rh.theassassinsapprentice-第83部分

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p　of　the　coterie；　and　all　Skilling　as　far　as　I　know。　I　do　not　know　if　he　was　too　afraid　after　that　day；　or　if　the　talent　was　blasted　out　of　him　by　that　force。　He　left　court；　and　went　to　Withywoods；　where　Chivalry　and　Patience　had　once　ruled。　I　believe　he　became　wise。
　　　　　　　Following　her　wedding；　Kettricken　joined　with　all　of　Jhaampe　in　a　month　of　mourning　for　her　brother。　From　my　sickbed；　I　was　aware　of　it　mostly　as　chimes；　chantings；　and　great　burnings　of　incense。　All　Rurisk's　possessions　were　given　away。　To　me　Eyod　himself　came；　and　brought　a　simple　silver　ring　his　son　had　worn。　And　the　head　of　the　arrow　that　had　pierced　his　chest。　He　did　not　say　much　to　me；　except　to　tell　me　what　the　objects　were；　and　that　I　should　cherish　these　reminders　of　an　exceptional　man。　He　left　me　to　wonder　why　these　items　had　been　selected　for　me。
　　　　　　　At　the　end　of　a　month；　Kettricken　set　her　mourning　aside。　She　came　to　bid　Burrich　and　me　a　swift　recovery　and　to　bid　us　farewell　until　she　saw　us　at　Buckkeep。　The　brief　moment　of　Skilling　from　Verity　had　eliminated　all　her　reservations　about　him。　She　spoke　of　her　husband　with　a　quiet　pride　and　went　willingly　to　Buckkeep；　knowing　herself　given　to　an　honorable　man。
　　　　　　　It　was　not　for　me　to　ride　alongside　her　at　the　head　of　that　homeward　procession；　or　to　enter　Buckkeep　preceded　by　horns　and　tumblers　and　children　ringing　bells。　That　was　Regal's　place；　and　he　put　a　gracious　face　on　it。　Regal　appeared　to　take　Verity's　warning　to　heart。　I　do　not　think　Verity　ever　pletely　forgave　him。　But　he　dismissed　Regal's　plottings　as　if　they　were　nasty　boyish　tricks；　and　I　think　that　cowed　Regal　more　than　any　public　reprimand　could　have。　The　poisoning　was　eventually　blamed　on　Rowd　and　Sevrens；　by　those　who　knew　of　it。　Sevrens　had；　after　all；　obtained　the　poison；　and　Rowd　had　delivered　the　gift　of　apple　wine。　Kettricken　pretended　to　be　convinced　that　it　was　a　misplaced　ambition　by　servants　on　behalf　of　an　unknowing　master。　And　Rurisk's　death　was　never　openly　spoken　of　as　a　poisoning。　Nor　did　I　bee　known　as　an　assassin。　Whatever　was　in　Regal's　heart；　his　outward　demeanor　was　that　of　a　younger　prince　graciously　escorting　his　brother's　bride　home。
　　　　　　　I　had　a　long　convalescence。　Jonqui　treated　me　with　herbs　she　said　would　rebuild　what　had　been　damaged。　I　should　have　tried　to　learn　her　herbs　and　techniques；　but　my　mind　could　not　seem　to　hold　things　any　better　than　my　hands　could。　I　actually　remember　little　of　that　time。　My　recovery　from　the　poisoning　was　frustratingly　slow。　Jonqui　sought　to　make　it　less　tedious　by　arranging　time　for　me　in　the　Great　Library；　but　my　eyes　wearied　quickly　and　seemed　as　prone　to　trembling　disorders　as　my　hands。　I　spent　most　days　lying　in　my　bed；　thinking。　For　a　time　I　wondered　if　I　wanted　to　return　to　Buckkeep。　I　wondered　if　I　could　still　be　Shrewd's　assassin。　I　knew　if　I　returned；　I　would　have　to　sit　down　table　from　Regal；　and　look　up；　to　see　him　at　my　king's　left　hand。　I　would　have　to　treat　him　as　if　he　had　never　tried　to　kill　me；　nor　used　me　in　the　poisoning　of　a　man　I　had　admired。　I　spoke　of　it　frankly　one　evening　to　Burrich。　He　sat　and　listened　quietly。　Then　he　said；　〃I　cannot　imagine　it　will　be　easier　for　Kettricken　than　it　would　be　for　you。　Nor　for　me；　to　look　at　a　man　who　has　tried　to　kill　me　twice；　and　call　him　'my　prince。'　You　must　decide。　I　should　hate　to　have　him　think　he　had　frightened　us　away。　But　if　you　decide　we　are　going　elsewhere；　then　we　shall。〃　I　think　I　finally　guessed　then　what　the　earring　signified。
