freckles-第40部分

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Then　the　Angel　grew　splendid。　　A　rosy　flush　swept　the　pallor　of　fear

from　her　face。　　Her　big　eyes　widened　and　dilated　with　intense　lights。　

She　seemed　to　leap　to　the　height　and　the　dignity　of　superb　womanhood

before　their　wondering　gaze。



〃I　never　have　had　to　dream　of　love；〃　she　said　proudly。　　〃I　never

have　known　anything　else；　in　all　my　life；　but　to　love　everyone　and

to　have　everyone　love　me。　　And　there　never　has　been　anyone　so　dear

as　Freckles。　　If　you　will　remember；　we　have　been　through　a　good　deal

together。　　I　do　love　Freckles；　just　as　I　say　I　do。　　I　don't　know

anything　about　the　love　of　sweethearts；　but　I　love　him　with　all　the

love　in　my　heart；　and　I　think　that　will　satisfy　him。〃



〃Surely　it　should！〃　muttered　the　man　of　knives　and　lancets。



McLean　reached　to　take　hold　of　the　Angel；　but　she　saw　the　movement

and　swiftly　stepped　back。



〃As　for　my　father；〃　she　continued；　〃he　at　once　told　me　what　he

learned　from　you　about　Freckles。　　I've　known　all　you　know　for

several　weeks。　　That　knowledge　didn't　change　your　love　for　him

a　particle。　　I　think　the　Bird　Woman　loved　him　more。　　Why　should

you　two　have　all　the　fine　perceptions　there　are？　　Can't　I　see　how

brave；　trustworthy；　and　splendid　he　is？　　Can't　I　see　how　his　soul

vibrates　with　his　music；　his　love　of　beautiful　things　and　the　pangs

of　loneliness　and　heart　hunger？　　Must　you　two　love　him　with　all　the

love　there　is；　and　I　give　him　none？　　My　father　is　never　unreasonable。　

He　won't　expect　me　not　to　love　Freckles；　or　not　to　tell　him　so；

if　the　telling　will　save　him。〃



She　darted　past　McLean　into　Freckles'　room；　closed　the　door；　and

turned　the　key。







　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　CHAPTER　XVIII



　　　Wherein　Freckles　refuses　Love　Without　Knowledge　of　Honorable　Birth；

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　and　the　Angel　Goes　in　Quest　of　it



