the essays of montaigne, v17-第6部分

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much　for　the　better；　as　for　something　else？

The　public　favour　has　given　me　a　little　more　confidence　than　I　expected；
but　what　I　'most　fear　is；　lest　I　should　glut　the　world　with　my　writings；
I　had　rather；　of　the　two；　pique　my　reader　than　tire　him；　as　a　learned　man
of　my　time　has　done。　　Praise　is　always　pleasing；　let　it　come　from　whom；
or　upon　what　account　it　will；　yet　ought　a　man　to　understand　why　he　is
commended；　that　he　may　know　how　to　keep　up　the　same　reputation　still：
imperfections　themselves　may　get　commendation。　　The　vulgar　and　common
estimation　is　seldom　happy　in　hitting；　and　I　am　much　mistaken　if；　amongst
the　writings　of　my　time；　the　worst　are　not　those　which　have　most　gained
the　popular　applause。　　For　my　part；　I　return　my　thanks　to　those　good…
natured　men　who　are　pleased　to　take　my　weak　endeavours　in　good　part；　the
faults　of　the　workmanship　are　nowhere　so　apparent　as　in　a　matter　which　of
itself　has　no　recommendation。　　Blame　not　me；　reader；　for　those　that　slip
in　here　by　the　fancy　or　inadvertency　of　others；　every　hand；　every
artisan；　contribute　their　own　materials；　I　neither　concern　myself　with
orthography　（and　only　care　to　have　it　after　the　old　way）　nor　pointing；
being　very　inexpert　both　in　the　one　and　the　other。　　Where　they　wholly
break　the　sense；　I　am　very　little　concerned；　for　they　at　least　discharge
me；　but　where　they　substitute　a　false　one；　as　they　so　often　do；　and　wrest
me　to　their　conception；　they　ruin　me。　　When　the　sentence；　nevertheless；
is　not　strong　enough　for　my　proportion；　a　civil　person　ought　to　reject　it
as　spurious；　and　none　of　mine。　　Whoever　shall　know　how　lazy　I　am；　and　how
indulgent　to　my　own　humour；　will　easily　believe　that　I　had　rather　write
as　many　more　essays；　than　be　tied　to　revise　these　over　again　for　so
childish　a　correction。

I　said　elsewhere；　that　being　planted　in　the　very　centre　of　this　new
religion；　I　am　not　only　deprived　of　any　great　familiarity　with　men　of
other　kind　of　manners　than　my　own；　and　of　other　opinions；　by　which　they
hold　together；　as　by　a　tie　that　supersedes　all　other　obligations；　but
moreover　I　do　not　live　without　danger；　amongst　men　to　whom　all　things　are
equally　lawful；　and　of　whom　the　most　part　cannot　offend　the　laws　more
than　they　have　already　done；　from　which　the　extremist　degree　of　licence
proceeds。　　All　the　particular　being　summed　up　together；　I　do　not　find　one
man　of　my　country；　who　pays　so　dear　for　the　defence　of　our　laws　both　in
loss　and　damages　（as　the　lawyers　say）　as　myself；　and　some　there　are　who
vapour　and　brag　of　their　zeal　and　constancy；　that　if　things　were　justly
weighed；　do　much　less　than　I。　　My　house；　as　one　that　has　ever　been　open
and　free　to　all　comers；　and　civil　to　all　（for　I　could　never　persuade
myself　to　make　it　a　garrison　of　war；　war　being　a　thing　that　I　prefer　to
see　as　remote　as　may　be）；　has　sufficiently　merited　popular　kindness；　and
so　that　it　would　be　a　hard　matter　justly　to　insult　over　me　upon　my　own
dunghill；　and　I　look　upon　it　as　a　wonderful　and　exemplary　thing　that　it
yet　continues　a　virgin　from　blood　and　plunder　during　so　long　a　storm；　and
so　many　neighbouring　revolutions　and　tumults。　　For　to　confess　the　truth；
it　had　been　possible　enough　for　a　man　of　my　complexion　to　have　shaken
hands　with　any　one　constant　and　continued　form　whatever；　but　the　contrary
invasions　and　incursions；　alternations　and　vicissitudes　of　fortune　round
about　me；　have　hitherto　more　exasperated　than　calmed　and　mollified　the
temper　of　the　country；　and　involved　me；　over　and　over　again；　with
invincible　difficulties　and　dangers。

