the egoist-第78部分

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She　was　a　woman　barren　of　wit；　stripped　of　style；　but　she　was
wealthy　and　a　gossipa　forge　of　showering　sparksand　she
carried　Lady　Culmer　with　her。　The　two　had　driven　from　his　house　to
spread　the　malignant　rumour　abroad；　already　they　blew　the　biting
world　on　his　raw　wound。　Neither　of　them　was　like　Mrs。　Mountstuart；
a　witty　woman；　who　could　be　hoodwinked；　they　were　dull　women；　who
steadily　kept　on　their　own　scent　of　the　fact；　and　the　only　way　to
confound　such　inveterate　forces　was　to　be　ahead　of　them；　and　seize
and　transform　the　expected　fact；　and　astonish　them；　when　they　came
up　to　him；　with　a　totally　unanticipated　fact。

〃You　see；　you　were　in　error；　ladies。〃

〃And　so　we　were；　Sir　Willoughby；　and　we　acknowledge　it。　We　never
could　have　guessed　that！〃

Thus　the　phantom　couple　in　the　future　delivered　themselves；　as
well　they　might　at　the　revelation。　He　could　run　far　ahead。

Ay；　but　to　combat　these　dolts；　facts　had　to　be　encountered；　deeds
done；　in　groaning　earnest。　These　representatives　of　the
pig…sconces　of　the　population　judged　by　circumstances：　airy　shows
and　seems　had　no　effect　on　them。　Dexterity　of　fence　was　thrown
away。

A　flying　peep　at　the　remorseless　might　of　dulness　in　compelling　us
to　a　concrete　performance　counter　to　our　inclinations；　if　we　would
deceive　its　terrible　instinct；　gave　Willoughby　for　a　moment　the
survey　of　a　sage。　His　intensity　of　personal　feeling　struck　so
vivid　an　illumination　of　mankind　at　intervals　that　he　would　have
been　individually　wise；　had　he　not　been　moved　by　the　source　of　his
accurate　perceptions　to　a　personal　feeling　of　opposition　to　his
own　sagacity。　He　loathed　and　he　despised　the　vision；　so　his　mind
had　no　benefit　of　it；　though　he　himself　was　whipped　along。　He
chose　rather　（and　the　choice　is　open　to　us　all）　to　be　flattered　by
the　distinction　it　revealed　between　himself　and　mankind。

But　if　he　was　not　as　others　were；　why　was　he　discomfited；
solicitous；　miserable？　To　think　that　it　should　be　so；　ran　dead
against　his　conqueror's　theories　wherein　he　had　been　trained；
which；　so　long　as　he　gained　success　awarded　success　to　native
merit；　grandeur　to　the　grand　in　soul；　as　light　kindles　light：
nature　presents　the　example。　His　early　training；　his　bright
beginning　of　life；　had　taught　him　to　look　to　earth's　principal
fruits　as　his　natural　portion；　and　it　was　owing　to　a　girl　that　he
stood　a　mark　for　tongues；　naked；　wincing　at　the　possible　malignity
of　a　pair　of　harridans。　Why　not　whistle　the　girl　away？

Why；　then　he　would　he　free　to　enjoy；　careless；　younger　than　his
youth　in　the　rebound　to　happiness！

And　then　would　his　nostrils　begin　to　lift　and　sniff　at　the
creeping　up　of　a　thick　pestiferous　vapour。　Then　in　that　volume　of
stench　would　he　discern　the　sullen　yellow　eye　of　malice。　A
malarious　earth　would　hunt　him　all　over　it。　The　breath　of　the
world；　the　world's　view　of　him；　was　partly　his　vital　breath；　his
view　of　himself。　The　ancestry　of　the　tortured　man　had　bequeathed　
him　this　condition　of　high　civilization　among　their　other
bequests。　Your　withered　contracted　Egoists　of　the　hut　and　the　grot
reck　not　of　public　opinion；　they　crave　but　for　liberty　and　leisure
to　scratch　themselves　and　soothe　an　excessive　scratch。　Willoughby
was　expansive；　a　blooming　one；　born　to　look　down　upon　a　tributary
world；　and　to　exult　in　being　looked　to。　Do　we　wonder　at　his
consternation　in　the　prospect　of　that　world's　blowing　foul　on
him？　Princes　have　their　obligations　to　teach　them　they　are　mortal；
and　the　brilliant　heir　of　a　tributary　world　is　equally　enchained
by　the　homage　it　brings　him；more；　inasmuch　as　it　is　immaterial；
elusive；　not　gathered　by　the　tax；　and　he　cannot　capitally　punish
the　treasonable　recusants。　Still　must　he　be　brilliant；　he　must
court　his　people。　He　must　ever；　both　in　his　reputation　and　his
person；　aching　though　he　be；　show　them　a　face　and　a　leg。

