the well-beloved--a sketch of a temperament-第6部分

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'I　can　see　from　your　face　you　have　something　to　say；　so　we'll　have　it
all　to　ourselves。　　You　are　in　some　trouble？　　What'll　you　drink？'

'Oh！　it　doesn't　matter　what；　so　that　it　is　alcohol　in　some　shape　or
form。　。　。　。　　Now；　Somers；　you　must　just　listen　to　me；　for　I　HAVE
something　to　tell。'

Pierston　had　sat　down　in　an　arm…chair；　and　Somers　had　resumed　his
painting。　　When　a　servant　had　brought　in　brandy　to　soothe　Pierston's
nerves；　and　soda　to　take　off　the　injurious　effects　of　the　brandy；　and
milk　to　take　off　the　depleting　effects　of　the　soda；　Jocelyn　began　his
narrative；　addressing　it　rather　to　Somers's　Gothic　chimneypiece；　and
Somers's　Gothic　clock；　and　Somers's　Gothic　rugs；　than　to　Somers
himself；　who　stood　at　his　picture　a　little　behind　his　friend。

'Before　I　tell　you　what　has　happened　to　me；'　Pierston　said；　'I　want　to
let　you　know　the　manner　of　man　I　am。'

'LordI　know　already。'

'No；　you　don't。　　It　is　a　sort　of　thing　one　doesn't　like　to　talk　of。　　I
lie　awake　at　night　thinking　about　it。'

'No！'　said　Somers；　with　more　sympathy；　seeing　that　his　friend　was
really　troubled。

'I　am　under　a　curious　curse；　or　influence。　　I　am　posed；　puzzled　and
perplexed　by　the　legerdemain　of　a　creaturea　deity　rather；　by
Aphrodite；　as　a　poet　would　put　it；　as　I　should　put　it　myself　in　marble。
。　。　。　　But　I　forgetthis　is　not　to　be　a　deprecatory　wail；　but　a
defencea　sort　of　Apologia　pro　vita　mea。'

'That's　better。　　Fire　away！'



1。　VII。　　HER　EARLIER　INCARNATIONS

'You；　Somers；　are　not；　I　know；　one　of　those　who　continue　to　indulge　in
the　world…wide；　fond　superstition　that　the　Beloved　One　of　any　man
always；　or　even　usually；　cares　to　remain　in　one　corporeal　nook　or　shell
for　any　great　length　of　time；　however　much　he　may　wish　her　to　do　so。
If　I　am　wrong；　and　you　do　still　hold　to　that　ancient　errorwell；　my
story　will　seem　rather　queer。'

'Suppose　you　say　the　Beloved　of　some　men；　not　of　any　man。'

'All　rightI'll　say　one　man；　this　man　only；　if　you　are　so　particular。
We　are　a　strange；　visionary　race　down　where　I　come　from；　and　perhaps
that　accounts　for　it。　　The　Beloved　of　this　one　man；　then；　has　had　many
incarnationstoo　many　to　describe　in　detail。　　Each　shape；　or
embodiment；　has　been　a　temporary　residence　only；　which　she　has　entered；
lived　in　awhile；　and　made　her　exit　from；　leaving　the　substance；　so　far
as　I　have　been　concerned；　a　corpse；　worse　luck！　　Now；　there　is　no
spiritualistic　nonsense　in　thisit　is　simple　fact；　put　in　the　plain
form　that　the　conventional　public　are　afraid　of。　　So　much　for　the
principle。'

'Good。　　Go　on。'

'Well；　the　first　embodiment　of　her　occurred；　so　nearly　as　I　can
recollect；　when　I　was　about　the　age　of　nine。　　Her　vehicle　was　a　little
blue…eyed　girl　of　eight　or　so；　one　of　a　family　of　eleven；　with　flaxen
hair　about　her　shoulders；　which　attempted　to　curl；　but　ignominiously
failed；　hanging　like　chimney…crooks　only。　　This　defect　used　rather　to
trouble　me；　and　was；　I　believe；　one　of　the　main　reasons　of　my　Beloved's
departure　from　that　tenement。　　I　cannot　remember　with　any　exactness
when　the　departure　occurred。　　I　know　it　was　after　I　had　kissed　my
little　friend　in　a　garden…seat　on　a　hot　noontide；　under　a　blue　gingham
umbrella；　which　we　had　opened　over　us　as　we　sat；　that　passers　through
East　Quarriers　might　not　observe　our　marks　of　affection；　forgetting
that　our　screen　must　attract　more　attention　than　our　persons。

