hemingway, ernest - for whom the bell tolls-第44部分

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〃Then　Pablo；〃　Fernando　said　judicially。　〃Thou　art　with　us　now　and　in　favor　of　this　of　the　bridge？〃
〃Yes；　man；〃　Pablo　said。　He　looked　Fernando　squarely　in　the　eye　and　nodded。
〃In　truth？〃　Primitivo　asked。
〃_De　veras_；〃　Pablo　told　him。
〃And　you　think　it　can　be　successful？〃　Fernando　asked。　〃You　now　have　confidence？〃
〃Why　not？〃　Pablo　said。　〃Haven't　you　confidence？〃
〃Yes；〃　Fernando　said。　〃But　I　always　have　confidence。〃
〃I'm　going　to　get　out　of　here；〃　Agust韓　said。
〃It　is　cold　outside；〃　Pablo　told　him　in　a　friendly　tone。
〃Maybe；〃　Agust韓　said。　〃But　I　can't　stay　any　longer　in　this　_manicomio_。〃
〃Do　not　call　this　cave　an　insane　asylum；〃　Fernando　said。
〃A　_manicomio_　for　criminal　lunatics；〃　Agust韓　said。　〃And　I'm　getting　out　before　I'm　crazy；　too。〃




18


It　is　like　a　merry…go…round；　Robert　Jordan　thought。　Not　a　merry…goround　that　travels　fast；　and　with　a　calliope　for　music；　and　the　children　ride　on　cows　with　gilded　horns；　and　there　are　rings　to　catch　with　sticks；　and　there　is　the　blue；　gas…flare…lit　early　dark　of　the　Avenue　du　Maine；　with　fried　fish　sold　from　the　next　stall；　and　a　wheel　of　fortune　turning　with　the　leather　flaps　slapping　against　the　posts　of　the　numbered　compartments；　and　the　packages　of　lump　sugar　piled　in　pyramids　for　prizes。　No；　it　is　not　that　kind　of　a　merrygo…round；　although　the　people　are　waiting；　like　the　men　in　caps　and　the　women　in　knitted　sweaters；　their　heads　bare　in　the　gaslight　and　their　hair　shining；　who　stand　in　front　of　the　wheel　of　fortune　as　it　spins。　Yes；　those　are　the　people。　But　this　is　another　wheel。　This　is　like　a　wheel　that　goes　up　and　around。
It　has　been　around　twice　now。　It　is　a　vast　wheel；　set　at　an　angle；　and　each　time　it　goes　around　and　then　is　back　to　where　it　starts。　One　side　is　higher　than　the　other　and　the　sweep　it　makes　lifts　you　back　and　down　to　where　you　started。　There　are　no　prizes　either；　he　thought；　and　no　one　would　choose　to　ride　this　wheel。　You　ride　it　each　time　and　make　the　turn　with　no　intention　ever　to　have　mounted。　There　is　only　one　turn；　one　large；　elliptical；　rising　and　falling　turn　and　you　are　back　where　you　have　started。　We　are　back　again　now；　he　thought；　and　nothing　is　settled。
It　was　warm　in　the　cave　and　the　wind　had　dropped　outside。　Now　he　was　sitting　at　the　table　with　his　notebook　in　front　of　him　figuring　all　the　technical　part　of　the　bridge…blowing。　He　drew　three　sketches；　figured　his　formulas；　marked　the　method　of　blowing　with　two　drawings　as　clearly　as　a　kindergarten　project　so　that　Anselmo　could　complete　it　in　case　anything　should　happen　to　himself　during　the　process　of　the　demolition。　He　finished　these　sketches　and　studied　them。
Maria　sat　beside　him　and　looked　over　his　shoulder　while　he　worked。　He　was　conscious　of　Pablo　across　the　table　and　of　the　others　talking　and　playing　cards　and　he　smelled　the　odors　of　the　cave　which　had　changed　now　from　those　of　the　meal　and　the　cooking　to　the　fire　smoke　and　man　smell；　the　tobacco；　red…wine　and　brassy；　stale　body　smell；　and　when　Maria；　watching　him　finishing　a　drawing；　put　her　hand　on　the　table　he　picked　it　up　with　his　left　hand　and　lifted　it　to　his　face　and　smelled　the　coarse　soap　and　water　freshness　from　her　washing　of　the　dishes。　He　laid　her　hand　down　without　looking　at　her　and　went　on　working　and　he　could　not　see　her　blush。　She　let　her　hand　lie　there；　close　to　his；　but　he　did　not　lift　it　again。
