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they　speak　to。



We　light　the　cigars；　and　hand　round　the　glasses　（which　are　very

temperately　used　indeed）；　and　the　conversation　begins　by　a　modest

amateur　reference　on　the　Editorial　part　to　the　swell　mob。

Inspector　Wield　immediately　removes　his　cigar　from　his　lips；　waves

his　right　hand；　and　says；　'Regarding　the　swell　mob；　sir；　I　can't　do

better　than　call　upon　Sergeant　Witchem。　　Because　the　reason　why？

I'll　tell　you。　　Sergeant　Witchem　is　better　acquainted　with　the

swell　mob　than　any　officer　in　London。'



Our　heart　leaping　up　when　we　beheld　this　rainbow　in　the　sky；　we

turn　to　Sergeant　Witchem；　who　very　concisely；　and　in　well…chosen

language；　goes　into　the　subject　forthwith。　　Meantime；　the　whole　of

his　brother　officers　are　closely　interested　in　attending　to　what　he

says；　and　observing　its　effect。　　Presently　they　begin　to　strike　in；

one　or　two　together；　when　an　opportunity　offers；　and　the

conversation　becomes　general。　　But　these　brother　officers　only　come

in　to　the　assistance　of　each　other　…　not　to　the　contradiction　…　and

a　more　amicable　brotherhood　there　could　not　be。　　From　the　swell

mob；　we　diverge　to　the　kindred　topics　of　cracksmen；　fences；　public…

house　dancers；　area…sneaks；　designing　young　people　who　go　out

'gonophing；'　and　other　'schools。'　　It　is　observable　throughout

these　revelations；　that　Inspector　Stalker；　the　Scotchman；　is　always

exact　and　statistical；　and　that　when　any　question　of　figures

arises；　everybody　as　by　one　consent　pauses；　and　looks　to　him。



When　we　have　exhausted　the　various　schools　of　Art　…　during　which

discussion　the　whole　body　have　remained　profoundly　attentive；

except　when　some　unusual　noise　at　the　Theatre　over　the　way　has

induced　some　gentleman　to　glance　inquiringly　towards　the　window　in

that　direction；　behind　his　next　neighbour's　back　…　we　burrow　for

information　on　such　points　as　the　following。　　Whether　there　really

are　any　highway　robberies　in　London；　or　whether　some　circumstances

not　convenient　to　be　mentioned　by　the　aggrieved　party；　usually

precede　the　robberies　complained　of；　under　that　head；　which　quite

change　their　character？　　Certainly　the　latter；　almost　always。

Whether　in　the　case　of　robberies　in　houses；　where　servants　are

necessarily　exposed　to　doubt；　innocence　under　suspicion　ever

becomes　so　like　guilt　in　appearance；　that　a　good　officer　need　be

cautious　how　he　judges　it？　　Undoubtedly。　　Nothing　is　so　common　or

deceptive　as　such　appearances　at　first。　　Whether　in　a　place　of

public　amusement；　a　thief　knows　an　officer；　and　an　officer　knows　a

thief　…　supposing　them；　beforehand；　strangers　to　each　other　…

because　each　recognises　in　the　other；　under　all　disguise；　an

inattention　to　what　is　going　on；　and　a　purpose　that　is　not　the

purpose　of　being　entertained？　　Yes。　　That's　the　way　exactly。

Whether　it　is　reasonable　or　ridiculous　to　trust　to　the　alleged

experiences　of　thieves　as　narrated　by　themselves；　in　prisons；　or

penitentiaries；　or　anywhere？　　In　general；　nothing　more　absurd。

Lying　is　their　habit　and　their　trade；　and　they　would　rather　lie　…

even　if　they　hadn't　an　interest　in　it；　and　didn't　want　to　make

themselves　agreeable　…　than　tell　the　truth。



From　these　topics；　we　glide　into　a　review　of　the　most　celebrated

and　horrible　of　the　great　crimes　that　have　been　committed　within

the　last　fifteen　or　twenty　years。　　The　men　engaged　in　the　discovery

of　almost　all　of　them；　and　in　the　pursuit　or　apprehension　of　the

murderers；　are　here；　down　to　the　very　last　instance。　　One　of　our

guests　gave　chase　to　and　boarded　the　emigrant　ship；　in　which　the

murderess　last　hanged　in　London　was　supposed　to　have　embarked。　　We

learn　from　him　that　his　errand　was　not　announced　to　the　passengers；

who　may　have　no　idea　of　it　to　this　hour。　　That　he　went　below；　with

the　captain；　lamp　in　hand　…　it　being　dark；　and　the　whole　steerage

abed　and　sea…sick　…　and　engaged　the　Mrs。　Manning　who　WAS　on　board；

in　a　conversation　about　her　luggage；　until　she　was；　with　no　small

pains；　induced　to　raise　her　head；　and　turn　her　face　towards　the

light。　　Satisfied　that　she　was　not　the　object　of　his　search；　he

quietly　re…embarked　in　the　Government　steamer　along…side；　and

steamed　home　again　with　the　intelligence。



When　we　have　exhausted　these　subjects；　too；　which　occupy　a

considerable　time　in　the　discussion；　two　or　three　leave　their

chairs；　whisper　Sergeant　Witchem；　and　resume　their　seat。　　Sergeant

Witchem；　leaning　forward　a　little；　and　placing　a　hand　on　each　of

his　legs；　then　modestly　speaks　as　follows：



'My　brother…officers　wish　me　to　relate　a　little　account　of　my

taking　Tally…ho　Thompson。　　A　man　oughtn't　to　tell　what　he　has　done

himself；　but　still；　as　nobody　was　with　me；　and；　consequently；　as

nobody　but　myself　can　tell　it；　I'll　do　it　in　the　best　way　I　can；　if

it　should　meet　your　approval。'



