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crabbed in their aspect; that it takes a considerable amount of

courage to attack them。



I will ask Delilah to bring down from my library a very thick; stout

volume; bound in parchment; and standing on the lower shelf; next the

fireplace。  The pretty handmaid knows my books almost as if she were

my librarian; and I don't doubt she would have found it if I had

given only the name on the back。



Delilah returned presently; with the heavy quarto in her arms。  It

was a pleasing sight;the old book in the embrace of the fresh young

damsel。  I felt; on looking at them; as I did when I followed the

slip of a girl who conducted us in the Temple; that ancient building

in the heart of London。  The long…enduring monuments of the dead do

so mock the fleeting presence of the living!



Is n't this book enough to scare any of you?  I said; as Delilah

dumped it down upon the table。  The teacups jumped from their saucers

as it thumped on the board。  Danielis Georgii Morhofii Polyhistor;

Literarius; Philosophicus et Poeticus。  Lubecae MDCCXXXIII。  Perhaps

I should not have ventured to ask you to look at this old volume; if

it had not been for the fact that Dr。 Johnson mentions Morohof as the

author to whom he was specially indebted。 more; I think; than to

any other。  It is a grand old encyclopaedic summary of all the author

knew about pretty nearly everything; full of curious interest; but so

strangely mediaeval; so utterly antiquated in most departments of

knowledge; that it is hard to believe the volume came from the press

at a time when persons whom I well remember were living。  Is it

possible that the books which have been for me what Morhof was for

Dr。 Johnson can look like that to the student of the year 1990?



Morhof was a believer in magic and the transmutation of metals。

There was always something fascinating to me in the old books of

alchemy。  I have felt that the poetry of science lost its wings when

the last powder of projection had been cast into the crucible; and

the fire of the last transmutation furnace went out。  Perhaps I am

wrong in implying that alchemy is an extinct folly。  It existed in

New England's early days; as we learn from the Winthrop papers; and I

see no reason why gold…making should not have its votaries as well as

other popular delusions。



Among the essays of Morhof is one on the 〃Paradoxes of the Senses。〃

That title brought to mind the recollection of another work I have

been meaning to say something about; at some time when you were in

the listening mood。  The book I refer to is 〃A Budget of Paradoxes;〃

by Augustus De Morgan。  De Morgan is well remembered as a very

distinguished mathematician; whose works have kept his name in high

honor to the present time。  The book I am speaking of was published

by his widow; and is largely made up of letters received by him and

his comments upon them。  Few persons ever read it through。  Few

intelligent readers ever took it up and laid it down without taking a

long draught of its singular and interesting contents。  The letters

are mostly from that class of persons whom we call 〃cranks;〃 in our

familiar language。



At this point Number Seven interrupted me by calling out; 〃Give us

some of those cranks' letters。  A crank is a man who does his own

thinking。  I had a relation who was called a crank。  I believe I have

been spoken of as one myself。  That is what you have to expect if you

invent anything that puts an old machine out of fashion; or solve a

problem that has puzzled all the world up to your time。  There never

was a religion founded but its Messiah was called a crank。  There

never was an idea started that woke up men out of their stupid

indifference but its originator was spoken of as a crank。  Do you

want to know why that name is given to the men who do most for the

world's progress?  I will tell you。  It is because cranks make all

the wheels in all the machinery of the world go round。  What would a

steam…engine be without a crank?  I suppose the first fool that

looked on the first crank that was ever made asked what that crooked;

queer…looking thing was good for。  When the wheels got moving he

found out。  Tell us something about that book which has so much to

say concerning cranks。〃



Hereupon I requested Delilah to carry back Morhof; and replace him in

the wide gap he had left in the bookshelf。  She was then to find and

bring down the volume I had been speaking of。



Delilah took the wisdom of the seventeenth century in her arms; and

departed on her errand。  The book she brought down was given me some

years ago by a gentleman who had sagaciously foreseen that it was

just one of those works which I might hesitate about buying; but

should be well pleased to own。  He guessed well; the book has been a

great source of instruction and entertainment to me。  I wonder that

so much time and cost should have been expended upon a work which

might have borne a title like the Encomium Moriae of Erasmus; and yet

it is such a wonderful museum of the productions of the squinting

brains belonging to the class of persons commonly known as cranks

that we could hardly spare one of its five hundred octavo pages。



Those of us who are in the habit of receiving letters from all sorts

of would…be…literary peopleletters of inquiry; many of them with

reference to matters we are supposed to understandcan readily see

how it was that Mr。 De Morgan; never too busy to be good…natured with

the people who pesteredor amused…him with their queer fancies;

