mark twain, a biography, 1835-1866-µÚ28²¿·Ö
°´¼üÅÌÉÏ·½Ïò¼ü ¡û »ò ¡ú ¿É¿ìËÙÉÏÏ·ҳ£¬°´¼üÅÌÉ쵀 Enter ¼ü¿É»Øµ½±¾ÊéĿ¼ҳ£¬°´¼üÅÌÉÏ·½Ïò¼ü ¡ü ¿É»Øµ½±¾Ò³¶¥²¿£¡
¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ªÎ´ÔĶÁÍꣿ¼ÓÈëÊéÇ©ÒѱãÏ´μÌÐøÔĶÁ£¡
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡and¡¡intelligentused¡¡good¡¡language£»¡¡and¡¡talks¡¡much¡¡faster¡¡than¡¡I
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡do¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡She¡¡invited¡¡me¡¡into¡¡the¡¡little¡¡back¡¡parlor£»¡¡closed¡¡the¡¡door£»¡¡and¡¡we
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡were¡¡alone¡£¡¡¡¡We¡¡sat¡¡down¡¡facing¡¡each¡¡other¡£¡¡¡¡Then¡¡she¡¡asked¡¡my¡¡age¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡Then¡¡she¡¡put¡¡her¡¡hands¡¡before¡¡her¡¡eyes¡¡a¡¡moment£»¡¡and¡¡commenced
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡talking¡¡as¡¡if¡¡she¡¡had¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal¡¡to¡¡say¡¡and¡¡not¡¡much¡¡time¡¡to¡¡say¡¡it
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡in¡£¡¡¡¡Something¡¡after¡¡this¡¡style£º
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'Madame¡£'¡¡¡¡Yours¡¡is¡¡a¡¡watery¡¡planet£»¡¡you¡¡gain¡¡your¡¡livelihood¡¡on¡¡the
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡water£»¡¡but¡¡you¡¡should¡¡have¡¡been¡¡a¡¡lawyerthere¡¡is¡¡where¡¡your
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡talents¡¡lie£»¡¡you¡¡might¡¡have¡¡distinguished¡¡yourself¡¡as¡¡an¡¡orator£»¡¡or
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡as¡¡an¡¡editor£»¡¡you¡¡have¡¡written¡¡a¡¡great¡¡deal£»¡¡you¡¡write¡¡wellbut
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡you¡¡are¡¡rather¡¡out¡¡of¡¡practice£»¡¡no¡¡matteryou¡¡will¡¡be¡¡in¡¡practice
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡some¡¡day£»¡¡you¡¡have¡¡a¡¡superb¡¡constitution£»¡¡and¡¡as¡¡excellent¡¡health¡¡as
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡any¡¡man¡¡in¡¡the¡¡world£»¡¡you¡¡have¡¡great¡¡powers¡¡of¡¡endurance£»¡¡in¡¡your
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡profession¡¡your¡¡strength¡¡holds¡¡out¡¡against¡¡the¡¡longest¡¡sieges
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡without¡¡flagging£»¡¡still£»¡¡the¡¡upper¡¡part¡¡of¡¡your¡¡lungs£»¡¡the¡¡top¡¡of
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡them£»¡¡is¡¡slightly¡¡affectedyou¡¡must¡¡take¡¡care¡¡of¡¡yourself£»¡¡you¡¡do
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡not¡¡drink£»¡¡but¡¡you¡¡use¡¡entirely¡¡too¡¡much¡¡tobacco£»¡¡and¡¡you¡¡must¡¡stop
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡it£»¡¡mind£»¡¡not¡¡moderate£»¡¡but¡¡stop¡¡the¡¡use¡¡of¡¡it£»¡¡totally£»¡¡then¡¡I¡¡can
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡almost¡¡promise¡¡you¡¡86£»¡¡when¡¡you¡¡will¡¡surely¡¡die£»¡¡otherwise£»¡¡look¡¡out
