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dreaded　the　ordeal；　but　she　was　willing　to　do　anything　that　was
thought　right；　and　likely　to　make　her　fitter　for　her　office。




CHAPTER　XIV。



'Twas　a　long　doubt；　we　never　heard
　　Exactly　how　the　ship　went　down。ARCHER　GURNEY。


The　tidings　came　at　last；　came　when　the　heart…sickness　of　hope
deferred　had　faded　into　the　worse　heart…sickness　of　fear　deferred；
and　when　spirits　had　been　fain　to　rebel；　and　declare　that　they　would
be　almost　glad　to　part　with　the　hope　that　but　kept　alive　despair。

The　Christmas　holidays　had　come　to　an　end；　and　the　home　party　were
again　alone；　when　early　in　the　forenoon；　there　was　a　tap　at　the
drawing…room　door；　and　Dr。　Spencer　called；　〃Ethel；　can　you　come　and
speak　to　me？〃

Margaret　started　as　if　those　gentle　tones　had　been　a　thunderclap。
〃Go！　go；　Ethel；〃　she　said；　〃don't　keep　me　waiting。〃

Dr。　Spencer　stood　in　the　hall　with　a　newspaper　in　his　hand。　　Ethel
said；　〃Is　it？〃　and　he　made　a　sorrowful　gesture。　　〃Both？〃　she　asked。

〃Both；〃　he　repeated。　　〃The　ship　burnedthe　boat　lost。〃

〃Ethel；　come！〃　hoarsely　called　Margaret。

〃Take　it；〃　said　Dr。　Spencer；　putting　the　paper　into　her　hand；　〃I　will
wait。〃

She　obeyed。　　She　could　not　speak；　but　kneeling　down　by　her　sister；
they　read　the　paragraph　together；　Ethel；　with　one　eye　on　the　words；
the　other　on　Margaret。

No　doubt　was　left。　　Captain　Gordon　had　returned；　and　this　was　his
official　report。　　The　names　of　the　missing　stood　below；　and　the　list
began　thus：

　　　　　　　　Lieutenant　A。　H。　Ernescliffe。
　　　　　　　　Mr。　Charles　Owen；　Mate。
　　　　　　　　Mr。　Harry　May；　Midshipman。

The　Alcestis　had　taken　fire　on　the　12th　of　April　of　the　former　year。
There　had　been　much　admirable　conduct；　and　the　intrepid　coolness　of
Mr。　Ernescliffe　was　especially　recorded。　　The　boats　had　been　put　off
without　loss；　but　they　were　scantily　provisioned；　and　the　nearest
land　was　far　distant。　　For　five　days　the　boats　kept　together；　then
followed　a　night　of　storms；　and；　when　morning　dawned；　the　second
cutter；　under　command　of　Mr。　Ernescliffe；　had　disappeared。　　There
could　be　no　doubt　that　she　had　sunk；　and　the　captain　could　only
record　his　regrets　for　the　loss　the　service　had　experienced　in　the
three　brave　young　officers　and　their　gallant　seamen。　　After　infinite
toil　and　suffering；　the　captain；　with　the　other　boats'　crews；　had
reached　Tahiti；　whence　they　had　made　their　way　home。

〃Oh；　Margaret；　Margaret！〃　cried　Ethel。

Margaret　raised　herself；　and　the　colour　came　into　her　face。

〃I　did　not　write　the　letter！〃　she　said。

〃What　letter？〃　said　Ethel；　alarmed。

〃Richard　prevented　me。　　The　letter　that　would　have　parted　us。　　Now
all　is　well。〃

〃All　is　well；　I　know；　if　we　could　but　feel　it。〃

〃He　never　had　the　pain。　　It　is　unbroken！〃　continued　Margaret；　her
eyes　brightening；　but　her　breath；　in　long…drawn　gasps　that　terrified
Ethel　into　calling　Dr。　Spencer。

Mary　was　standing　before　him；　with　bloodless　face　and　dilated　eyes；
but；　as　Ethel　approached；　she　turned　and　rushed　upstairs。

Dr。　Spencer　entered　the　drawing…room　with　Ethel；　who　tried　to　read
his　face　as　he　saw　Margaretrestored；　as　it　seemed；　to　all　her
girlish　bloom；　and　her　eyes　sparkling　as　they　were　lifted　up；　far
beyond　the　present　scene。　　Ethel　had　a　moment's　sense　that　his
expression　was　as　if　he　had　seen　a　death…blow　struck；　but　it　was　gone
in　a　moment；　as　he　gently　shook　Margaret　by　the　hand；　and　spoke　a
word　of　greeting；　as　though　to　recall　her。

