the little white bird-第3部分

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joyous　as　of　old　during　the　five　minutes　of　the　day　when　you　are

anything　to　me；　and　for　the　rest　of　the　time；　so　far　as　I　am

concerned；　you　may　be　as　wretched　as　you　list。　　Show　some

courage。　I　assure　you　he　must　be　a　very　bad　painter；　only　the

other　day　I　saw　him　looking　longingly　into　the　window　of　a　cheap

Italian　restaurant；　and　in　the　end　he　had　to　crush　down　his

aspirations　with　two　penny　scones。



You　can　do　better　than　that。　　Come；　Mary。



All　in　vain。　　She　wants　to　be　loved；　can't　do　without　love　from

morning　till　night；　never　knew　how　little　a　woman　needs　till　she

lost　that　little。　　They　are　all　like　this。



Zounds；　madam；　if　you　are　resolved　to　be　a　drooping　little　figure

till　you　die；　you　might　at　least　do　it　in　another　street。



Not　only　does　she　maliciously　depress　me　by　walking　past　on

ordinary　days；　but　I　have　discovered　that　every　Thursday　from　two

to　three　she　stands　afar　off；　gazing　hopelessly　at　the　romantic

post…office　where　she　and　he　shall　meet　no　more。　　In　these　windy

days　she　is　like　a　homeless　leaf　blown　about　by　passers…by。



There　is　nothing　I　can　do　except　thunder　at　William。



At　last　she　accomplished　her　unworthy　ambition。　　It　was　a　wet

Thursday；　and　from　the　window　where　I　was　writing　letters　I　saw

the　forlorn　soul　taking　up　her　position　at　the　top　of　the　street：

in　a　blast　of　fury　I　rose　with　the　one　letter　I　had　completed；

meaning　to　write　the　others　in　my　chambers。　　She　had　driven　me

from　the　club。



I　had　turned　out　of　Pall　Mall　into　a　side　street；　when　whom

should　I　strike　against　but　her　false　swain！　　It　was　my　fault；

but　I　hit　out　at　him　savagely；　as　I　always　do　when　I　run　into

anyone　in　the　street。　　Then　I　looked　at　him。　　He　was　hollow…eyed；

he　was　muddy；　there　was　not　a　haw　left　in　him。　　I　never　saw　a

more　abject　young　man；　he　had　not　even　the　spirit　to　resent　the

testy　stab　I　had　given　him　with　my　umbrella。　　But　this　is　the

important　thing：　he　was　glaring　wistfully　at　the　post…office　and

thus　in　a　twink　I　saw　that　he　still　adored　my　little　governess。　

Whatever　had　been　their　quarrel　he　was　as　anxious　to　make　it　up

as　she；　and　perhaps　he　had　been　here　every　Thursday　while　she　was

round　the　corner　in　Pall　Mall；　each　watching　the　post…office　for

an　apparition。　　But　from　where　they　hovered　neither　could　see　the

other。



I　think　what　I　did　was　quite　clever。　　I　dropped　my　letter　unseen

at　his　feet；　and　sauntered　back　to　the　club。　　Of　course；　a

gentleman　who　finds　a　letter　on　the　pavement　feels　bound　to　post

it；　and　I　presumed　that　he　would　naturally　go　to　the　nearest

office。



With　my　hat　on　I　strolled　to　the　smoking…room　window；　and　was

just　in　time　to　see　him　posting　my　letter　across　the　way。　　Then　I

looked　for　the　little　nursery　governess。　　I　saw　her　as　woe…begone

as　ever；　then；　suddenlyoh；　you　poor　little　soul；　and　has　it

really　been　as　bad　as　that！



She　was　crying　outright；　and　he　was　holding　both　her　hands。　　It

was　a　disgraceful　exhibition。　　The　young　painter　would　evidently

explode　if　he　could　not　make　use　of　his　arms。　　She　must　die　if

she　could　not　lay　her　head　upon　his　breast。　　I　must　admit　that　he

rose　to　the　occasion；　he　hailed　a　hansom。



〃William；〃　said　I　gaily；　〃coffee；　cigarette；　and　cherry　brandy。〃