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡for¡¡28£»¡¡31£»¡¡34£»¡¡47£»¡¡and¡¡65£»¡¡be¡¡carefulfor¡¡you¡¡are¡¡not¡¡of¡¡a¡¡long¡
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡lived¡¡race£»¡¡that¡¡is£»¡¡on¡¡your¡¡father's¡¡side£»¡¡you¡¡are¡¡the¡¡only¡¡healthy
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡member¡¡of¡¡your¡¡family£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡only¡¡one¡¡in¡¡it¡¡who¡¡has¡¡anything¡¡like
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡the¡¡certainty¡¡of¡¡attaining¡¡to¡¡a¡¡great¡¡ageso£»¡¡stop¡¡using¡¡tobacco£»
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡and¡¡be¡¡careful¡¡of¡¡yourself¡£¡£¡£¡£¡¡¡¡In¡¡some¡¡respects¡¡you¡¡take¡¡after¡¡your
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡father£»¡¡but¡¡you¡¡are¡¡much¡¡more¡¡like¡¡your¡¡mother£»¡¡who¡¡belongs¡¡to¡¡the
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡long¡lived£»¡¡energetic¡¡side¡¡of¡¡the¡¡house¡£¡£¡£¡£¡¡¡¡You¡¡never¡¡brought¡¡all
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡your¡¡energies¡¡to¡¡bear¡¡upon¡¡any¡¡subject¡¡but¡¡what¡¡you¡¡accomplished¡¡it
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡for¡¡instance£»¡¡you¡¡are¡¡self¡made£»¡¡self¡educated¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'S¡£¡¡L¡£¡¡C¡£'¡¡¡¡Which¡¡proves¡¡nothing¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'Madame¡£'¡¡¡¡Don't¡¡interrupt¡£¡¡¡¡When¡¡you¡¡sought¡¡your¡¡present
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡occupation£»¡¡you¡¡found¡¡a¡¡thousand¡¡obstacles¡¡in¡¡your¡¡wayobstacles
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡unknownnot¡¡even¡¡suspected¡¡by¡¡any¡¡save¡¡you¡¡and¡¡me£»¡¡since¡¡you¡¡keep
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡such¡¡matter¡¡to¡¡yourselfbut¡¡you¡¡fought¡¡your¡¡way£»¡¡and¡¡hid¡¡the¡¡long
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡struggle¡¡under¡¡a¡¡mask¡¡of¡¡cheerfulness£»¡¡which¡¡saved¡¡your¡¡friends
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡anxiety¡¡on¡¡your¡¡account¡£¡¡¡¡To¡¡do¡¡all¡¡this¡¡requires¡¡the¡¡qualities
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡which¡¡I¡¡have¡¡named¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'S¡£¡¡L¡£¡¡C¡£'¡¡¡¡You¡¡flatter¡¡well£»¡¡Madame¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'Madame¡£'¡¡¡¡Don't¡¡interrupt¡£¡¡¡¡Up¡¡to¡¡within¡¡a¡¡short¡¡time¡¡you¡¡had
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡always¡¡lived¡¡from¡¡hand¡¡to¡¡mouthnow¡¡you¡¡are¡¡in¡¡easy¡¡circumstances
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡for¡¡which¡¡you¡¡need¡¡give¡¡credit¡¡to¡¡no¡¡one¡¡but¡¡yourself¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡turning¡
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡point¡¡in¡¡your¡¡life¡¡occurred¡¡in¡¡1840¡7¡8¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'S¡£¡¡L¡£¡¡C¡£'¡¡¡¡Which¡¡was£¿
