the way of all flesh-第32部分

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Pontifex　spent　the　greater　part　of　her　holidays　in　London；　and　I
also　saw　her　at　Roughborough；　where　I　spent　a　few　days；　staying　at
the　〃Swan。〃　　I　heard　all　about　my　godson　in　whom；　however；　I　took
less　interest　than　I　said　I　did。　　I　took　more　interest　in　the　stage
at　that　time　than　in　anything　else；　and　as　for　Ernest；　I　found　him　a
nuisance　for　engrossing　so　much　of　his　aunt's　attention；　and　taking
her　so　much　from　London。　　The　organ　was　begun；　and　made　fair
progress　during　the　first　two　months　of　the　half　year。　　Ernest　was
happier　than　he　had　ever　been　before；　and　was　struggling　upwards。
The　best　boys　took　more　notice　of　him　for　his　aunt's　sake；　and　he
consorted　less　with　those　who　led　him　into　mischief。

But　much　as　Miss　Pontifex　had　done；　she　could　not　all　at　once　undo
the　effect　of　such　surroundings　as　the　boy　had　had　at　Battersby。
Much　as　he　feared　and　disliked　his　father　（though　he　still　knew　not
how　much　this　was）；　he　had　caught　much　from　him；　if　Theobald　had
been　kinder　Ernest　would　have　modelled　himself　upon　him　entirely；
and　ere　long　would　probably　have　become　as　thorough　a　little　prig　as
could　have　easily　been　found。

Fortunately　his　temper　had　come　to　him　from　his　mother；　who；　when
not　frightened；　and　when　there　was　nothing　on　the　horizon　which
might　cross　the　slightest　whim　of　her　husband；　was　an　amiable；　good…
natured　woman。　　If　it　was　not　such　an　awful　thing　to　say　of　anyone；
I　should　say　that　she　meant　well。

Ernest　had　also　inherited　his　mother's　love　of　building　castles　in
the　air；　andso　I　suppose　it　must　be　calledher　vanity。　　He　was
very　fond　of　showing　off；　and；　provided　he　could　attract　attention；
cared　little　from　whom　it　came；　nor　what　it　was　for。　　He　caught　up；
parrot…like；　whatever　jargon　he　heard　from　his　elders；　which　he
thought　was　the　correct　thing；　and　aired　it　in　season　and　out　of
season；　as　though　it　were　his　own。

Miss　Pontifex　was　old　enough　and　wise　enough　to　know　that　this　is
the　way　in　which　even　the　greatest　men　as　a　general　rule　begin　to
develop；　and　was　more　pleased　with　his　receptiveness　and
reproductiveness　than　alarmed　at　the　things　he　caught　and
reproduced。

She　saw　that　he　was　much　attached　to　herself；　and　trusted　to　this
rather　than　to　anything　else。　　She　saw　also　that　his　conceit　was　not
very　profound；　and　that　his　fits　of　self…abasement　were　as　extreme
as　his　exaltation　had　been。　　His　impulsiveness　and　sanguine
trustfulness　in　anyone　who　smiled　pleasantly　at　him；　or　indeed　was
not　absolutely　unkind　to　him；　made　her　more　anxious　about　him　than
any　other　point　in　his　character；　she　saw　clearly　that　he　would　have
to　find　himself　rudely　undeceived　many　a　time　and　oft；　before　he
would　learn　to　distinguish　friend　from　foe　within　reasonable　time。
It　was　her　perception　of　this　which　led　her　to　take　the　action　which
she　was　so　soon　called　upon　to　take。

Her　health　was　for　the　most　part　excellent；　and　she　had　never　had　a
serious　illness　in　her　life。　　One　morning；　however；　soon　after
Easter　1850；　she　awoke　feeling　seriously　unwell。　　For　some　little
time　there　had　been　a　talk　of　fever　in　the　neighbourhood；　but　in
those　days　the　precautions　that　ought　to　be　taken　against　the　spread
of　infection　were　not　so　well　understood　as　now；　and　nobody　did
anything。　　In　a　day　or　two　it　became　plain　that　Miss　Pontifex　had
got　an　attack　of　typhoid　fever　and　was　dangerously　ill。　　On　this　she
sent　off　a　messenger　to　town；　and　desired　him　not　to　return　without
her　lawyer　and　myself。