As　I　sat　there　watching　that　old　play　David　plucked　my　sleeve　to

ask　what　I　was　looking　at　so　deedily；　and　when　I　told　him　he　ran

eagerly　to　the　window；　but　he　reached　it　just　too　late　to　see　the

lady　who　was　to　become　his　mother。　　What　I　told　him　of　her

doings；　however；　interested　him　greatly；　and　he　intimated　rather

shyly　that　he　was　acquainted　with　the　man　who　said；

〃Haw…haw…haw。〃　　On　the　other　hand；　he　irritated　me　by　betraying

an　idiotic　interest　in　the　two　children；　whom　he　seemed　to　regard

as　the　hero　and　heroine　of　the　story。　　What　were　their　names？　

How　old　were　they？　Had　they　both　hoops？　　Were　they　iron　hoops；　or

just　wooden　hoops？　Who　gave　them　their　hoops？



〃You　don't　seem　to　understand；　my　boy；〃　I　said　tartly；　〃that　had

I　not　dropped　that　letter；　there　would　never　have　been　a　little

boy　called　David　A。〃　　But　instead　of　being　appalled　by　this　he

asked；　sparkling；　whether　I　meant　that　he　would　still　be　a　bird

flying　about　in　the　Kensington　Gardens。



David　knows　that　all　children　in　our　part　of　London　were　once

birds　in　the　Kensington　Gardens；　and　that　the　reason　there　are

bars　on　nursery　windows　and　a　tall　fender　by　the　fire　is　because

very　little　people　sometimes　forget　that　they　have　no　longer

wings；　and　try　to　fly　away　through　the　window　or　up　the　chimney。



Children　in　the　bird　stage　are　difficult　to　catch。　　David　knows

that　many　people　have　none；　and　his　delight　on　a　summer　afternoon

is　to　go　with　me　to　some　spot　in　the　Gardens　where　these

unfortunates　may　be　seen　trying　to　catch　one　with　small　pieces　of

cake。



That　the　birds　know　what　would　happen　if　they　were　caught；　and

are　even　a　little　undecided　about　which　is　the　better　life；　is

obvious　to　every　student　of　them。　　Thus；　if　you　leave　your　empty

perambulator　under　the　trees　and　watch　from　a　distance；　you　will

see　the　birds　boarding　it　and　hopping　about　from　pillow　to

blanket　in　a　twitter　of　excitement；　they　are　trying　to　find　out

how　babyhood　would　suit　them。



Quite　the　prettiest　sight　in　the　Gardens　is　when　the　babies　stray

from　the　tree　where　the　nurse　is　sitting　and　are　seen　feeding　the

birds；　not　a　grownup　near　them。　　It　is　first　a　bit　to　me　and　then

a　bit　to　you；　and　all　the　time　such　a　jabbering　and　laughing　from

both　sides　of　the　railing。　　They　are　comparing　notes　and

inquiring　for　old　friends；　and　so　on；　but　what　they　say　I　cannot

determine；　for　when　I　approach　they　all　fly　away。



The　first　time　I　ever　saw　David　was　on　the　sward　behind　the

Baby's　Walk。　　He　was　a　missel…thrush；　attracted　thither　that　hot

day　by　a　hose　which　lay　on　the　ground　sending　forth　a　gay　trickle

of　water；　and　David　was　on　his　back　in　the　water；　kicking　up　his

legs。　　He　used　to　enjoy　being　told　of　this；　having　forgotten　all

about　it；　and　gradually　it　all　came　back　to　him；　with　a　number　of

other　incidents　that　had　escaped　my　memory；　though　I　remember

that　he　was　eventually　caught　by　the　leg　with　a　long　string　and　a

cunning　arrangement　of　twigs　near　the　Round　Pond。　　He　never　tires

of　this　story；　but　I　notice　that　it　is　now　he　who　tells　it　to　me

rather　than　I　to　him；　and　when　we　come　to　the　string　he　rubs　his

little　leg　as　if　it　still　smarted。



So　when　David　saw　his　chance　of　being　a　missel…thrush　again　he

called　out　to　me　quickly：　〃Don't　drop　the　letter！〃　and　there　were