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'Madame¡£'¡¡¡¡A¡¡death£»¡¡perhaps£»¡¡and¡¡this¡¡threw¡¡you¡¡upon¡¡the¡¡world¡¡and
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡made¡¡you¡¡what¡¡you¡¡are£»¡¡it¡¡was¡¡always¡¡intended¡¡that¡¡you¡¡should¡¡make
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡yourself£»¡¡therefore£»¡¡it¡¡was¡¡well¡¡that¡¡this¡¡calamity¡¡occurred¡¡as
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡early¡¡as¡¡it¡¡did¡£¡¡¡¡You¡¡will¡¡never¡¡die¡¡of¡¡water£»¡¡although¡¡your¡¡career
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡upon¡¡it¡¡in¡¡the¡¡future¡¡seems¡¡well¡¡sprinkled¡¡with¡¡misfortune¡£¡¡¡¡You
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡will¡¡continue¡¡upon¡¡the¡¡water¡¡for¡¡some¡¡time¡¡yet£»¡¡you¡¡will¡¡not¡¡retire
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡finally¡¡until¡¡ten¡¡years¡¡from¡¡now¡£¡£¡£¡£¡¡¡¡What¡¡is¡¡your¡¡brother's¡¡age£¿
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡23and¡¡a¡¡lawyer£¿¡¡¡¡and¡¡in¡¡pursuit¡¡of¡¡an¡¡office£¿¡¡¡¡Well£»¡¡he¡¡stands¡¡a
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡better¡¡chance¡¡than¡¡the¡¡other¡¡two£»¡¡and¡¡he¡¡may¡¡get¡¡it£»¡¡he¡¡is¡¡too
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡visionaryis¡¡always¡¡flying¡¡off¡¡on¡¡a¡¡new¡¡hobby£»¡¡this¡¡will¡¡never¡¡do
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡tell¡¡him¡¡I¡¡said¡¡so¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡is¡¡a¡¡good¡¡lawyera¡¡very¡¡good¡¡lawyerand¡¡a
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡fine¡¡speakeris¡¡very¡¡popular¡¡and¡¡much¡¡respected£»¡¡and¡¡makes¡¡many
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡friends£»¡¡but¡¡although¡¡he¡¡retains¡¡their¡¡friendship£»¡¡he¡¡loses¡¡their
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡confidence¡¡by¡¡displaying¡¡his¡¡instability¡¡of¡¡character¡£¡£¡£¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡land
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡he¡¡has¡¡now¡¡will¡¡be¡¡very¡¡valuable¡¡after¡¡a¡¡while
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'S¡£¡¡L¡£¡¡C¡£'¡¡¡¡Say¡¡250¡¡years¡¡hence£»¡¡or¡¡thereabouts£»¡¡Madame
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡'Madame¡£'¡¡¡¡Noless¡¡timebut¡¡never¡¡mind¡¡the¡¡land£»¡¡that¡¡is¡¡a
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡secondary¡¡considerationlet¡¡him¡¡drop¡¡that¡¡for¡¡the¡¡present£»¡¡and
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡devote¡¡himself¡¡to¡¡his¡¡business¡¡and¡¡politics¡¡with¡¡all¡¡his¡¡might£»¡¡for
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡he¡¡must¡¡hold¡¡offices¡¡under¡¡Government¡£¡£¡£¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡After¡¡a¡¡while¡¡you¡¡will¡¡possess¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal¡¡of¡¡propertyretire¡¡at
