the american claimant-第6部分

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break　the　news　by　wire　or　post　to　the　Lady　Gwendolen　and　instruct　her
to〃

〃What　Lady　Gwendolen？〃

〃Our　poor　daughter；　who；　alas！〃

〃Sally　Sellers？　　Mulberry　Sellers；　are　you　losing　your　mind？〃

〃There…please　do　not　forget　who　you　are；　and　who　I　am；　remember　your　own
dignity；　be　considerate　also　of　mine。　　It　were　best　to　cease　from　using
my　family　name；　now；　Lady　Rossmore。〃

〃Goodness　gracious；　well；　I　never！　　What　am　I　to　call　you　then？〃

〃In　private；　the　ordinary　terms　of　endearment　will　still　be　admissible；
to　some　degree；　but　in　public　it　will　be　more　becoming　if　your　ladyship
will　speak　to　me　as　my　lord；　or　your　lordship；　and　of　me　as　Rossmore；　or
the　Earl；　or　his　Lordship；　and〃

〃Oh；　scat！　　I　can't　ever　do　it；　Berry。〃

〃But　indeed　you　must；　my　lovewe　must　live　up　to　our　altered　position
and　submit　with　what　grace　we　may　to　its　requirements。〃

〃Well；　all　right；　have　it　your　own　way；　I've　never　set　my　wishes　against
your　commands　yet；　Mulmy　lord；　and　it's　late　to　begin　now；　though　to　my
mind　it's　the　rottenest　foolishness　that　ever　was。〃

〃Spoken　like　my　own　true　wife！　　There；　kiss　and　be　friends　again。〃

〃But…Gwendolen！　　I　don't　know　how　I　am　ever　going　to　stand　that　name。
Why；　a　body　wouldn't　know　Sally　Sellers　in　it。　　It's　too　large　for　her；
kind　of　like　a　cherub　in　an　ulster；　and　it's　a　most　outlandish　sort　of　a
name；　anyway；　to　my　mind。〃

〃You'll　not　hear　her　find　fault　with　it；　my　lady。〃

〃That's　a　true　word。　　She　takes　to　any　kind　of　romantic　rubbish　like　she
was　born　to　it。　　She　never　got　it　from　me；　that's　sure。　　And　sending　her
to　that　silly　college　hasn't　helped　the　matter　anyjust　the　other　way。

〃Now　hear　her；　Hawkins！　　Rowena…Ivanhoe　College　is　the　selectest　and　most
aristocratic　seat　of　learning　for　young　ladies　in　our　country。　　Under　no
circumstances　can　a　girl　get　in　there　unless　she　is　either　very　rich　and
fashionable　or　can　prove　four　generations　of　what　may　be　called　American
nobility。　　Castellated　college…buildingstowers　and　turrets　and　an
imitation　moatand　everything　about　the　place　named　out　of　Sir　Walter
Scott's　books　and　redolent　of　royalty　and　state　and　style；　and　all　the
richest　girls　keep　phaetons；　and　coachmen　in　livery；　and　riding…horses；
with　English　grooms　in　plug　hats　and　tight…buttoned　coats；　and　top…boots；
and　a　whip…handle　without　any　whip　to　it；　to　ride　sixty…three　feet　behind
them〃

〃And　they　don't　learn　a　blessed　thing；　Washington　Hawkins；　not　a　single
blessed　thing　but　showy　rubbish　and　un…american　pretentiousness。　　But
send　for　the　Lady　Gwendolendo；　for　I　reckon　the　peerage　regulations
require　that　she　must　come　home　and　let　on　to　go　into　seclusion　and　mourn
for　those　Arkansas　blatherskites　she's　lost。〃

〃My　darling！　　Blatherskites？　　Remembernoblesse　oblige。〃

〃There；　theretalk　to　me　in　your　own　tongue；　Rossyou　don't　know　any
other；　and　you　only　botch　it　when　you　try。　　Oh；　don't　stareit　was　a
slip；　and　no　crime；　customs　of　a　life…time　can't　be　dropped　in　a　second。
Rossmorethere；　now；　be　appeased；　and　go　along　with　you　and　attend　to
Gwendolen。　　Are　you　going　to　write；　Washington？or　telegraph？〃

