rh.theassassinsapprentice-第34部分

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　　　　　　　Chade　gave　a　derisive　snort。　〃Path？　I　had　a　quick　look　while　you　were　pulling　in　my　horse。　It's　no　path；　it's　no　more　than　the　course　the　water　takes　when　it　runs　off　down　the　cliffs。　But　it　will　have　to　do。〃
　　　　　　　It　was　a　little　better　than　he　had　reported；　but　not　much。　It　was　narrow　and　steep　and　the　gravel　on　it　was　loose　underfoot。　Chade　went　before　with　the　lantern。　I　followed；　with　the　horses　in　tandem。　At　one　point　Chade's　bay　acted　up；　tugging　back；　throwing　me　off　balance　and　nearly　driving　Sooty　to　her　knees　in　her　efforts　to　go　in　the　other　direction。　My　heart　was　in　my　mouth　until　we　reached　the　top　of　the　cliffs。
　　　　　　　Then　the　night　and　the　open　hillside　spread　out　before　us　under　the　sailing　moon　and　the　stars　scattered　wide　overhead；　and　the　spirit　of　the　challenge　caught　me　up　again。　I　suppose　it　could　have　been　Chade's　attitude。　The　carris　seed　made　his　eyes　wide　and　bright；　even　by　lantern　light；　and　his　energy；　unnatural　though　it　was；　was　infectious。　Even　the　horses　seemed　affected；　snorting　and　tossing　their　heads。　Chade　and　I　laughed　dementedly　as　we　adjusted　harness　and　then　mounted。　Chade　glanced　up　to　the　stars　and　then　around　the　hillside　that　sloped　down　before　us。　With　careless　disdain　he　tossed　our　lantern　to　one　side。
　　　　　　　〃Away！〃　he　announced　to　the　night；　and　kicked　the　bay；　who　sprang　forward。　Sooty　was　not　to　be　outdone；　and　so　I　did　as　I　had　never　dared　before；　galloping　down　unfamiliar　terrain　by　night。　It　is　a　wonder　we　did　not　all　break　our　necks。　But　there　it　is；　sometimes　luck　belongs　to　children　and　madmen。　That　night　I　felt　we　were　both。
　　　　　　　Chade　led　and　I　followed。　That　night　I　grasped　another　piece　of　the　puzzle　that　Burrich　had　always　been　to　me。　For　there　is　a　very　strange　peace　in　giving　over　your　judgment　to　someone　else；　to　saying　to　them；　〃You　lead　and　I　will　follow；　and　I　will　trust　entirely　that　you　will　not　lead　me　to　death　or　harm。〃　That　night；　as　we　pushed　the　horses　hard；　and　Chade　steered　us　solely　by　the　night　sky；　I　gave　no　thought　to　what　might　befall　us　if　we　went　astray　from　our　bearing；　or　if　a　horse　were　injured　by　an　unexpected　slip。　I　felt　no　sense　of　accountability　for　my　actions。　Suddenly　everything　was　easy　and　clear。　I　simply　did　whatever　Chade　told　me　to　do；　and　trusted　to　him　to　have　it　turn　out　right。　My　spirit　rode　high　on　the　crest　of　that　wave　of　faith；　and　sometime　during　the　night　it　occurred　to　me：　This　was　what　Burrich　had　gotten　from　Chivalry；　and　what　he　missed　so　badly。
　　　　　　　We　rode　the　entire　night。　Chade　breathed　the　horses；　but　not　as　often　as　Burrich　would　have。　And　he　stopped　more　than　once　to　scan　the　night　sky　and　then　the　horizon　to　be　sure　our　course　was　true。　〃See　that　hill　there；　against　the　stars？　You　can't　see　it　too　well；　but　I　know　it。　By　light；　it's　shaped　like　a　butter　monger's　cap。　Keeffashaw；　it's　called。　We　keep　it　to　the　west　of　us。　Let's　go。〃
　　　　　　　Another　time　he　paused　on　a　hilltop。　I　pulled　in　my　horse　beside　his。　Chade　sat　still；　very　tall　and　straight。　He　could　have　been　carved　of　stone。　Then　he　lifted　an　arm　and　pointed。　His　hand　shook　slightly。　〃See　that　ravine　down　there？　We've　e　a　bit　too　far　to　the　east。　We'll　have　to　correct　as　we　go。〃