〃Thank　you；〃　she　said；　with　her　own　grateful　smile。

〃Where　is　your　father？〃　he　asked　of　Ethel。

〃Either　at　the　hospital；　or　at　Mr。　Ramsden's；〃　said　Ethel；　with　a
ghastly　suspicion　that　he　thought　Margaret　in　a　state　to　require　him。

〃Papa！〃　said　Margaret。　　〃If　he　were　but　here！　　Butah！　I　had
forgotten。〃

She　turned　aside　her　head；　and　hid　her　face。　　Dr。　Spencer　signed
Ethel　nearer　to　him。　　〃This　is　a　more　natural　state；〃　he　said。
〃Don't　be　afraid　for　her。　　I　will　find　your　father；　and　bring　him
home。〃　　Pressing　her　hand　he　departed。

Margaret　was　weeping　tranquillyEthel　knelt　down　beside　her；　without
daring　at　first　to　speak；　but　sending　up　intense　mental　prayers　to
Him；　who　alone　could　bear　her　or　her　dear　father　through　their
affliction。　　Then　she　ventured　to　take　her　hand；　and　Margaret
returned　the　caress；　but　began　to　blame　herself　for　the　momentary
selfishness　that　had　allowed　her　brother's　loss　and　her　father's
grief　to　have　been　forgotten　in　her　own。　　Ethel's　〃oh！　no！　no！〃　did
not　console　her　for　this　which　seemed　the　most　present　sorrow；　but
the　flow　of　tears　was　so　gentle；　that　Ethel　trusted　that　they　were　a
relief。　　Ethel　herself　seemed　only　able　to　watch　her；　and　to　fear　for
her　father；　not　to　be　able　to　think　for　herself。

The　front　door　opened；　and　they　heard　Dr。　May's　step　hesitating　in
the　hall；　as　if　he　could　not　bear　to　come　in。

〃Go　to　him！〃　cried　Margaret；　wiping　off　her　tears。　　Ethel　stood　a
moment　in　the　doorway；　then　sprang　to　him；　and　was　clasped　in　his
arms。

〃You　know　it？〃　he　whispered。

〃Dr。　Spencer　told　us。　　Did　not　you　meet　him？〃

〃No。　　I　read　it　at　Bramshaw's　office。　　How〃　He　could　not　say　the
words；　but　he　looked　towards　the　room；　and　wrung　the　hand　he　held。

〃Quiet。　　Like　herself。　　Come。〃

He　threw　one　arm　round　Ethel；　and　laid　his　hand　on　her　head。　　〃How
much　there　is　to　be　thankful　for！〃　he　said；　then　advancing；　he　hung
over　Margaret；　calling　her　his　own　poor　darling。

〃Papa；　you　must　forgive　me。　　You　said　sending　him　to　sea　was　giving
him　up。〃

〃Did　I。　　Well；　Margaret；　he　did　his　duty。　　That　is　all　we　have　to
live　for。　　Our　yellow…haired　laddie　made　a　gallant　sailor；　and〃

Tears　choked　his　utteranceMargaret　gently　stroked　his　hand。

〃It　falls　hard　on　you；　my　poor　girl；〃　he　said。

〃No；　papa；〃　said　Margaret；　〃I　am　content　and　thankful。　　He　is　spared
pain　and　perplexity。〃

〃You　are　right；　I　believe；〃　said　Dr。　May。　　〃He　would　have　been
grieved　not　to　find　you　better。〃

〃I　ought　to　grieve　for　my　own　selfishness；〃　said　Margaret。　　〃I　cannot
help　it！　　I　cannot　be　sorry　the　link　is　unbroken；　and　that　he　had　not
to　turn　to　any　one　else。〃

〃He　never　would！〃　cried　Dr。　May；　almost　angrily。

〃I　tried　to　think　he　ought；〃　said　Margaret。　　〃His　life　would　have
been　too　dreary。　　But　it　is　best　as　it　is。〃

〃It　must　be；〃　said　the　doctor。　　〃Where　are　the　rest；　Ethel？　　Call
them　all　down。〃

Poor　Mary；　Ethel　felt　as　if　she　had　neglected　her！　　She　found　her
hanging　over　the　nursery　fire；　alternating　with　old　nurse　in　fond
reminiscences　of　Harry's　old　days；　sometimes　almost　laughing　at　his
pranks；　then　crying　again；　while　Aubrey　sat　between　them；　drinking　in
each　word。

Blanche　and　Gertrude　came　from　the　schoolroom；　where　Miss　Bracy
seemed　to　have　been　occupying　them；　with　much　kindness　and　judgment。
She　came　to　the　door　to　ask　Ethel　anxiously　for　the　doctor　and　Miss
May；　and　looked　so　affectionate　and　sympathising；　that　Ethel　gave　her
a　hearty　kiss。

