lmb.shardsofhonor-第45部分

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n　we　were　undressing　him　for　surgery；　he　tried　to　fight　us　for　it。　It　took　three　of　us　to　hold　him　down　for　the　anesthetic。　I　thought　it　a　rather　remarkable　performance　for　a　man　whose　legs　had　been　blown　away。　He　wept。。。　Of　course；　he　was　in　shock。〃
　Ferrell　dangled　the　locket　on　the　end　of　its　short　chain；　intrigued　in　spite　of　himself。　It　hung　with　a　panion　piece；　a　curl　of　hair　embedded　in　a　plastic　pendant。
　〃Some　sort　of　holy　water；　is　it？〃　he　inquired。
　〃Almost。　It's　a　very　mon　design。　It's　called　a　mother's　tears　charm。　Let　me　see　if　I　can　make　out…he's　had　it　a　while；　it　seems。　From　the　inscription…I　think　that　says　'ensign；'　and　the　date…it　must　have　been　given　him　on　the　occasion　of　his　mission。〃
　〃It's　not　really　his　mother's　tears；　is　it？〃
　〃Oh；　yes。　That's　what's　supposed　to　make　it　work；　as　a　protection。〃
　〃Doesn't　seem　to　be　very　effective。〃
　〃No；　well。。。　no。〃
　Ferrell　snorted　ironically。　〃I　hate　those　guys…but　I　do　guess　I　feel　sort　of　sorry　for　his　mother。〃
　Boni　retrieved　the　chain　and　its　pendants；　holding　the　curl　in　plastic　to　the　light　and　reading　its　inscription。　〃No；　not　at　all。　She's　a　fortunate　woman。〃
　〃How　so？〃
　〃This　is　her　death　lock。　She　died　three　years　ago；　by　this。〃
　〃Is　that　supposed　to　be　lucky；　too？〃
　〃No；　not　necessarily。　Just　a　remembrance；　as　far　as　I　know。　Kind　of　a　nice　one；　really。　The　nastiest　charm　I　ever　ran　across；　and　the　most　unique；　was　this　little　leather　bag　hung　around　a　fellow's　neck。　It　was　filled　with　dirt　and　leaves；　and　what　I　took　at　first　to　be　some　sort　of　little　frog…like　animal　skeleton；　about　ten　centimeters　long。　But　when　I　looked　at　it　more　closely；　it　turned　out　to　be　the　skeleton　of　a　human　fetus。　Very　strange。　I　suppose　it　was　some　sort　of　black　magic。　Seemed　an　odd　thing　to　find　on　an　engineering　officer。〃
　〃Doesn't　seem　to　work　for　any　of　them；　does　it？〃
　She　smiled　wryly。　〃Well；　if　there　are　any　that　work；　I　wouldn't　see　them；　would　I？〃
　She　took　the　processing　one　step　further；　by　cleaning　the　Barrayaran's　clothes　and　carefully　re…dressing　him；　before　bagging　him　and　returning　him　to　the　freeze。
　〃The　Barrayarans　are　all　so　army…mad；〃　she　explained。　〃I　always　like　to　put　them　back　in　their　uniforms。　They　mean　so　much　to　them；　I'm　sure　they're　more　fortable　with　them　on。〃
　Ferrell　frowned　uneasily。　〃I　still　think　he　ought　to　be　dumped　with　the　rest　of　the　garbage。〃
　〃Not　at　all；〃　said　the　medtech。　〃Think　of　all　the　work　he　represents　on　somebody's　part。　Nine　months　of　pregnancy；　childbirth；　two　years　of　diapering；　and　that's　just　the　beginning。　Tens　of　thousands　of　meals；　thousands　of　bedtime　stories；　years　of　school。　Dozens　of　teachers。　And　all　that　military　training；　too。　A　lot　of　people　went　into　making　him。〃
　She　smoothed　a　strand　of　the　corpse's　hair　into　place。　〃That　head　held　the　universe；　once。　He　had　a　good　rank　for　his　age；〃　she　added；　rechecking　her　monitor。　〃Thirty…two。　mander　Aristede　Vorkalloner。　It　has　a　kind　of　nice　ethnic　ring。　Very　Barrayaranish；　that　name。　Vor；　too；　one　of　those　warrior…class　fellows。〃
　〃Homicidal…class　loonies。　Or　worse；〃　Ferrell　said　automatically。　But　his　vehemence　had　lost　momentum；　somehow。
　Boni　shrugged；　〃Well；　he's　joined　the　great　democracy　now。　And　he　had　nice　pockets。〃
　Three　full　days　went　by　with　no　further　alarms　but　a　rare　scattering　of　mechanical　debris。　Ferrell　began　to　hope　the　Barrayaran　was　the　last　pickup　they　would　have　to　make。　They　were　nearing　the　end　of　their　search　pattern。　Besides；　he　thought　resentfully；　this　duty　was　sabotaging　the　efficiency　of　his　sleep　cycle。　But　the　medtech　made　a　request。
　〃If　you　don't　mind；　Falco；〃　she　said；　〃I'd　greatly　appreciate　it　if　we　could　run　the　pattern　out　just　a　few　extra　turns。　The　original　orders　are　based　on　this　average　estimated　trajectory　speed；　you　see；　and　if　someone　just　happened　to　get　a　bit　of　extra　kick　when　the　ship　split；　they　could　well　be　beyond　it　by　now。〃