I　escape；　'tis　true；　but　am　troubled　that　it　is　more　by　chance；　and
something　of　my　own　prudence；　than　by　justice；　and　am　not　satisfied　to　be
out　of　the　protection　of　the　laws；　and　under　any　other　safeguard　than
theirs。　　As　matters　stand；　I　live；　above　one　half；　by　the　favour　of
others；　which　is　an　untoward　obligation。　　I　do　not　like　to　owe　my　safety
either　to　the　generosity　or　affection　of　great　persons；　who　allow　me　my
legality　and　my　liberty；　or　to　the　obliging　manners　of　my　predecessors；
or　my　own：　for　what　if　I　were　another　kind　of　man？　　If　my　deportment；　and
the　frankness　of　my　conversation　or　relationship；　oblige　my　neighbours；
'tis　that　that　they　should　acquit　themselves　of　obligation　in　only
permitting　me　to　live；　and　they　may　say；　〃We　allow　him　the　free　liberty
of　having　divine　service　read　in　his　own　private　chapel；　when　it　is
interdicted　in　all　churches　round　about；　and　allow　him　the　use　of　his
goods　and　his　life；　as　one　who　protects　our　wives　and　cattle　in　time　of
need。〃　　For　my　house　has　for　many　descents　shared　in　the　reputation　of
Lycurgus　the　Athenian；　who　was　the　general　depository　and　guardian　of　the
purses　of　his　fellow…citizens。　　Now　I　am　clearly　of　opinion　that　a　man
should　live　by　right　and　by　authority；　and　not　either　by　recompense　or
favour。　　How　many　gallant　men　have　rather　chosen　to　lose　their　lives　than
to　be　debtors　for　them？　　I　hate　to　subject　myself　to　any　sort　of
obligation；　but　above　all；　to　that　which　binds　me　by　the　duty　of　honour。
I　think　nothing　so　dear　as　what　has　been　given　me；　and　this　because　my
will　lies　at　pawn　under　the　title　of　gratitude；　and　more　willingly　accept
of　services　that　are　to　be　sold；　I　feel　that　for　the　last　I　give　nothing
but　money；　but　for　the　other　I　give　myself。

The　knot　that　binds　me　by　the　laws　of　courtesy　binds　me　more　than　that　of
civil　constraint；　I　am　much　more　at　ease　when　bound　by　a　scrivener；　than
by　myself。　　Is　it　not　reason　that　my　conscience　should　be　much　more
engaged　when　men　simply　rely　upon　it？　　In　a　bond；　my　faith　owes　nothing；
because　it　has　nothing　lent　it；　let　them　trust　to　the　security　they　have
taken　without　me。　　I　had　much　rather　break　the　wall　of　a　prison　and　the
laws　themselves　than　my　own　word。　　I　am　nice；　even　to　superstition；　in
keeping　my　promises；　and；　therefore；　upon　all　occasions　have　a　care　to
make　them　uncertain　and　conditional。　　To　those　of　no　great　moment；　I　add
the　jealousy　of　my　own　rule；　to　make　them　weight；　it　wracks　and　oppresses
me　with　its　own　interest。　　Even　in　actions　wholly　my　own　and　free；　if　I
once　say　a　thing；　I　conceive　that　I　have　bound　myself；　and　that
delivering　it　to　the　knowledge　of　another；　I　have　positively　enjoined　it
my　own　performance。　　Methinks　I　promise　it；　if　I　but　say　it：　and
therefore　am　not　apt　to　say　much　of　that　kind。　　The　sentence　that　I　pass
upon　myself　is　more　severe　than　that　of　a　judge；　who　only　considers　the
common　obligation；　but　my　conscience　looks　upon　it　with　a　more　severe　and
penetrating　eye。　　I　lag　in　those　duties　to　which　I　should　be　compelled　if
I　did　not　go：

　　　　　〃Hoc　ipsum　ita　justum　est；　quod　recte　fit；　si　est　voluntarium。〃

　　　　　＇〃This　itself　is　so　far　just；　that　it　is　rightly　done；　if　it　is
　　　　　voluntary。〃Cicero；　De　Offic。；　i。　9。＇

If　the　action　has　not　some　splendour　of　liberty；　it　has　neither　grace　nor
honour：

