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were　the　most　obscureshe　might　well　have　marvelled　that　it　didn't

seem　to　her　more　horrid。　　It　was　either　the　frenzy　of　her

imagination　or　the　disorder　of　his　baffled　passion　that　gave　her

once　or　twice　the　vision　of　his　putting　down　redundant　money

sovereigns　not　concerned　with　the　little　payments　he　was

perpetually　makingso　that　she　might　give　him　some　sign　of　helping

him　to　slip　them　over　to　her。　　What　was　most　extraordinary　in　this

impression　was　the　amount　of　excuse　that；　with　some　incoherence；

she　found　for　him。　　He　wanted　to　pay　her　because　there　was　nothing

to　pay　her　for。　　He　wanted　to　offer　her　things　he　knew　she　wouldn't

take。　　He　wanted　to　show　her　how　much　he　respected　her　by　giving

her　the　supreme　chance　to　show　HIM　she　was　respectable。　　Over　the

dryest　transactions；　at　any　rate；　their　eyes　had　out　these

questions。　　On　the　third　day　he　put　in　a　telegram　that　had

evidently　something　of　the　same　point　as　the　stray　sovereignsa

message　that　was　in　the　first　place　concocted　and　that　on　a　second

thought　he　took　back　from　her　before　she　had　stamped　it。　　He　had

given　her　time　to　read　it　and　had　only　then　bethought　himself　that

he　had　better　not　send　it。　　If　it　was　not　to　Lady　Bradeen　at

Twindlewhere　she　knew　her　ladyship　then　to　bethis　was　because

an　address　to　Doctor　Buzzard　at　Brickwood　was　just　as　good；　with

the　added　merit　of　its　not　giving　away　quite　so　much　a　person　whom

he　had　still；　after　all；　in　a　manner　to　consider。　　It　was　of　course

most　complicated；　only　half　lighted；　but　there　was；　discernibly

enough；　a　scheme　of　communication　in　which　Lady　Bradeen　at　Twindle

and　Dr。　Buzzard　at　Brickwood　were；　within　limits；　one　and　the　same

person。　　The　words　he　had　shown　her　and　then　taken　back　consisted；

at　all　events；　of　the　brief　but　vivid　phrase　〃Absolutely

impossible。〃　　The　point　was　not　that　she　should　transmit　it；　the

point　was　just　that　she　should　see　it。　　What　was　absolutely

impossible　was　that　before　he　had　setted　something　at　Cocker's　he

should　go　either　to　Twindle　or　to　Brickwood。



The　logic　of　this；　in　turn；　for　herself；　was　that　she　could　lend

herself　to　no　settlement　so　long　as　she　so　intensely　knew。　　What

she　knew　was　that　he　was；　almost　under　peril　of　life；　clenched　in　a

situation：　　therefore　how　could　she　also　know　where　a　poor　girl　in

the　P。O。　might　really　stand？　　It　was　more　and　more　between　them

that　if　he　might　convey　to　her　he　was　free；　with　all　the　impossible

locked　away　into　a　closed　chapter；　her　own　case　might　become

different　for　her；　she　might　understand　and　meet　him　and　listen。

But　he　could　convey　nothing　of　the　sort；　and　he　only　fidgeted　and

floundered　in　his　want　of　power。　　The　chapter　wasn't　in　the　least

closed；　not　for　the　other　party；　and　the　other　party　had　a　pull；

somehow　and　somewhere：　　this　his　whole　attitude　and　expression

confessed；　at　the　same　time　that　they　entreated　her　not　to　remember

and　not　to　mind。　　So　long　as　she　did　remember　and　did　mind　he　could

only　circle　about　and　go　and　come；　doing　futile　things　of　which　he

was　ashamed。　　He　was　ashamed　of　his　two　words　to　Dr。　Buzzard；　he

went　out　of　the　shop　as　soon　as　he　had　crumpled　up　the　paper　again

and　thrust　it　into　his　pocket。　　It　had　been　an　abject　little