Freckles　lay　on　a　flat　pillow；　his　body　immovable　in　a　plaster

cast；　his　maimed　arm；　as　always；　hidden。　　His　greedy　gaze　fastened

at　once　on　the　Angel's　face。　　She　crossed　to　him　with　light　step　and

bent　over　him　with　infinite　tenderness。　　Her　heart　ached　at　the

change　in　his　appearance。　　He　seemed　so　weak；　heart　hungry；　so

utterly　hopeless；　so　alone。　　She　could　see　that　the　night　had　been

one　long　terror。



For　the　first　time　she　tried　putting　herself　in　Freckles'　place。

What　would　it　mean　to　have　no　parents；　no　home；　no　name？　　No　name！

That　was　the　worst　of　all。　　That　was　to　be　lostindeedutterly　and

hopelessly　lost。　　The　Angel　lifted　her　hands　to　her　dazed　head　and

reeled；　as　she　tried　to　face　that　proposition。　　She　dropped　on　her

knees　beside　the　bed；　slipped　her　arm　under　the　pillow；　and　leaning

over　Freckles；　set　her　lips　on　his　forehead。　　He　smiled　faintly；　but

his　wistful　face　appeared　worse　for　it。　　It　hurt　the　Angel　to　the　heart。



〃Dear　Freckles；〃　she　said；　〃there　is　a　story　in　your　eyes　this

morning；　tell　me？〃



Freckles　drew　a　long；　wavering　breath。



〃Angel；〃　he　begged；　〃be　generous！　　Be　thinking　of　me　a　little。　

I'm　so　homesick　and　worn　out；　dear　Angel；　be　giving　me　back　me　promise。

Let　me　go？〃



〃Why　Freckles！〃　faltered　the　Angel。　　〃You　don't　know　what　you

are　asking。　　‘Let　you　go！'　I　cannot！　　I　love　you　better　than

anyone；　Freckles。　　I　think　you　are　the　very　finest　person　I　ever　knew。　

I　have　our　lives　all　planned。　　I　want　you　to　be　educated　and　learn

all　there　is　to　know　about　singing；　just　as　soon　as　you　are　well　enough。　

By　the　time　you　have　completed　your　education　I　will　have

finished　college；　and　then　I　want；〃　she　choked　a　second；　〃I　want

you　to　be　my　real　knight；　Freckles；　and　come　to　me　and　tell　me　that

youlike　mea　little。　　I　have　been　counting　on　you　for　my

sweetheart　from　the　very　first；　Freckles。　　I　can't　give　you　up；

unless　you　don't　like　me。　　But　you　do　like　mejust　a　littledon't

you；　Freckles？〃



Freckles　lay　whiter　than　the　coverlet；　his　staring　eyes　on　the

ceiling　and　his　breath　wheezing　between　dry　lips。　　The　Angel　awaited

his　answer　a　second；　and　when　none　came；　she　dropped　her　crimsoning

face　beside　him　on　the　pillow　and　whispered　in　his　ear：



〃Freckles；　II'm　trying　to　make　love　to　you。　　Oh；　can't　you　help　me

only　a　little　bit？　　It's　awful　hard　all　alone！　　I　don't　know　how；

when　I　really　mean　it；　but　Freckles；　I　love　you。　　I　must　have　you；

and　now　I　guessI　guess　maybe　I'd　better　kiss　you　next。〃



She　lifted　her　shamed　face　and　bravely　laid　her　feverish；　quivering

lips　on　his。　　Her　breath；　like　clover…bloom；　was　in　his　nostrils；　and

her　hair　touched　his　face。　　Then　she　looked　into　his　eyes　with　reproach。



〃Freckles；〃　she　panted；　〃Freckles！　　I　didn't　think　it　was　in　you　to

be　mean！〃



〃Mean；　Angel！　　Mean　to　you？〃　gasped　Freckles。



〃Yes；〃　said　the　Angel。　　〃Downright　mean。　　When　I　kiss　you；　if　you　had

any　mercy　at　all　you'd　kiss　back；　just　a　little　bit。〃



Freckles'　sinewy　fist　knotted　into　the　coverlet。　　His　chin　pointed

ceilingward　while　his　head　rocked　on　the　pillow。



〃Oh；　Jesus！〃　burst　from　him　in　agony。　　〃You　ain't　the　only　one　that

was　crucified！〃



The　Angel　caught　Freckles'　hand　and　carried　it　to　her　breast。



〃Freckles！〃　she　wailed　in　terror；　〃Freckles！　　It　is　a　mistake？　　Is　it

that　you　don't　want　me？〃



Freckles'　head　rolled　on　in　wordless　suffering。



〃Wait　a　bit；　Angel？〃　he　panted　at　last。　　〃Be　giving　me　a　little　time！〃



The　Angel　arose　with　controlled　features。　　She　bathed　his　face；

straightened　his　hair；　and　held　water　to　his　lips。　　It　seemed　a　long

time　before　he　reached　toward　her。　　Instantly　she　knelt　again；

carried　his　hand　to　her　breast；　and　leaned　her　cheek　upon　it。



〃Tell　me；　Freckles；〃　she　whispered　softly。



〃If　I　can；〃　said　Freckles　in　agony。　　〃It's　just　this。　　Angels　are

from　above。　　Outcasts　are　from　below。　　You've　a　sound　body　and　you're

beautifulest　of　all。　　You　have　everything　that　loving；　careful

raising　and　money　can　give　you。　　I　have　so　much　less　than　nothing

