the professor at the breakfast table-第34部分
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apparitions; no wonder that my imagination got excited; and I was
liable to superstitious fancies。
Jeremy Bentham's logic; by which he proved that he couldn't possibly
see a ghost is all very well…in the day…time。 All the reason in the
world will never get those impressions of childhood; created by just
such circumstances as I have been telling; out of a man's head。
That is the only excuse I have to give for the nervous kind of
curiosity with which I watch my little neighbor; and the obstinacy
with which I lie awake whenever I hear anything going on in his
chamber after midnight。
But whatever further observations I may have made must be deferred
for the present。 You will see in what way it happened that my
thoughts were turned from spiritual matters to bodily ones; and how
I got my fancy full of material images;faces; heads; figures;
muscles; and so forth;in such a way that I should have no chance
in this number to gratify any curiosity you may feel; if I had the
means of so doing。
Indeed; I have come pretty near omitting my periodical record this
time。 It was all the work of a friend of mine; who would have it
that I should sit to him for my portrait。 When a soul draws a body
in the great lottery of life; where every one is sure of a prize;
such as it is; the said soul inspects the said body with the same
curious interest with which one who has ventured into a 〃gift
enterprise〃 examines the 〃massive silver pencil…case〃 with the
coppery smell and impressible tube; or the 〃splendid gold ring〃 with
the questionable specific gravity; which it has been his fortune to
obtain in addition to his purchase。
The soul; having studied the article of which it finds itself
proprietor; thinks; after a time; it knows it pretty well。 But
there is this difference between its view and that of a person
looking at us:we look from within; and see nothing but the mould
formed by the elements in which we are incased; other observers look
from without; and see us as living statues。 To be sure; by the aid
of mirrors; we get a few glimpses of our outside aspect; but this
occasional impression is always modified by that look of the soul
from within outward which none but ourselves can take。 A portrait
is apt; therefore; to be a surprise to us。 The artist looks only
from without。 He sees us; too; with a hundred aspects on our faces
we are never likely to see。 No genuine expression can be studied by
the subject of it in the looking…glass。
More than this; he sees us in a way in which many of our friends or
acquaintances never see us。 Without wearing any mask we are
conscious of; we have a special face for each friend。 For; in the
first place; each puts a special reflection of himself upon us; on
the principle of assimilation you found referred to in my last
record; if you happened to read that document。 And secondly; each
of our friends is capable of seeing just so far; and no farther;
into our face; and each sees in it the particular thing that he
looks for。 Now the artist; if he is truly an artist; does not take
any one of these special views。 Suppose he should copy you as you
appear to the man who wants your name to a subscription…list; you
could hardly expect a friend who entertains you to recognize the
likeness to the smiling face which sheds its radiance at his board。
Even within your own family; I am afraid there is a face which the
rich uncle knows; that is not so familiar to the poor relation。 The
artist must take one or the other; or something compounded of the
two; or something different from either。 What the daguerreotype and
photograph do is to give the features and one particular look; the
very look which kills all expression; that of self…consciousness。
The artist throws you off your guard; watches you in movement and in
repose; puts your face through its exercises; observes its
transitions; and so gets the whole range of its expression。 Out of
all this he forms an ideal portrait; which is not a copy of your
exact look at any one time or to any particular person。 Such a
portrait cannot be to everybody what the ungloved call 〃as nat'ral
as life。〃 Every good picture; therefore; must be considered wanting
in resemblance by many persons。
There is one strange revelation which comes out; as the artist
shapes your features from his outline。 It is that you resemble so
many relatives to whom you yourself never had noticed any particular
likeness in your countenance。
He is at work at me now; when I catch some of these resemblances;
thus:
There! that is just the look my father used to have sometimes; I
never thought I had a sign of it。 The mother's eyebrow and grayish…
blue eye; those I knew I had。 But there is a something which
recalls a smile that faded away from my sister's lipshow many
years ago! I thought it so pleasant in her; that I love myself
better for having a trace of it。
Are we not young? Are we not fresh and blooming? Wait; a bit。 The
artist takes a mean little brush and draws three fine lines;
diverging outwards from the eye over the temple。 Five years。 The
artist draws one tolerably distinct and two faint lines;
perpendicularly between the eyebrows。 Ten years。 The artist
breaks up the contours round the mouth; so that they look a little
as a hat does that has been sat upon and recovered itself; ready; as
one would say; to crumple up again in the same creases; on smiling
or other change of feature。 Hold on! Stop that! Give a young
fellow a chance! Are we not whole years short of that interesting
period of life when Mr。 Balzac says that a man; etc。; etc。; etc。?