The　wounded　gentleman　shut　himself　up　in　his　laboratory；　where　he
could　stride　to　and　fro；　and　stretch　out　his　arms　for　physical
relief；　secure　from　observation　of　his　fantastical　shapes；　under
the　idea　that　he　was　meditating。　There　was　perhaps　enough　to　make
him　fancy　it　in　the　heavy　fire　of　shots　exchanged　between　his
nerves　and　the　situation；　there　were　notable　flashes。　He　would　not
avow　that　he　was　in　an　agony：　it　was　merely　a　desire　for
exercise。

Quintessence　of　worldliness；　Mrs。　Mountstuart　appeared　through　his
farthest　window；　swinging　her　skirts　on　a　turn　at　the　end　of　the
lawn；　with　Horace　De　Craye　smirking　beside　her。　And　the　woman's
vaunted　penetration　was　unable　to　detect　the　histrionic　Irishism
of　the　fellow。　Or　she　liked　him　for　his　acting　and　nonsense；　nor
she　only。　The　voluble　beast　was　created　to　snare　women。　Willoughby
became　smitten　with　an　adoration　of　stedfastness　in　women。　The
incarnation　of　that　divine　quality　crossed　his　eyes。　She　was　clad
in　beauty。　A　horrible　nondescript　convulsion　composed　of　yawn　and
groan　drove　him　to　his　instruments；　to　avert　a　renewal　of　the
shock；　and　while　arranging　and　fixing　them　for　their　unwonted　
task；　he　compared　himself　advantageously　with　men　like　Vernon　and
De　Craye；　and　others　of　the　county；　his　fellows　in　the
hunting…field　and　on　the　Magistrate's　bench；　who　neither
understood　nor　cared　for　solid　work；　beneficial　practical　work；
the　work　of　Science。

He　was　obliged　to　relinquish　it：　his　hand　shook。

〃Experiments　will　not　advance　much　at　this　rate；〃　he　said；　casting
the　noxious　retardation　on　his　enemies。

It　was　not　to　be　contested　that　he　must　speak　with　Mrs
Mountstuart；　however　he　might　shrink　from　the　trial　of　his　facial
muscles。　Her　not　coming　to　him　seemed　ominous：　nor　was　her
behaviour　at　the　luncheon…table　quite　obscure。　She　had　evidently
instigated　the　gentlemen　to　cross　and　counterchatter　Lady　Busshe
and　Lady　Culmer。　For　what　purpose？

Clara's　features　gave　the　answer。

They　were　implacable。　And　he　could　be　the　same。

In　the　solitude　of　his　room　he　cried　right　out：　〃I　swear　it；　I
will　never　yield　her　to　Horace　De　Craye！　She　shall　feel　some　of　my
torments；　and　try　to　get　the　better　of　them　by　knowing　she
deserves　them。〃　He　had　spoken　it；　and　it　was　an　oath　upon　the
record。

Desire　to　do　her　intolerable　hurt　became　an　ecstasy　in　his　veins；
and　produced　another　stretching　fit　that　terminated　in　a　violent
shake　of　the　body　and　limbs；　during　which　he　was　a　spectacle　for
Mrs。　Mountstuart　at　one　of　the　windows。　He　laughed　as　he　went　to
her；　saying：　〃No；　no　work　to…day；　it　won't　be　done；　positively
refuses。〃

〃I　am　taking　the　Professor　away；〃　said　she；　〃he　is　fidgety　about
the　cold　he　caught。〃

Sir　Willoughby　stepped　out　to　her。　〃I　was　trying　at　a　bit　of　work
for　an　hour；　not　to　be　idle　all　day。〃

〃You　work　in　that　den　of　yours　every　clay？

〃Never　less　than　an　hour；　if　I　can　snatch　it。〃

〃It　is　a　wonderful　resource！〃

The　remark　set　him　throbbing　and　thinking　that　a　prolongation　of
his　crisis　exposed　him　to　the　approaches　of　some　organic　malady；
possibly　heart…disease。