　　　　　　　Winter　was　no　longer　a　threat；　but　a　reality；　when　we　left　the　mountains。　Burrich；　Hands；　and　I　returned　much　later　to　Buckkeep　than　the　others；　for　we　took　our　time　on　the　journey。　I　tired　easily；　and　my　strength　was　still　very　unpredictable。　I　would　crumple　at　odd　moments；　falling　from　the　saddle　like　a　sack　of　grain。　Then　they　would　stop　to　help　me　remount；　and　I　would　force　myself　to　go　on。　Many　nights　I　awoke　shaking；　without　even　the　strength　to　call　out。　These　lapses　were　slow　to　pass。　Worst；　I　think；　were　the　nights　when　I　could　not　waken；　but　dreamed　only　of　endlessly　drowning。　From　one　such　dream　I　woke　to　Verity　standing　over　me。
　　　　　　　You're　enough　to　wake　the　dead；　he　told　me　genially。　We　must　find　a　master　for　you；　to　teach　you　some　control；　if　nothing　else。　Kettricken　finds　it　a　bit　peculiar　that　I　dream　so　often　of　drowning。　I　suppose　I　should　be　grateful　you　slept　well　on　my　wedding　night　at　least。
　　　　　　　〃Verity？〃　I　said　groggily。
　　　　　　　Go　back　to　sleep；　he　told　me。　Galen　is　dead；　and　I've　put　Regal　on　a　shorter　leash。　You've　nothing　to　fear。　Go　to　sleep；　and　stop　dreaming　so　loud。
　　　　　　　Verity；　wait！　But　my　act　of　groping　after　him　broke　the　tenuous　Skill　contact；　and　I　had　no　choice　but　to　do　as　he　had　advised。
　　　　　　　We　traveled　on；　through　increasingly　unpleasant　weather。　We　all　looked　forward　to　getting　home　long　before　we　arrived　there。　Burrich　had；　I　believe；　overlooked　Hands's　abilities　until　that　trip。　Hands　had　a　quiet　petence　that　inspired　trust　in　horses　as　well　as　dogs。　Eventually　he　easily　replaced　both　Cob　and　me　in　the　Buckkeep　stables；　and　the　friendship　that　grew　between　Burrich　and　him　caused　me　to　be　more　aware　of　my　aloneness　than　I　care　to　admit。
　　　　　　　Galen's　death　was　considered　a　tragic　thing　at　Buckkeep　court。　Those　who　had　known　him　least　spoke　most　kindly　about　him。　Obviously　the　man　had　overstrained　himself；　for　his　heart　to　fail　him　so　young。　There　was　some　talk　of　naming　a　warship　after　him；　as　if　he　were　a　fallen　hero；　but　Verity　never　recognized　the　idea　and　it　never　came　to　pass。　His　body　was　sent　back　to　Farrow　for　burial；　with　all　honors。　If　Shrewd　suspected　anything　of　what　had　gone　on　between　Verity　and　Galen；　he　kept　it　well　hidden。　Neither　he　nor　even　Chade　ever　mentioned　it　to　me。　The　loss　of　our　Skillmaster；　with　not　even　an　apprentice　to　replace　him；　was　no　trivial　thing；　especially　with　the　Red…Ships　on　our　horizons。　That　was　what　was　openly　discussed；　but　Verity　flatly　refused　to　consider　Serene　or　any　of　the　others　Galen　had　trained。
　　　　　　　I　never　found　out　if　Shrewd　had　given　me　over　to　Regal。　I　never　asked　him；　nor　even　mentioned　my　suspicions　to　Chade。　I　suppose　I　didn't　want　to　know。　I　tried　not　to　let　it　affect　my　loyalties。　But　in　my　heart；　when　I　said　〃my　king；〃　I　meant　Verity。
　　　　　　　The　timbers　Rurisk　had　promised　came　to　Buckkeep。　They　had　to　be　dragged　overland　to　the　Vin　River；　before　they　could　be　rafted　down　to　Turlake；　and　thence　down　the　Buckriver　to　Buckkeep。　They　arrived　by　midwinter　and　were　all　Rurisk　had　said　they　would　be。　The　first　pleted　warship　was　named　after　him。　I　think　he　would　have　understood　that；　but　not　quite　approved　of　it。
