carson mccullers - the heart is a lonely hunter-第20部分

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real　nice。　Then　I　going　to　push　off　from　here　by　nine…thirty。　
This　here　is　Saturday　night　and　Highboy　and　Willie　and　me　


haves　our　plans；　too。'　
'Sure；'　Mick　said。　'I　just　want　you　to　help　out　till　things　sort　of　
get　started—you　know。'　
She　gave　in　and　took　one　of　the　sandwiches。　Then　she　made　
Bubber　stay　with　Portia　and　went　into　the　middle　room。　The　
dress　she　would　wear　was　laying　out　on　the　bed。　Hazel　and　
Etta　had　both　been　good　about　lending　her　their　best　clothes—　
considering　that　they　weren't　supposed　to　come　to　the　party。　
There　was　Etta's　long　blue　crepe　de　chine　evening　dress　and　
some　white　pumps　and　a　rhine…stone　tiara　for　her　hair。　These　
clothes　were　really　gorgeous。　It　was　hard　to　imagine　how　she　
would　look　in　them。　
The　late　afternoon　had　come　and　the　sun　made　long；　yellow　
slants　through　the　window。　If　she　took　two　hours　over　
dressing　for　the　party　it　was　time　to　begin　now。　When　she　
thought　about　putting　on　the　fine　clothes　she　couldn't　just　sit　
around　and　wait。　Very　slowly　she　went　into　the　bathroom　and　
shucked　off　her　old　shorts　and　shirt　and　turned　on　the　water。　
She　scrubbed　the　rough　parts　of　her　heels　and　her　knees　and　
especially　her　elbows。　She　made　the　bath　take　a　long　time。　
She　ran　naked　into　the　middle　room　and　began　to　dress。　Silk　
teddies　she　put　on；　and　silk　stockings。　She　even　wore　one　of　
Etta's　brassieres　just　for　the　heck　of　it。　Then　very　carefully　she　
put　on　the　dress　and　stepped　into　the　pumps。　This　was　the　first　
time　she　had　ever　worn　an　evening　dress。　She　stood　for　a　long　
time　before　the　mirror。　She　was

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so　tall　that　the　dress　came　up　two　or　three　inches　above　her　
ankles—and　the　shoes　were　so　short　they　hurt　her。　She　stood　
in　front　of　the　mirror　a　long　tune；　and　finally　decided　she　
either　looked　like　a　sap　or　else　she　looked　very　beautiful。　One　
or　the　other。　
Six　different　ways　she　tried　out　her　hair。　The　cowlicks　were　a　
little　trouble；　so　she　wet　her　bangs　and　made　three　spit　curls。　
Last　of　all　she　stuck　the　rhinestones　in　her　hair　and　put　on　
plenty　of　lipstick　and　paint。　When　she　finished　she　lifted　up　
her　chin　and　half…closed　eyes　like　a　movie　star。　Slowly　she　
turned　her　face　from　one　side　to　the　other。　It　was　beautiful　she　
looked—just　beautiful。　
'　She　didn't　feel　like　herself　at　all。　She　was　somebody　different　


from　Mick　Kelly　entirely。　Two　hours　had　to　pass　before　the　
party　would　begin；　and　she　was　ashamed^　for　any　of　the　
family　to　see　her　dressed　so　far　ahead　of　time。　She　went　into　
the　bathroom　again　and　locked　the　door。　She　couldn't　mess　up　
her　dress　by　sitting　down；　so　she　stood　in　the　middle　of　the　
floor。　The　close　walls　around　her　seemed　to　press　hi　all　the　
excitement。　She　felt　so　different　from　the　old　Mick　Kelly　that　
she　knew　this　would　be　better　than　anything　else　in　all　her　
whole　life—this　party。　