We　assure　Sergeant　Witchem　that　he　will　oblige　us　very　much；　and　we

all　compose　ourselves　to　listen　with　great　interest　and　attention。



'Tally…ho　Thompson；'　says　Sergeant　Witchem；　after　merely　wetting

his　lips　with　his　brandy…and…water；　'Tally…ho　Thompson　was　a　famous

horse…stealer；　couper；　and　magsman。　　Thompson；　in　conjunction　with

a　pal　that　occasionally　worked　with　him；　gammoned　a　countryman　out

of　a　good　round　sum　of　money；　under　pretence　of　getting　him　a

situation　…　the　regular　old　dodge　…　and　was　afterwards　in　the　〃Hue

and　Cry〃　for　a　horse　…　a　horse　that　he　stole　down　in　Hertfordshire。

I　had　to　look　after　Thompson；　and　I　applied　myself；　of　course；　in

the　first　instance；　to　discovering　where　he　was。　　Now；　Thompson's

wife　lived；　along　with　a　little　daughter；　at　Chelsea。　　Knowing　that

Thompson　was　somewhere　in　the　country；　I　watched　the　house　…

especially　at　post…time　in　the　morning　…　thinking　Thompson　was

pretty　likely　to　write　to　her。　　Sure　enough；　one　morning　the

postman　comes　up；　and　delivers　a　letter　at　Mrs。　Thompson's　door。

Little　girl　opens　the　door；　and　takes　it　in。　　We're　not　always　sure

of　postmen；　though　the　people　at　the　post…offices　are　always　very

obliging。　　A　postman　may　help　us；　or　he　may　not；　…　just　as　it

happens。　　However；　I　go　across　the　road；　and　I　say　to　the　postman；

after　he　has　left　the　letter；　〃Good　morning！　how　are　you？〃　　〃How

are　YOU！〃　says　he。　　〃You've　just　delivered　a　letter　for　Mrs。

Thompson。〃　　〃Yes；　I　have。〃　　〃You　didn't　happen　to　remark　what　the

post…mark　was；　perhaps？〃　　〃No；〃　says　he；　〃I　didn't。〃　　〃Come；〃　says

I；　〃I'll　be　plain　with　you。　　I'm　in　a　small　way　of　business；　and　I

have　given　Thompson　credit；　and　I　can't　afford　to　lose　what　he　owes

me。　　I　know　he's　got　money；　and　I　know　he's　in　the　country；　and　if

you　could　tell　me　what　the　post…mark　was；　I　should　be　very　much

obliged　to　you；　and　you'd　do　a　service　to　a　tradesman　in　a　small

way　of　business　that　can't　afford　a　loss。〃　　〃Well；〃　he　said；　〃I　do

assure　you　that　I　did　not　observe　what　the　post…mark　was；　all　I

know　is；　that　there　was　money　in　the　letter　…　I　should　say　a

sovereign。〃　　This　was　enough　for　me；　because　of　course　I　knew　that

Thompson　having　sent　his　wife　money；　it　was　probable　she'd　write　to

Thompson；　by　return　of　post；　to　acknowledge　the　receipt。　　So　I　said

〃Thankee〃　to　the　postman；　and　I　kept　on　the　watch。　　In　the

afternoon　I　saw　the　little　girl　come　out。　　Of　course　I　followed

her。　　She　went　into　a　stationer's　shop；　and　I　needn't　say　to　you

that　I　looked　in　at　the　window。　　She　bought　some　writing…paper　and

