armadale-第95部分

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his　conversation　with　Neelie　in　the　park。　The　anxiety　that　he
should　not　misjudge　her；　which　the　major's　daughter　had　so
earnestly　expressed；　placed　her　before　Allan's　eyes　in　an
irresistibly　attractive　characterthe　character　of　the　one
person　among　all　his　neighbors　who　had　some　respect　still　left
for　his　good　opinion。　Acutely　sensible　of　his　social　isolation；
now　that　there　was　no　Midwinter　to　keep　him　company　in　the　empty
house；　hungering　and　thirsting　in　his　solitude　for　a　kind　word
and　a　friendly　look；　he　began　to　think　more　and　more　regretfully
and　more　and　more　longingly　of　the　bright　young　face　so
pleasantly　associated　with　his　first　happiest　days　at　Thorpe
Ambrose。　To　be　conscious　of　such　a　feeling　as　this　was；　with　a
character　like　Allan's；　to　act　on　it　headlong；　lead　him　where　it
might。　He　had　gone　out　on　the　previous　morning　to　look　for　Neelie
with　a　peace…offering　of　flowers；　but　with　no　very　distinct　idea
of　what　he　should　say　to　her　if　they　met；　and　failing　to　find　her
on　the　scene　of　her　customary　walks；　he　had　characteristically
persisted　the　next　morning　in　making　a　second　attempt　with
another　peace…offering　on　a　larger　scale。　Still　ignorant　of　his
friend's　return；　he　was　now　at　some　distance　from　the　house；
searching　the　park　in　a　direction　which　he　had　not　tried　yet。

After　walking　out　a　few　hundred　yards　beyond　the　stables；　and
failing　to　discover　any　signs　of　Allan；　Midwinter　retraced　his
steps；　and　waited　for　his　friend's　return；　pacing　slowly　to　and
fro　on　the　little　strip　of　garden　ground　at　the　back　of　the
house。

From　time　to　time；　as　he　passed　it；　he　looked　in　absently　at　the
room　which　had　formerly　been　Mrs。　Armadale's；　which　was　now
（through　his　interposition）　habitually　occupied　by　her　sonthe
room　with　the　Statuette　on　the　bracket；　and　the　French　windows
opening　to　the　ground；　which　had　once　recalled　to　him　the　Second
Vision　of　the　Dream。　The　Shadow　of　the　Man；　which　Allan　had　seen
standing　opposite　to　him　at　the　long　window；　the　view　over　a　lawn
and　flower…garden；　the　pattering　of　the　rain　against　the　glass；
the　stretching　out　of　the　Shadow's　arm；　and　the　fall　of　the
statue　in　fragments　on　the　floorthese　objects　and　events　of　the
visionary　scene；　so　vividly　present　to　his　memory　once；　were　all
superseded　by　later　remembrances　now；　were　all　left　to　fade　as
they　might　in　the　dim　background　of　time。　He　could　pass　the　room
again　and　again；　alone　and　anxious；　and　never　once　think　of　the
boat　drifting　away　in　the　moonlight；　and　the　night's　imprisonment
on　the　Wrecked　Ship！

Toward　ten　o'clock　the　well…remembered　sound　of　Allan's　voice
became　suddenly　audible　in　the　direction　of　the　stables。　In　a
moment　more　he　was　visible　from　the　garden。　His　second　morning's
search　for　Neelie　had　ended　to　all　appearance　in　a　second　defeat
of　his　object。　The　nosegay　was　still　in　his　hand；　and　he　was
resignedly　making　a　present　of　it　to　one　of　the　coachman's
children。

Midwinter　impulsively　took　a　step　forward　toward　the　stables；　and
abruptly　checked　his　further　progress。