that　I　don't　suppose　I　had　any　right　to　be　born。　　It's　a　sure

thingnobody　wanted　me　afterward；　so　of　course；　they　didn't

before。　　Some　of　them　should　have　been　telling　you　long　ago。〃



〃If　that's　all　you　have　to　say；　Freckles；　I've　known　that　quite　a

while；〃　said　the　Angel　stoutly。　　〃Mr。　McLean　told　my　father；　and　he

told　me。　　That　only　makes　me　love　you　more；　to　pay　for　all　you've　missed。〃



〃Then　I'm　wondering　at　you；〃　said　Freckles　in　a　voice　of　awe。

〃Can't　you　see　that　if　you　were　willing　and　your　father　would　come

and　offer　you　to　me；　I　couldn't　be　touching　the　soles　of　your　feet；

in　loveme；　whose　people　brawled　over　me；　cut　off　me　hand；　and

throwed　me　away　to　freeze　and　to　die！　　Me；　who　has　no　name　just　as

much　because　I've　no　RIGHT　to　any；　as　because　I　don't　know　it。　

When　I　was　little；　I　planned　to　find　me　father　and　mother　when　I

grew　up。　　Now　I　know　me　mother　deserted　me；　and　me　father　was　maybe　a

thief　and　surely　a　liar。　　The　pity　for　me　suffering　and　the　watching

over　me　have　gone　to　your　head；　dear　Angel；　and　it's　me　must　be

thinking　for　you。　　If　you　could　be　forgetting　me　lost　hand；　where　I

was　raised；　and　that　I　had　no　name　to　give　you；　and　if　you　would　be

taking　me　as　I　am；　some　day　people　such　as　mine　must　be；　might　come

upon　you。　　I　used　to　pray　ivery　night　and　morning　and　many　times　the

day　to　see　me　mother。　　Now　I　only　pray　to　die　quickly　and　never　risk

the　sight　of　her。　　'Tain't　no　ways　possible；　Angel！　　It's　a　wildness

of　your　dear　head。　　Oh；　do　for　mercy　sake；　kiss　me　once　more　and　be

letting　me　go！〃



〃Not　for　a　minute！〃　cried　the　Angel。　　〃Not　for　a　minute；　if　those

are　all　the　reasons　you　have。　　It's　you　who　are　wild　in　your　head；

but　I　can　understand　just　how　it　happened。　　Being　shut　in　that　Home

most　of　your　life；　and　seeing　children　every　day　whose　parents　did

neglect　and　desert　them；　makes　you　sure　yours　did　the　same；　and　yet

there　are　so　many　other　things　that　could　have　happened　so　much

more　easily　than　that。　　There　are　thousands　of　young　couples　who

come　to　this　country　and　start　a　family　with　none　of　their

relatives　here。　　Chicago　is　a　big；　wicked　city；　and　grown　people

could　disappear　in　many　ways；　and　who　would　there　ever　be　to　find

to　whom　their　little　children　belonged？　　The　minute　my　father　told

me　how　you　felt；　I　began　to　study　this　thing　over；　and　I've　made　up

my　mind　you　are　dead　wrong。　　I　meant　to　ask　my　father　or　the　Bird

Woman　to　talk　to　you　before　you　went　away　to　school；　but　as　matters

are　right　now　I　guess　I'll　just　do　it　myself。　　It's　all　so　plain

to　me。　　Oh；　if　I　could　only　make　you　see！〃



She　buried　her　face　in　the　pillow　and　presently　lifted　it；　transfigured。



〃Now　I　have　it！〃　she　cried。　　〃Oh；　dear　heart！　　I　can　make　it

so　plain！　　Freckles；　can　you　imagine　you　see　the　old　Limberlost　trail？

Well　when　we　followed　it；　you　know　there　were　places　where　ugly；

prickly　thistles　overgrew　the　path；　and　you　went　ahead　with　your

club　and　bent　them　back　to　keep　them　from　stinging　through　my　clothing。　

Other　places　there　were　big　shining　pools　where　lovely；　snow…white

lilies　grew；　and　you　waded　in　and　gathered　them　for　me。　　Oh　dear

heart；　don't　you　see？　　It's　this！　　Everywhere　the　wind　carried

that　thistledown；　other　thistles　sprang　up　and　grew　prickles；

and　wherever　those　lily　seeds　sank　to　the　mire；　the　pure　white

of　other　lilies　bloomed。　　But；　Freckles；　there　was　never　a

place　anywhere　in　the　Limberlost；　or　in　the　whole　world；　where　the

thistledown　floated　and　sprang　up　and　blossomed　into　white　lilies！　

Thistles　grow　from　thistles；　and　lilies　from　other　lilies。　

Dear　Freckles；　think　hard！　　You　must　see　it！　　You　are　a　lily；

straight　through。　　You　never；　never　could　have　drifted　from　the

thistle…patch。



〃Where　did　you　find　the　courage　to　go　into　the　Limberlost　and　face

its　terrors？　　You　inherited　it　from　the　blood　of　a　brave　father；

dear　heart。　　Where　did　you　get　the　pluck　to　hold　for　over　a　year　a

job　that　few　men　would　have　taken　at　all？　　You　got　it　from　a　plucky

mot