the expedition of humphry clinker-第8部分

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frighted　into　a　fit；　from　which　she　was　no　sooner　recovered；　than
Mrs　Tabitha　began　a　lecture　upon　patience；　which　her　brother
interrupted　with　a　most　significant　grin；　'True；　sister；　God
increase　my　patience　and　your　discretion。　I　wonder　（added　he）
what　sort　of　sonata　we　are　to　expect　from　this　overture；　in　which
the　devil；　that　presides　over　horrid　sounds；　hath　given　us　such
variations　of　discord　　The　trampling　of　porters；　the　creaking
and　crashing　of　trunks；　the　snarling　of　curs；　the　scolding　of
women；　the　squeaking　and　squalling　of　fiddles　and　hautboys　out　of
tune；　the　bouncing　of　the　Irish　baronet　over…head；　and　the
bursting；　belching；　and　brattling　of　the　French…horns　in　the
passage　（not　to　mention　the　harmonious　peal　that　still　thunders
from　the　Abbey　steeple）　succeeding　one　another　without
interruption；　like　the　different　parts　of　the　same　concert；　have
given　me　such　an　idea　of　what　a　poor　invalid　has　to　expect　in
this　temple；　dedicated　to　Silence　and　Repose；　that　I　shall
certainly　shift　my　quarters　to…morrow；　and　endeavour　to
effectuate　my　retreat　before　Sir　Ulic　opens　the　ball　with　my　lady
Mac　Manus；　a　conjunction　that　bodes　me　no　good。'　This　intimation
was　by　no　means　agreeable　to　Mrs　Tabitha；　whose　ears　were　not
quite　so　delicate　as　those　of　her　brother　　She　said　it　would　be
great　folly　to　move　from　such　agreeable　lodgings；　the　moment　they
were　comfortably　settled。　She　wondered　he　should　be　such　an　enemy
to　music　and　mirth。　She　heard　no　noise　but　of　his　own　making：　it
was　impossible　to　manage　a　family　in　dumb…shew。　He　might　harp　as
long　as　he　pleased　upon　her　scolding；　but　she　never　scolded；
except　for　his　advantage；　but　he　would　never　be　satisfied；　even
tho'f　she　should　sweat　blood　and　water　in　his　service　　I　have　a
great　notion　that　our　aunt；　who　is　now　declining　into　the　most
desperate　state　of　celibacy；　had　formed　some　design　upon　the
heart　of　Sir　Ulic　Mackilligut；　which　she　feared　might　be
frustrated　by　our　abrupt　departure　from　these　lodgings。　Her
brother；　eyeing　her　askance；　'Pardon　me；　sister　（said　he）　I
should　be　a　savage；　indeed；　were　I　insensible　of　my　own　felicity；
in　having　such　a　mild；　complaisant；　good…humoured；　and
considerate　companion　and　housekeeper；
but　as　I　have　got　a　weak　head；　and　my　sense　of　hearing　is
painfully　acute；　before　I　have　recourse　to　plugs　of　wool　and
cotton；　I'll　try　whether　I　can't　find　another　lodging；　where　I
shall　have　more　quiet　and　less　music。'　He　accordingly　dispatched
his　man　upon　this　service；　and　next　day　he　found　a　small　house　in
Milsham…street；　which　he　hires　by　the　week。　Here；　at　least；　we
enjoy　convenience　and　quiet　within　doors；　as　much　as　Tabby's
temper　will　allow；　but　the　squire　still　complains　of　flying　pains
in　the　stomach　and　head；　for　which　he　bathes　and　drinks　the
waters。　He　is　not　so　bad；　however；　but　that　he　goes　in　person　to
the　pump；　the　rooms；　and　the　coffeehouses；　where　he　picks　up
continual　food　for　ridicule　and　satire。　If　I　can　glean　any　thing
for　your　amusement；　either　from　his　observation　or　my　own；　you
shall　have　it　freely；　though　I　am　afraid　it　will　poorly
compensate　the　trouble　of　reading　these　tedious
insipid　letters　of；