Conscious　that　his　position　toward　his　friend　was　altered　already
in　relation　to　Miss　Gwilt；　the　first　sight　of　Allan　filled　his
mind　with　a　sudden　distrust　of　the　governess's　influence　over
him；　which　was　almost　a　distrust　of　himself。　He　knew　that　he　had
set　forth　from　the　moors　on　his　return　to　Thorpe　Ambrose　with　the
resolution　of　acknowledging　the　passion　that　had　mastered　him；
and　of　insisting；　if　necessary；　on　a　second　and　a　longer　absence
in　the　interests　of　the　sacrifice　which　he　was　bent　on　making　to
the　happiness　of　his　friend。　What　had　become　of　that　resolution
now？　The　discovery　of　Miss　Gwilt's　altered　position；　and　the
declaration　that　she　had　voluntarily　made　of　her　indifference　to
Allan；　had　scattered　it　to　the　winds。　The　first　words　with　which
he　would　have　met　his　friend；　if　nothing　had　happened　to　him　on
the　homeward　way；　were　words　already　dismissed　from　his　lips。　He
drew　back　as　he　felt　it；　and　struggled；　with　an　instinctive
loyalty　toward　Allan；　to　free　himself　at　the　last　moment　from　the
influence　of　Miss　Gwilt。

Having　disposed　of　his　useless　nosegay；　Allan　passed　on　into　the
garden；　and　the　instant　he　entered　it　recognized　Midwinter　with　a
loud　cry　of　surprise　and　delight。

〃Am　I　awake　or　dreaming？〃　he　exclaimed；　seizing　his　friend
excitably　by　both　hands。〃　You　dear　old　Midwinter；　have　you　sprung
up　out　of　the　ground；　or　have　you　　dropped　from　the　clouds？〃

It　was　not　till　Midwinter　had　explained　the　mystery　of　his
unexpec　ted　appearance　in　every　particular　that　Allan　could　be
prevailed　on　to　say　a　word　about　himself。　When　he　did　speak；　he
shook　his　head　ruefully；　and　subdued　the　hearty　loudness　of　his
voice；　with　a　preliminary　look　round　to　see　if　the　servants　were
within　hearing。

〃I've　learned　to　be　cautious　since　you　went　away　and　left　me；〃
said　Allan。　〃My　dear　fellow；　you　haven't　the　least　notion　what
things　have　happened；　and　what　an　awful　scrape　I'm　in　at　this
very　moment！〃

〃You　are　mistaken；　Allan。　I　have　heard　more　of　what　has　happened
than　you　suppose。〃

〃What！　the　dreadful　mess　I'm　in　with　Miss　Gwilt？　the　row　with　the
major？　the　infernal　scandal…mongering　in　the　neighborhood？　You
don't　mean　to　say？〃

〃Yes；〃　interposed　Midwinter；　quietly；　〃I　have　heard　of　it　all。〃

〃Good　heavens！　how？　Did　you　stop　at　Thorpe　Ambrose　on　your　way
back？　Have　you　been　in　the　coffee…room　at　the　hotel？　Have　you　met
Pedgift？　Have　you　dropped　into　the　Reading　Rooms；　and　seen　what
they　call　the　freedom　of　the　press　in　the　town　newspaper？〃

Midwinter　paused　before　he　answered；　and　looked　up　at　the　sky。
The　clouds　had　been　gathering　unnoticed　over　their　heads；　and　the
first　rain…drops　were　beginning　to　fall。

〃Come　in　here；〃　said　Allan。　〃We'll　go　up　to　breakfast　this　way。　〃
He　led　Midwinter　through　the　open　French　window　into　his　own
sitting…room。　The　wind　blew　toward　that　side　of　the　house；　and
the　rain　followed　them　in。　Midwinter；　who　was　last；　turned　and
closed　the　window。

Allan　was　too　eager　for　the　answer　which　the　weather　had
interrupted　to　wait　for　it　till　they　reached　the　breakfast…room。
He　stopped　close　at　the　window；　and　added　two　more　to　his　string
of　questions。

〃How　can　you　possibly　have　heard　about　me　and　Miss　Gwilt？〃　he
asked。　〃Who　told　you？〃

〃Miss　Gwilt　herself；〃　replied　Midwinter；　gravely。

Allan's　manner　changed　the　moment　the　governess's　name　passed　his
friend's　lips。

〃I　wish　you　had　heard　my　story　first；〃　he　said。　〃Where　did　you
meet　with　Miss　Gwilt？〃

There　was　a　momentary　pause。　They　both　stood　still　at　the　window；
absorbed　in　the　interest　of　the　moment。　They　both　forgot　that
their　contemplated　place　of　shelter　from　the　rain　had　been　the
breakfast…room　upstairs。

〃Before　I　answer　your　question；〃　said　Midwinter；　a　little
constrainedly；　〃I　want　to　ask　you　something；　Allan；　on　my　side。
Is　it　really　true　that　you　are　in　some　way　concerned　in　Miss
Gwilt's　leaving　Major　Milroy's　service？〃