We　arrived　on　the　afternoon　of　the　day　on　which　we　had　been
summoned；　and　found　her　still　free　from　delirium：　　indeed；　the
cheery　way　in　which　she　received　us　made　it　difficult　to　think　she
could　be　in　danger。　　She　at　once　explained　her　wishes；　which　had
reference；　as　I　expected；　to　her　nephew；　and　repeated　the　substance
of　what　I　have　already　referred　to　as　her　main　source　of　uneasiness
concerning　him。　　Then　she　begged　me　by　our　long　and　close　intimacy；
by　the　suddenness　of　the　danger　that　had　fallen　on　her　and　her
powerlessness　to　avert　it；　to　undertake　what　she　said　she　well　knew；
if　she　died；　would　be　an　unpleasant　and　invidious　trust。

She　wanted　to　leave　the　bulk　of　her　money　ostensibly　to　me；　but　in
reality　to　her　nephew；　so　that　I　should　hold　it　in　trust　for　him
till　he　was　twenty…eight　years　old；　but　neither　he　nor　anyone　else；
except　her　lawyer　and　myself；　was　to　know　anything　about　it。　　She
would　leave　5000　pounds　in　other　legacies；　and　15；000　pounds　to
Ernestwhich　by　the　time　he　was　twenty…eight　would　have　accumulated
to；　say；　30；000　pounds。　　〃Sell　out　the　debentures；〃　she　said；　〃where
the　money　now　isand　put　it　into　Midland　Ordinary。〃

〃Let　him　make　his　mistakes；〃　she　said；　〃upon　the　money　his
grandfather　left　him。　　I　am　no　prophet；　but　even　I　can　see　that　it
will　take　that　boy　many　years　to　see　things　as　his　neighbours　see
them。　　He　will　get　no　help　from　his　father　and　mother；　who　would
never　forgive　him　for　his　good　luck　if　I　left　him　the　money
outright；　I　daresay　I　am　wrong；　but　I　think　he　will　have　to　lose　the
greater　part　or　all　of　what　he　has；　before　he　will　know　how　to　keep
what　he　will　get　from　me。〃

Supposing　he　went　bankrupt　before　he　was　twenty…eight　years　old；　the
money　was　to　be　mine　absolutely；　but　she　could　trust　me；　she　said；
to　hand　it　over　to　Ernest　in　due　time。

〃If；〃　she　continued；　〃I　am　mistaken；　the　worst　that　can　happen　is
that　he　will　come　into　a　larger　sum　at　twenty…eight　instead　of　a
smaller　sum　at；　say；　twenty…three；　for　I　would　never　trust　him　with
it　earlier；　andif　he　knows　nothing　about　it　he　will　not　be　unhappy
for　the　want　of　it。〃

She　begged　me　to　take　2000　pounds　in　return　for　the　trouble　I　should
have　in　taking　charge　of　the　boy's　estate；　and　as　a　sign　of　the
testatrix's　hope　that　I　would　now　and　again　look　after　him　while　he
was　still　young。　　The　remaining　3000　pounds　I　was　to　pay　in　legacies
and　annuities　to　friends　and　servants。

In　vain　both　her　lawyer　and　myself　remonstrated　with　her　on　the
unusual　and　hazardous　nature　of　this　arrangement。　　We　told　her　that
sensible　people　will　not　take　a　more　sanguine　view　concerning　human
nature　than　the　Courts　of　Chancery　do。　　We　said；　in　fact；　everything
that　anyone　else　would　say。　　She　admitted　everything；　but　urged　that
her　time　was　short；　that　nothing　would　induce　her　to　leave　her　money
to　her　nephew　in　the　usual　way。　　〃It　is　an　unusually　foolish　will；〃
she　said；　〃but　he　is　an　unusually　foolish　boy；〃　and　she　smiled　quite
merrily　at　her　little　sally。　　Like　all　the　rest　of　her　family；　she
was　very　stubborn　when　her　mind　was　made　up。　　So　the　thing　was　done
as　she　wished　it。