Dear　Phillips；
Yours　always；
J。　MELFORD


To　Dr　LEWIS。
BATH；　April　23。
DEAR　DOCTOR；

If　I　did　not　know　that　the　exercise　of　your　profession　has
habituated　you　to　the　hearing　of　complaints；　I　should　make　a
conscience　of　troubling　you　with　my　correspondence；　which　may　be
truly　called　the　lamentations　of　Matthew　Bramble。　Yet　I　cannot
help　thinking　I　have　some　right　to　discharge　the　overflowings　of
my　spleen　upon　you；　whose　province　it　is　to　remove　those
disorders　that　occasioned　it；　and　let　me　tell　you；　it　is　no　small
alleviation　of　my　grievances；　that　I　have　a　sensible　friend；　to
whom　I　can　communicate　my　crusty　humours；　which；　by　retention；
would　grow　intolerably　acrimonious。

You　must　know；　I　find　nothing　but　disappointment　at　Bath；　which
is　so　altered；　that　I　can　scarce　believe　it　is　the　same　place
that　I　frequented　about　thirty　years　ago。　Methinks　I　hear　you
say；　'Altered　it　is；　without　all　doubt：　but　then　it　is　altered
for　the　better；　a　truth　which；　perhaps；　you　would　own　without
hesitation；　if　you　yourself　was　not　altered　for　the　worse。'　The
reflection　may；　for　aught　I　know；　be　just。　The　inconveniences
which　I　overlooked　in　the　high…day　of　health；　will　naturally
strike　with　exaggerated　impression　on　the　irritable　nerves　of　an
invalid；　surprised　by　premature　old　age；　and　shattered　with　long…suffering　
But；　I　believe；　you　will　not　deny；　that　this　place；
which　Nature　and　Providence　seem　to　have　intended　as　a　resource
from　distemper　and　disquiet；　is　become　the　very　centre　of　racket
and　dissipation。　Instead　of　that　peace；　tranquillity；　and　case；
so　necessary　to　those　who　labour　under　bad　health；　weak　nerves；
and　irregular　spirits；　here　we　have　nothing　but　noise；　tumult；
and　hurry；　with　the　fatigue　and　slavery　of　maintaining　a
ceremonial；　more　stiff；　formal；　and　oppressive；　than　the
etiquette　of　a　German　elector。　A　national　hospital　it　may　be；　but
one　would　imagine　that　none　but　lunatics　are　admitted；　and　truly；
I　will　give　you　leave　to　call　me　so；　if　I　stay　much　longer　at
Bath。　　But　I　shall　take　another　opportunity　to　explain　my
sentiments　at　greater　length　on　this　subject　　I　was　impatient
to　see　the　boasted　improvements　in　architecture；　for　which　the
upper　parts　of　the　town　have　been　so　much　celebrated　and　t'other
day　I　made　a　circuit　of　all　the　new　buildings。　The　Square；　though
irregular；　is；　on　the　whole；　pretty　well　laid　out；　spacious；
open；　and　airy；　and；　in　my　opinion；　by　far　the　most　wholesome　and
agreeable　situation　in　Bath；　especially　the　upper　side　of　it；　but
the　avenues　to　it　are　mean；　dirty；　dangerous；　and　indirect。　Its
communication　with　the　Baths；　is　through　the　yard　of　an　inn；
where　the　poor　trembling　valetudinarian　is　carried　in　a　chair；
betwixt　the　heels　of　a　double　row　of　horses；　wincing　under　the
curry…combs　of　grooms　and　postilions；　over　and　above　the　hazard
of　being　obstructed；　or　overturned　by　the　carriages　which　are
continually　making　their　exit　or　their　entrance　　I　suppose
after　some　chairmen　shall　have　been　maimed；　and　a　few　lives　lost
by　those　accidents；　the　corporation　will　think；　in　earnest；　about
providing　a　more　safe　and　commodious　passage。　The　Circus　is　a
pretty　bauble；　contrived　for　shew；　and　looks　like　Vespasian's
amphitheatre　turned　outside　in。　If　we　consider　it　in　point　of
magnificence；　the　great　number　of　small　doors　belonging　to　the
separate　houses；　the　inconsiderable　height　of　the　different
orders；　the　affected　ornaments　of　the　architrave；　which　are　both
childish　and　misplaced；　and　the　areas　projecting　into　the　street；
surrounded　with　iron　rails；　destroy　a　good　part　of　its　effect
upon　the　eye；　and；　perhaps；　we　shall　find　it　still　more
defective；　if　we　view　it　in　the　light　of　convenience。　The　figure
of　each　separate　dwelling…house；　being　the　segment　of　a　circle；
must　spoil　the　symmetry　of　the　rooms；　by　contracting　them　towards
the　street　windows；　and　leaving　a　larger　sweep　in　the　space
behind。　If；　instead　of　the　areas　and　iron　rails；　which　seem　to　be
of　very　little　use；　there　had　been　a　corridore　with　arcades　all
round；　as　in　Covent…garden；　the　appearance　of　the　whole　would
have　been　more　magnificent　and　striking；　those　arcades　would　have
afforded　an　agreeable　covered　walk；　and　sheltered　the　poor
chairmen　and　their　carriages　from　the　rain；　which　is　here　almost
perpetual。　At　present；　the　chairs　stand　soaking　in　the　open
street；　from　morning　to　night；　till　they　become　so　many　boxes　of
wet　leather；　for　the　benefit　of　the　gouty　and　rheumatic；　who　are
transported　in　them　from　place　to　place。　Indeed　this　is　a
shocking　inconvenience　that　extends　over　the　whole　city；　and；　I
am　persuaded；　it　produces　infinite　mischief　to　the　delicate　and
infirm；　even　the　close　chairs；　contrived　for　the　sick；　by
standing　in　the　open　air；　have　their　frize　linings　impregnated
like　so　many　spunges；　with　the　moisture　of　the　atmosphere；　and
those　cases　of　cold　vapour　must　give　a　charming　check　to　the
perspiration　of　a　patient；　piping　hot　from　the　Bath；　with　all　his
pores　wide　open。

