the expedition of humphry clinker-第11部分

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they　must　needs　have　butter；　let　them　make　it　of　sheep's　milk；
but　then　my　wool　will　suffer　for　want　of　grace；　so　that　I　must　be
a　loser　on　all　sides。　Well；　patience　is　like　a　stout　Welsh　poney；
it　bears　a　great　deal；　and　trots　a　great　way；　but　it　will　tire　at
the　long　run。　Before　its　long；　perhaps　I　may　shew　Matt；　that　I
was　not　born　to　be　the　household　drudge　to　my　dying　day　　Gwyn
rites　from　Crickhowel；　that　the　price　of　flannel　is　fallen　three…
farthings　an　ell；　and　that's　another　good　penny　out　of　my　pocket。
When　I　go　to　market　to　sell；　my　commodity　stinks；　but　when　I　want
to　buy　the　commonest　thing；　the　owner　pricks　it　up　under　my　nose；
and　it　can't　be　had　for　love　nor　money　　I　think　everything　runs
cross　at　Brambleton…hall　　You　say　the　gander　has　broke　the　eggs；
which　is　a　phinumenon　I　don't　understand：　for　when　the　fox
carried　off　the　old　goose　last　year；　he　took　her　place；　and
hatched　the　eggs；　and　partected　the　goslings　like　a　tender
parent　　Then　you　tell　me　the　thunder　has　soured　two　barrels　of
beer　in　the　seller。　But　how　the　thunder　should　get　there；　when
the　seller　was　double…locked；　I　can't　comprehend。　Howsomever；　I
won't　have　the　beer　thrown　out；　till　I　see　it　with　my　own　eyes。
Perhaps；　it　will　recover　　At　least　it　will　serve　for　vinegar　to
the　servants。　　You　may　leave　off　the　fires　in　my　brother's
chamber　and　mine；　as　it　is　unsartain　when　we　return。　　I　hope；
Gwyllim；　you'll　take　care　there　is　no　waste；　and　have　an　eye　to
the　maids；　and　keep　them　to　their　spinning。　I　think　they　may　go
very　well　without　beer　in　hot　weather　　it　serves　only　to　inflame
the　blood；　and　set　them　a…gog　after　the　men。　Water　will　make　them
fair　and　keep　them　cool　and　tamperit。　Don't　forget　to　put　up　in
the　portmantel；　that　cums　with　Williams；　along　with　my　riding…habit；
hat；　and　feather；　the　viol　of　purl　water；　and　the　tincktur
for　my　stomach；　being　as　how　I　am　much　troubled　with
flutterencies。　This　is　all　at　present；　from

Yours；
TABITHA　BRAMBLE
BATH；　April　26。



To　Dr　LEWIS。

DEAR　DICK；

I　have　done　with　the　waters；　therefore　your　advice　comes　a　day
too　late　I　grant　that　physic　is　no　mystery　of　your　making。　I　know
it　is　a　mystery　in　its　own　nature；　and；　like　other　mysteries；
requires　a　strong　gulp　of　faith　to　make　it　go　down　　Two　days　ago；
I　went　into　the　King's　Bath；　by　the　advice　of　our　friend
Ch；　in　order　to　clear　the　strainer　of　the　skin；　for　the　benefit
of　a　free　perspiration；　and　the　first　object　that　saluted　my　eye；
was　a　child　full　of　scrophulous　ulcers；　carried　in　the　arms　of
one　of　the　guides；　under　the　very　noses　of　the　bathers。　I　was　so
shocked　at　the　sight；　that　I　retired　immediately　with　indignation
and　disgust　　Suppose　the　matter　of　those　ulcers；　floating　on　the
water；　comes　in　contact　with　my　skin；　when　the　pores　are　all
open；　I　would　ask　you　what　must　be　the　consequence？　　Good
Heaven；　the　very　thought　makes　my　blood　run　cold！　we　know　not
what　sores　may　be　running　into　the　water　while　we　are　bathing；
and　what　sort　of　matter　we　may　thus　imbibe；　the　king's…evil；　the
scurvy；　the　cancer；　and　the　pox；　and；　no　doubt；　the　heat　will
render　the　virus　the　more　volatile　and　penetrating。　To　purify
myself　from　all　such　contamination；　I　went　to　the　duke　of
Kingston's　private　Bath；　and　there　I　was　almost　suffocated　for
want　of　free　air；　the　place　was　so　small；　and　the　steam　so
stifling。

