tp.guards!guards!-第36部分

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　which　is　more　plicated　than　at　home；　and　now　I　am　on　Day　duty　as　well。　This　is　a　shame　because；　I　was　going　to　watch　the　Coronation　with　Reel；　but　it　does　not　do　to　plain。　I　must　go　now　because　we　are　expecting　a　dragon　any　minute　although　it　does　not　exist　really。　Your　loving　son；　Carrot。　PS。　Have　you　seen　anything　of　Minty　lately？
　　
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　〃You　idiot！〃
　〃Sorry；〃　said　Vimes。　〃Sorry。〃
　People　were　climbing　back　into　their　seats；　many　of　them　giving　him　furious　looks。　Wonse　was　white　with　fury。
　〃How　could　you　have　been　so　stupid？　〃　he　raged。
　Vimes　stared　at　his　own　fingers。
　〃I　thought　I　saw。。。〃　he　began。
　〃It　was　a　raven！　You　know　what　ravens　are？　There　must　be　hundreds　of　them　in　the　city！〃
　〃In　the　fog；　you　see；　the　size　wasn't　easy　to。。。〃　Vimes　mumbled。
　〃And　poor　Master　Greetling；　you　ought　to　have　known　what　loud　noises　do　to　him！〃　The　head　of　the　Teachers'　Guild　had　to　be　led　away　by　some　kind　people。
　〃Shouting　out　like　that！〃　Wonse　went　on。
　〃Look；　I　said　I'm　sorry！　It　was　an　honest　mistake！〃
　〃I've　had　to　hold　up　the　procession　and　everything！〃
　Vimes　said　nothing。　He　could　feel　hundreds　of　amused　or　unsympathetic　eyes　on　him。
　〃Well；〃　he　muttered；　〃I'd　better　be　getting　back　to　the　Yard。。。〃
　Wonse's　eyes　narrowed。　〃No；〃　he　snapped。　〃But　you　can　go　home；　if　you　like。　Or　anywhere　your　fancies　take　you。　Give　me　your　badge。〃
　〃Huh？〃
　Wonse　held　out　his　hand。
　〃Your　badge；〃　he　repeated。
　〃My　badge？〃
　〃That's　what　I　said。　I　want　to　keep　you　out　of　trouble。〃
　Vimes　looked　at　him　in　astonishment。　〃But　it's　my　badge！〃
　〃And　you're　going　to　give　it　to　me；〃　said　Wonse　grimly。　〃By　order　of　the　king。〃
　〃What　d'you　mean？　He　doesn't　even　know！〃　Vimes　heard　the　wailing　in　his　own　voice。
　Wonse　scowled。　〃But　he　will；〃　he　said。　〃And　I　don't　expect　he'll　even　bother　to　appoint　a　successor。〃
　Vimes　slowly　undipped　the　verdigrised　disc　of　copper；　weighed　it　in　his　hand；　and　then　tossed　it　to　Wonse　without　a　word。
　For　a　moment　he　considered　pleading；　but　something　rebelled。　He　turned；　and　stalked　off　through　the　crowd。
　So　that　was　it。
　As　simple　as　that。　After　half　a　lifetime　of　service。　No　more　City　Watch。　Huh。　Vimes　kicked　at　the　pavement。　It'd　be　some　sort　of　Royal　Guard　now。
　With　plumes　in　their　damn　helmets。
　Well；　he'd　had　enough。　It　wasn't　a　proper　life　anyway；　in　the　Watch。　You　didn't　meet　people　in　the　best　of　circumstances。　There　must　be　hundreds　of　other　things　he　could　do；　and　if　he　thought　for　long　enough　he　could　probably　remember　what　some　of　them　were。
　Pseudopolis　Yard　was　off　the　route　of　the　procession；　and　as　he　stumbled　into　the　Watch　House　he　could　hear　the　distant　cheering　beyond　the　rooftops。　Across　the　city　the　temple　gongs　were　being　sounded。
　Now　they　are　ringing　the　gongs；　thought　Vimes；　but　soon　they　will…they　will…they　will　not　be　ringing　the　gongs。　Not　much　of　an　aphorism；　he　thought；　but　he　could　work　on　it。　He　had　the　time；　now。
　Vimes　noticed　the　mess。
　Errol　had　started　eating　again。　He'd　eaten　most　of　the　table；　the　grate；　the　coal　scuttle；　several　lamps　and　the　squeaky　rubber　hippo。　Now　he　lay　in　his　box　again；　skin　twitching；　whimpering　in　his　sleep。
　〃A　right　mess　you've　made；〃　said　Vimes　enigmatically。　Still；　at　least　he　wouldn't　have　to　tidy　it　up。
　He　opened　his　desk　drawer。
　Someone　had　eaten　into　that；　too。　All　that　was　left　was　a　few　shards　of　glass。
　　
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　Sergeant　Colon　hauled　himself　on　to　the　parapet　around　the　Temple　of　Small　Gods。　He　was　too　old　for　this　sort　of　thing。　He'd　joined　for　the　bell　ringing；　not　sitting　around　on　high　places　waiting　for　dragons　to　find　him。
　He　got　his　breath　back；　and　peered　through　the　fog。
　〃Anyone　human　still　up　here？〃　he　whispered。
　Carrot's　voice　sounded　dead　and　featureless　in　the　dull　air。
