white lies-第43部分

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Rose　bit　her　lip。　　She　could　not　help　seeing　then　how　much　dear　Edouard　was　in　her　way　and　Josephine's。　　Their　best　friends　are　in　the　way　of　all　who　have　secrets。　　Presently　the　doctor　went　to　his　study。　　Then　Edouard　let　fall　a　mock　soliloquy。　　〃I　wonder；〃　said　he；　dropping　out　his　words　one　by　one；　〃whether　any　one　will　ever　love　me　well　enough　to　give　a　drop　of　their　blood　for　me。〃

〃If　you　were　in　sickness　and　sorrow；　who　knows？〃　said　Rose；　coloring　up。

〃I　would　soon　be　in　sickness　and　sorrow　if　I　thought　that。〃

〃Don't　jest　with　such　matters；　monsieur。〃

〃I　am　serious。　　I　wish　I　was　as　ill　as　Madame　Raynal　is；　to　be　loved　as　she　is。〃

〃You　must　resemble　her　in　some　other　things　to　be　loved　as　she　is。

〃You　have　often　made　me　feel　that　of　late；　dear　Rose。〃

This　touched　her。　　But　she　fought　down　the　kindly　feeling。　　〃I　am　glad　of　it；〃　said　she；　out　of　perverseness。　　She　added　after　a　while；　〃Edouard；　you　are　naturally　jealous。〃

〃Not　the　least　in　the　world；　Rose；　I　assure　you。　　I　have　many　faults；　but　jealous　I　am　not。〃

〃Oh；　yes；　you　are；　and　suspicious；　too；　there　is　something　in　your　character　that　alarms　me　for　our　happiness。〃

〃Well；　if　you　come　to　that；　there　are　things　in　YOUR　conduct　I　could　wish　explained。〃

〃There！　I　said　so。　　You　have　not　confidence　in　me。〃

〃Pray　don't　say　that；　dear　Rose。　　I　have　every　confidence　in　you；　only　please　don't　ask　me　to　divest　myself　of　my　senses　and　my　reason。〃

〃I　don't　ask　you　to　do　that　or　anything　else　for　me；　good…by；　for　the　present。〃

〃Where　are　you　going　now？　tic！　tic！　I　never　can　get　a　word　in　peace　with　you。〃

〃I　am　not　going　to　commit　murder。　　I'm　only　going　up…stairs　to　my　sister。〃

〃Poor　Madame　Raynal；　she　makes　it　very　hard　for　me　not　to　dislike　her。〃

〃Dislike　my　Josephine？〃　and　Rose　bristled　visibly。

〃She　is　an　angel；　but　I　should　hate　an　angel　if　it　came　forever　between　you　and　me。〃

〃Excuse　me；　she　was　here　long　before　you。　　It　is　you　that　came　between　her　and　me。〃

〃I　came　because　I　was　told　I　should　be　welcome；〃　said　Edouard　bitterly；　and　equivocating　a　little；　he　added；　〃and　I　dare　say　I　shall　go　when　I　am　told　I　am　one　too　many。〃

〃Bad　heart！　who　says　you　are　one　too　many　in　the　house？　　But　you　are　too　exigent；　monsieur；　you　assume　the　husband；　and　you　tease　me。　　It　is　selfish；　can　you　not　see　I　am　anxious　and　worried？　you　ought　to　be　kind　to　me；　and　soothe　me；　that　is　what　I　look　for　from　you；　and；　instead　of　that；　I　declare　you　are　getting　to　be　quite　a　worry。〃

〃I　should　not　be　if　you　loved　me　as　I　love　you。　　I　give　YOU　no　rival。　　Shall　I　tell　you　the　cause　of　all　this？　you　have　secrets。〃

〃What　secrets？〃

〃Is　it　me　you　ask？　am　I　trusted　with　them？　　Secrets　are　a　bond　that　not　even　love　can　overcome。　　It　is　to　talk　secrets　you　run　away　from　me　to　Madame　Raynal。　　Where　did　you　lodge　at　Frejus；　Mademoiselle　the　Reticent？〃

〃In　a　grotto；　dry　at　low　water；　Monsieur　the　Inquisitive。〃

〃That　is　enough：　since　you　will　not　tell　me；　I　will　find　it　out　before　I　am　a　week　older。〃

This　alarmed　Rose　terribly；　and　drove　her　to　extremities。　　She　decided　to　quarrel。

〃Sir；〃　said　she；　〃I　thank　you　for　playing　the　tyrant　a　little　prematurely；　it　has　put　me　on　my　guard。　　Let　us　part；　you　and　I　are　not　suited　to　each　other；　Edouard　Riviere。〃

