gs.earthabides-第24部分

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ly；　he　was　sure）；　and　had　had　two　small　children。　She　had　gone　to　high　school　but　not　to　college；　her　grammar　lapsed　occasionally。　Her　soft　accent；　which　he　had　noticed　when　she　first　spoke；　had　perhaps　the　touch　of　Kentucky　or　Tennessee　in　it。　
　　But　she　never　mentioned　having　lived　anywhere　except　in　California。　
　　Her　social　status　must　have　been；　Ish　judged；　somewhat　lower　than　his。　But　there　was　nothing　more　ridiculous　to　contemplate；　now；　than　all　that　business　of　social　classes。　
　　〃Amazing；　how　little　everything　Re　that　matters　now！〃　And　the　days　slid　by　easily。　
　　One　morning；　finding　that　they　needed　some　supplies；　he　went　down　to　start　the　car。　He　put　his　thumb　on　the　smrter　button。　There　was　a　sudden　click；　nothing　more。　He　pressed　it　again；　and　it　clicked。　That　was　all。　
　　He　heard　no　sudden　forting　whir　as　the　motor　took　over；　no　reassuring　little　bangs　as　the　cold　cylinders　began　to　fire。　Panic　fell　upon　him　again。　He　pressed　the　button　once　more；　and　still　once　more；　and　every　time　came　only　the　little　click。　〃Battery　gone！〃　he　thought。　
　　He　got　out；　raised　the　hood　of　the　car；　and　stared　hopelessly　at　the　orderly　but　plex　array　of　wires　and　gadgets。　It　was　too　much　for　him。　He　had　a　sudden　hopeless　feeling　within　him；　he　went　back　to　the　house。　
　　〃The　car　won't　start；〃　he　said。　〃Battery　gone；　or　something！〃　He　knew　that　his　face　must　be　even　more　woebegone　than　his　voice。　That　was　why　he　could　hardly　believe　it；　when　she　laughed。　〃There's　no　place　we　have　to　go　so　badly　as　all　that；〃　she　said。　〃To　look　at　you；　you'd　think　that　things　had　gone　to　pieces！〃　
　　Then　he　laughed　too。　It　made　all　the　difference　in　the　world　whether　you　had　that　other　to　cut　the　grief　in　half；　and　the　trouble　suddenly　seemed　tiny。　A　car　was　convenient　when　you　wanted　to　go　to　the　stores　and　load　up　with　some　more　supplies。　But　you　could　live　just　as　well　without　a　car。　She　was　right…they　had　really　no　place　that　they　needed　so　badly　to　go！　
　　He　had　imagined　a　desperate　day；　tying　to　find　a　new　car　or　to　fix　up　the　old　one。　As　it　was；　they　made　it　a　sport；　even　though　it　did　take　them　most　of　the　morning　before　they　located　another　one。　Most　of　the　cars　had　no　keys　in　them；　and　while　he　might　have　shorted　a　wire　somewhere；　they　agreed　that　it　would　be　an　inconvenience　to　have　to　drive　a　car　without　a　key。　And　when　they　found　one　with　a　key　in　it；　the　battery；　unused　now　for　several　months；　would　not　work。　At　last　they　found　one　that　had　a　key　in　it；　and　was　parked　on　a　hill。　The　battery　was　too　weak　to　turn　the　engine　over；　but　it　would　burn　the　lights　faintly；　and　Ish　judged　that　it　would　send　out　enough　of　a　current　to　fire　the　spark…plugs。　
　　They　got　the　car　rolling　downhill；　and　then　after　a　minute　the　cylinders　began　to　bang　and　putter　and　backfire。　Ish　and　Em　laughed　together　happily　at　the　adventure　of　it。　At　last　the　gasoline　worked　up　through　the　feed…pipes；　and　the　engine　warmed；　and　began　to　run　smoothly。　Now　they　laughed　in　triumph；　and　went　speeding　at　sixty　miles　an　hour　down　the　empty　boulevard；　and　Em　leaned　over　and　kissed　him。　And　suddenly；　queer　as　it　seemed；　Ish　realized　that　he　had　never　felt　so　happy　in　his　life。　
