the story of a bad boy-第30部分

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n　train　at　4。30。　He　explained　having　purchased　a　ticket　for　Boston；　he　considered　himself　bound　to　the　owners　（the　stockholders　of　the　road）　to　fulfil　his　part　of　the　contract！　To　use　his　own　words；　he　had　〃shipped　for　the　viage。〃

This　struck　me　as　being　so　deliciously　funny；　that　after　I　was　in　bed　and　the　light　was　out；　I　couldn't　help　laughing　aloud　once　or　twice。　I　suppose　the　Admiral　must　have　thought　I　was　meditating　another　escape；　for　he　made　periodical　visits　to　my　bed　throughout　the　night；　satisfying　himself　by　kneading　me　all　over　that　I　hadn't　evaporated。

I　was　all　there　the　next　morning；　when　Sailor　Ben　half　awakened　me　by　shouting　merrily；　〃All　hands　on　deck！〃　The　words　rang　in　my　ears　like　a　part　of　my　own　dream；　for　I　was　at　that　instant　climbing　up　the　side　of　the　Rawlings　to　offer　myself　as　cabin…boy。

The　Admiral　was　obliged　to　shake　me　roughly　two　or　three　times　before　he　could　detach　me　from　the　dream。　I　opened　my　eyes　with　effort；　and　stared　stupidly　round　the　room。　Bit　by　bit　my　real　situation　dawned　on　me。　'What　a　sickening　sensation　that　is；　when　one　is　in　trouble；　to　wake　up　feeling　free　for　a　moment；　and　then　to　find　yesterday's　sorrow　all　ready　to　go　on　again！

〃'Well；　little　messmate；　how　fares　it？〃

I　was　too　much　depressed　to　reply。　The　thought　of　returning　to　Rivermouth　chilled　me。　How　could　I　face　Captain　Nutter；　to　say　nothing　of　Miss　Abigail　and　Kitty？　How　the　Temple　Grammar　School　boys　would　look　at　me！　How　Conway　and　Seth　Rodgers　would　exult　over　my　mortification！　And　what　if　the　Rev。　'Wibird　Hawkins　should　allude　to　me　in　his　next　Sunday's　sermon？

Sailor　Ben　was　wise　in　keeping　an　eye　on　me；　for　after　these　thoughts　took　possession　of　my　mind；　I　wanted　only　the　opportunity　to　give　him　the　slip。

The　keeper　of　the　lodgings　did　not　supply　meals　to　his　guests；　so　we　breakfasted　at　a　small　chophouse　in　a　crooked　street　on　our　way　to　the　cars。　The　city　was　not　astir　yet；　and　looked　glum　and　careworn　in　the　damp　morning　atmosphere。

Here　and　there　as　we　passed　along　was　a　sharp…faced　shop…boy　taking　down　shutters；　and　now　and　then　we　met　a　seedy　man　who　had　evidently　spent　the　night　in　a　doorway。　Such　early　birds　and　a　few　laborers　with　their　tin　kettles　were　the　only　signs　of　life　to　be　seen　until　we　came　to　the　station；　where　I　insisted　on　paying　for　my　own　ticket。　I　didn't　relish　being　conveyed　from　place　to　place；　like　a　felon　changing　prisons；　at　somebody　else's　expense。

On　entering　the　car　I　sunk　into　a　seat　next　the　window；　and　Sailor　Ben　deposited　himself　beside　me；　cutting　off　all　chance　of　escape。

The　car　filled　up　soon　after　this；　and　I　wondered　if　there　was　anything　in　my　mien　that　would　lead　the　other　passengers　to　suspect　I　was　a　boy　who　had　run　away　and　was　being　brought　back。

A　man　in　front　of　us…he　was　near…sighted；　as　I　discovered　later　by　his　reading　a　guide…book　with　his　nose…brought　the　blood　to　my　cheeks　by　turning　round　and　peering　at　me　steadily。　I　rubbed　a　clear　spot　on　the　cloudy　window…glass　at　my　elbow；　and　looked　out　to　avoid　him。

There；　in　the　travellers'　room；　was　the　severe…looking　young　lady　piling　up　her　blocks　of　sponge…cake　in　alluring　pyramids　and　industriously　intrenching　herself　behind　a　breastwork　of　squash…pie。　I　saw　with　cynical　pleasure　numerous　victims　walk　up　to　the　counter　and　recklessly　sow　the　seeds　of　death　in　their　constitutions　by　eating　her　doughnuts。　I　had　got　quite　interested　in　her；　when　the　whistle　sounded　and　the　train　began　to　move。