〃A　habit；〃　he　said。　〃In　there　I　throw　off　the　world。〃

〃We　shall　see　some　results　in　due　time。〃

〃I　promise　none：　I　like　to　be　abreast　of　the　real　knowledge　of　my
day；　that　is　all。〃

〃And　a　pearl　among　country　gentlemen！〃

〃In　your　gracious　consideration；　my　dear　lady。　Generally　speaking；
it　would　be　more　advisable　to　become　a　chatterer　and　keep　an
anecdotal　note…book。　I　could　not　do　it；　simply　because　I　could　not
live　with　my　own　emptiness　for　the　sake　of　making　an　occasional
display　of　fireworks。　I　aim　at　solidity。　It　is　a　narrow　aim；　no
doubt；　not　much　appreciated。〃

〃Laetitia　Dale　appreciates　it。〃

A　smile　of　enforced　ruefulness；　like　a　leaf　curling　in　heat；
wrinkled　his　mouth。

Why　did　she　not　speak　of　her　conversation　with　Clara？

〃Have　they　caught　Crossjay？〃　he　said。

〃Apparently　they　are　giving　chase　to　him。〃

The　likelihood　was；　that　Clara　had　been　overcome　by　timidity。

〃Must　you　leave　us？〃

〃I　think　it　prudent　to　take　Professor　Crooklyn　away。〃

〃He　still　。　。　。？〃

〃The　extraordinary　resemblance！〃

〃A　word　aside　to　Dr。　Middleton　will　dispel　that。〃

〃You　are　thoroughly　good。〃

This　hateful　encomium　of　commiseration　transfixed　him。　Then　she
knew　of　his　calamity！

〃Philosophical；〃　he　said；　〃would　be　the　proper　term；　I　think。〃

〃Colonel　De　Craye；　by　the　way；　promises　me　a　visit　when　he　leaves
you。〃

〃To…morrow？〃

〃The　earlier　the　better。　He　is　too　captivating；　he　is　delightful。
He　won　me　in　five　minutes。　I　don't　accuse　him。　Nature　gifted　him　to
cast　the　spell。　We　are　weak　women；　Sir　Willoughby。〃

She　knew！

〃Like　to　like：　the　witty　to　the　witty；　ma'am。〃

〃You　won't　compliment　me　with　a　little　bit　of　jealousy？〃　

〃I　forbear　from　complimenting　him。〃

〃Be　philosophical；　of　course；　if　you　have　the　philosophy。〃

〃I　pretend　to　it。　Probably　I　suppose　myself　to　succeed　because　I
have　no　great　requirement　of　it；　I　cannot　say。　We　are　riddles　to
ourselves。〃

Mrs。　Mountstuart　pricked　the　turf　with　the　point　of　her　parasol。
She　looked　down　and　she　looked　up。

〃Well？〃　said　he　to　her　eyes。

〃Well；　and　where　is　Laetitia　Dale？〃

He　turned　about　to　show　his　face　elsewhere。

When　he　fronted　her　again；　she　looked　very　fixedly；　and　set　her
head　shaking。

〃It　will　not　do；　my　dear　Sir　Willoughby！〃

〃What？〃

I　never　could　solve　enigmas。〃

〃Playing　ta…ta…ta…ta　ad　infinitum；　then。　Things　have　gone　far。　All
parties　would　be　happier　for　an　excursion。　Send　her　home。〃

〃Laetitia？　I　can't　part　with　her。〃

Mrs。　Mountstuart　put　a　tooth　on　her　under　lip　as　her　head　renewed
its　brushing　negative。

〃In　what　way　can　it　be　hurtful　that　she　should　be　here；　ma'am？〃　he
ventured　to　persist。

〃Think。〃

〃She　is　proof。〃

〃Twice！〃

The　word　was　big　artillery。　He　tried　the　affectation　of　a　staring
stupidity。　She　might　have　seen　his　heart　thump；　and　he　quitted
the　mask　for　an　agreeable　grimace。

〃She　is　inaccessible。　She　is　my　friend。　I　guarantee　her；　on　my
honour。　Have　no　fear　for　her。　I　beg　you　to　have　confidence　in　me。
I　would　perish　rather。　No　soul　on　earth　is　to　be　compared　with
her。〃

Mrs。　Mountstuart　repeated　〃Twice！〃

The　low　monosyllable；　musically　spoken　in　the　same　tone　of　warning
of　a　gentle　ghost；　rolled　a　thunder　that　maddened　hi