He shouts to scare the monster; who will often turn aside;

But the she…bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail;

For the female of the species is more deadly than the male。



When Nag; the wayside cobra; hears the careless foot of man;

He will sometimes wriggle sideways and avoid it if he can;

But his mate makes no such motion where she camps beside the trail;

For the female of the species is more deadly than the male。



When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws;

They prayed to be delivered from the vengeance of the squaws。

'Twas the women; not the warriors; turned those stark enthusiasts pale;

For the female of the species is more deadly than the male。



Man's timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say;

For the Woman that God gave him isn't his to give away;

But when hunter meets with husband; each confirms the other's tale …

The female of the species is more deadly than the male。



Man; a bear in most relations … worm and savage otherwise; …

Man propounds negotiations; Man accepts the compromise。

Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact

To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act。



Fear; or foolishness; impels him; ere he lay the wicked low;

To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe。

Mirth obscene diverts his anger … Doubt and Pity oft perplex

Him in dealing with an issue … to the scandal of The Sex!



But the Woman that God gave him; every fibre of her frame

Proves her launched for one sole issue; armed and engined for the same;

And to serve that single issue; lest the generations fail;

The female of the species must be deadlier than the male。



She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast

May not deal in doubt or pity … must not swerve for fact or jest。

These be purely male diversions … not in these her honor dwells。

She; the Other Law we live by; is that Law and nothing else。



She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great

As the Mother of the Infant and the Mistress of the Mate;

And when Babe and Man are lacking and she strides unclaimed to claim

Her right as femme (and baron); her equipment is the same。



She is wedded to convictions … in default of grosser ties;

Her contentions are her children; Heaven help him who denies! …

He will meet no cool discussion; but the instant; white…hot; wild;

Wakened female of the species warring as for spouse and child。



Unprovoked and awful charges … even so the she…bear fights;

Speech that drips; corrodes; and poisons … even so the cobra bites;

Scientific vivisection of one nerve till it is raw

And the victim writhes in anguish … like the Jesuit with the squaw!



So it comes that Man; the coward; when he gathers to confer

With his fellow…braves in council; dare not leave a place for her

Where; at war with Life and Conscience; he uplifts his erring hands

To some God of Abstract Justice … which no woman understands。



And Man knows it!  Knows; moreover; that the Woman that God gave him

Must command but may not govern … shall enthral but not enslave him。 

And She knows; because She warns him; and Her instincts never fail;

That the Female of Her Species is more deadly than the Male。



Rudyard Kipling '1865…1936'





THE WOMAN WITH THE SERPENT'S TONGUE



She is not old; she is not young;

The woman with the Serpent's Tongue;

The haggard cheek; the hungering eye;

The poisoned words that wildly fly;

The famished face; the fevered hand; …

Who slights the worthiest in the land;

Sneers at the just; contemns the brave;

And blackens goodness in its grave。



In truthful numbers be she sung;

The Woman with the Serpent's Tongue;

Concerning whom; Fame hints at things

Told but in shrugs and whisperings:

Ambitious from her natal hour;

And scheming all her life for power;

With little left of seemly pride;

With venomed fangs she cannot hide;

Who half makes love to you to…day;



To…morrow gives her guest away。

Burnt up within by that strange soul

She cannot slake; or yet control:

Malignant…lipped; unkind; unsweet;

Past all example indiscreet;

Hectic; and always overstrung; …

The Woman with the Serpent's Tongue。



To think that such as she can mar

Names that among the noblest are!

That hands like hers can touch the springs

That move who knows what men and things?

That on her will their fates have hung! …

The Woman with the Serpent's Tongue。



William Watson '1858…1935'





SUPPOSE



How sad if; by some strange new law;

All kisses scarred!