There　was　another　pause。　The　disturbance　which　had　begun　to
appear　in　Allan's　manner　palpably　increased。

〃It's　rather　a　long　story；〃　he　began。　〃I　have　been　taken　in；
Midwinter。　I've　been　imposed　on　by　a　person；　whoI　can't　help
saying　itwho　cheated　me　into　promising　what　I　oughtn't　to　have
promised；　and　doing　what　I　had　better　not　have　done。　It　isn't
breaking　my　promise　to　tell　you。　I　can　trust　in　your　discretion；
can't　I？　You　will　never　say　a　word；　will　you？〃

〃Stop！〃　said　Midwinter。　〃Don't　trust　me　with　any　secrets　which
are　not　your　own。　If　you　have　given　a　promise；　don't　trifle　with
it；　even　in　speaking　to　such　an　intimate　friend　as　I　am。〃　He　laid
his　hand　gently　and　kindly　on　Allan's　shoulder。　〃I　can't　help
seeing　that　I　have　made　you　a　little　uncomfortable；〃　he　went　on。
〃I　can't　help　seeing　that　my　question　is　not　so　easy　a　one　to
answer　as　I　had　hoped　and　supposed。　Shall　we　wait　a　little？　Shall
we　go　upstairs　and　breakfast　first？〃

Allan　was　far　too　earnestly　bent　on　presenting　his　conduct　to　his
friend　in　the　right　aspect　to　heed　Midwinter's　suggestion。　He
spoke　eagerly　on　the　instant；　without　moving　from　the　window。

〃My　dear　fellow；　it's　a　perfectly　easy　question　to　answer。
Only〃he　hesitated〃only　it　requires　what　I'm　a　bad　hand　at：　it
requires　an　explanation。〃

〃Do　you　mean；〃　asked　Midwinter；　more　seriously；　but　not　less
gently　than　before；　〃that　you　must　first　justify　yourself；　and
then　answer　my　question？〃

〃That's　it！〃　said　Allan；　with　an　air　of　relief。　〃You're　hit　the
right　nail　on　the　head；　just　as　usual。〃

Midwinter's　face　darkened　for　the　first　time。　〃I　am　sorry　to　hear
it；〃　he　said；　his　voice　sinking　low；　and　his　eyes　dropping　to　the
ground　as　he　spoke。

The　rain　was　beginning　to　fall　thickly。　It　swept　across　the
garden；　straight　on　the　closed　windows；　and　pattered　heavily
against　the　glass。

〃Sorry！〃　repeated　Allan。　〃My　dear　fellow；　you　haven't　heard　the
particulars　yet。　Wait　till　I　explain　the　thing　first。〃

〃You　are　a　bad　hand　at　explanations；〃　said　Midwinter；　repeating
Allan's　own　words。　〃Don't　place　yourself　at　a　disadvantage。　Don't
explain　it。〃

Allan　looked　at　him；　in　silent　perplexity　and　surprise。

〃You　are　my　friendmy　best　and　dearest　friend；〃　Midwinter　went
on。　〃I　can't　bear　to　let　you　justify　yourself　to　me　as　if　I　was
your　judge；　or　as　if　I　doubted　you。〃　He　looked　up　again　at　Allan
frankly　and　kindly　as　he　said　those　words。　〃Besides；〃　he　resumed；
〃I　think；　if　I　look　into　my　memory；　I　can　anticipate　your
explanation。　We　had　a　moment's　talk；　before　I　went　away；　about
some　very　delicate　questions　which　you　proposed　putting　to　Major
Milroy。　I　remember　I　warned　you；　I　remember　I　had　my　misgivings。
Should　I　be　guessing　right　if　I　guessed　that　those　questions　have
been　in　some　way　the　means　of　leading　you　into　a　false　position？
If　it　is　true　that　you　have　been　concerned　in　Miss　Gwilt's
leaving　her　situation；　is　it　also　trueis　it　only　doing　you
justice　to　believethat　any　mischief　for　which　you　are
responsible　has　been　mischief　innocently　done？〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Allan；　speaking；　for　the　first　time；　a　little
constrainedly　on　his　side。　〃It　is　only　doing　me　justice　to　say
that。〃　He　stopped　and　began　drawing　lines　absently　with　his
f