the egoist-第15部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


very　nice　boy；　but　an　ungrateful　boy；　and　there　is　no　telling
whether　you　will　not　punish　any　one　who　cares　for　you。　Come　along
with　me；　pluck　me　some　of　these　cowslips；　and　the　speedwells　near
them；　I　think　we　both　love　wild…flowers。〃　She　rose　and　took　his
arm。　〃You　shall　row　me　on　the　lake　while　I　talk　to　you　seriously。〃

It　was　she；　however；　who　took　the　sculls　at　the　boat…house；　for
she　had　been　a　playfellow　with　boys；　and　knew　that　one　of　them
engaged　in　a　manly　exercise　is　not　likely　to　listen　to　a　woman。

〃Now；　Crossjay；〃　she　said。　Dense　gloom　overcame　him　like　a　cowl。
She　bent　across　her　hands　to　laugh。　〃As　if　I　were　going　to　lecture
you；　you　silly　boy！〃　He　began　to　brighten　dubiously。　〃I　used　to　be
as　fond　of　birdsnesting　as　you　are。　I　like　brave　boys；　and　I　like
you　for　wanting　to　enter　the　Royal　Navy。　Only；　how　can　you　if　you
do　not　learn？　You　must　get　the　captains　to　pass　you；　you　know。
Somebody　spoils　you：　Miss　Dale　or　Mr。　Whitford。〃

〃Do　they？〃　sung　out　young　Crossjay。

〃Sir　Willoughby　does？〃

〃I　don't　know　about　spoil。　I　can　come　round　him。〃

〃I　am　sure　he　is　very　kind　to　you。　I　dare　say　you　think　Mr。
Whitford　rather　severe。　You　should　remember　he　has　to　teach　you；
so　that　you　may　pass　for　the　navy。　You　must　not　dislike　him
because　he　makes　you　work。　Supposing　you　had　blown　yourself　up
to…day！　You　would　have　thought　it　better　to　have　been　working　with
Mr。　Whitford。〃

〃Sir　Willoughby　says；　when　he's　married；　you　won't　let　me　hide。〃

〃Ah！　It　is　wrong　to　pet　a　big　boy　like　you。　Does　not　he　what　you
call　tip　you；　Crossjay？〃

〃Generally　half…crown　pieces。　I've　had　a　crown…piece。　I've　had
sovereigns。〃

〃And　for　that　you　do　as　he　bids　you？　And　he　indulges　you　because
you　。。。　Well；　but　though　Mr。　Whitford　does　not　give　you　money；　he
gives　you　his　time；　he　tries　to　get　you　into　the　navy。〃

〃He　pays　for　me。〃

〃What　do　you　say？〃

〃My　keep。　And；　as　for　liking　him；　if　he　were　at　the　bottom　of　the
water　here；　I'd　go　down　after　him。　I　mean　to　learn。　We're　both　of
us　here　at　six　o'clock　in　the　morning；　when　it's　light；　and　have　a
swim。　He　taught　me。　Only；　I　never　cared　for　schoolbooks。〃

〃Are　you　quite　certain　that　Mr。　Whitford　pays　for　you。〃

〃My　father　told　me　he　did；　and　I　must　obey　him。　He　heard　my　father
was　poor；　with　a　family。　He　went　down　to　see　my　father。　My　father
came　here　once；　and　Sir　Willoughby　wouldn't　see　him。　I　know　Mr。
Whitford　does。　And　Miss　Dale　told　me　he　did。　My　mother　says　she
thinks　he　does　it　to　make　up　to　us　for　my　father's　long　walk　in
the　rain　and　the　cold　he　caught　coming　here　to　Patterne。〃

〃So　you　see　you　should　not　vex　him；　Crossjay。　He　is　a　good　friend
to　your　father　and　to　you。　You　ought　to　love　him。〃

〃I　like　him；　and　I　like　his　face。〃

〃Why　his　face？〃

〃It's　not　like　those　faces！　Miss　Dale　and　I　talk　about　him。　She
thinks　that　Sir　Willoughby　is　the　best…looking　man　ever　born。〃

〃Were　you　not　speaking　of　Mr。　Whitford？〃

〃Yes；　old　Vernon。　That's　what　Sir　Willoughby　calls　him；〃　young
Crossjay　excused　himself　to　her　look　of　surprise。　〃Do　you　know
what　he　makes　me　think　of？his　eyes；　I　mean。　He　makes　me　think
of　Robinson　Crusoe's　old　goat　in　the　cavern。　I　like　him　because
he's　always　the　same；　and　you're　not　positive　about　some　people。
Miss　Middleton；　if　you　look　on　at　cricket；　in　comes　a　safe　man　for
ten　runs。　He　may　get　more；　and　he　never　gets　less；　and　you　should
hear　the　old　farmers　talk　of　him　in　the　booth。　That's　just　my
feeling。〃