　　　　　　　King　Shrewd's　plan　had　succeeded。　It　had　been　many　years　since　Buckkeep　had　had　a　queen　of　any　kind；　and　Kettricken's　arrival　stirred　interest　in　court　life。　The　tragic　death　of　her　brother　on　her　wedding　eve；　and　the　brave　way　she　had　continued　despite　it　captured　the　imagination　of　the　people。　Her　unmistakable　admiration　for　her　new　husband　made　Verity　a　romantic　hero　even　to　his　own　folk。　They　were　a　striking　couple；　with　her　youth　and　pale　beauty　setting　off　Verity's　quiet　strength。　Shrewd　displayed　them　at　balls　that　attracted　every　minor　noble　from　every　Duchy；　and　Kettricken　spoke　with　intense　eloquence　of　the　need　for　all　to　band　together　to　defeat　the　Red…Ship　Raiders。　So　Shrewd　raised　his　monies；　and　even　in　the　storms　of　winter；　the　fortification　of　the　Six　Duchies　began。　More　towers　were　constructed；　and　folk　volunteered　to　man　them。　Shipwrights　vied　for　the　honor　of　working　on　the　warships；　and　Buckkeep　Town　was　swollen　with　volunteers　to　man　the　ships。　For　a　brief　time　that　winter；　folk　believed　in　the　legends　they　created；　and　it　seemed　the　Red…Ships　could　be　defeated　by　sheer　will　alone。　I　mistrusted　that　mood；　but　watched　as　Shrewd　promoted　it；　and　wondered　how　he　would　sustain　it　when　the　realities　of　the　Forgings　began　again。
　　　　　　　Of　one　other　I　must　speak；　one　dragged　into　that　conflict　and　intrigue　only　by　his　loyalty　to　me。　To　the　end　of　my　days；　I　will　bear　the　scars　he　gave　me。　His　worn　teeth　sank　deeply　into　my　hand　several　times　before　he　managed　to　drag　me　from　that　pool。　How　he　did　it；　I　will　never　know。　But　his　head　still　rested　on　my　chest　when　they　found　us；　his　mortal　bonds　to　this　world　had　broken。　Nosy　was　dead。　I　believe　he　gave　his　life　freely；　recalling　that　we　had　been　good　to　one　another　when　we　were　puppies。　Men　cannot　grieve　as　dogs　do。　But　we　grieve　for　many　years。
　　　　　　　　
　　　　　　　EPILOGUE
　　　　　　　〃YOU　ARE　WEARIED；〃　my　boy　says。　He　is　standing　at　my　elbow　and　I　do　not　know　how　long　he　has　been　there。　He　reaches　forward　slowly；　to　lift　the　pen　from　my　lax　grip。　Wearily　I　regard　the　faltering　trail　of　ink　it　has　tracked　down　my　page。　I　have　seen　that　shape　before；　I　think；　but　it　was　not　ink　then。　A　trickle　of　drying　blood　on　the　deck　of　a　Red…Ship；　and　mine　the　hand　that　spilled　it？　Or　was　it　a　tendril　of　smoke　rising　black　against　a　blue　sky　as　I　rode　too　late　to　warn　a　village　of　a　Red…Ship　raid？　Or　poison　swirling　and　unfurling　yellowly　in　a　simple　glass　of　water；　poison　I　had　handed　someone；　smiling　all　the　while？　The　artless　curl　of　a　strand　of　woman's　hair　left　upon　my　pillow？　Or　the　trail　a　man's　heels　left　in　the　sand　as　we　dragged　the　bodies　from　the　smoldering　tower　at　Sealbay？　The　track　of　a　tear　down　a　mother's　cheek　as　she　clutched　her　Forged　infant　to　her　despite　his　angry　cries？　Like　Red…Ships；　the　memories　e　without　warning；　without　mercy。　〃You　should　rest；〃　the　boy　says　again；　and　I　realize　I　am　sitting；　staring　at　a　line　of　ink　on　a　page。　It　makes　no　sense。　Here　is　another　sheet　spoiled；　another　effort　to　set　aside。
　　　　　　　〃Put　them　away；〃　I　tell　him；　and　do　not　object　as　he　gathers　all　the　sheets　and　stacks　them　haphazardly　together。　Herbary　and　history；　maps　and　musings；　all　a　hodgepodge　in　his　hands　as　they　are　in　my　mind。　I　can　no　longer　recall　what　it　was　I　set　out　to　do。　The　pain　is　back；　and　it　would　be　so　easy　to　quiet　it。　But　that　way　lies　madness；　as　has　been　proven　so　many　times　before　me。　So　instead　I　send　the　boy　to　find　two　leaves　of　carryme；　and　ginger　root　and　peppermint　to　make　a　tea　for　me。　I　wonder　if　one　day　I　will　ask　him　to　fetch　three　leaves　of　that