burlesques-第15部分
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Mordeky; and well known to every lover of 〃a prime sigaw and an
exlent cup of reel Moky Coffy for 6d。〃
The Constantinople Divann is greatly used by the foring gents of
Lester Squar。 I never ad the good fortn to pass down Pipping's
Buildings without seeing a haf a duzen of 'em on the threshole of
the extablishment; giving the street an oppertunity of testing the
odar of the Misses Mordeky's prime Avannas。 Two or three mor may
be visable inside; settn on the counter or the chestis; indulging
in their fav'rit whead; the rich and spisy Pickwhick; the ripe
Manilly; or the flagrant and arheumatic Qby。
〃These Divanns are; as is very well known; the knightly resott of
the young Henglish nobillaty。 It is ear a young Pier; after an
arjus day at the House of Commons; solazes himself with a glas of
gin…and…water (the national beveridge); with cheerful conversation
on the ewents of the day; or with an armless gaym of baggytell in
the back…parlor。〃
So wrote at least our friend Jools to his newspaper; the Horriflam;
and of this back…parlor and baggytell…bord; of this counter; of
this 〃Constantinople〃 Divan; he became almost as reglar a
frequenter as the plaster of Parish Turk who sits smoking a hookey
between the two blue coffee…cups in the winder。
I have oftin; smokin my own shroot in silents in a corner of the
Diwann; listened to Jools and his friends inwaying aginst Hingland;
and boastin of their own immortial country。 How they did go on
about Wellintun; and what an arty contamp they ad for him!how
they used to prove that France was the Light; the Scenter…pint; the
Igsample and hadmiration of the whole world! And though I scarcely
take a French paper now…a…days (I lived in early days as groom in a
French famly three years; and therefore knows the languidg);
though; I say; you can't take up Jools's paper; the Orriflam;
without readin that a minister has committed bribery and perjury;
or that a littery man has committed perjury and murder; or that a
Duke has stabbed his wife in fifty places; or some story equally
horrible; yet for all that it's admiral to see how the French gents
will swaggerhow they will be the scenters of civilizationhow
they will be the Igsamples of Europ; and nothink shall prevent 'em
knowing they will have it; I say I listen; smokin my pip in
silence。 But to our tail。
Reglar every evening there came to the 〃Constantanople〃 a young
gent etired in the igth of fashn; and indead presenting by the
cleanlyness of his appearants and linning (which was generally a
pink or blew shurt; with a cricketer or a dansuse pattern) rather a
contrast to the dinjy and whistkcard sosaity of the Diwann。 As for
wiskars; this young mann had none beyond a little yallow tought to
his chin; which you woodn notas; only he was always pulling at it。
His statue was diminnative; but his coschume supubb; for he had the
tippiest Jane boots; the ivoryheadest canes; the most gawjus
scarlick Jonville ties; and the most Scotch…plaidest trowseys; of
any customer of that establishment。 He was univusaly called
Milord。
〃Que est ce jeune seigneur? Who is this young hurl who comes
knightly to the 'Constantanople;' who is so proddigl of his gold
(for indeed the young gent would frequinly propoase gininwater to
the company); and who drinks so much gin?〃 asked Munseer Chacabac
of a friend from the 〃Hotel de l'Ail。〃
〃His name is Lord Yardham;〃 answered that friend。 〃He never comes
here but at nightand why?〃
〃Y?〃 igsclaimed Jools; istonisht。
〃Why? because he is engaygd all dayand do you know where he is
engaygd all day?〃
〃Where?〃 asked Jools。
〃At the Foring OfficeNOW do you begin to understand?〃Jools
trembled。
He speaks of his uncle; the head of that office。〃Who IS the head
of that offis?Palmerston。〃
〃The nephew of Palmerston!〃 said Jools; almost in a fit。
〃Lor Yardham pretends not to speak French;〃 the other went on。 〃He
pretends he can only say wee and commong porty voo。 Shallow
humbug!I have marked him during our conversations。When we have
spoken of the glory of France among the nations; I have seen his
eye kindle; and his perfidious lip curl with rage。 When they have
discussed before him; the Imprudents! the affairs of Europe; and
Raggybritchovich has shown us the next Circassian Campaign; or
Sapousne has laid hare the plan of the Calabrian patriots for the
next insurrection; I have marked this strangerthis Lor Yardham。
He smokes; 'tis to conceal his countenance; he drinks gin; 'tis to
hide his face in the goblet。 And be sure; he carries every word of
our conversation to the perfidious Palmerston; his uncle。〃
〃I will beard him in his den;〃 thought Jools。 〃I will meet him
corps…a…corpsthe tyrant of Europe shall suffer through his
nephew; and I will shoot him as dead as Dujarrier。〃
When Lor Yardham came to the 〃Constantanople〃 that night; Jools i'd