。Yippee！　The　punch！'　
'The　cutest　dress'　
'Say！　You　solve　that　one　about　the　triangle　forty…six　by　
twen'　
'Lemme　by！　Move　out　my　way！'　
The　front　door　slammed　every　second　as　the　people　swarmed　
into　the　house。　Sharp　voices　and　soft　voices　sounded　together　
until　there　was　just　one　roaring　noise。　Girls　stood　in　bunches　
in　their　long；　fine　evening　dresses；　and　the　boys　roamed　
around　in　clean　duck　pants　or　R。O。T。C。　uniforms　or　new　dark　
fall　suite。　There　was　so　much　commotion　that　Mick　couldn't　
notice　any　separate　face　or　person。　She　stood　by　the　hatrack　
and　stared　around　at　the　party　as　a　whole。　
'Everybody　get　a　prom　card　and　start　signing　up。'　
At　first　the　room　was　too　loud　for　anyone　to　hear　and　pay　
attention。　The　boys　were　so　thick　around　the　punch　bowl　that　
the　table　and　the　vines　didn't　show　at　alL　Only91　
her　Dad's　face　rose　up　above　the　boys'　heads　as　he　smiled　and　
dished　up　the　punch　into　the　little　paper　cups。　On　the　seat　of　
the　hatrack　beside　her　were　a　jar　of　candy　and　two　
handkerchiefs。　A　couple　of　girls　thought　it　was　her　birthday；　
and　she　had　thanked　them　and　unwrapped　the　presents　without　
telling　them　she　wouldn't　be　fourteen　for　eight　more　months。　
Every　person　was　as　clean　and　fresh　and　dressed　up　as　she　
was。　They　smelled　good。　The　boys　had　their　hair　plastered　
down　wet　and　slick。　The　girls　with　their　different…colored　long　
dresses　stood　together；　and　they　were　like　a　bright　hunk　of　
flowers。　The　start　was　marvelous。　The　beginning　of　this　party　
was　O。K。　
'I'm　part　Scotch　Irish　and　French　and'　
*I　got　German　blood'　

She　hollered　about　the　prom　cards　one　more　time　before　she　
went　into　the　dining…room。　Soon　they　began　to　pile　in　from　the　
hall。　Every　person　took　a　prom　card　and　they　lined　up　in　
bunches　against　the　walls　of　the　room。　This　was　the　real　start　
now。　
It　came　all　of　a　sudden　in　a　very　queer　way—this　quietness。　
The　boys　stood　together　on　one　side　of　the　room　and　the　girls　
were　across　from　them。　For　some　reason　every　person　quit　
making　noise　at　once。　The　boys　held　their　cards　and　looked　at　
the　girls　and　the　room　was　very　still。　None　of　the　boys　started　
asking　for　proms　like　they　were　supposed　to　do。　The　awful　
quietness　got　worse　and　she　had　not　been　to　enough　parties　to　
know　what　she　should　do。　Then　the　boys　started　punching　
each　other　and　talking。　The　girls　giggled—but　even　if　they　
didn't　look　at　the　boys　you　could　tell　they　only　had　their　minds　
on　whether　they　were　going　to　be　popular　or　not。　The　awful　
quietness　was　gone　now；　but　there　was　something　jittery　about　
the　
room。　
After　a　while　a　boy　went　up　to　a　girl　named　Delores　Brown。　
As　soon　as　he　had　signed　her　up　the　other　boys　all　began　to　
rush　Delores　at　once。　When　her　whole　card　was　full　they　
started　on　another　girl；　named　Mary。　After　that　everything　
suddenly　stopped　again。　One　or　two　extra　girls　got　a　couple　of　
proms—and　because　she　was　giving　the　party　three　boys　came　
up　to　her。　That　was　all。　
The　people　just　hung　around　in　the　dining…room　and　the　hall。　
The　boys　mostly　flocked　around　the　punch　bowl　

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and　tried　to　show　off　with　each　other。　The　girls　bunched　
together　and　did　a　lot　of　laughing　to　pretend　like　they　were　
having　a　good　time。　The　boys　thought　about　the　girls　and　the　
girls　thought　about　the　boys。　But　all　that　came　of　it　was　a　
queer　feeling　in　the　room。　
It　was　then　she　began　to　notice　Harry　Minowitz。　He　lived　in　
the　house　next　door　and　she　had　known　him　all　her　life。　
Although　he　was　two　years　older　she　had　grown　faster　than　
him；　and　in　the　summer…time　they　used　to　wrestle　and　fight　out　
on　the　plot　of　grass　by　the　street。　Harry　was　a　Jew　boy；　but　he　


