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oliver twist(雾都孤儿(孤星血泪))-第40部分

小说: oliver twist(雾都孤儿(孤星血泪)) 字数: 每页4000字

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coals today; and they’ll come back for another; the day after 
tomorrow; as brazen as alabaster。” 

The matron expressed her entire concurrence in this 
intelligible simile; and the beadle went on。 

“I never;” said Mr。 Bumble; “see anything like the pitch it’s got 
to。 The day afore yesterday; a man—you have been a married 
woman; ma’am; and I may mention it to you—a man; with hardly a 
rag upon his back (here Mrs。 Corney looked at the floor); goes to 
our overseer’s door when he has got company coming to dinner; 
and says; he must be relieved; Mrs。 Corney。 As he wouldn’t go 
away; and shocked the company very much; our overseer sent him 
out a pound of potatoes and half a pint of oatmeal。 ‘My heart!’ says 
the ungrateful villain; ‘what’s the use of this to me? You might as 
well give me a pair of iron spectacles!’ ‘Very good;’ says our 
overseer; taking ’em away again; ‘you won’t get anything else 
here。’ ‘Then I’ll die in the streets!’ says the vagrant。 ‘Oh; no; you 
won’t; says our overseer。’” 

“Ha! ha! That was very good! So like Mr。 Grannett; wasn’t it?” 
interposed the matron。 “Well; Mr。 Bumble?” 

“Well; ma’am;” rejoined the beadle; “he went away; and he did 
die in the streets。 There’s a obstinate pauper for you!” 

“It beats anything I could have believed;” observed the matron 
emphatically。 “But don’t you think out…of…door relief a very bad 
thing; anyway; Mr。 Bumble? You’re a gentleman of experience; 
and ought to know。 Come。” 

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“Mrs。 Corney;” said the beadle; smiling as men smile who are 
conscious of superior information; “out…of…door relief; properly 
managed—properly managed; ma’am—is the parochial safeguard。 
The great principle of out…of…door relief is; to give the paupers 
exactly what they don’t want; and then they get tired of coming。” 

“Dear me!” exclaimed Mrs。 Corney。 “Well; that is a good one; 
too!” 

“Yes。 Betwixt you and me; ma’am;” returned Mr。 Bumble; 
“that’s the great principle; and that’s the reason why; if you look at 
any cases that get into them owdacious newspapers; you’ll always 
observe that sick families have been relieved with slices of cheese。 
That’s the rule now; Mrs。 Corney; all over the country。 But; 
however;” said the beadle; stopping to unpack his bundle; “these 
are official secrets; ma’am; not to be spoken of; except; as I may 
say; among the parochial officers; such as ourselves。 This is the 
port wine; ma’am; that the Board ordered for the infirmary: real; 
fresh; genuine port wine; only out of the cask this forenoon; clear 
as a bell; and no sediment!” 

Having held the first bottle up to the light; and shaken it well to 
test its excellence; Mr。 Bumble placed them both on top of a chest 
of drawers; folded the handkerchief in which they had been 
wrapped; put it carefully in his pocket; and took up his hat; as if to 
go。 

“You’ll have a very cold walk; Mr。 Bumble;” said the matron。 

“It blows; ma’am;” replied Mr。 Bumble; turning up his coat…
collar; “enough to cut one’s ears off。” 

The matron looked; from the little kettle; to the beadle; who was 
moving towards the door; and as the beadle coughed; preparatory 
to bidding her good…night; bashfully inquired whether—whether 

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Oliver Twist 241 

he wouldn’t take a cup of tea? 

Mr。 Bumble instantaneously turned back his collar again; laid 
his hat and stick upon a chair; and drew another chair up to the 
table。 As he slowly seated himself; he looked at the lady。 She fixed 
her eyes upon the little teapot。 Mr。 Bumble coughed again; and 
slightly smiled。 

Mrs。 Corney rose to get another cup and saucer from the closet。 
As she sat down; her eyes once again encountered those of the 
gallant beadle; she coloured; and applied herself to the task of 
making his tea。 Again Mr。 Bumble coughed—louder this time than 
he had coughed yet。 

“Sweet; Mr。 Bumble?” inquired the matron; taking up the 
sugar…basin。 

“Very sweet; indeed; ma’am;” replied Mr。 Bumble。 He fixed his 
eyes on Mrs。 Corney as he said this; and if ever a beadle looked 
tender; Mr。 Bumble was that beadle at that moment。 

The tea was made; and handed in silence。 Mr。 Bumble; having 
spread a handkerchief over his knees to prevent the crumbs from 
sullying the splendour of his shorts; began to eat and drink; 
varying these amusements; occasionally; by fetching a deep sigh; 
which; however; had no injurious effect upon his appetite; but; on 
the contrary; rather seemed to facilitate his operations in the tea 
and toast department。 

“You have a cat; ma’am; I see;” said Mr。 Bumble; glancing at 
one who; in the centre of her family; was basking before the fire; 
“and kittens too; I declare!” 