There now! That is ourself; as we look after finishing an article;
getting a three…mile pull with the ten…foot sculls; redressing the
wrongs of the toilet; and standing with the light of hope in our eye
and the reflection of a red curtain on our cheek。 Is he not a POET
that painted us?
〃Blest be the art that can immortalize!〃
COWPER。
Young folks look on a face as a unit; children who go to school
with any given little John Smith see in his name a distinctive
appellation; and in his features as special and definite an
expression of his sole individuality as if he were the first created
of his race: As soon as we are old enough to get the range of three
or four generations well in hand; and to take in large family
histories; we never see an individual in a face of any stock we
know; but a mosaic copy of a pattern; with fragmentary tints from
this and that ancestor。 The analysis of a face into its ancestral
elements requires that it should be examined in the very earliest
infancy; before it has lost that ancient and solemn look it brings
with it out of the past eternity; and again in that brief space when
Life; the mighty sculptor; has done his work; and Death; his silent
servant; lifts the veil and lets us look at the marble lines he has
wrought so faithfully; and lastly; while a painter who can seize all
the traits of a countenance is building it up; feature after
feature; from the slight outline to the finished portrait。
I am satisfied; that; as we grow older; we learn to look upon our
bodies more and more as a temporary possession and less and less as
identified with ourselves。 In early years; while the child 〃feels
its life in every limb;〃 it lives in the body and for the body to a
very great extent。 It ought to be so。 There have been many very
interesting children who have shown a wonderful indifference to the
things of earth and an extraordinary development of the spiritual
nature。 There is a perfect literature of their biographies; all
alike in their essentials; the same 〃disinclination to the usual
amusements of childhood 〃; the same remarkable sensibility; the same
docility; the same conscientiousness; in short; an almost uniform
character; marked by beautiful traits; which we look at with a
painful admiration。 It will be found that most of these children
are the subjects of some constitutional unfitness for living; the
most frequent of which I need not mention。 They are like the
beautiful; blushing; half…grown fruit that falls before its time
because its core is gnawed out。 They have their meaning;they do
not…live in vain;but they are windfalls。 I am convinced that many
healthy children are injured morally by being forced to read too
much about these little meek sufferers and their spiritual
exercises。 Here is a boy that loves to run; swim; kick football;
turn somersets; make faces; whittle; fish; tear his clothes; coast;
skate; fire crackers; blow squash 〃tooters;〃 cut his name on fences;
read about Robinson Crusoe and Sinbad the Sailor; eat the widest…
angled slices of pie and untold cakes and candies; crack nuts with
his back teeth and bite out the better part of another boy's apple
with his front ones; turn up coppers; 〃stick〃 knives; call names;
throw stones; knock off hats; set mousetraps; chalk doorsteps; 〃cut
behind 〃 anything on wheels or runners; whistle through his teeth;
〃holler〃 Fire! on slight evidence; run after soldiers; patronize an
engine…company; or; in his own words; 〃blow for tub No。 11;〃 or
whatever it may be;isn't that a pretty nice sort of a boy; though
he has not got anything the matter with him that takes the taste of
this world out? Now; when you put into such a hot…blooded; hard…
fisted; round…cheeked little rogue's hand a sad…looking volume or
pamphlet; with the portrait of a thin; white…faced child; whose life
is really as much a training for death as the last month of a
condemned criminal's existence; what does he find in common between
his own overflowing and exulting sense of vitality and the
experiences of the doomed offspring of invalid parents? The time
comes when we have learned to understand the music of sorrow; the
beauty of resigned suffering; the