After　all；　if　the　intention　is　no　more　than　to　wash　the　skin；　I
am　convinced　that　simple　element　is　more　effectual　than　any　water
impregnated　with　salt　and　iron；　which；　being　astringent；　will
certainly　contract　the　pores；　and　leave　a　kind　of　crust　upon　the
surface　of　the　body。　But　I　am　now　as　much　afraid　of　drinking；　as
of　bathing；　for；　after　a　long　conversation　with　the　Doctor；　about
the　construction　of　the　pump　and　the　cistern；　it　is　very　far　from
being　clear　with　me；　that　the　patients　in　the　Pump…room　don't
swallow　the　scourings　of　the　bathers。　I　can't　help　suspecting；
that　there　is；　or　may　be；　some　regurgitation　from　the　bath　into
the　cistern　of　the　pump。　In　that　case；　what　a　delicate　beveridge
is　every　day　quaffed　by　the　drinkers；　medicated　with　the　sweat
and　dirt；　and　dandriff；　and　the　abominable　discharges　of　various
kinds；　from　twenty　different　diseased　bodies；　parboiling　in　the
kettle　below。　In　order　to　avoid　this　filthy　composition；　I　had
recourse　to　the　spring　that　supplies　the　private　baths　on　the
Abbey…green；　but　I　at　once　perceived　something　extraordinary　in
the　taste　and　smell；　and；　upon　inquiry；　I　find　that　the　Roman
baths　in　this　quarter；　were　found　covered　by　an　old　burying
ground；　belonging　to　the　Abbey；　through　which；　in　all
probability；　the　water　drains　in　its　passage；　so　that　as　we　drink
the　decoction　of　living　bodies　at　the　Pump…room；　we　swallow　the
strainings　of　rotten　bones　and　carcasses　at　the　private　bath。　I
vow　to　God；　the　very　idea　turns　my　stomach！　Determined；　as　I　am；
against　any　farther　use　of　the　Bath　waters；　this　consideration
would　give　me　little　disturbance；　if　I　could　find　any　thing　more
pure；　or　less　pernicious；　to　quench　my　thirst；　but；　although　the
natural　springs　of　excellent　water　are　seen　gushing　spontaneous
on　every　side；　from　the　hills　that　surround　us；　the　inhabitants；
in　general；　make　use　of　well…water；　so　impregnated　with　nitre；　or
alum；　or　some　other　villainous　mineral；　that　it　is　equally
ungrateful　to　the　taste；　and　mischievous　to　the　constitution。　It
must　be　owned；　indeed；　that　here；　in　Milsham…street；　we　have　a
precarious　and　scanty　supply　from　the　hill；　which　is　collected　in
an　open　bason　in　the　Circus；　liable　to　be　defiled　with　dead　dogs；
cats；　rats；　and　every　species　of　nastiness；　which　the　rascally
populace　may　throw　into　it；　from　mere　wantonness　and　brutality。
Well；　there　is　no　nation　that　drinks　so　hoggishly　as　the　English。

What　passes　for　wine　among　us；　is　not　the　juice　of　the　grape。　It
is　an　adulterous　mixture；　brewed　up　of　nauseous　ingredients；　by
dunces；　who　are　bunglers　in　the　art　of　poison…making；　and　yet　we；
and　our　forefathers；　are　and　have　been　poisoned　by　this　cursed
drench；　without　taste　or　flavour　　The　only　genuine　and　wholesome
beveridge　in　England；　is　London　porter；　and　Dorchester　table…beer；
but　as　for　your　ale　and　your　gin；　your　cyder　and　your
perry；　and　all　the　trashy　family　of　made　wines；　I　detest　them　as
infernal　compositions；　contrived　for　the　destruction　of　the　human
species　　But　what　have　I　to　do　with　the　human　species？　except　a
very　few　friends；　I　care　not　if　the　whole　was　。

