white lies-第34部分
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f course; but I was sorry for him。 I could not help being。 He sighed so all the time; piteously。〃
Josephine turned pale; and lifted her hands in surprise and dismay。
〃Depend on it; Josephine; we are wrong;〃 said Rose; firmly: 〃these wretches will not stand our nonsense above a certain time: they are not such fools。 We are mismanaging: one gone; the other going; both losing faith in us。〃
Josephine's color returned to her cheek; and then mounted high。 Presently she smiled; a smile full of conscious power and furtive complacency; and said quietly; 〃He will not go。〃
Rose was pleased; but not surprised; to hear her sister speak so confidently; for she knew her power over Camille。 〃That is right;〃 said she; 〃go to him; and say two honest words: 'I bid you stay。'〃
〃O Rose! no!〃
〃Poltroon! You know he would go down on his knees; and stay directly。〃
〃No: I should blush all my life before you and him。 I COULD not。 I should let him go sooner; almost。 Oh; no! I will never ask a man to stay who wishes to leave me。 But just you go to him; and say Madame Raynal is going to take a little walk: will he do her the honor to be her companion? Not a word more; if you love me。〃
〃I'll go。 Hypocrite!〃
Josephine received Camille with a bright smile。 She seemed in unusually good spirits; and overflowing with kindness and innocent affection。 On this his high gloomy brow relaxed; and all his prospects brightened as by magic。 Then she communicated to him a number of little plans for next week and the week after。 Among the rest he was to go with her and Rose to Frejus。 〃Such a sweet place: I want to show it you。 You will come?〃
He hesitated a single moment: a moment of intense anxiety to the smiling Josephine。
〃Yes! he would come: it was a great temptation; he saw so little of her。〃
〃Well; you will see more of me now。〃
〃Shall I see you every dayalone; I mean?〃
〃Oh; yes; if you wish it;〃 replied Josephine; in an off…hand; indifferent way。
He seized her hand and devoured it with kisses。 〃Foolish thing!〃 murmured she; looking down on him with ineffable tenderness。 〃Should I not be always with you if I consulted my inclination?let me go。〃
〃No! consult your inclination a little longer。〃
〃Must I?〃
〃Yes; that shall be your punishment。〃
〃For what? What have I done?〃 asked she with an air of great innocence。
〃You have made me happy; me who adore you;〃 was the evasive reply。
Josephine came in from her walk with a high color and beaming eyes; and screamed; 〃Run; Rose!〃
On this concise; and to us not very clear instruction; Rose slipped up the secret stair。 She saw Camille come in and gravely unpack his little portmanteau; and dispose his things in the drawers with soldier…like neatness; and hum an agreeable march。 She came and told Josephine。
〃Ah!〃 said Josephine with a little sigh of pleasure; and a gentle triumph in her eyes。
She had not only got her desire; but had arrived at it her way; woman's way; round about。
This adroit benevolence led to more than she bargained for。 She and Camille were now together every day: and their hearts; being under restraint in public; melted together all the more in their stolen interviews。
At the third delicious interview the modest Camille begged Josephine to be his wife directly。
Have you noticed those half tame deer that come up to you in a park so lovingly; with great tender eyes; and; being now almost within reach; stop short; and with bodies fixed like statues on pedestals; crane out their graceful necks for sugar; or bread; or a chestnut; or a pocket…handkerchief? Do but offer to put your hand upon them; away they bound that moment twenty yards; and then stand quite still; and look at your hand and you; with great inquiring; suspicious; tender eyes。
So Josephine started at Camille's audacious proposal。 〃Never mention such a thing to me again: oror; I will not walk with you any more:〃 then she thrilled with pleasure at the obnoxious idea; 〃she Camille's wife!〃 and colored all overwith rage; Camille thought。 He promised submissively not to renew the topic: no more he did till next day。 Josephine had spent nearly the whole interval in thinking of it; so she was prepared to put him down by calm reasons。 She proceeded to do so; gently; but firmly。
Lo and behold! what does he do; but meets her with just as many reasons; and just as calm ones: and urges them gently; but firmly。
Heaven had been very kind to them: why should they be unkind to themselves? They had had a great escape: why not accept the happiness; as; being persons of honor; they had accepted the misery? with many other arguments; differing in other things; but agreeing in this; that they were all sober; grave; and full of common…sense。
Finding him not defenceless on the score of reason; she shifted her ground and appealed to his delicacy。 On this he appealed to her love; and then calm reason was jostled off the field; and passion and sentiment battled in her place。
In these contests day by day renewed; Camille had many advantages。