'When　the　whole　dream　came　to　an　end　through　her　father　leaving　the
island；　I　thought　my　Well…Beloved　had　gone　for　ever　（being　then　in　the
unpractised　condition　of　Adam　at　sight　of　the　first　sunset）。　　But　she
had　not。　　Laura　had　gone　for　ever；　but　not　my　Beloved。

'For　some　months　after　I　had　done　crying　for　the　flaxen…haired　edition
of　her；　my　Love　did　not　reappear。　　Then　she　came　suddenly；
unexpectedly；　in　a　situation　I　should　never　have　predicted。　　I　was
standing　on　the　kerbstone　of　the　pavement　in　Budmouth…Regis；　outside
the　Preparatory　School；　looking　across　towards　the　sea；　when　a　middle…
aged　gentleman　on　horseback；　and　beside　him　a　young　lady；　also　mounted；
passed　down　the　street。　　The　girl　turned　her　head；　andpossibly
because　I　was　gaping　at　her　in　awkward　admiration；　or　smiling　myself
smiled　at　me。　　Having　ridden　a　few　paces；　she　looked　round　again　and
smiled。

'It　was　enough；　more　than　enough；　to　set　me　on　fire。　　I　understood　in　a
moment　the　information　conveyed　to　me　by　my　emotionthe　Well…Beloved
had　reappeared。　　This　second　form　in　which　it　had　pleased　her　to　take
up　her　abode　was　quite　a　grown　young　woman's；　darker　in　complexion　than
the　first。　　Her　hair；　also　worn　in　a　knot；　was　of　an　ordinary　brown；
and　so；　I　think；　were　her　eyes；　but　the　niceties　of　her　features　were
not　to　be　gathered　so　cursorily。　　However；　there　sat　my　coveted　one；
re…embodied；　and；　bidding　my　schoolmates　a　hasty　farewell　as　soon　as　I
could　do　so　without　suspicion；　I　hurried　along　the　Esplanade　in　the
direction　she　and　her　father　had　ridden。　　But　they　had　put　their　horses
to　a　canter；　and　I　could　not　see　which　way　they　had　gone。　　In　the
greatest　misery　I　turned　down　a　side　street；　but　was　soon　elevated　to　a
state　of　excitement　by　seeing　the　same　pair　galloping　towards　me。
Flushing　up　to　my　hair；　I　stopped　and　heroically　faced　her　as　she
passed。　　She　smiled　again；　but；　alas！　upon　my　Love's　cheek　there　was　no
blush　of　passion　for　me。'

Pierston　paused；　and　drank　from　his　glass；　as　he　lived　for　a　brief
moment　in　the　scene　he　had　conjured　up。　　Somers　reserved　his　comments；
and　Jocelyn　continued

'That　afternoon　I　idled　about　the　streets；　looking　for　her　in　vain。
When　I　next　saw　one　of　the　boys　who　had　been　with　me　at　her　first
passing　I　stealthily　reminded　him　of　the　incident；　and　asked　if　he　knew
the　riders。

'〃O　yes；〃　he　said。　　〃That　was　Colonel　Targe　and　his　daughter　Elsie。〃

'〃How　old　do　you　think　she　is？〃　said　I；　a　sense　of　disparity　in　our
ages　disturbing　my　mind。

'〃Onineteen；　I　think　they　say。　　She's　going　to　be　married　the　day
after　to…morrow　to　Captain　Popp；　of　the　501st；　and　they　are　ordered　off
to　India　at　once。〃

'The　grief　which　I　experienced　at　this　intelligence　was　such　that　at
dusk　I　went　away　to　the　edge　of　the　harbour；　intending　to　put　an　end　to
myself　there　and　then。　　But　I　had　been　told　that　crabs　had　been　found
clinging　to　the　dead　faces　of　persons　who　had　fallen　in　thereabout；
leisurely　eating　them；　and　the　idea　of　such　an　unpleasant　contingency
deterred　me。　　I　should　state　that　the　marriage　of　my　Beloved　concerned
me　little；　it　was　her　departure　that　broke　my　heart。　　I　never　saw　her
again。

'Though　I　had　already　learnt　that　the　absence　of　the　corporeal　matter
did　not　involve　the　absence　of　the　informing　spirit；　I　could　scarce
bring　myself　to　believe　that　in　this　case　it　was　possible　for　her　to
return　to　my　view　without　the　form　she　had　last　inhabited。