did　not　look　so　much　like　one。　His　hair　was　light　brown　and　
straight。　Tonight　he　was　dressed　very　neat；　and　when　he　came　
in　the　door　he　had　hung　a　grown　man's　panama　hat　with　a　
feather　in　it　
on　the　hatrack。　
It　wasn't　his　clothes　that　made　her　notice　him。　There　was　
something　changed　about　his　face　because　he　was　without　the　
horn…rimmed　specs　he　usually　wore。　A　red；　droppy　sty　had　
come　out　on　one　of　his　eyes　and　he　had　to　cock　his　head　
sideways　like　a　bird　in　order　to　see。　His　long；　thin　hands　kept　
touching　around　his　sty　as　though　it　hurt　him。　When　he　asked　
for　punch　he　stuck　the　paper　cup　right　into　her　Dad's　face。　She　
could　tell　he　needed　his　glasses　very　bad。　He　was　nervous　and　
kept　bumping　into　people。　He　didn't　ask　any　girl　to　prom　
except　her—and　that　was　because　it　was　her　party。　
All　the　punch　had　been　drunk。　Her　Dad　was　afraid　she　would　
be　embarrassed；　so　he　and　her　Mama　had　gone　back　to　the　
kitchen　to　make　lemonade。　Some　of　the　people　were　on　the　
front　porch　and　the　sidewalk。　She　was　glad　to　get　out　in　the　
cool　night　air。　After　the　hot；　bright　house　she　could　smell　the　
new　autumn　in　the　darkness。　
Then　she　saw　something　she　hadn't　expected。　Along　the　edge　
of　the　sidewalk　and　in　the　dark　street　there　was　a　bunch　of　
nighborhood　kids。　Pete　and　Sucker　Wells　and　Baby　and　
Spareribs—the　whole　gang　that　started　at　below　Bubber's　age　
and　went　on　up　to　over　twelve。　There　were　even　kids　she　
didn't　know　at　all　who　had　somehow　smelled　a　party　and　come　
to　hang　around。　And　there　were　kids　her　age　and　older　that　she　
hadn't　invited　either　because　they　had　done　something　mean　to　
her　or　she　had　done　something　mean　to　them。　They　were　all　
dirty　and　in　plain94　

shorts　or　draggle…tailed　knickers　or　old　everyday　dresses。　They　
were　just　hanging　around　in　the　dark　to　watch　the　party。　She　
thought　of　two　feelings　when　she　saw　those　kids　—one　was　
sad　and　the　other　was　a　kind　of　warning。　
'I　got　this　prom　with　you。'　Harry　Minowitz　made　out　like　he　
was　reading　on　his　card；　but　she　could　see　nothing　was　written　
on　it。　Her　Dad　had　come　onto　the　porch　and　blown　the　whistle　
that　meant　the　beginning　of　the　first　prom。　


'Yeah；'　she　said。　'Let's　get　going。'　
They　started　out　to　walk　around　the　block。　In　the　long　dress　
she　still　felt　very　ritzy。　'Look　yonder　at　Mick　Kelly！'　one　of　the　
kids　in　the　dark　hollered。　'Look　at　her！'　She　just　walked　on　like　
she　hadn't　heard；　but　it　was　that　Spare…ribs；　and　some　day　soon　
she　would　catch　him。　She　and　Harry　walked　fast　along　the　
dark　sidewalk；　and　when　they　came　to　the　end　of　the　street　
they　turned　down　another　block。　
'How　old　are　you　now；　Mick—thirteen？'　
'Going　on　fourteen。'　
She　knew　what　he　was　thinking。　It　used　to　worry　her　all　the　
time。　Five　feet　six　inches　tall　and　a　hundred　and　three　pounds；　
and　she　was　only　thirteen。　Every　kid　at　the　party　was　a　runt　
beside　her；　except　Harry；　who　was　only　a　couple　of　inches　
shorter。　No　boy　wanted　to　prom　with　a　girl　so　much　taller　than　
him。　But　maybe　cigarettes　would　help　stunt　the　rest　of　her　
growth。　
'I　grew　three　and　a　fourth　inches　just　in　last　year；'　she　said。　
'Once　I　saw　a　lady　at　the　fair　who　was　eight　and　a　half　feet　
tall。　But　you　probably　won't　grow　that　big。'　
Harry　stopped　beside　a　dark　crepe　myrtle　bush。　Nobody　was　
in　sight。　He　took　something　out　of　his　pocket　and　started　
fooling　with　whatever　it　was。　She　leaned　over　to　see—it　was　
his　pair　of　specs　and　he　was　wiping　them　with　his　
handkerchief。　
'Pardon　me；'　he　said。　Then　he　put　on　his　glasses　and　she　could　
hear　him　breathe　deep。　
'You　ought　to　wear　your　specs　all　the　time。'　
'Yeah。'