gs.earthabides-第17部分

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　　Ish　started　to　say　that　he　would　give　them　his　pistol；　but　checked　himself。　Firearms　were　as　likely　to　create　as　to　solve　difficulties。　In　all　probability　Milt　had　never　fired　a　gun　in　his　life；　and　he　did　not　look　like　an　apt　learner。　As　for　Ann；　she　gave　the　impression　of　being　one　of　those　excitable　women　who　would　be　as　dangerous　to　friend　as　to　foe　if　she　ever　started　cutting　loose　with　a　pistol。　
　　In　spite　of　having　no　motion　pictures　and　no　radio　and　in　spite　of　lacking　even　that　great　and　continual　show　of　the　passing　populace　of　the　city；　still　Milt　and　Ann　did　not　seem　to　be　particularly　bored。　They　played　cribbage；　alternating　with　two…handed　rummy…for　high；　but　of　course　mythical；　stakes。　As　the　result；　Ann　now　owed　Milt　several　millions　of　dollars。　They　played　endless　records…jazz；　folk…songs；　dance…tunes…on　the　tinny　phonograph。　They　read　uncounted　volumes　of　mystery　stories　which　they　got　from　the　circulating　libraries　on　Broadway　and　left　strewn　around　the　apartment。　Physically；　he　guessed；　they　found　each　other　attractive。　
　　But　if　they　were　not　bored；　neither　did　they　seem　to　have　much　pleasure　in　life。　There　was　a　great　vacantness　somewhere。　From　shock　they　were　walking　in　a　kind　of　haze。　They　were　people　without　hope。　New　York；　their　world；　had　vanished；　it　would　never　live　again　in　their　time。　They　had　no　interest　when　Ish　tried　to　tell　them　what　had　happened　in　the　rest　of　the　United　States。　〃Falls　Rome；　falls　the　world。〃　
　　Next　morning　Ann　was　having　another　warm　martini　at　breakfast；　and　still　plaining　that　there　was　not　a　scrap　of　ice　in　New　York　City。　They　urged　him　to　stay　longer；　they　urged　him　even　to　stay　permanently。　He　could　certainly　find　himself　a　girl　somewhere　in　New　York；　they　said；　she　would　make　a　fourth　for　bridge。　They　were　the　pleasantest　people　he　had　found　since　the　catastrophe。　Yet　he　had　no　desire　to　stay　there　with　them；　even　if　he　could　locate　a　girl　for　a　fourth　at　bridge…and　other　things。　No；　he　decided；　he　would　strike　back　for　the　West　again。　
　　But　as　he　drove　off　and　they　stood　at　the　entryway　of　the　apartment…house　and　waved　to　him；　he　almost　turned　back　to　stay　a　while　longer。　He　liked　them；　and　he　pitied　them。　He　hated　to　think　what　would　happen　when　winter　struck；　and　the　deep　canyons　between　the　buildings　were　clogged　with　snow　and　the　north　wind　whistled　down　the　groove　of　Broadway。　There　would　be　no　central　heating　in　New　York　City　that　winter；　though　indeed　there　would　be　plenty　of　ice；　and　no　need　to　drink　warm　martinis。　
　　He　doubted　whether　they　could　survive　the　winter；　even　though　they　piled　broken　furniture　into　the　fireplace。　Some　accident　would　quite　likely　overtake　them；　or　pneumonia　might　strike　them　down。　They　were　like　the　highly　bred　spaniels　and　pekinese　who　at　the　end　of　their　leashes　had　once　walked　along　the　city　streets。　Milt　and　Ann；　too；　were　city…dwellers；　and　when　the　city　died；　they　would　hardly　survive　without　it。　They　would　pay　the　penalty　which　in　the　history　of　the　world；　he　knew；　had　always　been　inflicted　upon　organisms　which　specialized　too　highly。　Milt　and　Ann…the　owner　of　a　jewelry　store；　a　salesgirl　for　perfumes…they　had　specialized　until　they　could　no　longer　adapt　themselves　to　new　conditions。　They　were　almost　at　the　other　end　of　the　scale　from　those　Negroes　in　Arkansas　who　had　so　easily　gone　back　to　the　primitive　way　of　living　on　the　land。　