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡the¡¡end¡¡of¡¡ten¡¡yearsafter¡¡which¡¡your¡¡pursuits¡¡will¡¡be¡¡literary
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡try¡¡the¡¡lawyou¡¡will¡¡certainly¡¡succeed¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡am¡¡done¡¡now¡£¡¡¡¡If¡¡you
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡have¡¡any¡¡questions¡¡to¡¡askask¡¡them¡¡freelyand¡¡if¡¡it¡¡be¡¡in¡¡my
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡power£»¡¡I¡¡will¡¡answer¡¡without¡¡reservewithout¡¡reserve¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡I¡¡asked¡¡a¡¡few¡¡questions¡¡of¡¡minor¡¡importance¡paid¡¡her¡¡and¡¡left¡under
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡the¡¡decided¡¡impression¡¡that¡¡going¡¡to¡¡the¡¡fortune¡teller's¡¡was¡¡just
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡as¡¡good¡¡as¡¡going¡¡to¡¡the¡¡opera£»¡¡and¡¡cost¡¡scarcely¡¡a¡¡trifle¡¡more
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ergo£»¡¡I¡¡will¡¡disguise¡¡myself¡¡and¡¡go¡¡again£»¡¡one¡¡of¡¡these¡¡days£»¡¡when
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡other¡¡amusements¡¡fail¡£¡¡¡¡Now¡¡isn't¡¡she¡¡the¡¡devil£¿¡¡¡¡That¡¡is¡¡to¡¡say£»
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡isn't¡¡she¡¡a¡¡right¡¡smart¡¡little¡¡woman£¿
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡When¡¡you¡¡want¡¡money£»¡¡let¡¡Ma¡¡know£»¡¡and¡¡she¡¡will¡¡send¡¡it¡£¡¡¡¡She¡¡and
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡Pamela¡¡are¡¡always¡¡fussing¡¡about¡¡change£»¡¡so¡¡I¡¡sent¡¡them¡¡a¡¡hundred¡¡and
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡twenty¡¡quarters¡¡yesterdayfiddler's¡¡change¡¡enough¡¡to¡¡last¡¡till¡¡I
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡get¡¡back£»¡¡I¡¡reckon¡£
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡SAM¡£
In¡¡the¡¡light¡¡of¡¡preceding¡¡and¡¡subsequent¡¡events£»¡¡we¡¡must¡¡confess¡¡that
Madame¡¡Caprell¡¡was¡¡¡¨indeed¡¡a¡¡right¡¡smart¡¡little¡¡woman¡£¡¨¡¡¡¡She¡¡made
mistakes¡¡enough¡¡£¨the¡¡letter¡¡is¡¡not¡¡quoted¡¡in¡¡full£©£»¡¡but¡¡when¡¡we¡¡remember
that¡¡she¡¡not¡¡only¡¡gave¡¡his¡¡profession¡¡at¡¡the¡¡moment£»¡¡but¡¡at¡¡least
suggested¡¡his¡¡career¡¡for¡¡the¡¡future£»¡¡that¡¡she¡¡approximated¡¡the¡¡year¡¡of
his¡¡father's¡¡death¡¡as¡¡the¡¡time¡¡when¡¡he¡¡was¡¡thrown¡¡upon¡¡the¡¡world£»¡¡that
she¡¡admonished¡¡him¡¡against¡¡his¡¡besetting¡¡habit£»¡¡tobacco£»¡¡that¡¡she¡¡read¡£
minutely¡¡not¡¡only¡¡his¡¡characteristics£»¡¡but¡¡his¡¡brother¡¡Orion's£»¡¡that¡¡she
outlined¡¡the¡¡struggle¡¡in¡¡his¡¡conquest¡¡of¡¡the¡¡river£»¡¡that¡¡she¡¡seemingly
had¡¡knowledge¡¡of¡¡Orion's¡¡legal¡¡bent¡¡and¡¡his¡¡connection¡¡with¡¡the¡¡Tennessee
land£»¡¡all¡¡seems¡¡remarkable¡¡enough£»¡¡supposing£»¡¡of¡¡course£»¡¡she¡¡had¡¡no