　　This　car　was　not　such　a　good　one　as　the　station…wagon。　Because　of　this；　they　used　it　merely　to　make　some　exploration　through　the　warehouse　district；　checking　up　in　the　classified　telephone　book　to　locate　dealers　in　batteries。　At　last　they　forced　the　entrance　to　the　proper　room　and　found　dozens　of　batteries　with　the　acid　not　yet　in　them。　There　were　also　supplies　of　acid；　and　although　neither　of　them　was　mechanically　minded；　they　made　the　experiment　of　pouring　the　acid　into　a　battery　of　the　right　size。　They　took　it　back；　and　put　it　into　the　station…wagon。　It　worked　perfectly；　the　first　time。　
　　As　at　last　the　motor　of　the　station…wagon　hummed　tunefully；　responding　to　the　pressure　of　his　foot　on　the　throttle；　Ish　thought　that　on　that　day　he　had　met；　and　faced；　two　problems。　First；　he　had　seen　that　he　could　do　a　great　deal　toward　keeping　a　car　running　for　a　long　time。　But　of　even　greater　importance；　he　had　faced　the　possibility　that　there　would　e　a　time　when　there　would　no　longer　be　any　cars；　and　yet　still　he　could　live　happily　and　without　fear。　
　　The　next　day；　indeed；　the　new　battery　in　the　station…wagon　was　dead　again。　Either　it　was　defective　or　he　had　made　some　mistake　in　installing　it。　This　time；　however；　he　was　in　no　panic。　In　fact　he　did　not　even　bother　to　do　anything　about　it　for　a　couple；　of　days。　Then　they　repeated　the　process。　Either　by　luck　or　by　greater　care；　they　had　better　success；　and　the　battery　continued　to　work。　
　　Sleek　with　lacquer；　shining　with　chromium；　their　motors　machined　to　the　thousandth　of　the　inch；　their　mutators　accurate　as　watches；　they　had　been　the　pride　and　the　symbol　of　civilization。　
　　Now；　they　were　locked　ingloriously　in　garages；　or　stood　in　the　lots；　or　were　parked　at　the　curb。　The　dead　leaves　dropped；　the　blowing　dust　settled。　The　rains　fell；　and　spotted　the　dust；　and　made　the　leaves　stick　more　tightly　and　then　more　dust　and　more　leavesfell。　The　windshields　were　so　thickly　coated　that　you　could　scarcely　see　through　them　now。　
　　More　deeply；　they　changed　little。　The　rust　ate　here　and　there；　but　on　the　grease…smeared　surfaces　it　could　not　work　rapidly。　Unused；　the　coils　and　the　timers；　the　carburetors　and　the　spark…plugs；　all　remained　as　good　as　ever。　
　　In　the　batteries　the　slow　processes　of　chemistry　worked　day　and　night；　breaking　down；　neutralizing。　A　few　months；　and　the　unused　batteries　were　dead。　But　as　long　as　the　battery　and　acid　were　kept　separate；　neither　deteriorated；　and　it　would　always　be　a　small　matter　to　add　the　acid　and　start　out　again　with　a　new　battery；　the　batteries　were　not　the　weakest　link。　
　　More　likely　it　was　the　tires。　In　the　rubber　the　processes　of　decay　worked　slowly。　The　tires　would　last　a　year；　five　years。　But　nevertheless；　the　weakness　worked　in　them。　The　air　leaked　from　the　tires；　and　after　the　car　had　stood　on　the　flat　tires　for　a　while；　they　were　no　longer　of　any　use。　Even　in　the　warehouses；　decay　worked　in　the　rubber。　The　stored　tires　would　have　ten　years；　and　still　some　life。　Twenty　years　they　would　last；　perhaps　even　more。　Quite　likely　the　roads；　themselves；　would　be　broken　and　men　forget　how　to　drive　cars　and　lose　the　desire　for　driving　them　before　the　cars　themselves　were　rendered　undrivable。　
　　Her　head　rested　in　the　crook　of　his　arm；　and　he　looked　down　upon　the　black　liquid　eyes。　They　lay　on　the　davenport　in　the　living…room。　Her　face　looked　darker　than　ever　now　in　the　twilight。　
　　There　was　one　question；　he　knew；　that　they　had　not　yet　faced；　and　now　she　brought　it　forward。　
　　〃That　would　be　fine！〃　she　said。　
　　〃I　don't　know。〃　
　　〃Yes；　it　would。〃　