'But　she　did。

'It　was　not；　however；　till　after　a　good　space　of　time；　during　which　I
passed　through　that　bearish　age　in　boys；　their　early　teens；　when　girls
are　their　especial　contempt。　　I　was　about　seventeen；　and　was　sitting
one　evening　over　a　cup　of　tea　in　a　confectioner's　at　the　very　same
watering…place；　when　opposite　me　a　lady　took　her　seat　with　a　little
girl。　　We　looked　at　each　other　awhile；　the　child　made　advances；　till　I
said：　　〃She's　a　good　little　thing。〃

'The　lady　assented；　and　made　a　further　remark。

'〃She　has　the　soft　fine　eyes　of　her　mother；〃　said　I。

'〃Do　you　think　her　eyes　are　good？〃　asks　the　lady；　as　if　she　had　not
heard　what　she　had　heard　mostthe　last　three　words　of　my　opinion。

'〃Yesfor　copies；〃　said　I；　regarding　her。

'After　this　we　got　on　very　well。　　She　informed　me　that　her　husband　had
gone　out　in　a　yacht；　and　I　said　it　was　a　pity　he　didn't　take　her　with
him　for　the　airing。　　She　gradually　disclosed　herself　in　the　character
of　a　deserted　young　wife；　and　later　on　I　met　her　in　the　street　without
the　child。　　She　was　going　to　the　landing…stage　to　meet　her　husband；　so
she　told　me；　but　she　did　not　know　the　way。

'I　offered　to　show　her；　and　did　so。　　I　will　not　go　into　particulars；
but　I　afterwards　saw　her　several　times；　and　soon　discovered　that　the
Beloved　（as　to　whose　whereabouts　I　had　been　at　fault　so　long）　lurked
here。　　Though　why　she　had　chosen　this　tantalizing　situation　of　an
inaccessible　matron's　form　when　so　many　others　offered；　it　was　beyond
me　to　discover。　　The　whole　affair　ended　innocently　enough；　when　the
lady　left　the　town　with　her　husband　and　child：　　she　seemed　to　regard
our　acquaintance　as　a　flirtation；　yet　it　was　anything　but　a　flirtation
for　me！


　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　*　　　　　　　　　　*　　　　　　　　　　*


'Why　should　I　tell　the　rest　of　the　tantalizing　tale！　　After　this；　the
Well…Beloved　put　herself　in　evidence　with　greater　and　greater
frequency；　and　it　would　be　impossible　for　me　to　give　you　details　of　her
various　incarnations。　　She　came　nine　times　in　the　course　of　the　two　or
three　ensuing　years。　　Four　times　she　masqueraded　as　a　brunette；　twice
as　a　pale…haired　creature；　and　two　or　three　times　under　a　complexion
neither　light　nor　dark。　　Sometimes　she　was　a　tall；　fine　girl；　but　more
often；　I　think；　she　preferred　to　slip　into　the　skin　of　a　lithe　airy
being；　of　no　great　stature。　　I　grew　so　accustomed　to　these　exits　and
entrances　that　I　resigned　myself　to　them　quite　passively；　talked　to
her；　kissed　her；　corresponded　with　her；　ached　for　her；　in　each　of　her
several　guises。　　So　it　went　on　until　a　month　ago。　　And　then　for　the
first　time　I　was　puzzled。　　She　either　had；　or　she　had　not；　entered　the
person　of　Avice　Caro；　a　young　girl　I　had　known　from　infancy。　　Upon　the
whole；　I　have　decided　that；　after　all；　she　did　not　enter　the　form　of
Avice　Caro；　because　I　retain　so　great　a　respect　for　her　still。'

Pierston　here　gave　in　brief　the　history　of　his　revived　comradeship　with
Avice；　the　verge　of　the　engagement　to　which　they　had　reached；　and　its
unexpected　rupture　by　him；　merely　through　his　meeting　with　a　woman　into
whom　the　Well…Beloved　unmistakably　moved　under　his　very　eyesby　name
Miss　Marcia　Bencomb。　　He　described　their　spontaneous　decision　to　marry
offhand；　and　then　he　put　it　to　Somers　whether　he　ought　to　marry　or　not…
…her　or　anybody　elsein　such　circumstances。

'Certainly　not；'　said　Somers。