material¡¡means¡¡of¡¡acquiring¡¡knowledgeone¡¡can¡¡never¡¡know¡¡certainly¡¡about
such¡¡things¡£
XXIX
THE¡¡END¡¡OF¡¡PILOTING
It¡¡is¡¡curious£»¡¡however£»¡¡that¡¡Madame¡¡Caprell£»¡¡with¡¡clairvoyant¡¡vision£»
should¡¡not¡¡have¡¡seen¡¡an¡¡important¡¡event¡¡then¡¡scarcely¡¡more¡¡than¡¡two
months¡¡distant£º¡¡the¡¡breaking¡out¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Civil¡¡War£»¡¡with¡¡the¡¡closing¡¡of
the¡¡river¡¡and¡¡the¡¡end¡¡of¡¡Mark¡¡Twain's¡¡career¡¡as¡¡a¡¡pilot¡£¡¡¡¡Perhaps¡¡these
things¡¡were¡¡so¡¡near¡¡as¡¡to¡¡be¡¡¡¨this¡¡side¡¨¡¡the¡¡range¡¡of¡¡second¡¡sight¡£
There¡¡had¡¡been¡¡plenty¡¡of¡¡war¡talk£»¡¡but¡¡few¡¡of¡¡the¡¡pilots¡¡believed¡¡that
war¡¡was¡¡really¡¡coming¡£¡¡¡¡Traveling¡¡that¡¡great¡¡commercial¡¡highway£»¡¡the
river£»¡¡with¡¡intercourse¡¡both¡¡of¡¡North¡¡and¡¡South£»¡¡they¡¡did¡¡not¡¡believe
that¡¡any¡¡political¡¡differences¡¡would¡¡be¡¡allowed¡¡to¡¡interfere¡¡with¡¡the
nation's¡¡trade£»¡¡or¡¡would¡¡be¡¡settled¡¡otherwise¡¡than¡¡on¡¡the¡¡street¡¡corners£»
in¡¡the¡¡halls¡¡of¡¡legislation£»¡¡and¡¡at¡¡the¡¡polls¡£¡¡¡¡True£»¡¡several¡¡States£»
including¡¡Louisiana£»¡¡had¡¡declared¡¡the¡¡Union¡¡a¡¡failure¡¡and¡¡seceded£»¡¡but
the¡¡majority¡¡of¡¡opinions¡¡were¡¡not¡¡clear¡¡as¡¡to¡¡how¡¡far¡¡a¡¡State¡¡had¡¡rights
in¡¡such¡¡a¡¡matter£»¡¡or¡¡as¡¡to¡¡what¡¡the¡¡real¡¡meaning¡¡of¡¡secession¡¡might¡¡be¡£
Comparatively¡¡few¡¡believed¡¡it¡¡meant¡¡war¡£¡¡¡¡Samuel¡¡Clemens¡¡had¡¡no¡¡such
belief¡£¡¡¡¡His¡¡Madame¡¡Caprell¡¡letter¡¡bears¡¡date¡¡of¡¡February¡¡6£»¡¡1861£»¡¡yet
contains¡¡no¡¡mention¡¡of¡¡war¡¡or¡¡of¡¡any¡¡special¡¡excitement¡¡in¡¡New¡¡Orleans
no¡¡forebodings¡¡as¡¡to¡¡national¡¡conditions¡£
Such¡¡things¡¡came¡¡soon¡¡enough£º¡¡President¡¡Lincoln¡¡was¡¡inaugurated¡¡on¡¡the
4th¡¡of¡¡March£»¡¡and¡¡six¡¡weeks¡¡later¡¡Fort¡¡Sumter¡¡was¡¡fired¡¡upon¡£¡¡¡¡Men¡¡began
to¡¡speak¡¡out¡¡then¡¡and¡¡to¡¡take¡¡sides¡£
It¡¡was¡¡a¡¡momentous¡¡time¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Association¡¡Rooms¡£¡¡¡¡There¡¡were¡¡pilots¡¡who
would¡¡go¡¡with¡¡the¡¡Union£»¡¡there¡¡were¡¡others¡¡who¡¡would¡¡go¡¡with¡¡the
Confederacy¡£¡¡¡¡Horace¡¡Bixby¡¡was¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡former£»¡¡and¡¡in¡¡due¡¡time¡¡became
chief¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Union¡¡River¡¡Service¡£¡¡¡¡Another¡¡pilot¡¡named¡¡Montgomery¡¡£¨Samuel
Clemens¡¡had¡¡once¡¡steered¡¡for¡¡him£©¡¡declared¡¡for¡¡the¡¡South£»¡¡and¡¡later
commanded¡¡the¡¡Confederate¡¡Mississippi¡¡fleet¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡were¡¡all¡¡good¡¡friends£»
and¡¡their¡¡discussions£»¡¡though¡¡warm£»¡¡were¡¡not¡¡always¡¡acrimonious£»¡¡but¡¡they
took¡¡sides¡£
A¡¡good¡¡many¡¡were¡¡not¡¡very¡¡clear¡¡as¡¡to¡¡their¡¡opinions¡£¡¡¡¡Living¡¡both¡¡North
and¡¡South¡¡as¡¡they¡¡did£»¡¡they¡¡saw¡¡various¡¡phases¡¡of¡¡the¡¡question¡¡and