　　The　Drive　curved；　and　he　knew　that　they　would　now　be　out　of　his　sight；　even　if　he　turned　around。　He　felt　the　warmth　and　fullness　of　tears　in　his　eyes…Good…bye；　Milt　and　Ann！　
　　
　　Chapter　5
　　Headed　west…going　home；　as　he　still　thought　of　it…he　felt　often　as　if　he　were　on　a　leisurely　camping　trip。　A　man　and　his　dog　drove　in　a　car；　and　the　days　slipped　by　uneventfully。　
　　He　crossed　the　rich　farmlands　of　eastern　Pennsylvania　where　the　ripe　unharvested　wheat　was　golden　brown　and　the　　stood　shoulder…high。　When　he　came　to　the　empty　Turnpike；　he　stepped　hard　on　the　accelerator；　and　steered　deliriously　around　the　neatly　banked　curves　at　eighty　and　ninety　miles　an　hour；　careless　of　danger；　intoxicated　with　the　mere　joy　of　speed。　He　went　on　into　Ohio。　
　　By　now　gas…pressure　had　failed　almost　everywhere；　but　he　picked　up　a　two…burner　gasoline　stove　which　functioned　perfectly。　When　the　weather　was　fine；　he　merely　camped　in　the　woods；　and　built　himself　a　fire。　Tinned　goods；　salvaged　from　stores；　still　remained　the　basis　of　his　diet；　but　he　foraged　in　the　cornfields；　and　took　vegetables　and　fruit　when　he　could　find　any。　
　　He　would　have　enjoyed　some　eggs；　but　chickens　seemed　to　have　vanished　pletely。　He　saw　no　ducks　either。　Weasels；　cats；　and　rats；　he　imagined；　had　cleaned　out　this　smaller　poultry；　grown　too　stupid　under　long　domestication　to　live　without　protection。　Once；　however；　he　heard　the　raucous　call　of　guinea…fowl；　and　twice　he　saw　geese　calmly　floating　in　barnyard　ponds。　He　shot　one　of　them；　but　found　he　had　had　the　bad　luck　to　bag　an　old　gander；　too　tough　to　be　made　palatable　by　any　campfire　cookery。　He　often　saw　turkeys　in　the　woods；　and　occasionally　shot　one。　If　Princess　had　been　a　bird…dog；　he　might　have　tried　for　partridges　and　pheasants；　and　though　she　departed　hot　on　the　trail　of　innumerable　rabbits；　she　never　brought　one　back　to　within　range　of　the　shotgun。　In　the　end　he　began　to　wonder　whether　these　always　invisible　rabbits　might　not　be　pure　figments　of　her　imagination。　
　　Cattle　were。　mon　in　the　pastures；　but　he　found　the　thought　of　the　butchering　too　unpleasant；　and　had　no　great　hunger　for　meat　in　the　hot　weather。　He　saw　occasional　small　flocks　of　sheep：　When　the　road　went　through　swampy　country；　he　sometimes　almost　ran　over　hogs；　which　seemed　to　enjoy　stretching　out　in　the　shade　on　the　coolness　of　the　deserted　concrete　pavement。　Lean　dogs　still　haunted　the　towns。　He　rarely　saw　cats；　but　he　sometimes　heard　them　at　night；　and　so　he　judged　that　they　had　already　returned　to　nocturnal　habits。　
　　Avoiding　the　larger　cities；　he　drove　westward…Indiana；　Illinois；　Iowa…through　the　fields　of　tall　corn　and　all　the　empty　little　towns；　sun…flooded　and　empty　by　day；　dark　and　empty　by　night。　Still　he　looked　for　the　small　things　that　showed　how　the　wilderness　was　moving　in　to　take　chargethe　tiny　sprout　of　a　poplar　tree　standing　up　in　the　shaggy　grass　of　a　lawn；　a　telephone　wire　dangling　on　the　road；　the　tracks　of　dried　mud　where　a　coon　had　paused　to　dip　its　food　in　the　water　of　the　fountain　beneath　the　statue　of　the　Civil　War　soldier　in　front　of　the　court…house。　