received such a number of letters from persons who thought they had

made great discoveries; from those who felt that they and their

inventions and contrivances had been overlooked; and who sought in

his large charity of disposition and great receptiveness a balm for

their wounded feelings and a ray of hope for their darkened

prospects。



The book before us is made up from papers published in 〃The

Athenaeum;〃 with additions by the author。  Soon after opening it we

come to names with which we are familiar; the first of these; that of

Cornelius Agrippa; being connected with the occult and mystic

doctrines dealt with by many of De Morgan's correspondents。  But the

name most likely to arrest us is that of Giordano Bruno; the same

philosopher; heretic; and martyr whose statue has recently been

erected in Rome; to the great horror of the Pope and his prelates in

the Old World and in the New。  De Morgan's pithy account of him will

interest the company : 〃Giordano Bruno was all paradox。  He was; as

has been said; a vorticist before Descartes; an optimist before

Leibnitz; a Copernican before Galileo。  It would be easy to collect a

hundred strange opinions of his。  He was born about 1550; and was

roasted alive at Rome; February 17; 1600; for the maintenance and

defence of the Holy Church; and the rights and liberties of the

same。〃



Number Seven could not contain himself when the reading had reached

this point。  He rose from his chair; and tinkled his spoon against

the side of his teacup。  It may have been a fancy; but I thought it

returned a sound which Mr。 Richard Briggs would have recognized as

implying an organic defect。  But Number Seven did not seem to notice

it; or; if be did; to mind it。



〃Why did n't we all have a chance to help erect that statue?〃 he

cried。  〃A murdered heretic at the beginning of the seventeenth

century; a hero of knowledge in the nineteenth;I drink to the

memory of the roasted crank; Giordano Bruno!〃



Number Seven lifted his teacup to his lips; and most of us followed

his example。



After this outburst of emotion and eloquence had subsided; and the

teaspoons lay quietly in their saucers; I went on with my extract

from the book I had in hand。



I think; I said; that the passage which follows will be new and

instructive to most of the company。  De Morgan's interpretation of

the cabalistic sentence; made up as you will find it; is about as

ingenious a piece of fanciful exposition as you will be likely to

meet with anywhere in any book; new or old。  I am the more willing to

mention it as it suggests a puzzle which some of the company may like

to work upon。  Observe the character and position of the two

distinguished philosophers who did not think their time thrown away

in laboring at this seemingly puerile task。



〃There is a kind of Cabbala Alphabetica which the investigators of

the numerals in words would do well to take up; it is the formation

of sentences which contain all the letters of the alphabet; and each

only once。  No one has done it with v and j treated as consonants;

but you and I can do it。  Dr。 Whewell and I amused ourselves some

years ago with attempts。  He could not make sense; though he joined

words he gave me Phiz; styx; wrong; buck; flame; quiz。



〃I gave him the following; which he agreed was 'admirable sense;'

I certainly think the words would never have come together except in

this way: I quartz pyx who fling muck beds。  I long thought that no

human being could say this under any circumstances。  At last I

happened to be reading a religious writer;as he thought himself;

who threw aspersions on his opponents thick and threefold。  Heyday

came into my head; this fellow flings muck beds; he must be a quartz

pyx。  And then I remembered that a pyx is a sacred vessel; and quartz

is a hard stone; as hard as the heart of a religious foe…curser。  So

that the line is the motto of the ferocious sectarian who turns his

religious vessels into mud…holders; for the benefit of those who will

not see what he sees。〃



There are several other sentences given; in which all the letters

(except v and j as consonants) are employed; of which the following

is the best: Get nymph; quiz sad brow; fix luck;which in more sober

English would be; Marry; be cheerful; watch your business。  There is

more edification; mare religion; in this than in all the 666

interpret

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