Rose; though she did not like him; had now declared on his side。 She refused to show him the least attention。 This threw him on Josephine: and when Josephine begged her to help reduce Camille to reason; her answer would be;
〃Hypocrite!〃 with a kiss: or else she would say; with a half comic petulance; 〃No! no! I am on his side。 Give him his own way; or he will make us all four miserable。〃
Thus Josephine's ally went over to the enemy。
And then this coy young lady's very power of resistance began to give way。 She had now battled for months against her own heart: first for her mother; then; in a far more terrible conflict for Raynal; for honor and purity; and of late she had been battling; still against her own heart; for delicacy; for etiquette; things very dear to her; but not so great; holy; and sustaining as honor and charity that were her very household gods: and so; just when the motives of resistance were lowered; the length of the resistance began to wear her out。
For nothing is so hard to her sex as a long steady struggle。 In matters physical; this is the thing the muscles of the fair cannot stand; in matters intellectual and moral; the long strain it is that beats them dead。
Do not look for a Bacona; a Newtona; a Handella; a Victoria Huga。
Some American ladies tell us education has stopped the growth of these。
No! mesdames。 These are not in nature。
They can bubble letters in ten minutes that you could no more deliver to order in ten days than a river can play like a fountain。 They can sparkle gems of stories: they can flash little diamonds of poems。 The entire sex has never produced one opera nor one epic that mankind could tolerate: and why? these come by long; high… strung labor。 But; weak as they are in the long run of everything but the affections (and there giants); they are all overpowering while their gallop lasts。 Fragilla shall dance any two of you flat on the floor before four o'clock; and then dance on till the peep of day。
Only you trundle off to your business as usual; and could dance again the next night; and so on through countless ages。
She who danced you into nothing is in bed; a human jelly tipped with headache。
What did Josephine say to Rose one day? 〃I am tired of saying 'No! no! no! no! no!' forever and ever to him I love。〃
But this was not all。 She was not free from self…reproach。 Camille's faith in her had stood firm。 Hers in him had not。 She had wronged him; first by believing him false; then by marrying another。 One day she asked his pardon for this。 He replied that he had forgiven that; but would she be good enough to make him forget it?
〃I wish I could。〃
〃You can。 Marry me: then your relation to that man will seem but a hideous dream。 I shall be able to say; looking at you; my wife; 'I was faithful: I suffered something for her; I came home: she loved me still; the proof is; she was my wife within three months of my return。'〃
When he said that to her in the Pleasaunce; if there had been a priest at hand。 In a word; Josephine longed to show him her love; yet wished not to shock her mother; nor offend her own sense of delicacy; but Camille cared for nothing but his love。 To sacrifice love and happiness; even for a time; to etiquette; seemed to him to be trifling with the substance of great things for the shadow of petty things; and he said so: sometimes sadly; sometimes almost bitterly。
So Josephine was a beleagured fortress; attacked with one will; and defended by troops; one…third of which were hot on the side of the besiegers。
When singleness attacks division; you know the result beforehand。 Why then should I spin words? I will not trace so ill…matched a contest step by step; sentence by sentence: let me rather hasten to relate the one peculiarity that arose out of this trite contest; where; under the names of Camille and Josephine; the two great sexes may be seen acting the whole world…wide distich;
〃It's a man's part to try; And a woman's to deny 'for a while?'。〃
Finding her own resolutions oozing away; Josephine caught at another person。
She said to Camille before Rose;
〃Even if I could bring myself to snatch at happiness in this indelicate wayscarce a month after; oh!〃 And there ended the lady's sentence。 In the absence of a legitimate full stop; she put one hand before her lovely face to hide it; and so no more。 But some two minutes after she delivered the rest in the form and with the tone of a distinct remark; 〃No: my mother would never consent。〃
〃Yes; she would if you could be brought to implore her as earnestly as I implore you。〃
〃Now would she?〃 asked Josephine; turning quickly to her sister。
〃No; never。 Our mother would look with horror on such a proposal。 A daughter of hers to marry within a twelvemonth of her widowhood!〃
〃There; you see; Camille。〃
〃And; besides; she loved Raynal so; she has not forgotten him as we have; almost。〃
〃Ungrateful creature that I am!〃 sighed Josephine!
〃She mourns for him every day。 Often I see her eyes suddenly fill; that is for him。 Josephine's influence with mamma is very great: it is double mine: but if we all went on our knees t