　　　　　　　　　　〃Quod　vos　jus　cogit；　vix　voluntate　impetrent：〃

　　　　　＇〃That　which　the　laws　compel　us　to　do；　we　scarcely　do　with　a　will。〃
　　　　　Terence；　Adelph。；　iii。　3；　44。

where　necessity　draws　me；　I　love　to　let　my　will　take　its　own　course：

　　　　　　　　　　〃Quia　quicquid　imperio　cogitur；　exigenti　magis；
　　　　　　　　　　quam　praestanti；　acceptum　refertur。〃

　　　　　＇〃For　whatever　is　compelled　by　power；　is　more　imputed　to　him　that
　　　　　exacts　than　to　him　that　performs。〃Valerius　Maximus；　ii。　2；　6。＇

I　know　some　who　follow　this　rule；　even　to　injustice；　who　will　sooner　give
than　restore；　sooner　lend　than　pay；　and　will　do　them　the　least　good　to
whom　they　are　most　obliged。　　I　don't　go　so　far　as　that；　but　I'm　not　far
off。

I　so　much　love　to　disengage　and　disobligate　myself；　that　I　have　sometimes
looked　upon　ingratitudes；　affronts；　and　indignities　which　I　have　received
from　those　to　whom　either　by　nature　or　accident　I　was　bound　in　some　way
of　friendship；　as　an　advantage　to　me；　taking　this　occasion　of　their　ill…
usage；　for　an　acquaintance　and　discharge　of　so　much　of　my　debt。　　And
though　I　still　continue　to　pay　them　all　the　external　offices　of　public
reason；　I；　notwithstanding；　find　a　great　saving　in　doing　that　upon　the
account　of　justice　which　I　did　upon　the　score　of　affection；　and　am　a
little　eased　of　the　attention　and　solicitude　of　my　inward　will：

　　　　　〃Est　prudentis　sustinere；　ut　currum；　sic　impetum　benevolentia；〃

　　　　　＇〃'Tis　the　part　of　a　wise　man　to　keep　a　curbing　hand　upon　the
　　　　　impetus　of　friendship；　as　upon　that　of　his　horse。〃
　　　　　Cicero；　De　Amicit。；　c。　17。＇

'tis　in　me；　too　urging　and　pressing　where　I　take；　at　least；　for　a　man　who
loves　not　to　be　strained　at　all。　　And　this　husbanding　my　friendship
serves　me　for　a　sort　of　consolation　in　the　imperfections　of　those　in　whom
I　am　concerned。　　I　am　very　sorry　they　are　not　such　as　I　could　wish　they
were；　but　then　I　also　am　spared　somewhat　of　my　application　and　engagement
towards　them。　　I　approve　of　a　man　who　is　the　less　fond　of　his　child　for
having　a　scald　head；　or　for　being　crooked；　and　not　only　when　he　is　ill…
conditioned；　but　also　when　he　is　of　unhappy　disposition；　and　imperfect　in
his　limbs　（God　himself　has　abated　so　much　from　his　value　and　natural
estimation）；　provided　he　carry　himself　in　this　coldness　of　affection　with
moderation　and　exact　justice：　proximity；　with　me；　lessens　not　defects；
but　rather　aggravates　them。

After　all；　according　to　what　I　understand　in　the　science　of　benefit　and
acknowledgment；　which　is　a　subtle　science；　and　of　great　use；　I　know　no
person　whatever　more　free　and　less　indebted　than　I　am　at　this　hour。　　What
I　do　owe　is　simply　to　foreign　obligations　and　benefits；　as　to　anything
else；　no　man　is　more　absolutely　clear：

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　〃Nec　sunt　mihi　nota　potentum
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Munera。〃

　　　　　＇〃The　gifts　of　great　men　are　unknown　to　me。〃AEneid；　xii。　529。＇

Princes　give　me　a　great　deal　if　they　take　nothing　from　me；　and　do　me　good
enough　if　they　do　me　no　harm；　that's　all　I　ask　from　them。　　O　how　am　I
obliged　to　God；　that　he　has　been　pleased　I　should　immediately　receive
from　his　bounty　all　I　have；　and　specially　reserved　all　my　obligation　to
himself。　　How　earnestly　do　I　beg　of　his　holy　compassion　that　I　may　never
owe　essential　thanks　to　any　one。　　O　happy　liberty　wherein　I　have　thus　fa