zanoni-第58部分
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fertilises； and glows； and the wonder rather becomes how so few
regard it in its holiest nature。 What the sensual call its
enjoyments； are the least of its joys。 True love is less a
passion than a symbol。 Mejnour； shall the time come when I can
speak to thee of Viola as a thing that was？
。。。
Extract from Letter III。
Knowest thou that of late I have sometimes asked myself； 〃Is
there no guilt in the knowledge that has so divided us from our
race？〃 It is true that the higher we ascend the more hateful
seem to us the vices of the short…lived creepers of the earth；
the more the sense of the goodness of the All…good penetrates and
suffuses us； and the more immediately does our happiness seem to
emanate from him。 But； on the other hand； how many virtues must
lie dead in those who live in the world of death； and refuse to
die！ Is not this sublime egotism； this state of abstraction and
reverie；this self…wrapped and self…dependent majesty of
existence； a resignation of that nobility which incorporates our
own welfare； our joys； our hopes； our fears with others？ To live
on in no dread of foes； undegraded by infirmity； secure through
the cares； and free from the disease of flesh； is a spectacle
that captivates our pride。 And yet dost thou not more admire him
who dies for another？ Since I have loved her； Mejnour； it seems
almost cowardice to elude the grave which devours the hearts that
wrap us in their folds。 I feel it；the earth grows upon my
spirit。 Thou wert right； eternal age； serene and passionless； is
a happier boon than eternal youth； with its yearnings and
desires。 Until we can be all spirit； the tranquillity of
solitude must be indifference。
。。。
Extracts from Letter IV。
I have received thy communication。 What！ is it so？ Has thy
pupil disappointed thee？ Alas； poor pupil！ But
。。。
（Here follow comments on those passages in Glyndon's life already
known to the reader； or about to be made so； with earnest
adjurations to Mejnour to watch yet over the fate of his
scholar。）
。。。
But I cherish the same desire； with a warmer heart。 My pupil！
how the terrors that shall encompass thine ordeal warn me from
the task！ Once more I will seek the Son of Light。
。。。
Yes； Adon…Ai； long deaf to my call； at last has descended to my
vision； and left behind him the glory of his presence in the
shape of Hope。 Oh； not impossible； Viola；not impossible； that
we yet may be united； soul with soul！
Extract from Letter V。（Many months after the last。）
Mejnour； awake from thine apathy；rejoice！ A new soul will be
born to the world；a new soul that shall call me father。 Ah； if
they for whom exist all the occupations and resources of human
life；if they can thrill with exquisite emotion at the thought
of hailing again their own childhood in the faces of their
children； if in that birth they are born once more into the holy
Innocence which is the first state of existence； if they can feel
that on man devolves almost an angel's duty； when he has a life
to guide from the cradle； and a soul to nurture for the heaven；
what to me must be the rapture to welcome an inheritor of all the
gifts which double themselves in being shared！ How sweet the
power to watch； and to guard；to instil the knowledge； to avert
the evil； and to guide back the river of life in a richer and
broader and deeper stream to the paradise from which it flows！
And beside that river our souls shall meet； sweet mother。 Our
child shall supply the sympathy that fails as yet； and what shape
shall haunt thee； what terror shall dismay； when thy initiation
is beside the cradle of thy child！
CHAPTER 4。XI。
They thus beguile the way
Untill the blustring storme is overblowne；
When weening to returne whence they did stray；
They cannot finde that path which first was showne；
But wander to and fro in waies unknowne。
Spenser's 〃Faerie Queene；〃 book i。 canto i。 st。 x。
Yes； Viola； thou art another being than when； by the threshold of
thy Italian home； thou didst follow thy dim fancies through the
Land of Shadow； or when thou didst vainly seek to give voice to
an ideal beauty； on the boards where illusion counterfeits earth
and heaven for an hour； till the weary sense； awaking； sees but
the tinsel and the scene…shifter。 Thy spirit reposes in its own
happiness。 Its wanderings have found a goal。 In a moment there
often dwells the sense of eternity； for when profoundly happy； we
know that it is impossible to die。 Whenever the soul FEELS
ITSELF； it feels everlasting life。
The initiation is deferred；thy days and nights are left to no
other visions than those with which a contented heart enchants a
guileless fancy。 Glendoveers and Sylphs； pardon me if I question
whether those visions are not lovelier than yourselves。
They stand by the beach； and see the sun sinking into the sea。