divided¡¡their¡¡sympathies¡£¡¡¡¡Some¡¡were¡¡of¡¡one¡¡conviction¡¡one¡¡day¡¡and¡¡of
another¡¡the¡¡next¡£¡¡¡¡Samuel¡¡Clemens¡¡was¡¡of¡¡the¡¡less¡¡radical¡¡element¡£¡¡¡¡He
knew¡¡there¡¡was¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal¡¡to¡¡be¡¡said¡¡for¡¡either¡¡cause£»¡¡furthermore£»¡¡he
was¡¡not¡¡then¡¡bloodthirsty¡£¡¡¡¡A¡¡pilot¡house¡¡with¡¡its¡¡elevated¡¡position¡¡and
transparency¡¡seemed¡¡a¡¡poor¡¡place¡¡to¡¡be¡¡in¡¡when¡¡fighting¡¡was¡¡going¡¡on¡£
¡¨I'll¡¡think¡¡about¡¡it£»¡¨¡¡he¡¡said¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨I'm¡¡not¡¡very¡¡anxious¡¡to¡¡get¡¡up¡¡into¡¡a
glass¡¡perch¡¡and¡¡be¡¡shot¡¡at¡¡by¡¡either¡¡side¡£¡¡¡¡I'll¡¡go¡¡home¡¡and¡¡reflect¡¡on
the¡¡matter¡£¡¨
He¡¡did¡¡not¡¡realize¡¡it£»¡¡but¡¡he¡¡had¡¡made¡¡his¡¡last¡¡trip¡¡as¡¡a¡¡pilot¡£¡¡¡¡It¡¡is
rather¡¡curious¡¡that¡¡his¡¡final¡¡brief¡¡note¡book¡¡entry¡¡should¡¡begin¡¡with¡¡his
future¡¡nom¡¡de¡¡plumea¡¡memorandum¡¡of¡¡soundings¡¨mark¡¡twain£»¡¨¡¡and¡¡should
end¡¡with¡¡the¡¡words¡¡¡¨no¡¡lead¡£¡¨
He¡¡went¡¡up¡¡the¡¡river¡¡as¡¡a¡¡passenger¡¡on¡¡a¡¡steamer¡¡named¡¡the¡¡Uncle¡¡Sam¡£
Zeb¡¡Leavenworth¡¡was¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡pilots£»¡¡and¡¡Sam¡¡Clemens¡¡usually¡¡stood
watch¡¡with¡¡him¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡heard¡¡war¡talk¡¡all¡¡the¡¡way¡¡and¡¡saw¡¡preparations£»
but¡¡they¡¡were¡¡not¡¡molested£»¡¡though¡¡at¡¡Memphis¡¡they¡¡basely¡¡escaped¡¡the
blockade¡£¡¡¡¡At¡¡Cairo£»¡¡Illinois£»¡¡they¡¡saw¡¡soldiers¡¡drillingtroops¡¡later
commanded¡¡by¡¡Grant¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡Uncle¡¡Sam¡¡came¡¡steaming¡¡up¡¡toward¡¡St¡£¡¡Louis£»
those¡¡on¡¡board¡¡congratulating¡¡themselves¡¡on¡¡having¡¡come¡¡through
unscathed¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡were¡¡not¡¡quite¡¡through£»¡¡however¡£¡¡¡¡Abreast¡¡of¡¡Jefferson
Barracks¡¡they¡¡suddenly¡¡heard¡¡the¡¡boom¡¡of¡¡a¡¡cannon¡¡and¡¡saw¡¡a¡¡great¡¡whorl
of¡¡smoke¡¡drifting¡¡in¡¡their¡¡direction¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡did¡¡not¡¡realize¡¡that¡¡it¡¡was¡¡a
signala¡¡thunderous¡¡haltand¡¡kept¡¡straight¡¡on¡£¡¡¡¡Less¡¡than¡¡a¡¡minute
later¡¡there¡¡was¡¡another¡¡boom£»¡¡and¡¡a¡¡shell¡¡exploded¡¡directly¡¡in¡¡front¡¡of
the¡¡pilot¡house£»¡¡breaking¡¡a¡¡lot¡¡of¡¡glass¡¡and¡¡destroying¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal¡¡of
the¡¡upper¡¡decoration¡£¡¡¡¡Zeb¡¡Leavenworth¡¡fell¡¡back¡¡into¡¡a¡¡corner¡¡with¡¡a
yell¡£
¡¨Good¡¡Lord¡¡Almighty£¡¡¡¡¡Sam£»¡¨¡¡he¡¡said£»¡¡¡¨what¡¡do¡¡they¡¡mean¡¡by¡¡that£¿¡¨
Clemens¡¡stepped¡¡to¡¡the¡¡wheel¡¡and¡¡brought¡¡the¡¡boat¡¡around¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨I¡¡guess¡¡they
want¡¡us¡¡to¡¡wait¡¡a¡¡minute£»¡¡Zeb£»¡¨¡¡he¡¡said¡£
They¡¡were¡¡examined¡¡and¡¡passed¡£¡¡¡¡It¡¡was¡¡the¡¡last¡¡steamboat¡¡to¡¡make¡¡the
trip¡¡from¡¡New¡¡Orleans¡¡to¡¡St¡£¡¡Louis¡£¡¡¡¡Mark