tree…tops　in　his　eyes。



〃Think　of　your　mother；〃　I　said　severely。



He　said　he　would　often　fly　in　to　see　her。　　The　first　thing　he

would　do　would　be　to　hug　her。　　No；　he　would　alight　on　the　water…

jug　first；　and　have　a　drink。



〃Tell　her；　father；〃　he　said　with　horrid　heartlessness；　〃always　to

have　plenty　of　water　in　it；　'cos　if　I　had　to　lean　down　too　far　I

might　fall　in　and　be　drownded。〃



〃Am　I　not　to　drop　the　letter；　David？　　Think　of　your　poor　mother

without　her　boy！〃



It　affected　him；　but　he　bore　up。　　When　she　was　asleep；　he　said；

he　would　hop　on　to　the　frilly　things　of　her　night…gown　and　peck

at　her　mouth。



〃And　then　she　would　wake　up；　David；　and　find　that　she　had　only　a

bird　instead　of　a　boy。〃



This　shock　to　Mary　was　more　than　he　could　endure。　　〃You　can　drop

it；〃　he　said　with　a　sigh。　　So　I　dropped　the　letter；　as　I　think　I

have　already　mentioned；　and　that　is　how　it　all　began。





III



Her　Marriage；　Her　Clothes；　Her　Appetite；　and　an　Inventory　of　Her

Furniture



A　week　or　two　after　I　dropped　the　letter　I　was　in　a　hansom　on　my

way　to　certain　barracks　when　loud　above　the　city's　roar　I　heard

that　accursed　haw…haw…haw；　and　there　they　were；　the　two　of　them；

just　coming　out　of　a　shop　where　you　may　obtain　pianos　on　the　hire

system。　　I　had　the　merest　glimpse　of　them；　but　there　was　an

extraordinary　rapture　on　her　face；　and　his　head　was　thrown

proudly　back；　and　all　because　they　had　been　ordering　a　piano　on

the　hire　system。



So　they　were　to　be　married　directly。　　It　was　all　rather

contemptible；　but　I　passed　on　tolerantly；　for　it　is　only　when　she

is　unhappy　that　this　woman　disturbs　me；　owing　to　a　clever　way　she

has　at　such　times　of　looking　more　fragile　than　she　really　is。



When　next　I　saw　them；　they　were　gazing　greedily　into　the　window

of　the　sixpenny…halfpenny　shop；　which　is　one　of　the　most

deliciously　dramatic　spots　in　London。　　Mary　was　taking　notes

feverishly　on　a　slip　of　paper　while　he　did　the　adding　up；　and　in

the　end　they　went　away　gloomily　without　buying　anything。　　I　was

in　high　feather。　〃Match　abandoned；　ma'am；〃　I　said　to　myself；

〃outlook　hopeless；　another　visit　to　the　Governesses'　Agency

inevitable；　can't　marry　for　want　of　a　kitchen　shovel。〃　　But　I　was

imperfectly　acquainted　with　the　lady。



A　few　days　afterward　I　found　myself　walking　behind　her。　　There　is

something　artful　about　her　skirts　by　which　I　always　know　her；

though　I　can't　say　what　it　is。　　She　was　carrying　an　enormous

parcel　that　might　have　been　a　bird…cage　wrapped　in　brown　paper；

and　she　took　it　into　a　bric…a…brac　shop　and　came　out　without　it。

She　then　ran　rather　than　walked　in　the　direction　of　the　sixpenny…

halfpenny　shop。　　Now　mystery　of　any　kind　is　detestable　to　me；　and

I　went　into　the　bric…a…brac　shop；　ostensibly　to　look　at　the

cracked　china；　and　there；　still　on　the　counter；　with　the　wrapping

torn　off　it；　was　the　article　Mary　had　sold　in　order　to　furnish　on

the　proceeds。　　What　do　you　think　it　was？　　It　was　a　wonderful

doll's　house；　with　dolls　at　tea　downstairs　and　dolls　going　to　bed

upstairs；　and　a　doll　showing　a　doll　out　at　the　front　door。　

Loving　lips　had　long　ago　licked　most　of　the　paint　off；　but

otherwise　the　thing　was　in　admirable　preservation；　obviously　the

joy　of　Mary's　childhood；　it　had　now　been　sold　by　her　that　she

might　get　married。