the expedition of humphry clinker-第39部分

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to　maintain　good…fellowship；　and　promote　the　purposes　of
humanity；　in　favour　of　those　who　come　hither　on　the　score　of
health。　I　see　several　faces　which　we　left　at　Bath；　although　the
majority　are　of　the　Northern　counties；　and　many　come　from
Scotland　for　the　benefit　of　these　waters　　In　such　a　variety；
there　must　be　some　originals；　among　whom　Mrs　Tabitha　Bramble　is
not　the　most　inconsiderable　　No　place　where　there　is　such　an
intercourse　between　the　sexes；　can　be　disagreeable　to　a　lady　of
her　views　and　temperament　　She　has　had　some　warm　disputes　at
table；　with　a　lame　parson　from　Northumberland；　on　the　new　birth；
and　the　insignificance　of　moral　virtue；　and　her　arguments　have
been　reinforced　by　an　old　Scotch　lawyer；　in　a　rye　periwig；　who；
though　he　has　lost　his　teeth；　and　the　use　of　his　limbs；　can　still
wag　his　tongue　with　great　volubility。　He　has　paid　her　such
fulsome　compliments；　upon　her　piety　and　learning；　as　seem　to　have
won　her　heart；　and　she；　in　her　turn；　treats　him　with　such
attention　as　indicates　a　design　upon　his　person；　but；　by　all
accounts；　he　is　too　much　of　a　fox　to　be　inveigled　into　any　snare
that　she　can　lay　for　his　affection。

We　do　not　propose　to　stay　long　at　Harrigate；　though；　at　present；
it　is　our　headquarters；　from　whence　we　shall　make　some
excursions；　to　visit　two　or　three　of　our　rich　relations；　who　are
settled　in　this　country。　　Pray；　remember　me　to　all　our　friends　of
Jesus；　and　allow　me　to　be　still

Yours　affectionately；
J。　MELFORD
HARRIGATE；　June　23。



To　Dr　LEWIS。

DEAR　DOCTOR；

Considering　the　tax　we　pay　for　turnpikes；　the　roads　of　this
county　constitute　a　most　intolerable　grievance。　Between　Newark
and　Weatherby；　I　have　suffered　more　from　jolting　and　swinging
than　ever　I　felt　in　the　whole　course　of　my　life；　although　the
carriage　is　remarkably　commodious　and　well　hung；　and　the
postilions　were　very　careful　in　driving。　I　am　now　safely　housed
at　the　New　Inn；　at　Harrigate；　whither　I　came　to　satisfy　my
curiosity；　rather　than　with　any　view　of　advantage　to　my　health；
and；　truly；　after　having　considered　all　the　parts　and　particulars
of　the　place；　I　cannot　account　for　the　concourse　of　people　one
finds　here；　upon　any　other　principle　but　that　of　caprice；　which
seems　to　be　the　character　of　our　nation。

Harrigate　is　a　wild　common；　bare　and　bleak；　without　tree　or
shrub；　or　the　least　signs　of　cultivation；　and　the　people　who
come　to　drink　the　water；　are　crowded　together　in　paltry　inns；
where　the　few　tolerable　rooms　are　monopolized　by　the　friends　and
favourites　of　the　house；　and　all　the　rest　of　the　lodgers　are
obliged　to　put　up　with　dirty　holes；　where　there　is　neither　space；
air；　nor　convenience。　My　apartment　is　about　ten　feet　square；　and
when　the　folding　bed　is　down；　there　is　just　room　sufficient　to
pass　between　it　and　the　fire。　One　might　expect；　indeed；　that
there　would　be　no　occasion　for　a　fire　at　Midsummer；　but　here　the
climate　is　so　backward；　that　an　ash　tree；　which　our　landlord
has　planted　before　my　window；　is　just　beginning　to　put　forth　its
leaves；　and　I　am　fain　to　have　my　bed　warmed　every　night。