〃Dear　Miss　Ethel！　if　you　can　only　let　me　help　you。〃

〃Thank　you；〃　said　Ethel　with　all　her　heart；　and　hurried　away。
Nothing　was　more　in　favour　of　Miss　Bracy；　than　that　there　should　be　a
hurry。　　Then　she　could　be　warm；　and　not　morbid。

Dr。　May　gathered　his　children　round　him；　and　took　out　the　great
Prayer…book。　　He　read　a　psalm　and　a　prayer　from　the　Burial　Service；
and　the　sentence　for　funerals　at　sea。　　Then　he　touched　each　of　their
heads；　and；　in　short　broken　sentences；　gave　thanks　for　those　still
left　to　him；　and　for　the　blessed　hope　they　could　feel　for　those　who
were　gone；　and　he　prayed　that　they　might　so　follow　in　their
footsteps；　as　to　come　to　the　same　holy　place；　and　in　the　meantime
realise　the　Communion　of　Saints。　　Then　they　said　the　Lord's　Prayer；
he　blessed　them；　and　they　arose。

〃Mary；　my　dear；〃　he　said；　〃you　have　a　photograph。〃

She　put　the　case　into　his　hands；　and　ran　away。

He　went　to　the　study；　where　he　found　Dr。　Spencer　awaiting　him。

〃I　am　only　come　to　know　where　I　shall　go　for　you。〃

〃Thank　you；　Spencer。　　Thank　you　for　taking　care　of　my　poor　girls。〃

〃They　took　care　of　themselves。　　They　have　the　secret　of　strength。〃

〃They　have〃　He　turned　aside；　and　burst　out；　〃Oh；　Spencer！　you　have
been　spared　a　great　deal。　　If　you　missed　a　great　deal　of　joy；　you
have　missed　almost　as　much　sorrow！〃　　And；　covering　his　face；　he　let
his　grief　have　a　free　course。

〃Dick！　dear　old　Dick；　you　must　bear　up。　　Think　what　treasures　you
have　left。〃

〃I　do。　　I　try　to　do　so；〃　said　poor　Dr。　May；　〃but；　Spencer；　you　never
saw　my　yellow…haired　laddie；　with　his　lion　look！　　He　was　the　flower
of　them　all！　　Not　one　of　these　other　boys　came　near　him　in　manliness；
and　with　such　a　loving　heart！　　An　hour　ago；　I　thought　any　certainty
would　be　gain；　but　now　I　would　give　a　lifetime　to　have　back　the　hope
that　I　might　see　my　boy's　face　again！　　Oh；　Spencer！　this　is　the　first
time　I　could　rejoice　that　his　mother　is　not　here！〃

〃She　would　have　been　your　comforter；〃　sighed　his　friend；　as　he　felt
his　inability　to　contend　with　such　grief。

〃There；　I　can　be　thankful；〃　Dr。　May　said；　and　he　looked　so。　　〃She　has
had　her　brave　loving　boy　with　her　all　this　time；　while　we　little
thoughtbut　there　are　others。　　My　poor　Margaret〃

〃Her　patience　must　be　blessed；〃　said　Dr。　Spencer。　　〃I　think　she　will
be　better。　　Now　that　the　suspense　no　longer　preys　on　her；　there　will
be　more　rest。〃

〃Rest；〃　repeated　Dr。　May；　supporting　his　head　on　his　hand；　and；
looking　up　dreamily〃there　remaineth　a　rest〃

The　large　Bible　lay　beside　him　on　the　table；　and　Dr。　Spencer　thought
that　he　would　find　more　rest　there　than　in　his　words。　　Leaving　him；
therefore；　his　friend　went　to　undertake　his　day's　work；　and　learn；
once　more；　in　the　anxious　inquiries　and　saddened　countenances　of　the
patients　and　their　friends；　how　great　an　amount　of　love　and　sympathy
that　Dr。　May　had　won　by　his　own　warmth　of　heart。　　The　patients　seemed
to　forget　their　complaints　in　sighs　for　their　kind　doctor's　troubles；
and　the　gouty　Mayor　of　Stoneborough　kept　Dr。　Spencer　half　an　hour　to
listen　to　his　recollections　of　the　bright…faced　boy's　droll　tricks；
and　then　to　the　praises　of　the　whole　May　family；　and　especially　of
the　mother。

Poor　Dr。　Spencer！　he　heard　her　accident　described　so　many　times　in
the　course　of　the　day；　that　his