rz.thehandofoberon-第24部分

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　〃What　does　it　fit？〃
　〃I　was　only　a　small…town　GP　in　simpler　times　than　these；　and　I　never　had　much　to　do　with　psychiatric　cases。　But　I　do　know　that　you　don't　give　a　person　electroshock　therapy　to　restore　memories。　EST　generally　does　just　the　opposite。　It　destroys　some　of　the　short…term　ones。　My　suspicions　began　to　stir　when　I　learned　that　that　was　what　Brand　had　had　done　to　me。　So　I　came　up　with　my　own　hypothesis。　The　auto　wreck　did　not　restore　my　memories；　and　neither　did　the　EST。　I　had　finally　begun　recovering　them　naturally；　not　as　the　result　of　any　particular　trauma。　I　must　have　done　something　or　said　something　to　indicate　that　this　was　occurring。　Word　of　it　somehow　got　to　Brand　and　he　decided　that　this　would　not　be　a　good　thing　to　have　happen　at　that　time。　So　he　journeyed　to　my　shadow　and　managed　to　get　me　mitted　and　subjected　to　treatment　which　he　hoped　would　wipe　out　those　things　I　had　recently　recovered。　This　was　just　partly　successful；　in　that　its　only　lasting　effect　was　to　fuzz　me　up　for　the　few　days　surrounding　the　sessions。　The　accident　may　have　contributed；　too。　But　when　I　escaped　from　Porter　and　lived　through　his　attempt　to　kill　me；　the　process　of　recovery　continued　after　I　regained　consciousness　in　Greenwood　and　left　the　place。　I　was　remembering　more　and　more　when　I　was　staying　at　Flora's。　The　recovery　was　accelerated　by　Random's　taking　me　to　Rebma；　where　I　walked　the　Pattern。　If　this　had　not　occurred；　however；　I　am　convinced　now　that　it　would　all　have　e　back；　anyway。　It　might　have　taken　somewhat　longer；　but　I　had　broken　through　and　the　remembering　was　an　ongoing　process；　ing　faster　and　faster　near　the　end。　So　I　concluded　that　Brand　was　trying　to　sabotage　me；　and　that　is　what　fits　the　things　you　just　told　me。〃
　The　band　of　stars　had　narrowed；　and　it　finally　vanished　above　us。　We　advanced　through　what　seemed　a　totally　black　tunnel　now；　with　perhaps　the　tiniest　flickering　of　light　a　great　distance　ahead　of　us。
　〃Yes；〃　she　said　in　the　darkness　before　me；　〃you　guessed　correctly。　Brand　was　afraid　of　you。　He　claimed　he　had　seen　your　return　one　night　in　Tir…na　Nog'th；　to　the　undoing　of　all　our　plans。　I　paid　him　no　heed　at　the　time；　for　I　was　not　even　aware　you　still　lived。　It　must　have　been　then　that　he　set　out　to　find　you。　Whether　he　divined　your　whereabouts　by　some　arcane　means　or　simply　saw　it　in　Eric's　mind；　I　do　not　know。　Probably　the　latter。　He　is　occasionally　capable　of　such　a　feat。　However　he　located　you；　you　now　know　the　rest。〃
　〃It　was　Flora's　presence　in　that　place　and　her　strange　liaison　with　Eric　that　first　made　him　suspicious。　Or　so　he　said。　Not　that　it　matters；　now。　What　do　you　propose　doing　with　him　if　we　get　our　hands　on　him？〃
　She　chuckled。
　〃You　are　wearing　your　blade；〃　she　said。
　〃Brand　told　me；　not　all　that　long　ago；　that　Bleys　is　still　alive。　Is　this　true？〃
　〃Yes。〃
　〃Then　why　am　I　here；　rather　than　Bleys？〃
　〃Bleys　is　not　attuned　to　the　Jewel。　You　are。　You　interact　with　it　at　near　distances；　and　it　will　attempt　to　preserve　your　life　if　you　are　in　imminent　danger　of　losing　it。　The　risk；　therefore；　is　not　as　great；〃　she　said。
　Then；　moments　later；　〃Don't　take　it　for　granted；　though。　A　swift　stroke　can　still　beat　its　reaction。　You　can　die　in　its　presence。〃