〃He　will　telegraph；　dear。〃

〃I　thought　as　much；〃　my　lady　muttered；　as　she　left　the　room。　　〃Wants　it
so　the　address　will　have　to　appear　on　the　envelop。　　It　will　just　make　a
fool　of　that　child。　　She'll　get　it；　of　course；　for　if　there　are　any　other
Sellerses　there　they'll　not　be　able　to　claim　it。　　And　just　leave　her
alone　to　show　it　around　and　make　the　most　of　it。　　Well；　maybe　she's
forgivable　for　that。　　She's　so　poor　and　they're　so　rich；　of　course　she's
had　her　share　of　snubs　from　the　livery…flunkey　sort；　and　I　reckon　it's
only　human　to　want　to　get　even。〃

Uncle　Dan'l　was　sent　with　the　telegram；　for　although　a　conspicuous　object
in　a　corner　of　the　drawing…room　was　a　telephone　hanging　on　a　transmitter；
Washington　found　all　attempts　to　raise　the　central　office　vain。　　The
Colonel　grumbled　something　about　its　being　〃always　out　of　order　when
you've　got　particular　and　especial　use　for　it；〃　　but　he　didn't　explain
that　one　of　the　reasons　for　this　was　that　the　thing　was　only　a　dummy　and
hadn't　any　wire　attached　to　it。　　And　yet　the　Colonel　often　used　itwhen
visitors　were　presentand　seemed　to　get　messages　through　it。　　Mourning
paper　and　a　seal　were　ordered；　then　the　friends　took　a　rest。

Next　afternoon；　while　Hawkins；　by　request；　draped　Andrew　Jackson's
portrait　with　crape；　the　rightful　earl；　wrote　off　the　family　bereavement
to　the　usurper　in　Englanda　letter　which　we　have　already　read。　　He　also；
by　letter　to　the　village　authorities　at　Duffy's　Corners；　Arkansas；　gave
order　that　the　remains　of　the　late　twins　be　embalmed　by　some　St。　Louis
expert　and　shipped　at　once　to　the　usurperwith　bill。　　Then　he　drafted
out　the　Rossmore　arms　and　motto　on　a　great　sheet　of　brown　paper；　and　he
and　Hawkins　took　it　to　Hawkins's　Yankee　furniture…mender　and　at　the　end
of　an　hour　came　back　with　a　couple　of　stunning　hatchments；　which　they
nailed　up　on　the　front　of　the　houseattractions　calculated　to　draw；　and
they　did；　for　it　was　mainly　an　idle　and　shiftless　negro　neighborhood；
with　plenty　of　ragged　children　and　indolent　dogs　to　spare　for　a　point　of
interest　like　that；　and　keep　on　sparing　them　for　it；　days　and　days
together。

The　new　earl　found…without　surprisethis　society　item　in　the　evening
paper；　and　cut　it　out　and　scrapbooked　it：

　　　　　By　a　recent　bereavement　our　esteemed　fellow　citizen；　Colonel
　　　　　Mulberry　Sellers；　Perpetual　Member…at…large　of　the　Diplomatic　Body；
　　　　　succeeds；　as　rightful　lord；　to　the　great　earldom　of　Rossmore；　third
　　　　　by　order　of　precedence　in　the　earldoms　of　Great　Britain；　and　will
　　　　　take　early　measures；　by　suit　in　the　House　of　Lords；　to　wrest　the
　　　　　title　and　estates　from　the　present　usurping　holder　of　them。　　Until
　　　　　the　season　of　mourning　is　past；　the　usual　Thursday　evening
　　　　　receptions　at　Rossmore　Towers　will　be　discontinued。

Lady　Rossmore's　comment…to　herself：

〃Receptions！　　People　who　don't　rightly　know　him　may　think　he　is
commonplace；　but　to　my　mind　he　is　one　of　the　most　unusual　men　I　ever　saw。
As　for　suddenness　and　capacity　in　imagining　things；　his　beat　don't　exist；
I　reckon。　　As　like　as　not　it　wouldn't　have　occurred　to　anybody　else　to
name　this　poor　old　rat…trap　Rossmore　Towers；　but　it　just　comes　natural　to
him。　　Well；　no　doubt　it's　a　blessed　thing　to　have　an　imagination　that　can
always　make　you　satisfied；　no　matter　how　you　are　fixed。　　Uncle　Dave
Hopkins　used　to　always　say；　'Turn　me　into　John　Calvin；　and　I　want　to　know
which　place　I'm　going　to；　turn　me　into　Mulberry　Sellers　and　I　don't
care。'〃

The　rightful　earl's　comment…to　himself：

〃It's　a　beautiful　name；　beautiful。　　Pity　I　didn't　think　of　it　before　I
wrote　the　usurper。　　But　I'll　be　ready　for　him　when　he　answers。〃




