roundabout papers-第60部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


enny　gained。　As　for　clothes；　parbleu！　there　is　not　much　money　to　be　saved　in　clothes；　for　the　fact　is；　as　a　man　advances　in　lifeas　he　becomes　an　Ancient　Briton　（mark　the　pleasantry）he　goes　without　clothes。　When　my　tailor　proposes　something　in　the　way　of　a　change　of　raiment；　I　laugh　in　his　face。　　My　blue　coat　and　brass　buttons　will　last　these　ten　years。　　It　is　seedy？　　What　then？　　I　don't　want　to　charm　anybody　in　particular。　　You　say　that　my　clothes　are　shabby？　　What　do　I　care？　When　I　wished　to　look　well　in　somebody's　eyes；　the　matter　may　have　been　different。　　But　now；　when　I　receive　my　bill　of　10L。　（let　us　say）　at　the　year's　end；　and　contrast　it　with　old　tailors'　reckonings；　I　feel　that　I　have　played　the　game　with　master　tailor；　and　beat　him；　and　my　old　clothes　are　a　token　of　the　victory。　I　do　not　like　to　give　servants　board…wages；　though　they　are　cheaper　than　household　bills：　but　I　know　they　save　out　of　board…wages；　and　so　beat　me。　　This　shows　that　it　is　not　the　money　but　the　game　which　interests　me。　　So　about　wine。　　I　have　it　good　and　dear。　　I　will　trouble　you　to　tell　me　where　to　get　it　good　and　cheap。　　You　may　as　well　give　me　the　address　of　a　shop　where　I　can　buy　meat　for　fourpence　a　pound；　or　sovereigns　for　fifteen　shillings　apiece。　　At　the　game　of　auctions；　docks；　shy　wine…merchants；　depend　on　it　there　is　no　winning；　and　I　would　as　soon　think　of　buying　jewellery　at　an　auction　in　Fleet　Street　as　of　purchasing　wine　from　one　of　your　dreadful　needy　wine…agents　such　as　infest　every　man's　door。　　Grudge　myself　good　wine？　　As　soon　grudge　my　horse　corn。　　Merci！　that　would　be　a　very　losing　game　indeed；　and　your　humble　servant　has　no　relish　for　such。　But　in　the　very　pursuit　of　saving　there　must　be　a　hundred　harmless　delights　and　pleasures　which　we　who　are　careless　necessarily　forego。　What　do　you　know　about　the　natural　history　of　your　household？　　Upon　your　honor　and　conscience；　do　you　know　the　price　of　a　pound　of　butter？　　Can　you　say　what　sugar　costs；　and　how　much　your　family　consumes　and　ought　to　consume？　　How　much　lard　do　you　use　in　your　house？　　As　I　think　on　these　subjects　I　own　I　hang　down　the　head　of　shame。　　I　suppose　for　a　moment　that　you；　who　are　reading　this；　are　a　middle…aged　gentleman；　and　paterfamilias。　　Can　you　answer　the　above　questions？　　You　know；　sir；　you　cannot。　　Now　turn　round；　lay　down　the　book；　and　suddenly　ask　Mrs。　Jones　and　your　daughters　if　THEY　can　answer？　　They　cannot。　　They　look　at　one　another。　　They　pretend　they　can　answer。　　They　can　tell　you　the　plot　and　principal　characters　of　the　last　novel。　　Some　of　them　know　something　about　history；　geology；　and　so　forth。　　But　of　the　natural　history　of　homeNichts；　and　for　shame　on　you　all！　　Honnis　soyez！　　For　shame　on　you？　for　shame　on　us！　In　the　early　morning　I　hear　a　sort　of　call　or　jodel　under　my　window：　and　know　'tis　the　matutinal　milkman　leaving　his　can　at　my　gate。　　O　household　gods！　have　I　lived　all　these　years　and　don't　know　the　price　or　the　quantity　of　the　milk　which　is　delivered　in　that　can？　Why　don't　I　know？　　As　I　live；　if　I　live　till　to…morrow　morning；　as　soon　as　I　hear　the　call　of　Lactantius；　I　will　dash　out　upon　him。　How　many　cows？　　How　much　milk；　on　an　average；　all　the　year　round？　What　rent？　　What　cost　of　food　and　dairy　servants？　　What　loss　of　animals；　and　average　cost　of　purchase？　　If　I　interested　myself　properly　about　my　pint　（or　hogshead；　whatever　it　be）　of　milk；　all　this　knowledge　would　ensue；　all　this　additional　interest　in　life。　What　is　this　talk　of　my　friend；　Mr。　Lewes；　about　objects　at　the　seaside；　and　so　forth？*　　Objects　at　the　seaside？　　Objects　at　the　area…bell：　objects　before　my　nose：　objects　which　the　butcher　brings　me　in　his　tray：　which　the　cook　dresses　and　puts　down　before　me；　and　over　which　I　say　grace！　　My　daily　life　is　surrounded　with　objects　which　ought　to　interest　me。　　The　pudding　I　eat　（or　refuse；　that　is　neither　here　nor　there；　and；　between　ourselves；　what　I　have　said　about　batter…pudding　may　be　taken　cum　granowe　are　not　come　to　that　yet；　except　for　the　sake　of　argument　or　illustration）the　pudding；　I　say；　on　my　plate；　the　eggs　that　made　it；　the　fire　that　cooked　it；　the　tablecloth　on　which　it　is　laid；　and　so　forthare　each　and　all　of　these　objects　a　knowledge　of　which　I　may　acquirea　knowledge　of　the　cost　and　production　of　which　I　might　advantageously　learn？　　To　the　man　who　DOES　know　these　things；　I　say　the　interest　of　life　is　prodigiously　increased。　　The　milkman　becomes；　a　study　to　him；　the　baker　a　being　he　curiously　and　tenderly　examines。　　Go；　Lewes；　and　clap　a　hideous　sea…anemone　into　a　glass：　I　will　put　a　cabman　under　mine；　and　make　a　vivisection　of　a　butcher。　　O　Lares；　Penates；　and　gentle　household　gods；　teach　me　to　sympathize　with　all　that　comes　within　my　doors！　　Give　me　an　interest　in　the　butcher's　book。　　Let　me　look　forward　to　the　ensuing　number　of　the　grocer's　account　with　eagerness。　　It　seems　ungrateful　to　my　kitchen…chimney　not　to　know　the　cost　of　sweeping　it；　and　I　trust　that　many　a　man　who　reads　this；　and　muses　on　it；　will　feel；　like　the　writer；　ashamed　of　himself；　and　hang　down　his　head　humbly。