Now　he　had　finished　the　demolition　project　and　he　took　a　new　page　of　the　notebook　and　commenced　to　write　out　the　operation　orders。　He　was　thinking　clearly　and　well　on　these　and　what　he　wrote　pleased　him。　He　wrote　two　pages　in　the　notebook　and　read　them　over　carefully。
I　think　that　is　all；　he　said　to　himself。　It　is　perfectly　clear　and　I　do　not　think　there　are　any　holes　in　it。　The　two　posts　will　be　destroyed　and　the　bridge　will　be　blown　according　to　Golz's　orders　and　that　is　all　of　my　responsibility。　All　of　this　business　of　Pablo　is　something　with　which　I　should　never　have　been　saddled　and　it　will　be　solved　one　way　or　another。　There　will　be　Pablo　or　there　will　be　no　Pablo。　I　care　nothing　about　it　either　way。　But　I　am　not　going　to　get　on　that　wheel　again。　Twice　I　have　been　on　that　wheel　and　twice　it　has　gone　around　and　come　back　to　where　it　started　and　I　am　taking　no　more　rides　on　it。
He　shut　the　notebook　and　looked　up　at　Maria。　〃_Hola；　guapa_；〃　he　said　to　her。　〃Did　you　make　anything　out　of　all　that？〃
〃No；　Roberto；〃　the　girl　said　and　put　her　hand　on　his　hand　that　still　held　the　pencil。　〃Have　you　finished？〃
〃Yes。　Now　it　is　all　written　out　and　ordered。〃
〃What　have　you　been　doing；　_Ingl閟？_〃　Pablo　asked　from　across　the　table。　His　eyes　were　bleary　again。
Robert　Jordan　looked　at　him　closely。　Stay　off　that　wheel；　he　said　to　himself。　Don't　step　on　that　wheel。　I　think　it　is　going　to　start　to　swing　again。
〃Working　on　the　problem　of　the　bridge；〃　he　said　civilly。
〃How　is　it？〃　asked　Pablo。
〃Very　good；〃　Robert　Jordan　said。　〃All　very　good。〃
〃I　have　been　working　on　the　problem　of　the　retreat；〃　Pablo　said　and　Robert　Jordan　looked　at　his　drunken　pig　eyes　and　at　the　wine　bowl。　The　wine　bowl　was　nearly　empty。
Keep　off　the　wheel；　he　told　himself。　He　is　drinking　again。　Sure。　But　don't　you　get　on　that　wheel　now。　Wasn't　Grant　supposed　to　be　drunk　a　good　part　of　the　time　during　the　Civil　War？　Certainly　he　was。　I'll　bet　Grant　would　be　furious　at　the　comparison　if　he　could　see　Pablo。　Grant　was　a　cigar　smoker；　too。　Well；　he　would　have　to　see　about　getting　Pablo　a　cigar。　That　was　what　that　face　really　needed　to　complete　it；　a　half　chewed　cigar。　Where　could　he　get　Pablo　a　cigar？
〃How　does　it　go？〃　Robert　Jordan　asked　politely。
〃Very　well；〃　Pablo　said　and　nodded　his　head　heavily　and　judiciously。　〃_Muy　bien_。〃
〃You've　thought　up　something？〃　Agust韓　asked　from　where　they　were　playing　cards。
〃Yes；〃　Pablo　said。　〃Various　things。〃
〃Where　did　you　find　them？　In　that　bowl？〃　Agust韓　demanded。
〃Perhaps；〃　Pablo　said。　〃Who　knows？　Maria；　fill　the　bowl；　will　you；　please？〃
〃In　the　wineskin　itself　there　should　be　some　fine　ideas；〃　Agust韓　turned　back　to　the　card　game。　〃Why　don't　you　crawl　in　and　look　for　them　inside　the　skin？〃
〃Nay；〃　said　Pablo　equably。　〃I　search　for　them　in　the　bowl。〃
He　is　not　getting　on　the　wheel　either；　Robert　Jordan　thought。　It　must　be　revolving　by　itself。　I　suppose　you　cannot　ride　that　wheel　too　long。　That　is　probably　quite　a　deadly　wheel。　I'm　glad　we　are　off　of　it。　It　was　making　me　dizzy　there　a　couple　of　times。　But　it　is　the　thing　that　drunkards　and　those　who　are　truly　mean　or　cruel　ride　until　they　die。　It　goes　around　and　up　and　the　swing　is　never　quite　the　same　and　then　it　comes　around　down。　Let　it　swing；　he　thought。　They　will　not　get　me　onto　it　again。　No　sir；　General　Grant；　I　am　off　that　wheel。
Pilar　was　sitting　by　the　fire；　her　chair　turned　so　that　she　could　see　over　the　shoulders　of　the　two　card　players　who　had　their　backs　to　her。　She　was　watching　the　game。