No　provision　was　made　for　either　my　death　or　Ernest'sMiss　Pontifex
had　settled　it　that　we　were　neither　of　us　going　to　die；　and　was　too
ill　to　go　into　details；　she　was　so　anxious；　moreover；　to　sign　her
will　while　still　able　to　do　so　that　we　had　practically　no
alternative　but　to　do　as　she　told　us。　　If　she　recovered　we　could　see
things　put　on　a　more　satisfactory　footing；　and　further　discussion
would　evidently　impair　her　chances　of　recovery；　it　seemed　then　only
too　likely　that　it　was　a　case　of　this　will　or　no　will　at　all。

When　the　will　was　signed　I　wrote　a　letter　in　duplicate；　saying　that
I　held　all　Miss　Pontifex　had　left　me　in　trust　for　Ernest　except　as
regards　5000　pounds；　but　that　he　was　not　to　come　into　the　bequest；
and　was　to　know　nothing　whatever　about　it　directly　or　indirectly；
till　he　was　twenty…eight　years　old；　and　if　he　was　bankrupt　before　he
came　into　it　the　money　was　to　be　mine　absolutely。　　At　the　foot　of
each　letter　Miss　Pontifex　wrote；　〃The　above　was　my　understanding
when　I　made　my　will；〃　and　then　signed　her　name。　　The　solicitor　and
his　clerk　witnessed；　I　kept　one　copy　myself　and　handed　the　other　to
Miss　Pontifex's　solicitor。

When　all　this　had　been　done　she　became　more　easy　in　her　mind。　　She
talked　principally　about　her　nephew。　　〃Don't　scold　him；〃　she　said；
〃if　he　is　volatile；　and　continually　takes　things　up　only　to　throw
them　down　again。　　How　can　he　find　out　his　strength　or　weakness
otherwise？　　A　man's　profession；〃　she　said；　and　here　she　gave　one　of
her　wicked　little　laughs；　〃is　not　like　his　wife；　which　he　must　take
once　for　all；　for　better　for　worse；　without　proof　beforehand。　　Let
him　go　here　and　there；　and　learn　his　truest　liking　by　finding　out
what；　after　all；　he　catches　himself　turning　to　most　habituallythen
let　him　stick　to　this；　but　I　daresay　Ernest　will　be　forty　or　five
and　forty　before　he　settles　down。　　Then　all　his　previous
infidelities　will　work　together　to　him　for　good　if　he　is　the　boy　I
hope　he　is。

〃Above　all；〃　she　continued；　〃do　not　let　him　work　up　to　his　full
strength；　except　once　or　twice　in　his　lifetime；　nothing　is　well　done
nor　worth　doing　unless；　take　it　all　round；　it　has　come　pretty
easily。　　Theobald　and　Christina　would　give　him　a　pinch　of　salt　and
tell　him　to　put　it　on　the　tails　of　the　seven　deadly　virtues；〃here
she　laughed　again　in　her　old　manner　at　once　so　mocking　and　so　sweet…
…〃I　think　if　he　likes　pancakes　he　had　perhaps　better　eat　them　on
Shrove　Tuesday；　but　this　is　enough。〃　　These　were　the　last　coherent
words　she　spoke。　　From　that　time　she　grew　continually　worse；　and　was
never　free　from　delirium　till　her　deathwhich　took　place　less　than
a　fortnight　afterwards；　to　the　inexpressible　grief　of　those　who　knew
and　loved　her。



CHAPTER　XXXVI



Letters　had　been　written　to　Miss　Pontifex's　brothers　and　sisters；
and　one　and　all　came　post…haste　to　Roughborough。　　Before　they
arrived　the　poor　lady　was　already　delirious；　and　for　the　sake　of　her
own　peace　at　the　last　I　am　half　glad　she　never　recovered
consciousness。

I　had　known　these　people　all　their　lives；　as　none　can　know　each
other　but　those　who　have　played　together　as　children；　I　knew　how
they　had　all　of　themperhaps　Theobald　least；　but　all　of　them　more
or　lessmade　her　life　a　burden　to　her　until　the　death　of　her　father
had　made　her　her　own　mistress；　and　I　was　displeased　at　their　coming
one　after　the　other　to　Roughborough；　and　inquiring　whether　their
sister　had　recovered　consciousness　sufficiently　to　be　able　to　see
them。　　It　was　known　that　she　had　sent　for　me　on　being　taken　ill；　and
that　I　remained　at　Roughborough；　and　I　ow