He　took　this　more　humbly　than　she　expected。　　〃Part！〃　said　he；　in　consternation；　〃that　is　a　terrible　word　to　pass　between　you　and　me。　Forgive　me！　I　suppose　I　am　jealous。〃

〃You　are；　you　are　actually　jealous　of　my　sister。　　Well；　I　tell　you　plainly　I　love　you；　but　I　love　my　sister　better。　　I　never　could　love　any　man　as　I　do　her；　it　is　ridiculous　to　expect　such　a　thing。〃

〃And　do　you　think　I　could　bear　to　play　second　fiddle　to　her　all　my　life？〃

〃I　don't　ask　you。　　Go　and　play　first　trumpet　to　some　other　lady。〃

〃You　speak　your　wishes　so　plainly　now；　I　have　nothing　to　do　but　to　obey。〃

He　kissed　her　hand　and　went　away　disconsolately。

Rose；　instead　of　going　to　Josephine；　her　determination　to　do　which　had　mainly　caused　the　quarrel；　sat　sadly　down；　and　leaned　her　head　on　her　hand。　　〃I　am　cruel。　　I　am　ungrateful。　　He　has　gone　away　broken…hearted。　　And　what　shall　I　do　without　him？little　fool！　　I　love　him　better　than　he　loves　me。　　He　will　never　forgive　me。　　I　have　wounded　his　vanity；　and　they　are　vainer　than　we　are。　　If　we　meet　at　dinner　I　will　be　so　kind　to　him；　he　will　forget　it　all。　　No！　Edouard　will　not　come　to　dinner。　　He　is　not　a　spaniel　that　you　can　beat；　and　then　whistle　back　again。　　Something　tells　me　I　have　lost　him；　and　if　I　have；　what　shall　I　do？　　I　will　write　him　a　note。　　I　will　ask　him　to　forgive　me。〃

She　sat　down　at　the　table；　and　took　a　sheet　of　notepaper　and　began　to　write　a　few　conciliatory　words。　　She　was　so　occupied　in　making　these　kind　enough；　and　not　too　kind；　that　a　light　step　approached　her　unobserved。　　She　looked　up　and　there　was　Edouard。　　She　whipped　the　paper　off　the　table。

A　look　of　suspicion　and　misery　crossed　Edouard's　face。

Rose　caught　it；　and　said；　〃Well；　am　I　to　be　affronted　any　more？〃

〃No；　Rose。　　I　came　back　to　beg　you　to　forget　what　passed　just　now；〃　said　he。

Rose's　eye　flashed；　his　return　showed　her　her　power。　　She　abused　it　directly。

〃How　can　I　forget　it　if　you　come　reminding　me？〃

〃Dear　Rose；　now　don't　be　so　unkind；　so　cruelI　have　not　come　back　to　tease　you；　sweet　one。　　I　come　to　know　what　I　can　do　to　please　you；　to　make　you　love　me　again？〃　and　he　was　about　to　kneel　graciously　on　one　knee。

〃I'll　tell　you。　　Don't　come　near　me　for　a　month。〃

Edouard　started　up；　white　as　ashes　with　mortification　and　wounded　love。

〃This　is　how　you　treat　me　for　humbling　myself；　when　it　is　you　that　ought　to　ask　forgiveness。〃

〃Why　should　I　ask　what　I　don't　care　about？〃

〃What　DO　you　care　about？except　that　sister　of　yours？　　You　have　no　heart。　　And　on　this　cold…blooded　creature　I　have　wasted　a　love　an　empress　might　have　been　proud　of　inspiring。　　I　pray　Heaven　some　man　may　sport　with　your　affections；　you　heartless　creature；　as　you　have　played　with　mine；　and　make　you　suffer　what　I　suffer　now！〃

And　with　a　burst　of　inarticulate　grief　and　rage　he　flung　out　of　the　room。

Rose　sank　trembling　on　the　sofa　a　little　while：　then　with　a　mighty　effort　rose　and　went　to　comfort　her　sister。