him savidgely from edd to foot; while Lord Yardham replied the
same。 It wasn't much for either to doneyther being more than 4
foot ten hiJools was a grannydear in his company of the Nashnal
Gard; and was as brayv as a lion。
〃Ah; l'Angleterre; l'Angleterre; tu nous dois une revanche;〃 said
Jools; crossing his arms and grinding his teeth at Lord Yardham。
〃Wee;〃 said Lord Yardham; 〃wee。〃
〃Delenda est Carthago!〃 howled out Jools。
〃Oh; wee;〃 said the Erl of Yardham; and at the same moment his glas
of ginawater coming in; he took a drink; saying; 〃A voternsanty;
Munseer:〃 and then he offered it like a man of fashn to Jools。
A light broak on Jools's mind as he igsepted the refreshmint。
〃Sapoase;〃 he said; 〃instedd of slaughtering this nephew of the
infamous Palmerston; I extract his secrets from him; suppose I pump
himsuppose I unveil his schemes and send them to my paper? La
France may hear the name of Jools de Chacabac; and the star of
honor may glitter on my bosom。〃
So axepting Lord Yardham's cortasy; he returned it by ordering
another glass of gin at his own expence; and they both drank it on
the counter; where Jools talked of the affaers of Europ all night。
To everything he said; the Earl of Yardham answered; 〃Wee; wee;〃
except at the end of the evening; when he squeeged his & and said;
〃Bong swore。〃
〃There's nothing like goin amongst 'em to equire the reel
pronounciation;〃 his lordship said; as he let himself into his
lodgings with his latch…key。 〃That was a very eloquent young gent
at the 'Constantinople;' and I'll patronize him。〃
〃Ah; perfide; je te demasquerai!〃 Jools remarked to himself as he
went to bed in his 〃Hotel de l'Ail。〃 And they met the next night;
and from that heavning the young men were continyually together。
Well; one day; as they were walking in the Quadrant; Jools talking;
and Lord Yardham saying; 〃Wee; wee;〃 they were struck all of a heap
by seeing
But my paper is igshosted; and I must dixcribe what they sor in the
nex number。
III。
THE CASTLE OF THE ISLAND OF FOGO。
The travler who pesews his dalitefle coarse through the fair rellum
of Franse (as a great romantic landskippist and neamsack of mind
would say) never chaumed his i's within a site more lovely; or vu'd
a pallis more magniffiznt than that which was the buthplace of the
Eroing of this Trew Tale。 Phansy a country through whose werdant
planes the selvery Garonne wines; likelike a benevvolent sarpent。
In its plasid busum antient cassles; picturask willidges; and
waving woods are reflected。 Purple hills; crownd with inteak
ruings; rivvilets babbling through gentle greenwoods; wight farm
ouses; hevvy with hoverhanging vines; and from which the appy and
peaseful okupier can cast his glans over goolden waving cornfealds;
and M。 Herald meddows in which the lazy cattle are graysinn; while
the sheppard; tending his snoughy flox; wiles away the leisure
mominx on his lootthese hoffer but a phaint pictur of the rurial
felissaty in the midst of widge Crinoline and Hesteria de Viddlers
were bawn。
Their Par; the Marcus de Viddlers; Shavilear of the Legend of Honor
and of the Lion of Bulgum; the Golden Flease; Grand Cross of the
Eflant and Castle; and of the Catinbagpipes of Hostria; Grand
Chamberleng of the Crownd; and Major…Genaril of Hoss…Mareens; &c。
&c。 &c。is the twenty…foth or fith Marquis that has bawn the
Tittle; is disended lenyally from King Pipping; and has almost as
antient a paddygree as any which the Ollywell Street frends of the
Member of Buckinumsheer can supply。
His Marchyniss; the lovely & ecomplisht Emily de St。 Cornichon;
quitted this mortial spear very soon after she had presented her
lord with the two little dawling Cherrybins above dixcribed; in
whomb; after the loss of that angle his wife; the disconslit
widderer found his only jy on huth。 In all his emusemints they
ecumpanied him; their edjacation was his sole bisniss; he atcheaved
it with the assistnce of the ugliest and most lernid masters; and
the most hidjus and egsimplary governices which money could
procure。 R; how must his peturnle art have bet; as these Budds;
which he had nurrisht; bust into buty; and twined in blooming
flagrance round his pirentle Busm!
The villidges all round his hancestral Alls blessed the Marcus and
his lovely hoffsprig。 Not one villidge in their naybrood but was
edawned by their elygint benifisns; and where the inhabitnts wern't
rendered appy。 It was a pattern pheasantry。 All the old men in
the districk were wertuous & tockative; ad red stockins and i…eeled
drab shoes; and beautiful snowy air。 All the old women had peaked
ats; and crooked cains; and chince gowns tucked into the pockits of
their quiltid petticoats; they sat in pictarask porches; pretendin
to spinn; while the lads and lassis of the villidges danst under
the hellums。 O; tis a noble sight to whitniss that of an appy
pheasantry! Not one of those rustic wassals of