*　〃Seaside　Studies。〃　　By　G。　H。　Lewes。

Now；　if　to　this　household　game　you　could　add　a　little　money　interest；　the　amusement　would　be　increased　far　beyond　the　mere　money　value；　as　a　game　at　cards　for　sixpence　is　better　than　a　rubber　for　nothing。　If　you　can　interest　yourself　about　sixpence；　all　life　is　invested　with　a　new　excitement。　　From　sunrise　to　sleeping　you　can　always　be　playing　that　gamewith　butcher；　baker；　coal…merchant；　cabman；　omnibus　mannay；　diamond　merchant　and　stockbroker。　　You　can　bargain　for　a　guinea　over　the　price　of　a　diamond　necklace；　or　for　a　sixteenth　per　cent　in　a　transaction　at　the　Stock　Exchange。　　We　all　know　men　who　have　this　faculty　who　are　not　ungenerous　with　their　money。　　They　give　it　on　great　occasions。　　They　are　more　able　to　help　than　you　and　I　who　spend　ours；　and　say　to　poor　Prodigal　who　comes　to　us　out　at　elbow；　〃My　dear　fellow；　I　should　have　been　delighted：　but　I　have　already　anticipated　my　quarter；　and　am　going　to　ask　Screwby　if　he　can　do　anything　for　me。〃　In　this　delightful；　wholesome；　ever…novel　twopenny　game；　there　is　a　danger　of　excess；　as　there　is　in　every　other　pastime　or　occupation　of　life。　　If　you　grow　too　eager　for　your　twopence；　the　acquisition　or　the　loss　of　it　may　affect　your　peace　of　mind；　and　peace　of　mind　is　better　than　any　amount　of　twopences。　　My　friend；　the　old…　clothes'…man；　whose　agonies　over　the　hat　have　led　to　this　rambling　disquisition；　has；　I　very　much　fear；　by　a　too　eager　pursuit　of　small　profits；　disturbed　the　equanimity　of　a　mind　that　ought　to　be　easy　and　happy。　　〃Had　I　stood　out；〃　he　thinks；　〃I　might　have　had　the　hat　for　threepence；〃　and　he　doubts　whether；　having　given　fourpence　for　it；　he　will　ever　get　back　his　money。　　My　good　Shadrach；　if　you　go　through　life　passionately　deploring　the　irrevocable；　and　allow　yesterday's　transactions　to　embitter　the　cheerfulness　of　to…day　and　to…morrowas　lief　walk　down　to　the　Seine；　souse　in；　hats；　body；　clothes…bag　and　all；　and　put　an　end　to　your　sorrow　and　sordid　cares。　Before　and　since　Mr。　Franklin　wrote　his　pretty　apologue　of　the　Whistle　have　we　not　all　made　bargains　of　which　we　repented；　and　coveted　and　acquired　objects　for　which　we　have　paid　too　dearly！　　Who　has　not　purchased　his　hat　in　some　market　or　other？　　There　is　General　M'Clellan's　cocked　hat　for　example：　I　dare　say　he　was　eager　enough　to　wear　it；　and　he　has　learned　that　it　is　by　no　means　cheerful　wear。　There　were　the　military　beavers　of　Messeigneurs　of　Orleans：*　they　wore　them　gallantly　in　the　face　of　battle；　but　I　suspect　they　were　glad　enough　to　pitch　them　into　the　James　River　and　come　home　in　mufti。　　Ah；　mes　amis！　A　chacun　son　schakot！　　I　was　looking　at　a　bishop　the　other　day；　and　thinking；　〃My　right　reverend　lord；　that　broad…brim　and　rosette　must　bind　your　great　broad　forehead　very　tightly；　and　give　you　many　a　headache。　　A　good　easy　wideawake　were　better　for　you；　and　I　would　like　to　see　that　honest　face　with　a　cutty…pipe　in　the　middle　of　it。〃　　There　is　my　Lord　Mayor。　　My　once　dear　lord；　my　kind　friend；　when　your　two　years'　reign　was　over；　did　not　you　jump　for　joy　and　fling　your　chapeau…bras　out　of　window：　and　hasn't　that　hat　cost　you　a　pretty　bit　of　money？　　There；　in　a　splendid　travelling　chariot；　in　the　sweetest　bonnet；　all　trimmed　with　orange…blossoms　and　Chantilly　lace；　sits　my　Lady　Rosa；　with　old　Lord　Snowden　by　her　side。　　Ah；　Rosa！　what　a　price　have　you　paid　for　that　hat　which　you　wear；　and　is　your　ladyship's　coronet　not　purchased　too　dear！　　Enough　of　hats。　　Sir；　or　Madam；　I　take　off　mine；　and　salute　you　with　profound　respect。