CHAPTER　V。

No　answer　to　that　telegram；　no　arriving　daughter。　　Yet　nobody　showed　any
uneasiness　or　seemed　surprised；　that　is；　nobody　but　Washington。　　After
three　days　of　waiting；　he　asked　Lady　Rossmore　what　she　supposed　the
trouble　was。　　She　answered；　tranquilly：

〃Oh；　it's　some　notion　of　hers；　you　never　can　tell。　　She's　a　Sellers；　all
throughat　least　in　some　of　her　ways；　and　a　Sellers　can't　tell　you
beforehand　what　he's　going　to　do；　because　he　don't　know　himself　till　he's
done　it。　　She's　all　right；　no　occasion　to　worry　about　her。　　When　she's
ready　she'll　come　or　she'll　write；　and　you　can't　tell　which；　till　it's
happened。〃

It　turned　out　to　be　a　letter。　　It　was　handed　in　at　that　moment；　and　was
received　by　the　mother　without　trembling　hands　or　feverish　eagerness；
or　any　other　of　the　manifestations　common　in　the　case　of　long　delayed
answers　to　imperative　telegrams。　　She　polished　her　glasses　with
tranquility　and　thoroughness；　pleasantly　gossiping　along；　the　while；
then　opened　the　letter　and　began　to　read　aloud：

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　KENILWORTH　KEEP；　REDGAUNTLET　HALL；
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　ROWENA…IVANHOE　COLLEGE；　THURSDAY。

　　　　　DEAR　PRECIOUS　MAMMA　ROSSMORE：

　　　　　Oh；　the　joy　of　it！you　can't　think。　　They　had　always　turned　up
　　　　　their　noses　at　our　pretentions；　you　know；　and　I　had　fought　back　as
　　　　　well　as　I　could　by　turning　up　mine　at　theirs。　　They　always　said　it
　　　　　might　be　something　great　and　fine　to　be　rightful　Shadow　of　an
　　　　　earldom；　but　to　merely　be　shadow　of　a　shadow；　and　two　or　three　times
　　　　　removed　at　that…pooh…pooh！　　And　I　always　retorted　that　not　to　be
　　　　　able　to　show　four　generations　of　American…Colonial…Dutch　Peddler…
　　　　　and…Salt…Cod…McAllister…Nobility　might　be　endurable；　but　to　have　to
　　　　　confess　such　an　originpfew…few！　　Well；　the　telegram；　it　was　just　a
　　　　　cyclone！　　The　messenger　came　right　into　the　great　Rob　Roy　Hall　of
　　　　　Audience；　as　excited　as　he　could　be；　singing　out；　〃Dispatch　for　Lady
　　　　　Gwendolen　Sellers！〃　and　you　ought　to　have　seen　that　simpering
　　　　　chattering　assemblage　of　pinchbeck　aristocrats；　turn　to　stone！
　　　　　I　as　off　in　the　corner；　of　course；　by　myselfit's　where　Cinderella
　　　　　belongs。　　I　took　the　telegram　and　read　it；　and　tried　to　faintand　I
　　　　　could　have　done　it　if　I　had　had　any　preparation；　but　it　was　all　so
　　　　　sudden；　you　knowbut　no　matter；　I　did　the　next　best　thing：　I　put　my
　　　　　handkerchief　to　my　eyes　and　fled　sobbing　to　my　room；　dropping　the
　　　　　telegram　as　I　started。　　I　released　one　corner　of　my　eye　a　moment
　　　　　just　enough　to　see　the　herd　swarm　for　the　telegramand　then
　　　　　continued　my　broken…hearted　flight　just　as　happy　as　a　bird。

　　　　　Then　the　visits　of　condolence　began；　and　I　had　to　accept　the　loan　of
　　　　　Miss　Augusta…Templeton…Ashmore　Hamilton's　quarters　because　the　press
　　　　　was　so　great　and　there　isn't　room　for　three　and　a　cat　in　mine。　　And
　　　　　I've　been　holding　a　Lodge　of　Sorrow　ever　since　and　defending　myself
　　　　　against　people's　attempts　to　claim　kin。　　And　do　you　know；　the　very
　　　　　first　girl　to　fetch　her　tears　and　sympathy　to　my　market　was　that
　　　　　foolish　Skimperton　girl　who　has　always　snubbed　me　so　shamefully　and
　　　　　claimed　lordship　and　precedence　of　the　whole　college　because　some
　　　　　ancestor　of　hers；　some　time　or　other；　was　a　McAllister。　　Why　it　was
　　　　　like　the　bottom　bird　in　the　menagerie　putting　on　airs　because　its
　　　　　head　ancestor　wa