roundabout papers-第33部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


ars　of　age；　with　a　chin　already　quite　black　and　curly；　all　plying　their　victuals　down　their　throats　with　their　knivesallow；　madam；　that　in　such　a　company　a　man　had　a　right　to　feel　a　little　nervous。　　I　don't　know　whether　you　have　ever　remarked　the　Indian　jugglers　swallowing　their　knives；　or　seen；　as　I　have；　a　whole　table　of　people　performing　the　same　trick；　but　if　you　look　at　their　eyes　when　they　do　it；　I　assure　you　there　is　a　roll　in　them　which　is　dreadful。　Apart　from　this　usage；　which　they　practise　in　common　with　many　thousand　most　estimable　citizens；　the　Vermont　gentleman；　and　the　Kentucky　whiskered　ladyor　did　I　say　the　reverse？whichever　you　like　my　dear　sirwere　quite　quiet；　modest；　unassuming　people。　　She　sat　working　with　her　needle；　if　I　remember　right。　　He；　I　suppose；　slept　in　the　great　cabin；　which　was　seventy　feet　long　at　the　least；　nor；　I　am　bound　to　say；　did　I　hear　in　the　night　any　snores　or　roars；　such　as　you　would　fancy　ought　to　accompany　the　sleep　of　ogres。　　Nay；　this　giant　had　quite　a　small　appetite；　（unless；　to　be　sure；　he　went　forward　and　ate　a　sheep　or　two　in　private　with　his　horrid　knifeoh；　the　dreadful　thought！but　IN　PUBLIC；　I　say；　he　had　quite　a　delicate　appetite；）　and　was　also　a　tea…totaler。　　I　don't　remember　to　have　heard　the　lady's　voice；　though　I　might；　not　unnaturally；　have　been　curious　to　hear　it。　　Was　her　voice　a　deep；　rich；　magnificent　bass；　or　was　it　soft；　fluty；　and　mild？　　I　shall　never　know　now。　　Even　if　she　comes　to　this　country；　I　shall　never　go　and　see　her。　　I　HAVE　seen　her；　and　for　nothing。　You　would　have　fancied　that；　as　after　all　we　were　only　some　half…　dozen　on　board；　she　might　have　dispensed　with　her　red　handkerchief；　and　talked；　and　eaten　her　dinner　in　comfort：　but　in　covering　her　chin　there　was　a　kind　of　modesty。　　That　beard　was　her　profession：　that　beard　brought　the　public　to　see　her：　out　of　her　business　she　wished　to　put　that　beard　aside　as　it　were：　as　a　barrister　would　wish　to　put　off　his　wig。　　I　know　some　who　carry　theirs　into　private　life；　and　who　mistake　you　and　me　for　jury…boxes　when　they　address　us：　but　these　are　not　your　modest　barristers；　not　your　true　gentlemen。　Well；　I　own　I　respected　the　lady　for　the　modesty　with　which；　her　public　business　over；　she　retired　into　private　life。　　She　respected　her　life；　and　her　beard。　　That　beard　having　done　its　day's　work；　she　puts　it　away　in　her　handkerchief；　and　becomes；　as　far　as　in　her　lies；　a　private　ordinary　person。　　All　public　men　and　women　of　good　sense；　I　should　think；　have　this　modesty。　　When；　for　instance；　in　my　small　way；　poor　Mrs。　Brown　comes　simpering　up　to　me；　with　her　album　in　one　hand；　a　pen　in　the　other；　and　says；　〃Ho；　ho；　dear　Mr。　Roundabout；　write　us　one　of　your　amusing；〃　&c　。&c。；　my　beard　drops　behind　my　handkerchief　instantly。　　Why　am　I　to　wag　my　chin　and　grin　for　Mrs。　Brown's　good　pleasure？　　My　dear　madam；　I　have　been　making　faces　all　day。　　It　is　my　profession。　　I　do　my　comic　business　with　the　greatest　pains；　seriousness；　and　trouble：　and　with　it　make；　I　hope；　a　not　dishonest　livelihood。　　If　you　ask　Mons。　Blondin　to　tea；　you　don't　have　a　rope　stretched　from　your　garret　window　to　the　opposite　side　of　the　square；　and　request　Monsieur　to　take　his　tea　out　on　the　centre　of　the　rope？　　I　lay　my　hand　on　this　waistcoat；　and　declare　that　not　once　in　the　course　of　our　voyage　together　did　I　allow　the　Kentucky　Giant　to　suppose　I　was　speculating　on　his　stature；　or　the　Bearded　Lady　to　surmise　that　I　wished　to　peep　under　the　handkerchief　which　muffled　the　lower　part　of　her　face。　　