生命不能承受之轻-第24部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


Looking　at　her　body　speckled　with　droplets　of　shower　water；　she　imagined　the　engineer　dropping　in　at　the　bar。　Oh；　how　she　longed　for　him　to　come；　longed　for　him　to　invite　her　back！　Oh；　how　she　yearned　for　it！

23
Every　day　she　feared　that　the　engineer　would　make　his　appearance　and　she　would　be　unable　to　say　no。　But　the　days　passed；　and　the　fear　that　he　would　come　merged　gradually　into　the　dread　that　he　would　not。
A　month　had　gone　by；　and　still　the　engineer　stayed　away。　Tereza　found　it　inexplicable。　Her　frustrated　desire　receded　and　turned　into　a　troublesome　question：　Why　did　he　fail　to　come？
Waiting　on　customers　one　day；　she　came　upon　the　bald…headed　man　who　had　attacked　her　for　serving　alcohol　to　a　minor。　He　was　telling　a　dirty　joke　in　a　loud　voice。　It　was　a　joke　she　had　heard　a　hundred　times　before　from　the　drunks　in　the　small　town　where　she　had　once　served　beer。　Once　more；　she　had　the　feeling　that　her　mother's　world　was　intruding　on　her。　She　curtly　interrupted　the　bald　man。
I　don't　take　orders　from　you；　the　man　responded　in　a　huff。　You　ought　to　thank　your　lucky　stars　we　let　you　stay　here　in　the　bar。　
We？　Who　do　you　mean　by　we？　
Us；　said　the　man；　holding　up　his　glass　for　another　vodka。　I　won't　have　any　more　insults　out　of　you；　is　that　clear？　Oh；　and　by　the　way；　he　added；　pointing　to　Tereza's　neck；　which　was　wound　round　with　a　strand　of　cheap　pearls；　where　did　you　get　those　from？　You　can't　tell　me　your　husband　gave　them　to　you。　A　window　washer！　He　can't　afford　gifts　like　that。　It's　your　customers；　isn't　it？　I　wonder　what　you　give　them　in　exchange？　
You　shut　your　mouth　this　instant！　she　hissed。
Just　remember　that　prostitution　is　a　criminal　offense；　he　went　on；　trying　to　grab　hold　of　the　necklace。
Suddenly　Karenin　jumped　up；　leaned　his　front　paws　on　the　bar；　and　began　to　snarl。

24
The　ambassador　said：　He's　with　the　secret　police。　
Then　why　is　he　so　open　about　it？　What　good　is　a　secret　police　that　can't　keep　its　secrets？　
The　ambassador　positioned　himself　on　the　cot　by　folding　his　legs　under　his　body；　as　he　had　learned　to　do　in　yoga　class。　Kennedy；　beaming　down　on　him　from　the　frame　on　the　wall；　gave　his　words　a　special　consecration。
The　secret　police　have　several　functions；　my　dear；　he　began　in　an　avuncular　tone。　The　first　is　the　classical　one。　They　keep　an　ear　out　for　what　people　are　saying　and　report　it　to　their　superiors。
The　second　function　is　intimidatory。　They　want　to　make　it　seem　as　if　they　have　us　in　their　power；　they　want　us　to　be　afraid。　That　is　what　your　bald…headed　friend　was　after。
The　third　function　consists　of　staging　situations　that　will　compromise　us。　Gone　are　the　days　when　they　tried　to　accuse　us　of　plotting　the　downfall　of　the　state。　That　would　only　increase　our　popularity。　Now　they　slip　hashish　in　our　pockets　or　claim　we've　raped　a　twelve…year…old　girl。　They　can　always　dig　up　some　girl　to　back　them。　
The　engineer　immediately　popped　back　into　Tereza's　mind。　Why　had　he　never　come？
They　need　to　trap　people；　the　ambassador　went　on；　to　force　them　to　collaborate　and　set　other　traps　for　other　people；　so　that　gradually　they　can　turn　the　whole　nation　into　a　single　organization　of　informers。　
Tereza　could　think　of　nothing　but　the　possibility　that　the　engineer　had　been　sent　by　the　police。　And　who　was　that　strange　boy　who　drank　himself　silly　and　told　her　he　loved　her？　It　was　because　of　him　that　the　bald　police　spy　had　launched　into　her　and　the　engineer　stood　up　for　her。　So　all　three　had　been　playing　parts　in　a　prearranged　scenario　meant　to　soften　her　up　for　the　seduction！
How　could　she　have　missed　it？　The　flat　was　so　odd；　and　he　didn't　belong　there　at　all！　Why　would　an　elegantly　dressed　engineer　live　in　a　miserable　place　like　that？　Was　he　an　engineer？　And　if　so；　how　could　he　leave　work　at　two　in　the　afternoon？　Besides；　how　many　engineers　read　Sophocles？　No；　that　was　no　engineer's　library！　The　whole　place　had　more　the　flavor　of　a　flat　confiscated　from　a　poor　imprisoned　intellectual。　Her　father　was　put　in　prison　when　she　was　ten；　and　the　state　had　confiscated　their　flat　and　all　her　father's　books。　Who　knows　to　what　use　the　flat　had　then　been　put？
Now　she　saw　clearly　why　the　engineer　had　never　returned：　he　had　accomplished　his　mission。　What　mission？　The　drunken　undercover　agent　had　inadvertently　given　it　away　when　he　said；　Just　remember　that　prostitution　is　a　criminal　offense。　Now　that　self…styled　engineer　would　testify　that　she　had　slept　with　him　and　demanded　to　be　paid！　They　would　threaten　to　blow　it　up　into　a　scandal　unless　she　agreed　to　report　on　the　people　who　got　drunk　in　her　bar。
Don't　worry；　the　ambassador　comforted　her。　Your　story　doesn't　sound　the　least　bit　dangerous。　
I　suppose　it　doesn't；　she　said　in　a　tight　voice；　as　she　walked　out　into　the　Prague　night　with　Karenin。