　　　　　　　The　ravine　was　invisible　to　me；　a　darker　slash　in　the　dimness　of　the　starlit　landscape。　I　wondered　how　he　could　have　known　it　was　there。　It　was　perhaps　half　an　hour　later　that　he　gestured　off　to　our　left；　where　on　a　rise　of　land　a　single　light　twinkled。　〃Someone's　up　tonight　in　Woolcot；〃　he　observed。　〃Probably　the　baker；　putting　early　morning　rolls　to　rise。〃　He　half　turned　in　his　saddle　and　I　felt　more　than　saw　his　smile。　〃I　was　born　less　than　a　mile　from　here。　e；　boy；　let's　ride。　I　don't　like　to　think　of　raiders　so　close　to　Woolcot。〃
　　　　　　　And　on　we　went；　down　a　hillside　so　steep　that　I　felt　Sooty's　muscles　bunch　as　she　leaned　back　on　her　haunches　and　more　than　half　slid　her　way　down。
　　　　　　　Dawn　was　graying　the　sky　before　I　smelled　the　sea　again。　And　it　was　still　early　when　we　crested　a　rise　and　looked　down　on　the　little　village　of　Forge。　It　was　a　poor　place　in　some　ways；　the　anchorage　was　good　only　on　certain　tides。　The　rest　of　the　time　the　ships　had　to　anchor　farther　out　and　let　small　craft　ply　back　and　forth　between　them　and　shore。　About　all　that　Forge　had　to　keep　it　on　the　map　was　iron　ore。　I　had　not　expected　to　see　a　bustling　city。　But　neither　was　I　prepared　for　the　rising　tendrils　of　smoke　from　blackened　open…roofed　buildings。　Somewhere　an　unmilked　cow　was　lowing。　A　few　scuttled　boats　were　just　off　the　shore；　their　masts　sticking　up　like　dead　trees。
　　　　　　　Morning　looked　down　on　empty　streets。　〃Where　are　the　people？〃　I　wondered　aloud。
　　　　　　　〃Dead；　taken　hostage；　or　hiding　in　the　woods　still。〃　There　was　a　tightness　in　Chade's　voice　that　drew　my　eyes　to　his　face。　I　was　amazed　at　the　pain　I　saw　there。　He　saw　me　staring　at　him　and　shrugged　mutely。　〃The　feeling　that　these　folk　belong　to　you；　that　their　disaster　is　your　failure　。。。　it　will　e　to　you　as　you　grow。　It　goes　with　the　blood。〃　He　left　me　to　ponder　that　as　he　nudged　his　weary　mount　into　a　walk。　We　threaded　our　way　down　the　hill　and　into　the　town。
　　　　　　　Going　more　slowly　seemed　to　be　the　only　caution　Chade　was　taking。　There　were　two　of　us；　weaponless；　on　tired　horses；　riding　into　a　town　where　。。。
　　　　　　　〃The　ship's　gone；　boy。　A　raiding　ship　doesn't　move　without　a　full　plement　of　rowers。　Not　in　the　current　off　this　piece　of　coast。　Which　is　another　wonder。　How　did　they　know　our　tides　and　currents　well　enough　to　raid　here？　Why　raid　here　at　all？　To　carry　off　iron　ore？　Easier　by　far　for　them　to　pirate　it　off　a　trading　ship。　It　doesn't　make　sense；　boy。　No　sense　at　all。〃
　　　　　　　Dew　had　settled　heavily　the　night　before。　There　was　a　rising　stench　in　the　town；　of　burned　wet　homes。　Here　and　there　a　few　still　smoldered。　In　front　of　some；　possessions　were　strewn　out　into　the　street；　but　I　did　not　know　if　the　inhabitants　had　tried　to　save　some　of　their　goods；　or　if　the　raiders　had　begun　to　carry　things　off　and　then　changed　their　minds。　A　saltbox　without　a　lid；　several　yards　of　green　woolen　goods；　a　shoe；　a　broken　chair：　the　litter　spoke　mutely　but　eloquently　of　all　that　was　homely　and　safe　broken　forever　and　trampled　in　the　mud。　A　grim　horror　settled　on　me。
　　　　　　　〃We're　too　late；〃　Chade　said　softly。　He　reined　his　horse　in　and　Sooty　stopped　beside　him。
　　　　　　　〃What？〃　I　asked　stupidly；　jolted　from　my　thoughts。
　　　　　　　〃The　hostages。　They　returned　them。〃
　　　　　　　〃Where？〃
　　　　　　　Chade　looked　at　me　incredulously；　as　if　I　were　insane　or　very　stupid。　〃There。　In　the　ruins　of　that　building。〃