〃And　the　more　fool　you；〃　says　some　cynic。　　（Faugh；　those　cynics；　I　hate　'em！）　Don't　you　know；　sir；　that　a　man　of　genius　is　pleased　to　have　his　genius　recognized；　that　a　beauty　likes　to　be　admired；　that　an　actor　likes　to　be　applauded；　that　stout　old　Wellington　himself　was　pleased；　and　smiled　when　the　people　cheered　him　as　he　passed？　Suppose　you　had　paid　some　respectful　compliment　to　that　lady？　Suppose　you　had　asked　that　giant；　if；　for　once；　he　would　take　anything　at　the　liquor…bar？　you　might　have　learned　a　great　deal　of　curious　knowledge　regarding　giants　and　bearded　ladies；　about　whom　you　evidently　now　know　very　little。　　There　was　that　little　boy　of　three　years　old；　with　a　fine　beard　already；　and　his　little　legs　and　arms；　as　seen　out　of　his　little　frock；　covered　with　a　dark　down。　What　a　queer　little　capering　satyr！　　He　was　quite　good…natured；　childish；　rather　solemn。　　He　had　a　little　Norval　dress；　I　remember：　the　drollest　little　Norval。　I　have　said　the　B。　L。　had　another　child。　　Now　this　was　a　little　girl　of　some　six　years　old；　as　fair　and　as　smooth　of　skin；　dear　madam；　as　your　own　darling　cherubs。　　She　wandered　about　the　great　cabin　quite　melancholy。　　No　one　seemed　to　care　for　her。　　All　the　family　affections　were　centred　on　Master　Esau　yonder。　　His　little　beard　was　beginning　to　be　a　little　fortune　already；　whereas　Miss　Rosalba　was　of　no　good　to　the　family。　　No　one　would　pay　a　cent　to　see　HER　little　fair　face。　　No　wonder　the　poor　little　maid　was　melancholy。　　As　I　looked　at　her；　I　seemed　to　walk　more　and　more　in　a　fairy　tale；　and　more　and　more　in　a　cavern　of　ogres。　　Was　this　a　little　fondling　whom　they　had　picked　up　in　some　forest；　where　lie　the　picked　bones　of　the　queen；　her　tender　mother；　and　the　tough　old　defunct　monarch；　her　father？　　No。　　Doubtless　they　were　quite　good…natured　people；　these。　I　don't　believe　they　were　unkind　to　the　little　girl　without　the　moustaches。　　It　may　have　been　only　my　fancy　that　she　repined　because　she　had　a　cheek　no　more　bearded　than　a　rose's。　Would　you　wish　your　own　daughter；　madam；　to　have　a　smooth　cheek；　a　modest　air；　and　a　gentle　feminine　behavior；　or　to　beI　won't　say　a　whiskered　prodigy；　like　this　Bearded　Lady　of　Kentuckybut　a　masculine　wonder；　a　virago；　a　female　personage　of　more　than　female　strength；　courage；　wisdom？　　Some　authors；　who　shall　be　nameless；　are；　I　know；　accused　of　depicting　the　most　feeble；　brainless；　namby…　pamby　heroines；　for　ever　whimpering　tears　and　prattling　commonplaces。　YOU　would　have　the　heroine　of　your　novel　so　beautiful　that　she　should　charm　the　captain　（or　hero；　whoever　he　may　be）　with　her　appearance；　surprise　and　confound　the　bishop　with　her　learning；　outride　the　squire　and　get　the　brush；　and；　when　he　fell　from　his　horse；　whip　out　a　lancet　and　bleed　him；　rescue　from　fever　and　death　the　poor　cottager's　family　whom　the　doctor　had　given　up；　make　21　at　the　butts　with　the　rifle；　when　the　poor　captain　only　scored　18；　give　him　twenty　in　fifty　at　billiards　and　beat　him；　and　draw　tears　from　the　professional　Italian　people　by　her　exquisite　performance　（of　voice　and　violoncello）　in　the　evening；I　say；　if　a　novelist　would　be　popular　with　ladiesthe　great　novel…readers　of　the　worldthis　is　the　sort　of　heroine　who　would　carry　him　through　half　a　dozen　editions。　　Suppose　I　had　asked　that　Bearded　Lady　to　sing？　　