　Ferrell　was　less　than　thrilled；　but　the　prospect　of　an　extra　day　of　piloting　had　its　attractions；　and　he　gave　a　grudging　consent。　Her　reasoning　proved　itself；　before　the　day　was　half　done；　they　turned　up　another　gruesome　relic。
　〃Oh；〃　muttered　Ferrell；　when　they　got　a　close　look。　It　had　been　a　female　officer。　Boni　reeled　her　in　with　enormous　tenderness。　He　didn't　really　want　to　go　watch；　this　time；　but　the　medtech　seemed　to　have　e　to　expect　him。
　〃I…don't　really　want　to　look　at　a　woman　blown　up；〃　he　tried　to　excuse　himself。
　〃Mm；〃　said　Tersa。　〃Is　it　fair；　though；　to　reject　a　person　just　because　they're　dead？　You　wouldn't　have　minded　her　body　a　bit　when　she　was　alive。〃
　He　laughed　a　little；　macabrely。　〃Equal　rights　for　the　dead？〃
　Her　smile　twisted。　〃Why　not？　Some　of　my　best　friends　are　corpses。〃
　He　snorted。
　She　grew　more　serious。　〃I'd…sort　of　like　the　pany；　on　this　one。〃　So　he　took　up　his　usual　station　by　the　door。
　The　medtech　laid　out　the　thing　that　had　been　a　woman　upon　her　table；　undressed；　inventoried；　washed；　and　straightened　it。　When　she　finished；　she　kissed　the　dead　lips。
　〃Oh；　God；〃　cried　Ferrell；　shocked　and　nauseated。　〃You　are　crazy！　You're　a　damn；　damn　necrophiliac！　A　lesbian　necrophiliac；　at　that！〃　He　turned　to　go。
　〃Is　that　what　it　looks　like；　to　you？〃　Her　voice　was　soft；　and　still　unoffended。　It　stopped　him；　and　he　looked　over　his　shoulder。　She　was　looking　at　him　as　gently　as　if　he　had　been　one　of　her　precious　corpses。　〃What　a　strange　world　you　must　live　in；　inside　your　head。〃
　She　opened　a　suitcase；　and　shook　out　a　dress；　fine　underwear；　and　a　pair　of　white　embroidered　slippers。　A　wedding　dress；　Ferrell　realized。　This　woman　is　a　bona　fide　psychopath。。。
　She　dressed　the　corpse；　and　arranged　its　soft　dark　hair　with　great　delicacy；　before　bagging　it。
　〃I　believe　I　shall　place　her　next　to　that　nice　tall　Barrayaran；〃　she　said。　〃I　think　they　would　have　liked　each　other　very　well；　if　they　could　have　met　in　another　place　and　time。　And　Lieutenant　Deleo　was　married；　after　all。〃
　She　pleted　the　label。　Ferrell's　battered　mind　was　sending　him　little　subliminal　messages；　he　struggled　to　overe　his　shock　and　bemusement；　and　pay　attention。　It　tumbled　into　the　open　day　of　his　consciousness　with　a　start。
　She　had　not　run　an　identification　check　on　this　one。
　Out　the　door；　he　told　himself；　is　the　way　you　want　to　walk。　I　guarantee　it。　Instead；　timorously；　he　went　over　to　the　corpse　and　checked　its　label。
　Ensign　Sylva　Boni；　it　said。　Age　twenty。　His　own　age。。。
　He　was　trembling；　as　if　with　cold。　It　was　cold；　in　that　room。　Tersa　Boni　finished　packing　up　the　suitcase；　and　turned　back　with　the　float　pallet。
　〃Daughter？〃　he　asked。　It　was　all　he　could　ask。
　She　pursed　her　lips；　and　nodded。
　〃It's…a　helluva　coincidence。〃
　〃No　coincidence　at　all。　I　asked　for　this　sector。〃
　〃Oh。〃　He　swallowed；　turned　away；　turned　back；　face　flaming。　〃I'm　sorry　I　said…〃
　She　smiled　her　slow　sad　smile。　〃Never　mind。〃
　They　found　yet　one　more　bit　of　mechanical　debris；　so　agreed　to　run　another　cycle　of　the　search　spiral；　to　be　sure　that　all　possible　trajectories　had　been　outdistanced。　And　yes；　they　found　another；　a　nasty　one；　spinning　fiercely；　guts　split　open　from　some　great　blow　and　hanging　out　in　a　frozen　cascade。
　The　acolyte　of　death　did　her　dirty　work　without　once　so　much　as　wrinkling　her　nose。　When　it　came　to　the　washing；　the　least　technical　of　the　tasks；　Ferrell　said　suddenly；　〃May　I　help？〃
　〃Certainly；〃　said　the　medtech；　moving　aside。　〃An　honor　is　not　diminished　for　being　shared。〃
　And　so　he　did；　as　shy　as　an　apprentice　saint　washing　his　first　leper。
　〃Don't　be　afraid；〃　she　said。　〃The　dead　cannot　hurt　you。　They　give　you　no　pain；　except　that　of　seeing　your　own　death　in　their　faces。　And　one　can　face　that；　I　find。〃
　Yes；　he　thought；　the　good　face　pain。　But　the　great…they　embrace　it。
　



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