Miss　Middleton　understood　that　some　illustration　from　the
cricketing…field　was　intended　to　throw　light　on　the　boy's　feeling　
for　Mr。　Whitford。　Young　Crossjay　was　evidently　warming　to　speak
from　his　heart。　But　the　sun　was　low；　she　had　to　dress　for　the
dinner…table；　and　she　landed　him　with　regret；　as　at　a　holiday
over。　Before　they　parted；　he　offered　to　swim　across　the　lake　in
his　clothes；　or　dive　to　the　bed　for　anything　she　pleased　to　throw；
declaring　solemnly　that　it　should　not　he　lost。

She　walked　back　at　a　slow　pace；　and　sung　to　herself　above　her
darker…flowing　thoughts；　like　the　reed…warbler　on　the　branch
beside　the　night…stream；　a　simple　song　of　a　lighthearted　sound；
independent　of　the　shifting　black　and　grey　of　the　flood
underneath。

A　step　was　at　her　heels。

〃I　see　you　have　been　petting　my　scapegrace。〃

〃Mr。　Whitford！　Yes；　not　petting；　I　hope。　I　tried　to　give　him　a
lecture。　He's　a　dear　lad；　but；　I　fancy；　trying。〃

She　was　in　fine　sunset　colour；　unable　to　arrest　the　mounting　tide。
She　had　been　rowing；　she　said；　and；　as　he　directed　his　eyes；
according　to　his　wont；　penetratingly；　she　defended　herself　by
fixing　her　mind　on　Robinson　Crusoe's　old　goat　in　the　recess　of　the
cavern。

〃I　must　have　him　away　from　here　very　soon；〃　said　Vernon。　〃Here
he's　quite　spoiled。　Speak　of　him　to　Willoughby。　I　can't　guess　at
his　ideas　of　the　boy's　future；　but　the　chance　of　passing　for　the
navy　won't　bear　trifling　with；　and　if　ever　there　was　a　lad　made
for　the　navy；　it's　Crossjay。〃

The　incident　of　the　explosion　in　the　laboratory　was　new　to　Vernon。

〃And　Willoughby　laughed？〃　he　said。　〃There　are　sea…port　crammers
who　stuff　young　fellows　for　examination；　and　we　shall　have　to　pack
off　the　boy　at　once　to　the　best　one　of　the　lot　we　can　find。　I
would　rather　have　had　him　under　me　up　to　the　last　three　months；
and　have　made　sure　of　some　roots　to　what　is　knocked　into　his　head。
But　he's　ruined　here。　And　I　am　going。　So　I　shall　not　trouble　him
for　many　weeks　longer。　Dr。　Middleton　is　well？〃

〃My　father　is　well；　yes。　He　pounced　like　a　falcon　on　your　notes　in
the　library。〃

Vernon　came　out　with　a　chuckle。

〃They　were　left　to　attract　him。　I　am　in　for　a　controversy。

〃Papa　will　not　spare　you；　to　judge　from　his　look。〃

〃I　know　the　look。〃

〃Have　you　walked　far　to…day？〃

〃Nine　and　a　half　hours。　My　Flibbertigibbet　8　is　too　much　for　me　at
times；　and　I　had　to　walk　off　my　temper。〃

She　cast　her　eyes　on　him；　thinking　of　the　pleasure　of　dealing　with
a　temper　honestly　coltish；　and　manfully　open　to　a　specific。

〃All　those　hours　were　required？〃

〃Not　quite　so　long。〃

〃You　are　training　for　your　Alpine　tour。〃

〃It's　doubtful　whether　I　shall　get　to　the　Alps　this　year。　I　leave
the　Hall；　and　shall　probably　be　in　London　with　a　pen　to　sell。〃

〃Willoughby　knows　that　you　leave　him？〃

〃As　much　as　Mont　Blanc　knows　that　he　is　going　to　be　climbed　by　a
party　below。　He　sees　a　speck　or　two　in　the　valley。〃

〃He　has　not　spoken　of　it。〃

〃He　would　attribute　it　to　changes　。　。　。〃

Vernon　did　not　conclude　the　sentence。

She　became　breathless；　without　emotion；　but　checked　by　the　barrier
confronting　an　impulse　to　ask；　what　changes？　She　stooped　to　pluck
a　cowslip。

