the awakening and selected short stories(苏醒)-第9部分
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〃Well； how did you like my music？〃 she asked。 The young woman
was unable to answer； she pressed the hand of the pianist convulsively。
Mademoiselle Reisz perceived her agitation and even her tears。 She
patted her again upon the shoulder as she said：
〃You are the only one worth playing for。 Those others？ Bah！〃 and
she went shuffling and sidling on down the gallery toward her room。
But she was mistaken about 〃those others。〃 Her playing had aroused a
fever of enthusiasm。 〃What passion！〃 〃What an artist！〃 〃I have always
said no one could play Chopin like Mademoiselle Reisz！〃 〃That last
prelude！ Bon Dieu！ It shakes a man！〃
It was growing late； and there was a general disposition to disband。
But some one； perhaps it was Robert； thought of a bath at that mystic hour
and under that mystic moon。
X
At all events Robert proposed it； and there was not a dissenting voice。
There was not one but was ready to follow when he led the way。 He did
not lead the way； however； he directed the way； and he himself loitered
behind with the lovers； who had betrayed a disposition to linger and hold
themselves apart。 He walked between them； whether with malicious or
mischievous intent was not wholly clear； even to himself。
The Pontelliers and Ratignolles walked ahead； the women leaning
upon the arms of their husbands。 Edna could hear Robert's voice behind
them； and could sometimes hear what he said。 She wondered why he did
not join them。 It was unlike him not to。 Of late he had sometimes held
away from her for an entire day； redoubling his devotion upon the next and
the next； as though to make up for hours that had been lost。 She missed
him the days when some pretext served to take him away from her； just as
one misses the sun on a cloudy day without having thought much about
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the sun when it was shining。
The people walked in little groups toward the beach。 They talked and
laughed； some of them sang。 There was a band playing down at Klein's
hotel； and the strains reached them faintly； tempered by the distance。
There were strange； rare odors abroad a tangle of the sea smell and of
weeds and damp； new…plowed earth； mingled with the heavy perfume of a
field of white blossoms somewhere near。 But the night sat lightly upon
the sea and the land。 There was no weight of darkness； there were no
shadows。 The white light of the moon had fallen upon the world like the
mystery and the softness of sleep。
Most of them walked into the water as though into a native element。
The sea was quiet now； and swelled lazily in broad billows that melted
into one another and did not break except upon the beach in little foamy
crests that coiled back like slow； white serpents。
Edna had attempted all summer to learn to swim。 She had received
instructions from both the men and women； in some instances from the
children。 Robert had pursued a system of lessons almost daily； and he
was nearly at the point of discouragement in realizing the futility of his
efforts。 A certain ungovernable dread hung about her when in the water；
unless there was a hand near by that might reach out and reassure her。
But that night she was like the little tottering； stumbling； clutching
child； who of a sudden realizes its powers； and walks for the first time
alone； boldly and with over…confidence。 She could have shouted for joy。
She did shout for joy； as with a sweeping stroke or two she lifted her body
to the surface of the water。
A feeling of exultation overtook her； as if some power of significant
import had been given her to control the working of her body and her soul。
She grew daring and reckless； overestimating her strength。 She wanted
to swim far out； where no woman had swum before。
Her unlooked…for achievement was the subject of wonder； applause；
and admiration。 Each one congratulated himself that his special
teachings had accomplished this desired end。
〃How easy it is！〃 she thought。 〃It is nothing；〃 she said aloud； 〃why
did I not discover before that it was nothing。 Think of the time I have
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lost splashing about like a baby！〃 She would not join the groups in their
sports and bouts； but intoxicated with her newly conquered power； she
swam out alone。
She turned her face seaward to gather in an impression of space and
solitude； which the vast expanse of water； meeting and melting with the
moonlit sky； conveyed to her excited fancy。 As she swam she seemed to
be reaching out for the unlimited in which to lose herself。
Once she turned and looked toward the shore； toward the people she
had left there。 She had not gone any great distance that is； what would
have been a great distance for an experienced swimmer。 But to her
unaccustomed vision the stretch of water behind her assumed the aspect of
a barrier which her unaided strength would never be able to overcome。
A quick vision of death smote her soul； and for a second of time
appalled and enfeebled her senses。 But by an effort she rallied her
staggering faculties and managed to regain the land。
She made no mention of her encounter with death and her flash of
terror； except to say to her husband； 〃I thought I should have perished out
there alone。〃
〃You were not so very far； my dear； I was watching you〃； he told her。
Edna went at once to the bath…house； and she had put on her dry
clothes and was ready to return home before the others had left the water。
She started to walk away alone。 They all called to her and shouted to her。
She waved a dissenting hand； and went on； paying no further heed to their
renewed cries which sought to detain her。
〃Sometimes I am tempted to think that Mrs。 Pontellier is capricious；〃
said Madame Lebrun； who was amusing herself immensely and feared that
Edna's abrupt departure might put an end to the pleasure。
〃I know she is；〃 assented Mr。 Pontellier； 〃sometimes； not often。〃
Edna had not traversed a quarter of the distance on her way home
before she was overtaken by Robert。
〃Did you think I was afraid？〃 she asked him； without a shade of
annoyance。
〃No； I knew you weren't afraid。〃
〃Then why did you come？ Why didn't you stay out there with the
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others？〃
〃I never thought of it。〃
〃Thought of what？〃
〃Of anything。 What difference does it make？〃
〃I'm very tired；〃 she uttered； complainingly。
〃I know you are。〃
〃You don't know anything about it。 Why should you know？ I never
was so exhausted in my life。 But it isn't unpleasant。 A thousand
emotions have swept through me to…night。 I don't comprehend half of
them。 Don't mind what I'm saying； I am just thinking aloud。 I wonder
if I shall ever be stirred again as Mademoiselle Reisz's playing moved me
to…night。 I wonder if any night on earth will ever again be like this one。
It is like a night in a dream。 The people about me are like some uncanny；
half…human beings。 There must be spirits abroad to…night。〃
〃There are；〃 whispered Robert； 〃Didn't you know this was the twenty…
eighth of August？〃
〃The twenty…eighth of August？〃
〃Yes。 On the twenty…eighth of August； at the hour of midnight； and if
the moon is shiningthe moon must be shininga spirit that has haunted
these shores for ages rises up from the Gulf。 With its own penetrating
vision the spirit seeks some one mortal worthy to hold him company；
worthy of being exalted for a few hours into realms of the semi…celestials。
His search has always hitherto been fruitless； and he has sunk back；
disheartened； into the sea。 But to…night he found Mrs。 Pontellier。
Perhaps he will never wholly release her from the spell。 Perhaps she will
never again suffer a poor； unworthy earthling to walk in the shadow of her
divine presence。〃
〃Don't banter me；〃 she said； wounded at what appeared to be his
flippancy。 He did not mind the entreaty； but the tone with its delicate
note of pathos was like a reproach。 He could not explain； he could not
tell her that he had penetrated her mood and understood。 He said nothing
except to offer her his arm； for； by her own admission； she was exhausted。
She had been walking alone with her arms hanging limp； letting her white
skirts trail