For she who is most beautiful

Would be most marred。



And we might be surprised to see

Some lovely wife

Smooth…visaged; while a seeming prude

Was marked for life。



Anne Reeve Aldrich '1866…1892'





TOO CANDID BY HALF



As Tom and his wife were discoursing one day

Of their several faults in a bantering way;

Said she; 〃Though my wit you disparage;

I'm sure; my dear husband; our friends will attest

This much; at the least; that my judgment is best。〃

Quoth Tom; 〃So they said at our marriage。〃



John Godfrey Saxe '1816…1887'





FABLE



The mountain and the squirrel

Had a quarrel;

And the former called the latter 〃Little Prig;〃

Bun replied;

〃You are doubtless very big;

But all sorts of things and weather

Must be taken in together;

To make up a year

And a sphere。

And I think it no disgrace

To occupy my place。

If I'm not so large as you;

You are not so small as I;

And not half so spry。 



I'll not deny you make

A very pretty squirrel track;

Talents differ; all is well and wisely put;

If I cannot carry forests on thy back;

Neither can you crack a nut。



Ralph Waldo Emerson '1803…1882'





WOMAN'S WILL



That man's a fool who tries by art and skill

To stem the torrent of a woman's will:

For if she will; she will; you may depend on't …

And if she won't; she won't … and there's an end on't。



Unknown





WOMAN'S WILL



Men; dying; make their wills; but wives

Escape a task so sad;

Why should they make what all their lives

The gentle dames have had?



John Godfrey Saxe '1816…1887'





PLAYS



Alas; how soon the hours are over

Counted us out to play the lover!

And how much narrower is the stage

Allotted us to play the sage!



But when we play the fool; how wide

The theatre expands! beside;

How long the audience sits before us!

How many prompters! what a chorus!



Walter Savage Landor '1775…1864'





THE REMEDY WORSE THAN THE DISEASE



I sent for Ratcliffe; was so ill;

That other doctors gave me over:

He felt my pulse; prescribed his pill;

And I was likely to recover。



But; when the wit began to wheeze;

And wine had warmed the politician;

Cured yesterday of my disease;

I died last night of my physician。



Matthew Prior '1664…1721'





THE NET OF LAW



The net of law is spread so wide;

No sinner from its sweep may hide。



Its meshes are so fine and strong;

They take in every child of wrong。



O wondrous web of mystery!

Big fish alone escape from thee!



James Jeffrey Roche '1847…1908'





COLOGNE



In Koln; a town of monks and bones;

And pavements fanged with murderous stones;

And rags; and hags; and hideous wenches;

I counted two and seventy stenches;

All well defined; and several stinks!

Ye Nymphs that reign o'er sewers and sinks;

The river Rhine; it is well known;

Doth wash your city of Cologne;

But tell me; Nymphs! what power divine

Shall henceforth wash the river Rhine?



Samuel Taylor Coleridge '1772…1834'





EPITAPH ON CHARLES II



Here lies our Sovereign Lord the King;

Whose word no man relies on;

Who never said a foolish thing;

Nor ever did a wise one。



John Wilmot '1647…1680'





CERTAIN MAXIMS OF HAFIZ



I

If It be pleasant to look on; stalled in the packed serai;

Does not the Young Man try Its temper and pace ere he buy?

If She be pleasant to look on; what does the Young Man say?

〃Lo!  She is pleasant to look on; give Her to me today!〃



II

Yea; though a Kaffir die; to him is remitted Jehannum

If he borrowed in life from a native at sixty per cent per annum。



III

Blister we not for bursati?  So when the heart is vexed;

The pain of one maiden's refusal is drowned in the pain of the next。



IV

The temper of chums; the love of your wife; and a new piano's tune …

Which of the three will you trust at the end of an Indian June?



V

Who are the rulers of Ind … to whom shall we bow the knee?

Make your peace with the women; and men will make you L。 G。



VI

Does the woodpecker flit round the young ferash?

Does the grass clothe a new…built wall?

Is she under thirty; the woman who holds a boy in her thrall?



VI

If She grow suddenly gracious … reflect。 Is it all for thee?

The black…buck is stalked through the bullock; and Man through jealousy。



VIII

Seek not for favor of women。  So shall you find it indeed。

Does not the boar break cover just when you're lighting a weed?



IX

If He play; being young and unskilful; for shekels of silver and gold;

Take His money; my son; praising Allah。  The kid was ordained to be sold。



X

With a 〃weed〃 among men or horses verily this is the best;

That you work him in office or dog…cart lightly … but give him no rest。



XI

Pleasant the snaffle of Courtship; improving the manners and carriage;

But the colt who is wise will abstain from the terrible thornbit

  of Marriage。



XII

As the thriftless gold of the babul; so is the gold that we spend

On a Derby Sweep; or our neighbor's wife; or the horse that we buy

  from a friend。



XIII

The ways of a man with a maid be strange; yet simple and tame

To the ways of a man with a horse; when 

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