Here　it　is　the　shift　from　deadliness　to　normal　family　life　that　is　the　strangest；　Robert　Jordan　thought。　It　is　when　the　damned　wheel　comes　down　that　it　gets　you。　But　I　am　off　that　wheel；　he　thought。　And　nobody　is　going　to　get　me　onto　it　again。
Two　days　ago　I　never　knew　that　Pilar；　Pablo　nor　the　rest　existed；　he　thought。　There　was　no　such　thing　as　Maria　in　the　world。　It　was　certainly　a　much　simpler　world。　I　had　instructions　from　Golz　that　were　perfectly　clear　and　seemed　perfectly　possible　to　carry　out　although　they　presented　certain　difficulties　and　involved　certain　consequences。　After　we　blew　the　bridge　I　expected　either　to　get　back　to　the　lines　or　not　get　back　and　if　we　got　back　I　was　going　to　ask　for　some　time　in　Madrid。　No　one　has　any　leave　in　this　war　but　I　am　sure　I　could　get　two　or　three　days　in　Madrid。
In　Madrid　I　wanted　to　buy　some　books；　to　go　to　the　Florida　Hotel　and　get　a　room　and　to　have　a　hot　bath；　he　thought。　I　was　going　to　send　Luis　the　porter　out　for　a　bottle　of　absinthe　if　he　could　locate　one　at　the　MantequerIas　Leonesas　or　at　any　of　the　places　off　the　Gran　Via　and　I　was　going　to　lie　in　bed　and　read　after　the　bath　and　drink　a　couple　of　absinthes　and　then　I　was　going　to　call　up　Gaylord's　and　see　if　I　could　come　up　there　and　eat。
He　did　not　want　to　eat　at　the　Gran　Via　because　the　food　was　no　good　really　and　you　had　to　get　there　on　time　or　whatever　there　was　of　it　would　be　gone。　Also　there　were　too　many　newspaper　men　there　he　knew　and　he　did　not　want　to　have　to　keep　his　mouth　shut。　He　wanted　to　drink　the　absinthes　and　to　feel　like　talking　and　then　go　up　to　Gaylord's　and　eat　with　Karkov；　where　they　had　good　food　and　real　beer；　and　find　out　what　was　going　on　in　the　war。
He　had　not　liked　Gaylord's；　the　hotel　in　Madrid　the　Russians　had　taken　over　when　he　first　went　there　because　it　seemed　too　luxurious　and　the　food　was　too　good　for　a　besieged　city　and　the　talk　too　cynical　for　a　war。　But　I　corrupted　very　easily；　he　thought。　Why　should　you　not　have　as　good　food　as　could　be　organized　when　you　came　back　from　something　like　this？　And　the　talk　that　he　had　thought　of　as　cynicism　when　he　had　first　heard　it　had　turned　out　to　be　much　too　true。　This　will　be　something　to　tell　at　Gaylord's；　he　thought；　when　this　is　over。　Yes；　when　this　is　over。
Could　you　take　Maria　to　Gaylord's？　No。　You　couldn't。　But　you　could　leave　her　in　the　hotel　and　she　could　take　a　hot　bath　and　be　there　when　you　came　back　from　Gaylord's。　Yes；　you　could　do　that　and　after　you　had　told　Karkov　about　her；　you　could　bring　her　later　because　they　would　be　curious　about　her　and　want　to　see　her。
Maybe　you　wouldn't　go　to　Gaylord's　at　all。　You　could　eat　early　at　the　Gran　Via　and　hurry　back　to　the　Florida。　But　you　knew　you　would　go　to　Gaylord's　because　you　wanted　to　see　all　that　again；　you　wanted　to　eat　that　food　again　and　you　wanted　to　see　all　the　comfort　of　it　and　the　luxury　of　it　after　this。　Then　you　would　come　back　to　the　Florida　and　there　Maria　would　be。　Sure；　she　would　be　there　after　this　was　over。　After　this　was　over。　Yes；　after　this　was　over。　If　he　did　this　well　he　would　rate　a　meal　at　Gaylord's。
Gaylord's　was　the　place　where　you　met　famous　peasant　and　worker　Spanish　commanders　who　had　sprung　to　arms　from　the　people　at　the　start　of　the　war　without　any　previous　military　training　and　found　that　many　of　them　spoke　Russian。　That　had　been　the　first　big　disi