　　〃I　don't　like　it。〃　
　　〃You　mean　you　don't　like　it　about　me？〃。　
　　〃Yes。　It's　dangerous。　There'd　be　no　one　else　but　me；　and　I　wouldn't　be　any　use。〃　
　　〃But　you　can　read…all　the　books。〃　
　　〃Books！〃　he　laughed　a　little　as　he　spoke。　〃The　Practical　Midwife？　The　Pathology　of　Parturition？　I　don't　think　I'd　like　to　face　it；　even　if　you　would。〃　
　　〃But；　yet；　you　really　could　find　some　books　and　read　them。　That　would　be　a　lot　of　use。　And　I　wouldn't　really　need　so　much　help。〃　She　paused　a　moment：　〃I've　been　through　it　twice　before；　you　know。　It　wasn't　bad。〃　
　　〃Maybe　not。　But　it　might　be　different　this　time　without　hospitals　and　doctors　and　all　that。　And　just　why；　why　do　you　think　so　much　about　it？〃　
　　〃Biology；　don't　they　call　it；　or　something　like　that？　I　guess　it's　natural。〃　
　　〃Do　you　think　life　must　go　on；　we　have　a　duty　to　the　future；　all　that？〃　
　　She　paused　a　minute。　He　could　tell　that　she　was　thinking；　and　thinking　was　not　the　best　thing　that　she　did；　she　reacted　at　deeper　levels　than　those　of　mere　thought。　
　　〃Oh；　I　don't　know；〃　she　said。　〃I　don't　know　whether　life　needs　to　go　on。　Why　should　it？　Just　as　likely　I'm　selfish。　I　want　a　baby　for　myself。　I　mean；　oh；　I　don't　talk　this　sort　of　thing　well。　I'd　like　to　be　kissed；　though。〃　He　did　it。　
　　〃I　wish　I　could　talk；〃　she　said。　〃I　wish　I　could　tell　what　it　is　I　think　about　it。〃　
　　Then　she　stretched　her　arm　out；　and　took　a　match　from　the　box　on　the　table。　She　smoked；　more　than　he　did；　and　he　expected　her　to　take　a　cigarette　also。　But　she　did　not。　It　was　a　big　kitchen…match；　the　kind　she　liked。　She　turned　it　between　thumb　and　finger；　saying　nothing。　Then　she　scratched　it　against　the　box。　
　　The　matchhead　spurted　into　a　flare。　Then　the　fierceness　faded　out；　and　the　wood　of　the　match…shank　burned　quietly　in　yellow　flame。　Suddenly　she　blew　it　out。　
　　Vaguely　he　knew　that　she；　who　did　not　find　words　easily；　had　tried…perhaps　half　unconsciously…to　act　out　something　that　she　could　not　say。　Slowly　he　thought　that　he　understood。　The　match　lived；　not　when　it　lay　in　the　box；　but　merely　when　it　burned…and　it　could　not　burn　forever。　So　too　with　men　and　women。　Not　by　denying　life　was　life　lived。　
　　He　thought　then　of　his　old　fear　during　the　first　days　and　of　the　time　when　he　had　overthrown　it；　when　he　had　unlashed　the　motorcycle　from　the　tail…gate　of　the　station…wagon　in　the　desert　and　tossed　it　to　one　side。　He　remembered　the　wild　feeling　of　exaltation　which　had　e　when　he　had　offered　defiance　to　death　and　all　the　powers　of　darkness。　He　felt　her　body　stir　gently　in　his　arms。　Yes；　he　thought　humbly；　that　strong　courage　was　his　only　at　great　moments…with　her　it　was　part　of　daily　life。　
　　〃All　right；〃　he　said；　〃I　suppose　you're　right。　I'll　read　the　books。〃　
　　〃You　know；〃　she　said；　〃I　might　need　a　little　more　help　than　that！〃　
　　Her　body　was　close　and　warm　against　him。　Still　he　held　back；　feeling　all　the　loneliness　and　the　emptiness　and　the　terror。　Who　was　he　to　set　mankind　again　on　the　long　and　uncertain　road　to　the　future？　But　it　was　only　for　a　moment。　Then　her　courage　and　the　confidence　of　her　courage　flowed　out　from　her　to　him。　〃Yes；〃　he　thought；　〃she　will　be　the　mother　of　nations！　Without　courage　there　is　nothing！〃　
　　And　then　suddenly　he　was　conscious　again　of　her　body；　and　his　strength　came　upon　him。　
　　To　thee　be　the　glory；　because　the　love　of　life　was　brighter　before　thy　face　than　the　fear　of　death　was　dark。　Thou　art　Demeter　and　Hert