The　Admiral　and　I　did　not　talk　much　on　the　journey。　I　stared　out　of　the　window　most　of　the　time；　speculating　as　to　the　probable　nature　of　the　reception　in　store　for　me　at　the　terminus　of　the　road。

'What　would　the　Captain　say？　and　Mr。　Grimshaw；　what　would　he　do　about　it？　Then　I　thought　of　Pepper　Whitcomb。　Dire　was　the　vengeance　I　meant　to　wreak　on　Pepper；　for　who　but　he　had　betrayed　me？　Pepper　alone　had　been　the　repository　of　my　secret…perfidious　Pepper！

As　we　left　station　after　station　behind　us；　I　felt　less　and　less　like　encountering　the　members　of　our　family。　Sailor　Ben　fathomed　what　was　passing　in　my　mind；　for　he　leaned　over　and　said：

〃I　don't　think　as　the　Capen　will　bear　down　very　hard　on　you。〃

But　it　wasn't　that。　It　wasn't　the　fear　of　any　physical　punishment　that　might　be　inflicted；　it　was　a　sense　of　my　own　folly　that　was　creeping　over　me；　for　during　the　long；　silent　ride　I　had　examined　my　conduct　from　every　stand…point；　and　there　was　no　view　I　could　take　of　myself　in　which　I　did　not　look　like　a　very　foolish　person　indeed。

As　we　came　within　sight　of　the　spires　of　Rivermouth；　I　wouldn't　have　cared　if　the　up　train；　which　met　us　outside　the　town；　had　run　into　us　and　ended　me。

Contrary　to　my　expectation　and　dread；　the　Captain　was　not　visible　when　we　stepped　from　the　cars。　Sailor　Ben　glanced　among　the　crowd　of　faces；　apparently　looking　for　him　too。　Conway　was　there…he　was　always　hanging　about　the　station…and　if　he　had　intimated　in　any　way　that　he　knew　of　my　disgrace　and　enjoyed　it；　I　should　have　walked　into　him；　I　am　certain。

But　this　defiant　feeling　entirely　deserted　me　by　the　time　we　reached　the　Nutter　House。　The　Captain　himself　opened　the　door。

〃Come　on　board；　sir；〃　said　Sailor　Ben；　scraping　his　left　foot　and　touching　his　hat　sea…fashion。

My　grandfather　nodded　to　Sailor　Ben；　somewhat　coldly　I　thought；　and　much　to　my　astonishment　kindly　took　me　by　the　hand。

I　was　unprepared　for　this；　and　the　tears；　which　no　amount　of　severity　would　have　wrung　from　me；　welled　up　to　my　eyes。

The　expression　of　my　grandfather's　face；　as　I　glanced　at　it　hastily；　was　grave　and　gentle；　there　was　nothing　in　it　of　anger　or　reproof。　I　followed　him　into　the　sitting…room；　and；　obeying　a　motion　of　his　hand；　seated　myself　on　the　sofa。　He　remained　standing　by　the　round　table　for　a　moment；　lost　in　thought；　then　leaned　over　and　picked　up　a　letter。

It　was　a　letter　with　a　great　black　seal。







Chapter　Twenty…One

In　Which　I　Leave　Rivermouth



A　letter　with　a　great　black　seal！

I　knew　then　what　had　happened　as　well　as　I　know　it　now。　But　which　was　it；　father　or　mother？　I　do　not　like　to　look　back　to　the　agony　and　suspense　of　that　moment。

My　father　had　died　at　New　Orleans　during　one　of　his　weekly　visits　to　the　city。　The　letter　bearing　these　tidings　had　reached　Rivermouth　the　evening　of　my　flight…had　passed　me　on　the　road　by　the　down　train。

I　must　turn　back　for　a　moment　to　that　eventful　evening。　When　I　failed　to　make　my　appearance　at　supper；　the　Captain　began　to　suspect　that　I　had　really　started　on　my　wild　tour　southward…a　conjecture　which　Sailor　Ben's　absence　helped　to　confirm。　I　had　evidently　got　off　by　the　train　and　Sailor　Ben　had　followed　me。