Heark　ye；　Lewis；　my　misanthropy　increases　every　day　　The　longer　I
live；　I　find　the　folly　and　the　fraud　of　mankind　grow　more　and
more　intolerable　　I　wish　I　had　not　come　from　Brambletonhall；
after　having　lived　in　solitude　so　long；　I　cannot　bear　the　hurry
and　impertinence　of　the　multitude；　besides；　every　thing　is
sophisticated　in　these　crowded　places。　Snares　are　laid　for　our
lives　in　every　thing　we　cat　or　drink：　the　very　air　we　breathe；　is
loaded　with　contagion。　We　cannot　even　sleep；　without　risque　of
infection。　I　say；　infection　　This　place　is　the　rendezvous　of　the
diseased　　You　won't　deny；　that　many　diseases　are　infectious；　even
the　consumption　itself；　is　highly　infectious。　When　a　person　dies
of　it　in　Italy；　the　bed　and　bedding　are　destroyed；　the　other
furniture　is　exposed　to　the　weather　and　the　apartment　white…washed；
before　it　is　occupied　by　any　other　living　soul。　You'll
allow；　that　nothing　receives　infection　sooner；　or　retains　it
longer；　than　blankets；　feather…beds；　and　matrasses　　'Sdeath！　how
do　I　know　what　miserable　objects　have　been　stewing　in　the　bed
where　I　now　lie！　　I　wonder；　Dick；　you　did　not　put　me　in　mind　of
sending　for　my　own　matrasses　　But；　if　I　had　not　been　an　ass；　I
should　not　have　needed　a　remembrancer　　There　is　always　some
plaguy　reflection　that　rises　up　in　judgment　against　me；　and
ruffles　my　spirits　　Therefore；　let　us　change　the　subject。

I　have　other　reasons　for　abridging　my　stay　at　Bath　　You　know
sister　Tabby's　complexion　　If　Mrs　Tabitha　Bramble　had　been　of　any
other　race；　I　should　certainly　have　considered　her　as　the　most　。
But；　the　truth　is；　she　has　found　means　to　interest　my　affection；
or；　rather；　she　is　beholden　to　the　force　of　prejudice；　commonly
called　the　ties　of　blood。　Well；　this　amiable　maiden　has　actually
commenced　a　flirting　correspondence　with　an　Irish　baronet　of
sixty…five。　His　name　is　Sir　Ulic　Mackilligut。　He　is　said　to　be
much　out　at　elbows；　and；　I　believe；　has　received　false
intelligence　with　respect　to　her　fortune。　Be　that　as　it　may；　the
connexion　is　exceedingly　ridiculous；　and　begins　already　to　excite
whispers。　For　my　part；　I　have　no　intention　to　dispute　her　free…agency；
though　I　shall　fall　upon　some　expedient　to　undeceive　her
paramour；　as　to　the　point　which　he　has　principally　in　view。　But　I
don't　think　her　conduct　is　a　proper　example　for　Liddy；　who　has
also　attracted　the　notice　of　some　coxcombs　in　the　Rooms；　and　Jery
tells　me；　he　suspects　a　strapping　fellow；　the　knight's　nephew；　of
some　design　upon　the　girl's　heart。　I　shall；　therefore；　keep　a
strict　eye　over　her　aunt　and　her；　and　even　shift　the　scene；　if　I
find　the　matter　grow　more　serious　　You　perceive　what　an　agreeable
task　it　must　be；　to　a　man　of　my　kidney；　to　have　the　cure　of　such
souls　as　these。　　But；　hold；　You　shall　not　have　another　peevish
word　（till　the　next　occasion）　from

Yours；
MATT。　BRAMBLE
BATH；　April　28。



To　Sir　WATKIN　PHILLIPS；　of　Jesus　college；　Oxon。

DEAR　KNIGHT；

I　think　those　people　are　unreasonable；　who　complain　that　Bath　is
a　contracted　circle；　in　which　the　same　dull　scenes　perpetually
revolve；　without　variation　　I　am；　on　the　contrary；　amazed　to　find
so　small　a　place　so　crowded　with　entertainment　and　variety。
London　itself　can　hardly　exhibit　one　species　of　diversion；　to
which　we　have　not　something　analogous　at　Bath；　over　and　above
those　singular　advantages　that　are　peculiar　to　the　place。　Here；
for　example；　a　man　has　daily　opportunities　of　seeing　the　most
remarkable　characters　of　the　community。　He　sees　them　in　their
natural　attitudes　and　true　colours；　descended　from　their
pedestals；　and　divested　of　their　formal　draperies；　undisguised　by
art　and　affectation　　Here　we　have　ministers　of　state；　judges；
generals；　bishops；　projector