*　Two　cadets　of　the　House　of　Orleans　who　served　as　Volunteers　under　General　M'Clellan　in　his　campaign　against　Richmond。

ON　ALEXANDRINES。*　A　LETTER　TO　SOME　COUNTRY　COUSINS。

*　This　paper；　it　is　almost　needless　to　say；　was　written　just　after　the　marriage　of　the　Prince　and　Princess　of　Wales　in　March；　1863。

DEAR　COUSINS；Be　pleased　to　receive　herewith　a　packet　of　Mayall's　photographs　and　copies　of　Illustrated　News；　Illustrated　Times；　London　Review；　Queen；　and　Observer；　each　containing　an　account　of　the　notable　festivities　of　the　past　week。　　If；　besides　these　remembrances　of　home；　you　have　a　mind　to　read　a　letter　from　an　old　friend；　behold　here　it　is。　　When　I　was　at　school；　having　left　my　parents　in　India；　a　good…natured　captain　or　colonel　would　come　sometimes　and　see　us　Indian　boys；　and　talk　to　us　about　papa　and　mamma；　and　give　us　coins　of　the　realm；　and　write　to　our　parents；　and　say；　〃I　drove　over　yesterday　and　saw　Tommy　at　Dr。　Birch's。　　I　took　him　to　the　'George；'　and　gave　him　a　dinner。　　His　appetite　is　fine。　He　states　that　he　is　reading　'Cornelius　Nepos；'　with　which　he　is　much　interested。　　His　masters　report；〃　&c。　　And　though　Dr。　Birch　wrote　by　the　same　mail　a　longer；　fuller；　and　official　statement；　I　have　no　doubt　the　distant　parents　preferred　the　friend's　letter；　with　its　artless；　possibly　ungrammatical；　account　of　their　little　darling。　I　have　seen　the　young　heir　of　Britain。　　These　eyes　have　beheld　him　and　his　bride；　on　Saturday　in　Pall　Mall；　and　on　Tuesday　in　the　nave　of　St。　George's　Chapel　at　Windsor；　when　the　young　Princess　Alexandra　of　Denmark　passed　by　with　her　blooming　procession　of　bridesmaids；　and　half　an　hour　later；　when　the　Princess　of　Wales