Edouard　came　no　more　to　Beaurepaire。


There　is　an　old　French　proverb；　and　a　wise　one；　〃Rien　n'est　certain　que　l'imprevu；〃　it　means　you　can　make　sure　of　nothing　but　this；　that　matters　will　not　turn　as　you　feel　sure　they　will。　　And；　even　for　this　reason；　you；　who　are　thinking　of　suicide　because　trade　is　declining；　speculation　failing；　bankruptcy　impending；　or　your　life　going　to　be　blighted　forever　by　unrequited　loveDON'T　DO　IT。　Whether　you　are　English；　American；　French；　or　German；　listen　to　a　man　that　knows　what　is　what；　and　DON'T　DO　IT。　　I　tell　you　none　of　those　horrors；　when　they　really　come；　will　affect　you　as　you　fancy　they　will。　　The　joys　we　expect　are　not　a　quarter　so　bright；　nor　the　troubles　half　so　dark　as　we　think　they　will　be。　　Bankruptcy　coming　is　one　thing；　come　is　quite　another：　and　no　heart　or　life　was　ever　really　blighted　at　twenty　years　of　age。　　The　love…sick　girls　that　are　picked　out　of　the　canal　alive；　all；　without　exception；　marry　another　man；　have　brats；　and　get　to　screech　with　laughter　when　they　think　of　sweetheart　No。　1；　generally　a　blockhead；　or　else　a　blackguard；　whom　they　were　fools　enough　to　wet　their　clothes　for；　let　alone　kill　their　souls。　　This　happens　INVARIABLY。　　The　love…sick　girls　that　are　picked　out　of　the　canal　dead　have　fled　from　a　year's　misery　to　eternal　pain；　from　grief　that　time　never　failed　to　cure；　to　anguish　incurable。　　In　this　world　〃Rien　n'est　certain　que　l'imprevu。〃

Edouard　and　Rose　were　tender　lovers；　at　a　distance。　　How　much　happier　and　more　loving　they　thought　they　should　be　beneath　the　same　roof。　　They　came　together：　their　prominent　faults　of　character　rubbed：　the　secret　that　was　in　the　house　did　its　work：　and　altogether；　they　quarrelled。　　L'imprevu。

Dard　had　been　saying　to　Jacintha　for　ever　so　long；　〃When　granny　dies；　I　will　marry　you。〃

Granny　died。　　Dard　took　possession　of　her　little　property。　　Up　came　a　glittering　official；　and　turned　him　out；　he　was　not　her　heir。　Perrin；　the　notary；　was。　　He　had　bought　the　inheritance　of　her　two　sons；　long　since　dead。

Dard　had　not　only　looked　on　the　cottage　and　cow；　as　his；　but　had　spoken　of　them　as　such　for　years。　　The　disappointment　and　the　irony　of　comrades　ate　into　him。

〃I　will　leave　this　cursed　place；〃　said　he。

Josephine　instantly　sent　for　him　to　Beaurepaire。　　He　came；　and　was　factotum　with　the　novelty　of　a　fixed　salary。　　Jacintha　accommodated　him　with　a　new　little　odd　job　or　two。　　She　set　him　to　dance　on　the　oak　floors　with　a　brush　fastened　to　his　right　foot；　and；　after　a　rehearsal　or　two；　she　made　him　wait　at　table。　　Didn't　he　bang　the　things　about：　and　when　he　brought　a　lady　a　dish；　and　she　did　not　instantly　attend；　he　gave　her　elbow　a　poke　to　attract　attention：　then　she　squeaked；　and　he　grinned　at　her　double　absurdity　in　minding　a　touch；　and　not　minding　the　real　business　of　the　table。

But　his　wrongs　rankled　in　him。　　He　vented　antique　phrases　such　as；　〃I　want　a　change；〃　　〃This　village　is　the　last　place　the　Almighty　made；〃　etc。

Then　he　was　attacked　with　a　moral　disease：　affected　the　company　of　soldiers。　　He　spent　his　weekly　salary　carousing　with　the　military；　a　class　of　men　so　brilliant　that　they　are　not　expected　to　pay　for　their　share　of　the　drink；　they　contribute　the　anecdotes　and　the　familiar　appeals　to　Heaven：　and　is　not　that　enough？

Present　at　many　recitals；　the　heroes　of　which　lost　nothing　by　being　their　own　historians；　Dard　imbibed　a　taste　for　military　adventure。　His　very　talk；　which　used　to　be　so　homely；　began　now　to　be　tinselled　with　big　swelling　words　of　vanity　imported　from　the　army。　　I　need　hardly　say　these　bombastical　phrases　did　not　elevate　his　general　dialect：　they　lay　fearfully　distinct　upon　the　surface；　〃like　lumps　of　marl　upon　a　barren　soil；　encumbering　the　ground　they　could　not　fertilize。〃

Jacintha　took　leave　to　remind　him　of　an　incident　connected　with　warfarewounds。

〃Do　you　remember　how　you　were　down　upon　your　luck　when　you　did　but　cut　your　foot？　　Why；　that　is　nothing　in　the　army。　　They　never　go　out　to　fight　but　some　co