As　for　the　water；　which　is　said　to　have　effected　so　many
surprising　cures；　I　have　drank　it　once；　and　the　first　draught　has
cured　me　of　all　desire　to　repeat　the　medicine。　　Some　people　say
it　smells　of　rotten　eggs；　and　others　compare　it　to　the　scourings
of　a　foul　gun。　　It　is　generally　supposed　to　be　strongly
impregnated　with　sulphur；　and　Dr　Shaw；　in　his　book　upon　mineral
water；　says；　he　has　seen　flakes　of　sulphur　floating　in　the　well　
Pace　tanti　viri；　I；　for　my　part；　have　never　observed　any　thing
like　sulphur；　either　in　or　about　the　well；　neither　do　I　find　that
any　brimstone　has　ever　been　extracted　from　the　water。　As　for　the
smell；　if　I　may　be　allowed　to　judge　from　my　own　organs；　it　is
exactly　that　of　bilge…water；　and　the　saline　taste　of　it　seems　to
declare　that　it　is　nothing　else　than　salt　water　putrified　in　the
bowels　of　the　earth。　I　was　obliged　to　hold　my　nose　with　one　hand；
while　I　advanced　the　glass　to　my　mouth　with　the　other；　and　after
I　had　made　shift　to　swallow　it；　my　stomach　could　hardly　retain
what　it　had　received。　　The　only　effects　it　produced　were
sickness；　griping；　and　insurmountable　disgust。　　I　can　hardly
mention　it　without　puking。　　The　world　is　strangely　misled　by　the
affectation　of　singularity。　I　cannot　help　suspecting；　that　this
water　owes　its　reputation　in　a　great　measure　to　its　being　so
strikingly　offensive。　　On　the　same　kind　of　analogy；　a　German
doctor　has　introduced　hemlock　and　other　poisons；　as　specifics；
into　the　materia　medica。　　I　am　persuaded；　that　all　the　cures
ascribed　to　the　Harrigate　water；　would　have　been　as
efficaciously；　and　infinitely　more　agreeably　performed；　by　the
internal　and　external　use　of　seawater。　Sure　I　am；　this　last　is
much　less　nauseous　to　the　taste　and　smell；　and　much　more　gentle
in　its　operation　as　a　purge；　as　well　as　more　extensive　in　its
medical　qualities。

Two　days　ago　we　went　across　the　country　to　visit　'squire　Burdock；
who　married　a　first　cousin　of　my　father；　an　heiress；　who　brought
him　an　estate　of　a　thousand　a…year。　This　gentleman　is　a　declared
opponent　of　the　ministry　in　parliament；　and　having　an　opulent
fortune；　piques　himself　upon　living　in　the　country；　and
maintaining　old　English　hospitality　　By　the　bye；　this　is　a　phrase
very　much　used　by　the　English　themselves　both　in　words　and
writing；　but　I　never　heard　of　it　out　of　the　island；　except　by　way
of　irony　and　sarcasm。　What　the　hospitality　of　our　forefathers　has
been　I　should　be　glad　to　see　recorded；　rather　in　the　memoirs　of
strangers　who　have　visited　our　country；　and　were　the　proper
objects　and　judges　of　such　hospitality；　than　in　the　discourse　and
lucubrations　of　the　modern　English；　who　seem　to　describe　it　from
theory　and　conjecture。　Certain　it　is；　we　are　generally　looked
upon　by　foreigners；　as　a　people　totally　destitute　of　this　virtue；
and　I　never　was　in　any　country　abroad；　where　I　did　not　meet　with
persons　of　distinction；　who　complained　of　having　been
inhospitably　used　in　Great　Britain。　A　gentleman　of　France；　Italy；
or　Germany；　who　has　entertained　and　lodged　an　Englishman　at　his
house；　when　he　afterwards　meets　with　his　guest　at　London；　is
asked　to　dinner　at　the　Saracen's…head；　the　Turk's…head；　the
Boar's…head；　or　the　Bear；　eats　raw　beef　and　butter；　drinks
execrable　port；　and　is　allowed　to　pay　his　share　of　the　reckoning。