But；　to　return　to　the　Circus；　it　is　inconvenient　from　its
situation；　at　so　great　a　distance　from　all　the　markets；　baths；
and　places　of　public　entertainment。　The　only　entrance　to　it；
through　Gay…street；　is　so　difficult；　steep；　and　slippery；　that　in
wet　weather；　it　must　be　exceedingly　dangerous；　both　for　those
that　ride　in　carriages；　and　those　that　walk　a…foot；　and　when　the
street　is　covered　with　snow；　as　it　was　for　fifteen　days
successively　this　very　winter；　I　don't　see　how　any　individual
could　go　either　up　or　down；　without　the　most　imminent　hazard　of
broken　bones。　In　blowing　weather；　I　am　told；　most　of　the　houses
in　this　hill　are　smothered　with　smoke；　forced　down　the　chimneys；
by　the　gusts　of　wind　reverberated　from　the　hill　behind；　which　（I
apprehend　likewise）　must　render　the　atmosphere　here　more　humid
and　unwholesome　than　it　is　in　the　square　below；　for　the　clouds；
formed　by　the　constant　evaporation　from　the　baths　and　rivers　in
the　bottom；　will；　in　their　ascent　this　way；　be　first　attracted
and　detained　by　the　hill　that　rises　close　behind　the　Circus；　and
load　the　air　with　a　perpetual　succession　of　vapours：　this　point；
however；　may　be　easily　ascertained　by　means　of　an　hygrometer；　or
a　paper　of　salt　of　tartar　exposed　to　the　action　of　the
atmosphere。　The　same　artist　who　planned　the　Circus；　has　likewise
projected　a　Crescent；　when　that　is　finished；　we　shall　probably
have　a　Star；　and　those　who　are　living　thirty　years　hence；　may；
perhaps；　see　all　the　signs　of　the　Zodiac　exhibited　in
architecture　at　Bath。　These；　however　fantastical；　are　still
designs　that　denote　some　ingenuity　and　knowledge　in　the
architect；　but　the　rage　of　building　has　laid　hold　on　such　a
number　of　adventurers；　that　one　sees　new　houses　starting　up　in
every　out…let　and　every　corner　of　Bath；　contrived　without
judgment；　executed　without　solidity；　and　stuck　together　with　so
little　regard　to　plan　and　propriety；　that　the　different　lines　of
the　new　rows　and　buildings　interfere　with；　and　intersect　one
another　in　every　different　angle　of