“I am so fond of them; Mr。 Bumble; you can’t think;” replied the 
matron。 “They’re so happy; so frolicsome; and so cheerful; that 
they are quite companions for me。” 

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“Very nice animals; ma’am;” replied Mr。 Bumble approvingly; 
“so very domestic。” 

“Oh; yes!” rejoined the matron; with enthusiasm; “so fond of 
their home; too; that it’s quite a pleasure; I’m sure。” 

“Mrs。 Corney; ma’am;” said Mr。 Bumble; slowly; and marking 
the time with his teaspoon。 “I mean to say this; ma’am; that any 
cat; or kitten; that could live with you; ma’am; and not be fond of 
its home; must be a ass; ma’am。” 

“Oh; Mr。 Bumble!” remonstrated Mrs。 Corney。 

“It’s of no use disguising facts; ma’am;” said Mr。 Bumble; slowly 
flourishing the teaspoon with a kind of amorous dignity which 
made him doubly impressive; “I would drown it myself; with 
pleasure。” 

“Then you’re a cruel man;” said the matron vivaciously; as she 
held out her hand for the beadle’s cup; “and a very hard…hearted 
man besides。” 

“Hard…hearted; ma’am?” said Mr。 Bumble。 “Hard?” Mr。 
Bumble resigned his cup without another word; squeezed Mrs。 
Corney’s little finger as she took it; and inflicting two open…handed 
slaps upon his laced waistcoat; gave a mighty sigh; and hitched his 
chair a very little morsel farther from the fire。 

It was a round table; and as Mrs。 Corney and Mr。 Bumble had 
been sitting opposite each other; with no great space between 
them; and fronting the fire; it will be seen that Mr。 Bumble; in 
receding from the fire; and still keeping at the table; increased the 
distance between himself and Mrs。 Corney; which proceeding 
some prudent readers will doubtless be disposed to admire; and to 
consider an act of great heroism on Mr。 Bumble’s part: he being in 
some sort tempted by time; place; and opportunity; to give 

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Oliver Twist 243 

utterance to certain soft nothings; which; however well they may 
become the lips of the light and thoughtless; so seem 
immeasurably beneath the dignity of judges of the land; members 
of parliament; ministers of state; lord mayors; and other great 
public functionaries but more particularly beneath the stateliness 
and gravity of a beadle; who (as is well known) should be the 
sternest and most inflexible among them all。 

Whatever were Mr。 Bumble’s intentions; however (and no 
doubt they were of the best); it unfortunately happened; as has 
been twice before remarked; that the table was a round one; 
consequently Mr。 Bumble; moving his chair by little and little; 
soon began to diminish the distance between himself and the 
matron; and; continuing to travel round the outer edge of the 
circle; brought his chair; in time; close to that in which the matron 
was seated。 Indeed; the two chairs touched; and when they did so; 
Mr。 Bumble stopped。 

Now; if the matron had moved her chair to the right; she would 
have been scorched by the fire; and if to the left; she must have 
fallen into Mr。 Bumble’s arms; so (being a discreet matron; and no 
doubt foreseeing these consequences at a glance) she remained 
where she was; and handed Mr。 Bumble another cup of tea。 

“Hard…hearted; Mrs。 Corney?” said Mr。 Bumble; stirring his tea; 
and looking up into the matron’s face; “are you hardhearted; Mrs。 
Corney?” 

“Dear me!” exclaimed the matron; “what a very curious 
question from a single man。 What can you want to know for; Mr。 
Bumble?” 

The beadle drank his tea to the last drop; finished a piece of 
toast; whisked the crumbs off his knees; wiped his lips; and 

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deliberately kissed the matron。 

“Mr。 Bumble!” cried that discreet lady in a whisper; for the 
fright was so great; that she had quite lost her voice: “Mr。 Bumble; 
I shall scream!” Mr。 Bumble made no reply; but in a slow and 
dignified manner; put his arm round the matron’s waist。 

As the lady had stated her intention of screaming; of course she 
would have screamed at this additional boldness; but that the 
exertion was rendered unnecessary by a hasty knocking at the 
door; which was no sooner heard; than Mr。 Bumble darted; with 
much agility; to the wine bottles; and began dusting them with 
great violence; while the matron sharply demanded who was 
there。 It is worthy of remark; as a curious physical instance of the 
efficacy of a sudden surprise in counteracting the effects of 
extreme fear; that her voice had quite recovered all its official 
asperity。 

“If you please; mistress;” said a withered old female pauper; 
hideously ugly; putting her head in at the door; “old Sally is a…
going fast。” 

“Well; what’s that to me?” angrily demanded the matron。 “I 
can’t keep her alive; can I?” 

“No; no; mistress;” replied the old woman; “nobody can; she’s 
far beyond the reach of help。 I’ve seen a many people die; little 
babies and great strong men; and I know when death’s a…coming; 
well enough。 But she’s troubled in her mind; and when the fits are 
not on her; and that’s not often; for she is dying very hard—she 
says she has got something to tell; which you must hear。 She’ll 
never die quiet till you co

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