　　　　　　　It　is　difficult　to　explain　what　happened　to　me　in　the　next　moment　of　my　life。　So　much　occurred；　all　at　once。　I　lifted　my　eyes　to　see　a　group　of　people；　all　ages　and　sexes；　within　the　burned…out　shell　of　some　kind　of　store。　They　were　muttering　among　themselves　as　they　scavenged　in　it。　They　were　bedraggled；　but　seemed　unconcerned　by　it。　As　I　watched；　two　women　picked　up　the　same　kettle　at　once；　a　large　kettle；　and　then　proceeded　to　slap　at　one　another；　each　attempting　to　drive　off　the　other　and　claim　the　loot。　They　reminded　me　of　a　couple　of　crows　fighting　over　a　cheese　rind。　They　squawked　and　slapped　and　called　one　another　vile　names　as　they　tugged　at　the　opposing　handles。　The　other　folk　paid　them　no　mind；　but　went　on　with　their　own　looting。
　　　　　　　This　was　very　strange　behavior　for　village　folk。　Always　I　had　heard　of　how　after　a　raid；　village　folk　banded　together；　cleaning　out　and　making　habitable　what　buildings　were　left　standing；　and　then　helping　one　another　salvage　cherished　possessions；　sharing　and　making　do　until　cottages　could　be　rebuilt；　and　store　buildings　replaced。　But　these　folk　seemed　pletely　careless　that　they　had　lost　nearly　everything　and　that　family　and　friends　had　died　in　the　raid。　Instead；　they　had　gathered　to　fight　over　what　little　was　left。
　　　　　　　This　realization　was　horrifying　enough　to　behold。
　　　　　　　But　I　couldn't　feel　them　either。
　　　　　　　I　hadn't　seen　or　heard　them　until　Chade　pointed　them　out。　I　would　have　ridden　right　past　them。　And　the　other　momentous　thing　that　happened　to　me　at　that　point　was　that　I　realized　I　was　different　from　everyone　else　I　knew。　Imagine　a　seeing　child　growing　up　in　a　blind　village；　where　no　one　else　even　suspects　the　possibility　of　such　a　sense。　The　child　would　have　no　words　for　colors；　or　for　degrees　of　light。　The　others　would　have　no　conception　of　the　way　in　which　the　child　perceived　the　world。　So　it　was　in　that　moment　as　we　sat　our　horses　and　stared　at　the　folk。　For　Chade　wondered　out　loud；　misery　in　his　voice；　〃What　is　wrong　with　them？　What's　gotten　into　them？〃
　　　　　　　I　knew。
　　　　　　　All　the　threads　that　run　back　and　forth　between　folk；　that　twine　from　mother　to　child；　from　man　to　woman；　all　the　kinships　they　extend　to　family　and　neighbor；　to　pets　and　stock；　even　to　the　fish　of　the　sea　and　bird　of　the　sky…all；　all　were　gone。
　　　　　　　All　my　life；　without　knowing　it；　I　had　depended　on　those　threads　of　feelings　to　let　me　know　when　other　live　things　were　about。　Dogs；　horses；　even　chickens　had　them；　as　well　as　humans。　And　so　I　would　look　up　at　the　door　before　Burrich　entered　it；　or　know　there　was　one　more　newborn　puppy　in　the　stall；　nearly　buried　under　the　straw。　So　I　would　wake　when　Chade　opened　the　staircase。　Because　I　could　feel　people。　And　that　sense　was　the　one　that　always　alerted　me　first；　that　let　me　know　to　use　my　eyes　and　ears　and　nose　as　well；　to　see　what　they　were　about。
　　　　　　　But　these　folk　gave　off　no　feelings　at　all。
　　　　　　　Imagine　water　with　no　weight　or　wetness。　That　is　how　those　folk　were　to　me。　Stripped　of　what　made　them　not　only　human；　but　alive。　To　me；　it　was　as　if　I　watched　stones　rise　up　from　the　earth　and　quarrel　and　mutter　at　one　another。　A　little　girl　found　a　pot　of　jam　and　stuck　her　fist　in　it　and　pulled　out　a　handful　to　lick。　A　grown　man　turned　from　the　scorched　pile　of　fabric　he　had　been　rummaging　through　and　crossed　to　her。　He　seized　the　pot　and　shoved　the　child　aside；　heedless　of　her　angry　shouts。
　　　　　　　No　one　moved　to　interfere。
　　　　　　　I　leaned　forward　and　seized　Chade's　reins　as　he　moved　to　dismount。　I　shouted　wordlessly　at　Sooty；　and　tired　as　she　was；　the　fear　in　my　voice　energized　her。　She　leaped　forward；　and　my　jerk　on　the