Confess；　now；　miss；　you　would　not　have　been　displeased　if　I　had　told　you　that　she　had　a　voice　like　Lablache；　only　ever　so　much　lower。　My　dear；　you　would　like　to　be　a　heroine？　　You　would　like　to　travel　in　triumphal　caravans；　to　see　your　effigy　placarded　on　city　walls；　to　have　your　levees　attended　by　admiring　crowds；　all　crying　out；　〃Was　there　ever　such　a　wonder　of　a　woman？〃　　You　would　like　admiration？　　Consider　the　tax　you　pay　for　it。　　You　would　be　alone　were　you　eminent。　　Were　you　so　distinguished　from　your　neighbors　I　will　not　say　by　a　beard　and　whiskers；　that　were　odiousbut　by　a　great　and　remarkable　intellectual　superioritywould　you；　do　you　think；　be　any　the　happier？　　Consider　envy。　　Consider　solitude。　Consider　the　jealousy　and　torture　of　mind　which　this　Kentucky　lady　must　feel；　suppose　she　should　hear　that　there　is；　let　us　say；　a　Missouri　prodigy；　with　a　beard　larger　than　hers？　　Consider　how　she　is　separated　from　her　kind　by　the　possession　of　that　wonder　of　a　beard？　　When　that　beard　grows　gray；　how　lonely　she　will　be；　the　poor　old　thing！　　If　it　falls　off；　the　public　admiration　falls　off　too；　and　how　she　will　miss　itthe　compliments　of　the　trumpeters；　the　admiration　of　the　crowd；　the　gilded　progress　of　the　car。　　I　see　an　old　woman　alone　in　a　decrepit　old　caravan；　with　cobwebs　on　the　knocker；　with　a　blistered　ensign　flapping　idly　over　the　door。　　Would　you　like　to　be　that　deserted　person？　　Ah；　Chloe！　　To　be　good；　to　be　simple；　to　be　modest；　to　be　loved；　be　thy　lot。　　Be　thankful　thou　art　not　taller；　nor　stronger；　nor　richer；　nor　wiser　than　the　rest　of　the　world！

ON　LETTS'S　DIARY。

Mine　is　one　of　your　No。　12　diaries；　three　shillings　cloth　boards；　silk　limp；　gilt　edges；　three…and…six；　French　morocco；　tuck　ditto；　four…and…six。　　It　has　two　pages；　ruled　with　faint　lines　for　memoranda；　for　every　week；　and　a　ruled　account　at　the　end；　for　the　twelve　months　from　January　to　December；　where　you　may　set　down　your　incomings　and　your　expenses。　　I　hope　yours；　my　respected　reader；　are　large；　that　there　are　many　fine　round　sums　of　figures　on　each　side　of　the　page：　liberal　on　the　expenditure　side；　greater　still　on　the　receipt。　　I　hope；　sir；　you　will　be　〃a　better　man；〃　as　they　say；　in　'62　than　in　this　moribund　'61；　whose　career　of　life　is　just　coming　to　its　terminus。　　A　better　man　in　purse？　in　body？　in　soul's　health？　Amen；　good　sir；　in　all。　　Who　is　there　so　good　in　mind；　body　or　estate；　but　bettering　won't　still　be　good　for　him？　　O　unknown　Fate；　presiding　over　next　year；　if　you　will　give　me　better　health；　a　better　appetite；　a　better　digestion；　a　better　income；　a　better　temper　in　'62　than　you　have　bestowed　in　'61；　I　think　your　servant　will　be　the　better　for　the　changes。　　For　instance；　I　should　be　the　better　for　a　new　coat。　　This　one；　I　acknowledge；　is　very　old。　　The　family　says　so。　　My　good　friend；　who　amongst　us　would　not　be　the　better　if　he　would　give　up　some　old　habits？　　Yes；　yes。　　You　agree　with　me。　　You　take　the　allegory？　　Alas！　at　our　time　of　life　we　don't　like　to　give　up　those　old　habits；　do　we？　　It　is　ill　to　change。　There　is　the　good　old　loose；　easy；　slovenly　bedgown；　laziness；　for　example。　　What　man　of　sense　likes　to　fling　it　off　and　put　on　a　tight　guinde　prim　dress…coat　that　pinches　him？　　There　is　the　cozy　wraprascal；　self…indulgencehow　easy　it　is！　　How　warm！　　How　it　always　seems　to　fit！　　You　can　walk　out　in　it；　you　can　go　down　to　dinner　in　it。　　You　can　say　of　such　what　Tully　says　of　his　books：　Pernoctat　nobiscum；　peregrinatur；　rusticatur