envelopes；　and　a　pen。　　I　think　to　myself；　〃That'll　do！〃　…　watch　her

home　again　…　and　don't　go　away；　you　may　be　sure；　knowing　that　Mrs。

Thompson　was　writing　her　letter　to　Tally…ho；　and　that　the　letter

would　be　posted　presently。　　In　about　an　hour　or　so；　out　came　the

little　girl　again；　with　the　letter　in　her　hand。　　I　went　up；　and

said　something　to　the　child；　whatever　it　might　have　been；　but　I

couldn't　see　the　direction　of　the　letter；　because　she　held　it　with

the　seal　upwards。　　However；　I　observed　that　on　the　back　of　the

letter　there　was　what　we　call　a　kiss　…　a　drop　of　wax　by　the　side　of

the　seal　…　and　again；　you　understand；　that　was　enough　for　me。　　I

saw　her　post　the　letter；　waited　till　she　was　gone；　then　went　into

the　shop；　and　asked　to　see　the　Master。　　When　he　came　out；　I　told

him；　〃Now；　I'm　an　Officer　in　the　Detective　Force；　there's　a　letter

with　a　kiss　been　posted　here　just　now；　for　a　man　that　I'm　in　search

of；　and　what　I　have　to　ask　of　you；　is；　that　you　will　let　me　look　at

the　direction　of　that　letter。〃　　He　was　very　civil　…　took　a　lot　of

letters　from　the　box　in　the　window　…　shook　'em　out　on　the　counter

with　the　faces　downwards　…　and　there　among　'em　was　the　identical

letter　with　the　kiss。　　It　was　directed；　Mr。　Thomas　Pigeon；　Post

Office；　B…；　to　be　left　till　called　for。　　Down　I　went　to　B…　（a

hundred　and　twenty　miles　or　so）　that　night。　　Early　next　morning　I

went　to　the　Post　Office；　saw　the　gentleman　in　charge　of　that

department；　told　him　who　I　was；　and　that　my　object　was　to　see；　and

track；　the　party　that　should　come　for　the　letter　for　Mr。　Thomas

Pigeon。　　He　was　very　polite；　and　said；　〃You　shall　have　every

assistance　we　can　give　you；　you　can　wait　inside　the　office；　and

we'll　take　care　to　let　you　know　when　anybody　comes　for　the　letter。〃

Well；　I　waited　there　three　days；　and　began　to　think　that　nobody

ever　WOULD　come。　　At　last　the　clerk　whispered　to　me；　〃Here！

Detective！　　Somebody's　come　for　the　letter！〃　　〃Keep　him　a　minute；〃

said　I；　and　I　ran　round　to　the　outside　of　the　office。　　There　I　saw

a　young　chap　with　the　appearance　of　an　Ostler；　holding　a　horse　by

the　bridle　…　stretching　the　bridle　across　the　pavement；　while　he

waited　at　the　Post　Office　Window　for　the　letter。　　I　began　to　pat

the　horse；　and　that；　and　I　said　to　the　boy；　〃Why；　this　is　Mr。

Jones's　Mare！〃　　〃No。　　It　an't。〃　　〃No？〃　said　I。　　〃She's　very　like

Mr。　Jones's　Mare！〃　　〃She　an't　Mr。　Jones's　Mare；　anyhow；〃　says　he。

〃It's　Mr。　So　and　So's；　of　the　Warwick　Arms。〃　　And　up　he　jumped；　and

off　he　went　…　letter　and　all。　　I　got　a　cab；　followed　on　the　box；

and　was　so　q