　The　light　ahead　grew　larger；　brighter；　but　there　were　no　drafts；　sounds；　or　smells　from　that　direction。　Advancing；　I　thought　of　the　layers　upon　layers　of　explanations　I　had　received　since　my　return；　each　with　its　own　plex　of　motivations；　justifications　for　what　had　happened　while　I　was　away；　for　what　had　happened　since；　for　what　was　happening　now。　The　emotions；　the　plans；　the　feelings；　the　objectives　I　had　seen　swirled　like　floodwater　through　the　city　of　facts　I　was　slowly　erecting　on　the　grave　of　my　other　self；　and　though　an　act　is　an　act；　in　the　best　Steinian　tradition；　each　wave　of　interpretation　that　broke　upon　me　shifted　the　position　of　one　or　more　things　I　had　thought　safely　anchored；　and　by　this　brought　about　an　alteration　of　the　whole；　to　the　extent　that　all　of　life　seemed　almost　a　shifting　interplay　of　Shadow　about　the　Amber　of　some　never　to　be　attained　truth。　Still；　I　could　not　deny　that　I　knew　more　now　than　I　had　several　years　earlier；　that　I　was　closer　to　the　heart　of　matters　than　I　had　been　before；　that　the　entire　action　in　which　I　had　been　caught　up　upon　my　return　seemed　now　to　be　sweeping　toward　some　final　resolution。　And　what　did　I　want？　A　chance　to　find　out　what　was　right　and　a　chance　to　act　on　it！　I　laughed。　Who　is　ever　granted　the　first；　let　alone　the　second　of　these？　A　workable　appromixation　of　truth；　then。　That　would　be　enough。。。　And　a　chance　to　swing　my　blade　a　few　times　in　the　right　direction：　The　highest　pensation　I　could　receive　from　a　one　o'clock　world　for　the　changes　wrought　since　noon。　I　laughed　again　and　made　sure　my　blade　was　loose　in　the　sheath。
　〃Brand　said　that　Bleys　had　raised　another　army　…〃　I　began。
　〃Later；〃　she　said；　〃later。　There　is　no　more　time。〃
　And　she　was　right。　The　light　had　grown　large；　bee　a　circular　opening。　It　had　approached　at　a　rate　out　of　proportion　to　our　advance；　as　though　the　tunnel　itself　were　contracting。　It　seemed　to　be　daylight　that　was　rushing　in　through　what　I　chose　to　regard　as　the　cave　mouth。
　〃All　right；〃　I　said；　and　moments　later　we　reached　the　opening　and　passed　through　it。
　I　blinked　my　eyes　as　we　emerged。　To　my　left　was　the　sea；　which　seemed　to　merge　with　the　same…colored　sky。　The　golden　sun　which　floated/hung　above/within　it；　bounced　beams　of　brilliance　from　all　directions。　Behind　me；　now；　there　was　nothing　but　rock。　Our　passage　to　this　place　had　vanished　without　a　sign。　Not　too　far　below　and　before　me　…　perhaps　a　hundred　feet　distant　…　lay　the　primal　Pattern。　A　figure　was　negotiating　the　second　of　its　outer　arcs；　his　attention　so　confined　by　this　activity　that　he　had　apparently　not　yet　noted　our　presence。　A　flash　of　red　as　he　took　a　turn：　the　Jewel；　hanging　now　from　his　neck　as　it　had　hung　from　mine；　from　Eric's；　from　Dad's。　The　figure；　of　course；　was　Brand's。
　I　dismounted。　I　looked　up　at　Fiona；　small　and　distraught；　and　I　placed　Drum's　reins　in　her　hand。
　〃Any　advice；　other　than　to　go　after　him？〃　I　whispered。
　She　shook　her　head。
　Turning　then；　I　drew　Grayswandir　and　strode　forward。
　〃Good　luck；〃　she　said　softly。
　As　I　walked　toward　the　Pattern；　I　saw　the　long　chain　leading　from　the　cave　mouth　to　the　now　still　form　of　the　griffin　Wixer。　Wixer's　head　lay　on　the　ground　several　paces　to　the　left　of　his　body。　Body　and　head　both　leaked　a　normal…colored　blood　upon　the　stone。