But　to　return　from　this　digression；　which　my　feeling　for　the
honour　of　my　country　obliged　me　to　make　　our　Yorkshire　cousin　has
been　a　mighty　fox…hunter　before　the　Lord；　but　now　he　is　too　fat
and　unwieldy　to　leap　ditches　and　five…bar　gates；　nevertheless；　he
still　keeps　a　pack　of　hounds；　which　are　well　exercised；　and　his
huntsman　every　night　entertains　him　with　the　adventures　of　the
day's　chace；　which　he　recites　in　a　tone　and　terms　that　are
extremely　curious　and　significant。　In　the　mean　time；　his　broad
brawn　is　scratched　by　one　of　his　grooms。　　This　fellow；　it
seems；　having　no　inclination　to　curry　any　beast　out　of　the
stable；　was　at　great　pains　to　scollop　his　nails　in　such　a　manner
that　the　blood　followed　at　every　stroke。　　He　was　in　hopes　that　he
would　be　dismissed　from　this　disagreeable　office；　but　the　event
turned　out　contrary　to　his　expectation。　　His　master　declared　he
was　the　best　scratcher　in　the　family；　and　now　he　will　not　suffer
any　other　servant　to　draw　a　nail　upon　his　carcase。

The　'squire's　lady　is　very　proud；　without　being　stiff　or
inaccessible。　She　receives　even　her　inferiors　in　point　of　fortune
with　a　kind　of　arrogant　civility；　but　then　she　thinks　she　has　a
right　to　treat　them　with　the　most　ungracious　freedoms　of　speech；
and　never　fails　to　let　them　know　she　is　sensible　of　her　own
superior　affluence。　In　a　word；　she　speaks　well　of　no　living　soul；
and　has　not　one　single　friend　in　the　world。　Her　husband　hates　her
mortally；　but；　although　the　brute　is　sometimes　so　very　powerful
in　him　that　he　will　have　his　own　way；　he　generally　truckles　to
her　dominion；　and　dreads；　like　a　school…boy；　the　lash　of　her
tongue。　On　the　other　hand；　she　is　afraid　of　provoking　him　too
far；　lest　he　should　make　some　desperate　effort　to　shake　off　her
yoke。　　She；　therefore；　acquiesces　in　the　proofs　he　daily　gives　of
his　attachment　to　the　liberty　of　an　English　freeholder；　by　saying
and　doing；　at　his　own　table；　whatever　gratifies　the　brutality　of
his　disposition；　or　contributes　to　the　case　of　his　person。　The
house；　though　large；　is　neither　elegant　nor　comfortable。　　It
looks　like　a　great　inn；　crowded　with　travellers；　who　dine　at　the
landlord's　ordinary；　where　there　is　a　great　profusion　of　victuals
and　drink；　but　mine　host　seems　to　be　misplaced；　and　I　would
rather　dine　upon　filberts　with　a　hermit；　than　feed　upon　venison
with　a　hog。　The　footmen　might　be　aptly　compared　to　the　waiters　of
a　tavern；　if　they　were　more　serviceable　and　less　rapacious；　but
they　are　generally　insolent　and　inattentive；　and　so　greedy；　that；
I　think；　I　can　dine　better；　and　for　less　expence；　at　the　Star　and
Garter　in　Pall　mall；　than　at　our　cousin's　castle　in　Yorkshire。
The　'squire　is　not　only　accommodated　with　a　wife；　but　he　is　also
blessed　with　an　only　son；　about　two　and　twenty；　just　returned
from　Italy；　a　complete　fidler　and　dillettante；　and　he　slips　no
opportunity　of　manifesting　the　most　perfect　contempt　for　his　own
father。

When　we　arrived；　there　was　a　family　of　foreigners　at　the　house；
on　a　visit　to　this　virtuoso；　with　whom　they　had　been　acquainted
at　the　Spa；　it　was　the　count　de　Melville；　with　his　lady；　on　their
way　to　Scotland。　Mr　Burdock　had　met　with　an　accident；　in
consequence　of　which　both　the　count　and　I　would　have　retired　but
the　young　gentleman　and　his　mother　insisted　upon　our　staying
dinner；　and　their　serenity　seemed　to　be　so　little　ruffled　by　what
had　happened；　that　we　complied　with　their　invitation。　The　'squire
had　been　brought　home　over　night　in　his　post…chaise；　so　terribly
belaboured　about　the　pate；　that　he　seemed　to　be　in　a　state　of
stupefaction；　and　had　ever　since　remained　speechless。　A　country
apothecary；　called　Grieve；　who　lived　in　a　neighbouring　village；
having　been　called　to　his　assistance；　had　let　him　blood；　and
applied　a　poultice　to　his　head；　declaring；　that　he　had　no　fever；
n