exposure　of　dreadful　impossible　passion。　　He　appeared　in　fact　to　be

too　ashamed　to　come　back。　　He　had　once　more　left　town；　and　a　first

week　elapsed；　and　a　second。　　He　had　had　naturally　to　return　to　the

real　mistress　of　his　fate；　she　had　insistedshe　knew　how　to

insist；　and　he　couldn't　put　in　another　hour。　　There　was　always　a

day　when　she　called　time。　　It　was　known　to　our　young　friend

moreover　that　he　had　now　been　dispatching　telegrams　from　other

offices。　　She　knew　at　last　so　much　that　she　had　quite　lost　her

earlier　sense　of　merely　guessing。　　There　were　no　different　shades

of　distinctnessit　all　bounced　out。







CHAPTER　XXII







Eighteen　days　elapsed；　and　she　had　begun　to　think　it　probable　she

should　never　see　him　again。　　He　too　then　understood　now：　　he　had

made　out　that　she　had　secrets　and　reasons　and　impediments；　that

even　a　poor　girl　at　the　P。O。　might　have　her　complications。　　With

the　charm　she　had　cast　on　him　lightened　by　distance　he　had　suffered

a　final　delicacy　to　speak　to　him；　had　made　up　his　mind　that　it

would　be　only　decent　to　let　her　alone。　　Never　so　much　as　during

these　latter　days　had　she　felt　the　precariousness　of　their

relationthe　happy　beautiful　untroubled　original　one；　if　it　could

only　have　been　restoredin　which　the　public　servant　and　the　casual

public　only　were　concerned。　　It　hung　at　the　best　by　the　merest

silken　thread；　which　was　at　the　mercy　of　any　accident　and　might

snap　at　any　minute。　　She　arrived　by　the　end　of　the　fortnight　at　the

highest　sense　of　actual　fitness；　never　doubting　that　her　decision

was　now　complete。　　She　would　just　give　him　a　few　days　more　to　come

back　to　her　on　a　proper　impersonal　basisfor　even　to　an

embarrassing　representative　of　the　casual　public　a　public　servant

with　a　conscience　did　owe　somethingand　then　would　signify　to　Mr。

Mudge　that　she　was　ready　for　the　little　home。　　It　had　been　visited；

in　the　further　talk　she　had　had　with　him　at　Bournemouth；　from

garret　to　cellar；　and　they　had　especially　lingered；　with　their

respectively　darkened　brows；　before　the　niche　into　which　it　was　to

be　broached　to　her　mother　that　she　must　find　means　to　fit。



He　had　put　it　to　her　more　definitely　than　before　that　his

calculations　had　allowed　for　that　dingy　presence；　and　he　had

thereby　marked　the　greatest　impression　he　had　ever　made　on　her。　　It

was　a　stroke　superior　even　again　to　his　handling　of　the　drunken

soldier。　　What　she　considered　that　in　the　face　of　it　she　hung　on　at

Cocker's　for　was　something　she　could　only　have　described　as　the

common　fairness　of　a　last　word。　　Her　actual　last　word　had　been；

till　it　should　be　superseded；　that　she　wouldn't　forsake　her　other

friend；　and　it　stuck　to　her　through　thick　and　thin　that　she　was

still　at　her　post　and　on　her　honour。　　This　other　friend　had　shown

so　much　beauty　of　conduct　already　that　he　would　surely　after　all

just　re…appear　long　enough　to　relieve　her；　to　give　her　something

she　could　take　away。　　She　saw　it；　caught　it；　at　times；　his　parting

present；　and　there　were　moments　when　she　felt　herself　sitting　like

a　beggar　with　a　hand　held　out　to　almsgiver　who　only　fumbled。　　She

hadn't　taken　the　sovereigns；　but　she　WOULD　take　the　penny。　　She

heard；　in　imagination；　on　the　counter；　the　ring　of　the　copper。

〃Don't　put　yourself　out　any　longer；〃　he　would　say；　〃for　so　bad　a

case。　　You've　done　all　there　is　to　be　done。　　I　thank　and　acquit　and