25
People　usually　escape　from　their　troubles　into　the　future；　they　draw　an　imaginary　line　across　the　path　of　time；　a　line　beyond　which　their　current　troubles　will　cease　to　exist。　But　Tereza　saw　no　such　line　in　her　future。　Only　looking　back　could　bring　her　consolation。　It　was　Sunday　again。　They　got　into　the　car　and　drove　far　beyond　the　limits　of　Prague。
Tomas　was　at　the　wheel；　Tereza　next　to　him；　and　Karenin　in　the　back；　occasionally　leaning　over　to　lick　their　ears。　After　two　hours；　they　came　to　a　small　town　known　for　its　spa　where　they　had　been　for　several　days　six　years　earlier。　They　wanted　to　spend　the　night　there。
They　pulled　into　the　square　and　got　out　of　the　car。　Nothing　had　changed。　They　stood　facing　the　hotel　they　had　stayed　at。　The　same　old　linden　trees　rose　up　before　it。　Off　to　the　left　ran　an　old　wooden　colonnade　culminating　in　a　stream　spouting　its　medicinal　water　into　a　marble　bowl。　People　were　bending　over　it；　the　same　small　glasses　in　hand。
When　Tomas　looked　back　at　the　hotel；　he　noticed　that　something　had　in　fact　changed。　What　had　once　been　the　Grand　now　bore　the　name　Baikal。　He　looked　at　the　street　sign　on　the　corner　of　the　building：　Moscow　Square。　Then　they　took　a　walk　（Karenin　tagged　along　on　his　own；　without　a　leash）　through　all　the　streets　they　had　known；　and　examined　all　their　names：　Stalingrad　Street；　Leningrad　Street；　Rostov　Street；　Novosibirsk　Street；　Kiev　Street；　Odessa　Street。　There　was　a　Tchaikovsky　Sanatorium；　a　Tolstoy　Sanatorium；　a　Rimsky…Korsakov　Sanatorium；　there　was　a　Hotel　Suvorov；　a　Gorky　Cinema；　and　a　Cafe　Pushkin。　All　the　names　were　taken　from　Russian　geography；　from　Russian　history。
Tereza　suddenly　recalled　the　first　days　of　the　invasion。　People　in　every　city　and　town　had　pulled　down　the　street　signs；　sign　posts　had　disappeared。　Overnight；　the　country　had　become　nameless。　For　seven　days；　Russian　troops　wandered　the　countryside；　not　knowing　where　they　were。　The　officers　searched　for　newspaper　offices；　for　television　and　radio　stations　to　occupy；　but　could　not　find　them。　Whenever　they　asked；　they　would　get　either　a　shrug　of　the　shoulders　or　false　names　and　directions。
Hindsight　now　made　that　anonymity　seem　quite　dangerous　to　the　country。　The　streets　and　buildings　could　no　longer　return　to　their　original　names。　As　a　result；　a　Czech　spa　had　suddenly　metamorphosed　into　a　miniature　imaginary　Russia；　and　the　past　that　Tereza　had　gone　there　to　find　had　turned　out　to　be　confiscated。　It　would　be　impossible　for　them　to　spend　the　night。
26