How long now have they dwelt on that island？ What matters！it
may be months； or yearswhat matters！ Why should I； or they；
keep account of that happy time？ As in the dream of a moment
ages may seem to pass； so shall we measure transport or woe；by
the length of the dream； or the number of emotions that the dream
involves？
The sun sinks slowly down； the air is arid and oppressive； on the
sea； the stately vessel lies motionless； on the shore； no leaf
trembles on the trees。
Viola drew nearer to Zanoni。 A presentiment she could not define
made her heart beat more quickly； and； looking into his face； she
was struck with its expression： it was anxious； abstracted；
perturbed。 〃This stillness awes me；〃 she whispered。
Zanoni did not seem to hear her。 He muttered to himself； and his
eyes gazed round restlessly。 She knew not why； but that gaze；
which seemed to pierce into space；that muttered voice in some
foreign languagerevived dimly her earlier superstitions。 She
was more fearful since the hour when she knew that she was to be
a mother。 Strange crisis in the life of woman； and in her love！
Something yet unborn begins already to divide her heart with
that which had been before its only monarch。
〃Look on me； Zanoni；〃 she said； pressing his hand。
He turned： 〃Thou art pale； Viola； thy hand trembles！〃
〃It is true。 I feel as if some enemy were creeping near us。〃
〃And the instinct deceives thee not。 An enemy is indeed at hand。
I see it through the heavy air； I hear it through the silence：
the Ghostly One；the Destroyer； the PESTILENCE！ Ah； seest thou
how the leaves swarm with insects； only by an effort visible to
the eye。 They follow the breath of the plague！〃 As he spoke； a
bird fell from the boughs at Viola's feet； it fluttered； it
writhed an instant； and was dead。
〃Oh； Viola！〃 cried Zanoni； passionately； 〃that is death。 Dost
thou not fear to die？〃
〃To leave thee？ Ah； yes！〃
〃And if I could teach thee how Death may be defied； if I could
arrest for thy youth the course of time； if I could〃
He paused abruptly； for Viola's eyes spoke only terror； her cheek
and lips were pale。
〃Speak not thus；look not thus；〃 she said； recoiling from him。
〃You dismay me。 Ah； speak not thus； or I should tremble；no；
not for myself； but for thy child。〃
〃Thy child！ But wouldst thou reject for thy child the same
glorious boon？〃
〃Zanoni！〃
〃Well！〃
〃The sun has sunk from our eyes； but to rise on those of others。
To disappear from this world is to live in the world afar。 Oh；
lover；oh； husband！〃 she continued； with sudden energy； 〃tell me
that thou didst but jest；that thou didst but trifle with my
folly！ There is less terror in the pestilence than in thy
words。〃
Zanoni's brow darkened； he looked at her in silence for some
moments； and then said； almost severely ；
〃What hast thou known of me to distrust？〃
〃Oh； pardon； pardon！nothing！〃 cried Viola； throwing herself on
his breast； and bursting into tears。 〃I will not believe even
thine own words； if they seem to wrong thee！〃 He kissed the
tears from her eyes； but made no answer。
〃And ah！〃 she resumed； with an enchanting and child…like smile；
〃if thou wouldst give me a charm against the pestilence！ see； I
will take it from thee。〃 And she laid her hand on a small；
antique amulet that he wore on his breast。
〃Thou knowest how often this has made me jealous of the past；
surely some love…gift； Zanoni？ But no； thou didst not love the
giver as thou dost me。 Shall I steal thine amulet？〃
〃Infant！〃 said Zanoni； tenderly； 〃she who placed this round my
neck deemed it indeed a charm； for she had superstitions like
thyself； but to me it is more than the wizard's spell；it is the
relic of a sweet vanished time when none who loved me could
distrust。〃
He said these words in a tone of such melancholy reproach that it
went to the heart of Viola； but the tone changed into a solemnity
which chilled back the gush of her feelings as he resumed： 〃And
this； Viola； one day； perhaps； I will transfer from my breast to
thine； yes； whenever thou shalt comprehend me better；WHENEVER
THE LAWS OF OUR BEING SHALL BE THE SAME！〃
He moved on gently。 They returned slowly home； but fear still
was in the heart of Viola； though she strove to shake it off。
Italian and Catholic she was； with all the superstitions of land
and sect。 She stole to her chamber and prayed before a little
relic of San Gennaro； which the priest of her house had given to
her in childhood； and which had accompanied her in all her
wanderings。 She had never deemed it possible to part with it
before。 Now； if there was a charm against the pestilence； did
she fear the pestilence for herself？ The next morning； when he
awoke； Zanoni found the relic of the saint suspended with his
mystic amulet round his neck。
〃Ah！ thou wilt have nothing to fear from the pestilence now；〃
said Viola； between tears and