〃I　saw　daffodils　lower　down　the　park；〃　she　said。　〃One　or　two；
they're　nearly　over。〃

〃We　are　well　off　for　wild　flowers　here；〃　he　answered。

〃Do　not　leave　him；　Mr。　Whitford。〃

〃He　will　not　want　me。〃

〃You　are　devoted　to　him。〃

〃I　can't　pretend　that。〃

〃Then　it　is　the　changes　you　imagine　you　foresee　。。。　If　any　occur；
why　should　they　drive　you　away？〃

〃Well；　I'm　two　and　thirty；　and　have　never　been　in　the　fray：　a
kind　of　nondescript；　half　scholar；　and　by　nature　half　billman　or
bowman　or　musketeer；　if　I'm　worth　anything；　London's　the　field　for
me。　But　that's　what　I　have　to　try。〃

〃Papa　will　not　like　your　serving　with　your　pen　in　London：　he　will
say　you　are　worth　too　much　for　that。〃

〃Good　men　are　at　it；　I　should　not　care　to　be　ranked　above　them。〃

〃They　are　wasted；　he　says。〃

〃Error！　If　they　have　their　private　ambition；　they　may　suppose　they
are　wasted。　But　the　value　to　the　world　of　a　private　ambition；　I　do
not　clearly　understand。〃

〃You　have　not　an　evil　opinion　of　the　world？〃　said　Miss　Middleton；
sick　at　heart　as　she　spoke；　with　the　sensation　of　having　invited
herself　to　take　a　drop　of　poison。

He　replied：　〃One　might　as　well　have　an　evil　opinion　of　a　river：
here　it's　muddy；　there　it's　clear；　one　day　troubled；　another　at
rest。　We　have　to　treat　it　with　common　sense。〃

〃Love　it？〃

〃In　the　sense　of　serving　it。〃

〃Not　think　it　beautiful？〃

〃Part　of　it　is；　part　of　it　the　reverse。〃

〃Papa　would　quote　the　'mulier　formosa'〃。

〃Except　that　'fish'　is　too　good　for　the　black　extremity。　'Woman'
is　excellent　for　the　upper。〃

〃How　do　you　say　that？not　cynically；　I　believe。　Your　view
commends　itself　to　my　reason。〃

She　was　grateful　to　him　for　not　stating　it　in　ideal　contrast　with
Sir　Willoughby's　view。　If　he　had；　so　intensely　did　her　youthful
blood　desire　to　be　enamoured　of　the　world；　that　she　felt　he　would
have　lifted　her　off　her　feet。　For　a　moment　a　gulf　beneath　had　been
threatening。　When　she　said；　〃Love　it？〃　a　little　enthusiasm　would
have　wafted　her　into　space　fierily　as　wine；　but　the　sober；　〃In　the
sense　of　serving　it〃；　entered　her　brain；　and　was　matter　for
reflection　upon　it　and　him。

She　could　think　of　him　in　pleasant　liberty；　uncorrected　by　her
woman's　instinct　of　peril。　He　had　neither　arts　nor　graces；　nothing
of　his　cousin's　easy　social　front…face。　She　had　once　witnessed　the
military　precision　of　his　dancing；　and　had　to　learn　to　like　him
before　she　ceased　to　pray　that　she　might　never　be　the　victim　of　it
as　his　partner。　He　walked　heroically；　his　pedestrian　vigour　being
famous；　but　that　means　one　who　walks　away　from　the　sex；　not
excelling　in　the　recreations　where　men　and　women　join　hands。　He
was　not　much　of　a　horseman　either。　Sir　Willoughby　enjoyed　seeing
him　on　horseback。　And　he　could　scarcely　be　said　to　shine　in　a
drawingroom；　unless　when　seated　beside　a　person　ready　for　real
talk。　Even　more　than　his　merits；　his　demerits　pointed　him　out　as
a　man　to　be　a　friend　to　a　young　woman　who　wanted　one。　His　way　of
life　pictured　to　her　troubled　spirit　an　enviable　smoothness；　and
his　having　achieved　that　smooth　way　she　considered　a　sign　of
strength；　and　she　wished　to　lean　in　idea　upon　some　friendly
strength。　His　reputation　for　indifference　to　the　frivolous　charms
of　girls　clothed　him　with　a　noble　coldness；　and　gave　him　the
distinction　of　a　far…seen　solitary　iceberg　in　Southern　waters。　The
popular　notion　of　hereditary　titled　aristocracy　resembles　her
sentiment　for　a　man　that　would　not　flatter　and　could　not　be
flattered　by　her　sex：　he　appeared　superior　almost　to　awfulness。