release　you。　　Our　lives　take　us。　　I　don't　know　muchthough　I've

really　been　interestedabout　yours；　but　I　suppose　you've　got　one。

Mine　at　any　rate　will　take　MEand　where　it　will。　　Heigh…ho！　　Good…

bye。〃　　And　then　once　more；　for　the　sweetest　faintest　flower　of　all：

〃Only；　I　saysee　here！〃　　She　had　framed　the　whole　picture　with　a

squareness　that　included　also　the　image　of　how　again　she　would

decline　to　〃see　there；〃　decline；　as　she　might　say；　to　see　anywhere；

see　anything。　　Yet　it　befell　that　just　in　the　fury　of　this　escape

she　saw　more　than　ever。



He　came　back　one　night　with　a　rush；　near　the　moment　of　their

closing；　and　showed　her　a　face　so　different　and　new；　so　upset　and

anxious；　that　almost　anything　seemed　to　look　out　of　it　but　clear

recognition。　　He　poked　in　a　telegram　very　much　as　if　the　simple

sense　of　pressure；　the　distress　of　extreme　haste；　had　blurred　the

remembrance　of　where　in　particular　he　was。　　But　as　she　met　his　eyes

a　light　came；　it　broke　indeed　on　the　spot　into　a　positive　conscious

glare。　　That　made　up　for　everything；　since　it　was　an　instant

proclamation　of　the　celebrated　〃danger〃；　it　seemed　to　pour　things

out　in　a　flood。　　〃Oh　yes；　here　it　isit's　upon　me　at　last！

Forget；　for　God's　sake；　my　having　worried　or　bored　you；　and　just

help　me；　just　SAVE　me；　by　getting　this　off　without　the　loss　of　a

second！〃　　Something　grave　had　clearly　occurred；　a　crisis　declared

itself。　　She　recognised　immediately　the　person　to　whom　the　telegram

was　addressedthe　Miss　Dolman　of　Parade　Lodge　to　whom　Lady　Bradeen

had　wired；　at　Dover；　on　the　last　occasion；　and　whom　she　had　then；

with　her　recollection　of　previous　arrangements；　fitted　into　a

particular　setting。　　Miss　Dolman　had　figured　before　and　not　figured

since；　but　she　was　now　the　subject　of　an　imperative　appeal。

〃Absolutely　necessary　to　see　you。　　Take　last　train　Victoria　if　you

can　catch　it。　　If　not；　earliest　morning；　and　answer　me　direct

either　way。〃



〃Reply　paid？〃　said　the　girl。　　Mr。　Buckton　had　just　departed　and　the

counter…clerk　was　at　the　sounder。　　There　was　no　other

representative　of　the　public；　and　she　had　never　yet；　as　it　seemed

to　her；　not　even　in　the　street　or　in　the　Park；　been　so　alone　with

him。



〃Oh　yes；　reply　paid；　and　as　sharp　as　possible；　please。〃



She　affixed　the　stamps　in　a　flash。　　〃She'll　catch　the　train！〃　she

then　declared　to　him　breathlessly；　as　if　she　could　absolutely

guarantee　it。



〃I　don't　knowI　hope　so。　　It's　awfully　important。　　So　kind　of　you。

Awfully　sharp；　please。〃　　It　was　wonderfully　innocent　now；　his

oblivion　of　all　but　his　danger。　　Anything　else　that　had　ever　passed

between　them　was　utterly　out　of　it。　　Well；　she　had　wanted　him　to　be

impersonal！



There　was　less　of　the　same　need　therefore；　happily；　for　herself；

yet　she　only　took　time；　before　she　flew　to　the　sounder；　to　gasp　at

him：　　〃You're　in　trouble？〃



〃Horrid；　horridthere's　a　row！〃　　But　they　parted；　on　it；　in　the

next　breath；　and　as　she　dashed　at　the　sounder；　almost　pushing；　in

her　violence；　the　counter…clerk　off　the　stool；　she　caught　the　bang

with　which；　at　Cocker's　door；　in　his　further　precipitation；　he

closed　the　apron　of　the　cab　into　which　he　had　leaped。　　As　he

rebounded　to　some　other　precaution　suggested　by　his　alarm；　his

appeal　to　Miss　Dolman　flashed　straight　away。



But　she　had　no