They　started　back　to　the　car　in　silence。　She　was　thinking　about　how　all　things　and　people　seemed　to　go　about　in　disguise。　An　old　Czech　town　was　covered　with　Russian　names。　Czechs　taking　pictures　of　the　invasion　had　unconsciously　worked　for　the　secret　police。　The　man　who　sent　her　to　die　had　worn　a　mask　of　Tomas's　face　over　his　own。　The　spy　played　the　part　of　an　engineer；　and　the　engineer　tried　to　play　the　part　of　the　man　from　Petrin。　The　emblem　of　the　book　in　his　flat　proved　a　sham　designed　to　lead　her　astray。
Recalling　the　book　she　had　held　in　her　hand　there；　she　had　a　sudden　flash　of　insight　that　made　her　cheeks　burn　red。　What　had　been　the　sequence　of　events？　The　engineer　announced　he　would　bring　in　some　coffee。　She　walked　over　to　the　bookshelves　and　took　down　Sophocles'　Oedipus。　Then　the　engineer　came　back。　But　without　the　coffee！
Again　and　again　she　returned　to　that　situation：　How　long　was　he　away　when　he　went　for　the　coffee？　Surely　a　minute　at　the　least。　Maybe　two　or　even　three。　And　what　had　he　been　up　to　for　so　long　in　that　miniature　anteroom？　Or　had　he　gone　to　the　toilet？　She　tried　to　remember　hearing　the　door　shut　or　the　water　flush。　No；　she　was　positive　she'd　heard　no　water；　she　would　have　remembered　that。　And　she　was　almost　certain　the　door　hadn't　closed。　What　had　he　been　up　to　in　that　anteroom？
It　was　only　too　clear。　If　they　meant　to　trap　her；　they　would　need　more　than　the　engineer's　testimony。　They　would　need　incontrovertible　evidence。　In　the　course　of　his　suspiciously　long　absence；　the　engineer　could　only　have　been　setting　up　a　movie　camera　in　the　anteroom。　Or；　more　likely；　he　had　let　in　someone　with　a　still　camera；　who　then　had　photographed　them　from　behind　the　curtain。
Only　a　few　weeks　earlier；　she　had　scoffed　at　Prochazka　for　failing　to　see　that　he　lived　in　a　concentration　camp；　where　privacy　ceased　to　exist。　But　what　about　her？　By　getting　out　from　under　her　mother's　roof；　she　thought　in　all　innocence　that　she　had　once　and　for　all　become　master　of　her　privacy。　But　no；　her　mother's　roof　stretched　out　over　the　whole　world　and　would　never　let　her　be。　Tereza　would　never　escape　her。
As　they　walked　down　the　garden…lined　steps　leading　back　to　the　square；　Tomas　asked　her；　What's　wrong？　
Before　she　could　respond；　someone　called　out　a　greeting　to　Tomas。

27
He　was　a　man　of　about　fifty　with　a　weather…beaten　face；　a　farm　worker　whom　Tomas　had　once　operated　on　and　who　was　sent　to　the　spa　once　a　year　for　treatment。　He　invited　Tomas　and　Tereza　to　have　a　glass　of　wine　with　him。　Since　the　law　prohibited　dogs　from　entering　public　places；　Tereza　took　Karenin　back　to　the　car　while　the　men　found　a　table　at　a　nearby　cafe。　When　she　came　up　to　them；　the　man　was　saying；　We　live　a　quiet　life。　Two　years　ago　they　even　elected　me　chairman　of　the　collective。　Congratulations；　said　Tomas。
You　know　how　it　is。　People　are　dying　to　move　to　the　city。　The　big　shots；　they're　happy　when　somebody　wants　to　stay　put。　They　can't　fire　us　from　our　jobs。　
It　would　be　ideal　for　us；　said