　As　I　approached　the　beginning　of　the　Pattern；　I　did　a　quick　calculation。　Brand　had　already　taken　several　turns　about　the　general　spiral　of　the　design。　He　was　approximately　two　and　a　half　laps　into　it。　If　we　were　only　separated　by　one　winding；　I　could　reach　him　with　my　blade　once　I　achieved　a　position　paralleling　his　own。　The　going；　however；　got　rougher　the　further　one　penetrated　the　design。　Consequently；　Brand　was　moving　at　a　steadily　decreasing　pace。　So　it　would　be　close。　I　did　not　have　to　catch　him。　I　just　had　to　pick　up　a　lap　and　a　half　and　obtain　a　position　across　from　him。
　I　placed　my　foot　upon　the　Pattern　and　moved　forward；　as　fast　as　I　was　able。　The　blue　sparks　began　about　my　feet　as　I　rushed　through　the　first　curve　against　the　rising　resistance。　The　sparks　grew　quickly。　My　hair　was　beginning　to　rise　when　I　hit　the　First　Veil；　and　the　crackling　of　the　sparks　was　quite　audible　now。　I　pushed　on　against　the　pressure　of　the　Veil；　wondering　whether　Brand　had　noticed　me　yet；　unable　to　afford　the　distraction　of　a　glance　in　his　direction　just　then。　I　met　the　resistance　with　increased　force；　and　several　steps　later　I　was　through　the　Veil　and　moving　more　easily　again。
　I　looked　up。　Brand　was　just　emerging　from　the　terrible　Second　Veil；　blue　sparks　as　high　as　his　waist。　He　was　grinning　a　grin　of　resolve　and　triumph　as　he　pulled　free　and　took　a　clear　step　forward。　Then　he　saw　me。
　The　grin　went　away　and　he　hesitated；　a　point　in　my　favor。　You　never　stop　on　the　Pattern　if　you　can　help　it。　If　you　do；　it　costs　a　lot　of　extra　energy　to　get　moving　again。
　〃You　are　too　late！〃　he　called　out。
　I　did　not　answer　him。　I　just　kept　going。　Blue　fires　fell　from　the　Pattern　tracery　along　Grayswandir's　length。
　〃You　will　not　make　it　through　the　black；〃　he　said。
　I　kept　going。　The　dark　area　was　just　ahead　of　me　now。　I　was　glad　that　it　had　not　occurred　over　one　of　the　more　difficult　portions　of　the　Pattern　this　time　around。　Brand　moved　forward　and　slowly　began　his　movement　toward　the　Grand　Curve。　If　I　could　catch　him　there；　it　would　be　no　contest。　He　would　not　have　the　strength　or　the　speed　to　defend　himself。
　As　I　approached　the　damaged　portion　of　the　Pattern；　I　recalled　the　means　by　which　Ganelon　and　I　had　cut　the　black　road　on　our　flight　from　Avalon。　I　had　succeeded　in　breaking　the　power　of　the　road　by　holding　the　image　of　the　Pattern　in　my　mind　as　we　had　gone　across。　Now；　of　course；　I　had　the　Pattern　itself　all　around　me；　and　the　distance　was　not　nearly　so　great。　While　my　first　thought　had　been　that　Brand　was　simply　trying　to　rattle　me　with　his　threat；　it　occurred　to　me　that　the　force　of　the　dark　place　might　well　be　much　stronger　here　at　its　source。　As　I　came　up　to　it；　Grayswandir　blazed　with　a　sudden　intensity　which　outshone　its　previous　light。　On　an　impulse；　I　touched　its　point　to　the　edge　of　the　blackness；　at　the　place　where　the　Pattern　ended。
　Grayswandir　clove　to　the　blackness　and　could　not　be　raised　above　it。　I　continued　forward；　and　my　blade　sliced　the　area　before　me；　sliding　ahead　in　what　seemed　an　approximation　of　the　original　tracery。　I　followed。　The　sun　seemed　to　darken　as　I　trod　the　dark　ground。　I　was　suddenly　conscious　of　my　heartbeat；　and　perspiration　formed　on　my　brow。　A　grayish　cast　fell　over　everything。　The　world　seemed　to　dim；　the　Pattern　to　fade。　It　seemed　it　would　be　easy　to　step　amiss　in　this　place；　and　I　was　not　certain　whether　the　result　would　be　the　same　as　a　misstep　within　the　intact　portions　of　the　Pattern。　I　did　not　want　to　find　out。
　I　kept　my　eyes　low；　following　the　line　Grayswandir　was　inscribing　before　me；　the　blade's　blue　fire　now　the　only　thing　of　color　left　to　the　world。　Right　foot；　left　foot。。。
　Then　suddenly　I　was　out　of　it　and　Grayswandir　s