There　was　no　telegraphic　communication　between　Boston　and　Rivermouth　in　those　days；　so　my　grandfather　could　do　nothing　but　await　the　result。　Even　if　there　had　been　another　mail　to　Boston；　he　could　not　have　availed　himself　of　it；　not　knowing　how　to　address　a　message　to　the　fugitives。　The　post…office　was　naturally　the　last　place　either　I　or　the　Admiral　would　think　of　visiting。

My　grandfather；　however；　was　too　full　of　trouble　to　allow　this　to　add　to　his　distress。　He　knew　that　the　faithful　old　sailor　would　not　let　me　come　to　any　harm；　and　even　if　I　had　managed　for　the　time　being　to　elude　him；　was　sure　to　bring　me　back　sooner　or　later。

Our　return；　therefore；　by　the　first　train　on　the　following　day　did　not　surprise　him。

I　was　greatly　puzzled；　as　I　have　said；　by　the　gentle　manner　of　his　reception；　but　when　we　were　alone　together　in　the　sitting…room；　and　he　began　slowly　to　unfold　the　letter；　I　understood　it　all。　I　caught　a　sight　of　my　mother's　handwriting　in　the　superscription；　and　there　was　nothing　left　to　tell　me。

My　grandfather　held　the　letter　a　few　seconds　irresolutely；　and　then　commenced　reading　it　aloud；　but　he　could　get　no　further　than　the　date。

〃I　can't　read　it；　Tom；〃　said　the　old　gentleman；　breaking　down。　〃I　thought　I　could。〃

He　handed　it　to　me。　I　took　the　letter　mechanically；　and　hurried　away　with　it　to　my　little　room；　where　I　had　passed　so　many　happy　hours。

The　week　that　followed　the　receipt　of　this　letter　is　nearly　a　blank　in　my　memory。　I　remember　that　the　days　appeared　endless；　that　at　times　I　could　not　realize　the　misfortune　that　had　befallen　us；　and　my　heart　upbraided　me　for　not　feeling　a　deeper　grief；　that　a　full　sense　of　my　loss　would　now　and　then　sweep　over　me　like　an　inspiration；　and　I　would　steal　away　to　my　chamber　or　wander　forlornly　about　the　gardens。　I　remember　this；　but　little　more。

As　the　days　went　by　my　first　grief　subsided；　and　in　its　place　grew　up　a　want　which　I　have　experienced　at　every　step　in　life　from　boyhood　to　manhood。　Often；　even　now；　after　all　these　years；　when　I　see　a　lad　of　twelve　or　fourteen　walking　by　his　father's　side；　and　glancing　merrily　up　at　his　face；　I　turn　and　look　after　them；　and　am　conscious　that　I　have　missed　companionship　most　sweet　and　sacred。

I　shall　not　dwell　on　this　portion　of　my　story。　There　were　many　tranquil；　pleasant　hours　in　store　for　me　at　that　period；　and　I　prefer　to　turn　to　them。



One　evening　the　Captain　came　smiling　into　the　sitting…room　with　an　open　letter　in　his　hand。　My　mother　had　arrived　at　New　York；　and　would　be　with　us　the　next　day。　For　the　first　time　in　weeks…years；　it　seemed　to　me…something　of　the　old　cheerfulness　mingled　with　our　conversation　round　the　evening　lamp。　I　was　to　go　to　Boston　with　the　Captain　to　meet　her　and　bring　her　home。　I　need　not　describe　that　meeting。　With　my　mother's　hand　in　mine　once　more；　all　the　long　years　we　had　been　parted　appeared　like　a　dream。　Very　dear　to　me　was　the　sight　of　that　slender；　pale　woman　passing　from　room　to　room；　and　lending　a　patient　grace　and　beauty　to　the　saddened　life　of　the　old　house。

Everything　was　changed　with　us　now。　There　were　consultations　with　lawyers；　and　signing　of　papers；　and　correspondence；　for　my　father's　affairs　had　been　left　in　great　confusion。　And　when　these　were　settled；　the　evenings　were　not　long　enough　for　us　to　hear　all　my　mother　had　to　tell　of　the　scenes　she　had　passed　through　in　the　ill…fated　city。

Then　there　were　old　times　to　talk　over；　full　of　reminiscences　of　Aunt　Chloe　and　little　Black　Sam。　Little　Black　Sam；　by　the　by；　had　been　taken　by　his　master　from　my