　　He　came　upon　people　now　generally　by　twos　or　threes　（The　isolated　molecules　were　beginning　to　find　one　another。）　Usually　these　people　were　clinging　to　some　little　spot　that　they　had　known　previous　to　the　disaster。　As　before；　not　one　of　them　showed　any　desire　to　go　away　with　him；　but　sometimes　they　invited　him　to　stay。　He　found　the　offer　no　temptation。　These　people　were　physically　alive；　but　more　and　more　he　realized　that　they　walked　about　in　a　kind　of　emotional　death。　He　had　studied　enough　anthropology　to　realize　that　the　same　phenomenon　had　been　observed　on　a　smaller　scale　before。　Destroy　the　culture…pattem　in　which　people　lived；　and　often　the　shock　was　too　great　for　the　individuals。　Take　away　family　and　job；　friends　and　church；　all　customary　amusements　and　routines；　hope　too…and　life　became　walking　death。　
　　The　Secondary　Kill　was　still　at　work。　Once　he　saw　a　woman　whose　mind　had　failed。　The　clothes　indicated　an　original　prosperity；　but　now　she　was　scarcely　able　to　care　for　herself　and　could　certainly　not　last　through　a　winter。　Several　survivors　told　him　of　others　who　had　mitted　suicide。　
　　As　yet；　though　sometimes　he　wondered；　he　himself　was　conscious　of　no　great　strain　either　of　shock　or　of　loneliness。　He　attributed　this　to　his　maintenance　of　interest　in　the　whole　progress　of　events；　and　to　his　own　peculiar　temperament。　He　thought　many　times　of　his　qualifications　for　the　new　life；　as　he　had　once　listed　them。　
　　Sometimes；　while　he　drove　or　sat　by　his　fire；　erotic　images　rose　to　his　mind。　He　thought　of　Ann　on　Riverside　Drive；　crisp　and　well…groomed　in　her　blondness。　But　she　was　an　exception。　The　usual　women　were　ill…kempt　and　even　dirty；　their　faces　blank　with　mental　apathy；　except　when　they　laughed　hysterically　or　giggled。　Some　of　them　were　obviously　approachable；　but　always　he　felt　desire　wither　away　within　him。　This；　he　realized；　might　be　the　particular　form　that　shock　took　with　him。　But　there　was　no　need　to　force　matters；　in　the　end　he　might　change。　
　　All　across　the　blazing　plains　of　Nebraska　the　wheat　had　not　been　harvested。　Now　it　stood；　losing　its　golden　color；　turning　brown。　The　grains　were　already　dropping　from　the　heads。　Next　year　there　would　be　a　volunteer　crop；　but　all　around　the　edges　other　kinds　of　grass　would　also　sprout　up；　grass　that　could　grow　more　readily　when　the　sod　was　not　disturbed。　Soon；　he　knew　these　native　grasses　would　form　a　sod　and　crowd　out　the　wheat。　
　　Estes　Park　was　restful　after　the　heat　of　the　plains。　He　stayed　there　for　a　week。　The　trout　had　not　struck　at　a　hook　all　summer；　and　the　fishing　was　excellent。　
　　Next　came　the　high　mountains；　and　then　the　desert　again　and　the　sagebrush。　Then　he　was　pressing　his　foot　hard　and　steering　round　the　curves　of　U。S。　40　toward　the　summit　of　Donner　Pass。　
　　On　the　other　side　of　the　Pass　he　suddenly　sensed　that　the　country　all　ahead　was　palled　in　smoke。　〃What　month　is　it；　anyway？〃　he　thought；　〃August？　Early　September；　more　likely。　Bad　forest…fire　season。〃　And　he　remembered　that　now　there　would　be　no　one　to　battle　against　the　fires　which　lightning　would　still　start。　
　　By　Yuba　Gap　he　suddenly　came　to　the　fire。　It　was　burning　low　on　both　sides　of　the　road；　and　he　chanced　running　through　it。　The　highway　was　wide；　and　things　were　not　too　hot；　until　on　rounding　a　curve　he　came　squarely　upon　a　snag；　fallen　and　blocking　the　way　pletely；　blazing　along　its　whole　length；　fierce　with　heat。　Suddenly　he　again　felt　the　old　fear　which　he　had　shaken　off　（years　ago；　it　seemed）　that　morning　in　the　desert…the　utter　loneliness　to　face　an　emergency　or　recover　from　any　accident。　
　　There　was　nothing　for　it　but　to　turn　the　car　around　on　the　highway。　He　shuttled　back　and　forth　twice；　killing　the　engine　in　his　panicky　haste。　It　sta