　〃Here　I　am；　Sergeant；〃　he　said。
　〃I　was　just　checking　if　you　were　still　here；〃　said　Colon。
　〃I'm　still　here；　Sergeant；〃　said　Carrot；　obediently。
　Colon　joined　him。
　〃Just　checking　you　were　not　et；〃　he　said；　trying　to　grin。
　〃I　haven't　been　et；〃　said　Carrot。
　〃Oh；〃　said　Colon。　〃Good；　then。〃　He　tapped　his　fingers　on　the　damp　stonework；　feeling　he　ought　to　make　his　position　absolutely　clear。
　〃Just　checking；〃　he　repeated。　〃Part　of　my　duty；　see。　Going　around；　sort　of　thing。　It's　not　that　I'm　frightened　of　being　up　on　the　roofs　by　myself；　you　understand。　Thick　up　here；　isn't　it。〃
　〃Yes；　Sergeant。〃
　〃Everything　all　okay？〃　Nobby's　muffled　voice　sidled　its　way　through　the　thick　air；　quickly　followed　by　its　owner。
　〃Yes；　Corporal；〃　said　Carrot。
　〃What　you　doing　up　here？〃　Colon　demanded。
　〃I　was　just　ing　up　to　check　Lance…constable　Carrot　was　all　right；〃　said　Nobby　innocently。　〃What　were　you　doing；　Sergeant？〃
　〃We're　all　right；〃　said　Carrot；　beaming。　〃That's　good；　isn't　it。〃
　The　two　NCOs　shifted　uneasily　and　avoided　looking　at　one　another。　It　seemed　like　a　long　way　back　to　their　posts；　across　the　damp；　cloudy　and；　above　all；　exposed　rooftops。
　Colon　made　an　executive　decision。
　〃Sod　this；〃　he　said；　and　found　a　piece　of　fallen　statuary　to　sit　on。　Nobby　leaned　on　the　parapet　and　winkled　a　damp　dog…end　from　the　unspeakable　ashtray　behind　his　ear。
　〃Heard　the　procession　go　by；〃　he　observed。　Colon　filled　his　pipe；　and　struck　a　match　on　the　stone　beside　him。
　〃If　that　dragon's　alive；〃　he　said；　blowing　out　a　plume　of　smoke　and　turning　a　small　patch　of　fog　into　smog；　〃then　it'll　have　got　the　hell　away　from　here；　I'm　telling　you。　Not　the　right　sort　of　place　for　dragons；　a　city；〃　he　added；　in　the　tones　of　someone　doing　a　great　job　of　convincing　himself。　〃It'll　have　gone　off　to　somewhere　where　there's　high　places　and　plenty　to　eat；　you　mark　my　words。〃
　〃Somewhere　like　the　city；　you　mean？〃　said　Carrot。
　〃Shut　up；〃　said　the　other　two　in　unison。
　〃Chuck　us　the　matches；　Sergeant；〃　said　Nobby。
　Colon　tossed　the　bundle　of　evil　yellow…headed　lucifers　across　the　leads。　Nobby　struck　one；　which　was　immediately　blown　out。　Shreds　of　fog　drifted　past　him。
　〃Wind's　getting　up；〃　he　observed。
　〃Good。　Can't　stand　this　fog；〃　said　Colon。　〃What　was　I　saying？〃
　〃You　were　saying　the　dragon'll　be　miles　away；〃　prompted　Nobby。
　〃Oh。　Right。　Well；　it　stands　to　reason；　doesn't　it？　I　mean；　I　wouldn't　hang　around　here　if　I　could　fly　away。　If　I　could　fly；　I　wouldn't　be　sitting　on　a　roof　on　some　manky　old　statue。　If　I　could　fly；　I'd。。。〃
　〃What　statue？〃　said　Nobby；　cigarette　halfway　to　his　mouth。
　〃This　one；〃　said　Colon；　thumping　the　stone。　〃And　don't　try　to　give　me　the　willies；　Nobby。　You　know　there's　hundreds　of　mouldy　old　statues　up　on　Small　Gods。〃
　〃No　I　don't；〃　said　Nobby。　〃What　I　do　know　is；　they　were　all　taken　down　last　month　when　they　re…leaded　the　roof。　There's　just　the　roof　and　the　dome　and　that's　it。　You　have　to　take　notice　of　little　things　like　that；〃　he　added；　〃when　you're　detectoring。〃
　In　the　damp　silence　that　followed　Sergeant　Colon　looked　down　at　the　stone　he　was　sitting　on。　It　had　a　taper；　and　a　scaly　pattern；　and　a　sort　of　indefinable　tail…like　quality。　Then　he　followed　its　length　up　and　into　the　rapidly…thinning　fog。
　On　the　dome　of　Small　Gods　the　dragon　raised　its　head；　yawned；　and　unfolded　its　wings。
　The　unfolding　wasn't　a　simple　operation。　It　seemed　to　go　on　for　some　time；　as　the　plex　biological　machinery　of　ribs　and　pleats　slid　apart。　Then；　with　wings　outstretched；　the　dragon　yawned；　took　a　few　steps　to　the　edge　of　the　roof；　and　launched　itself　into　the　air。
　After　a　while　a　hand　appeared　over　the　edge　of　the　parapet。　It　flailed　around　for　a　moment　until　it　got　a　decent　grip。
　There　was　a　grunt。　Carrot　hauled　himself　back　on　to　the　roof　and　pulled　the　other　two　up　behind　him。　They　lay　flat　out　on　the　leads；　panting。　Carrot　observed　the　way　that　the　dragon's　talons　had　scored　deep　grooves　in　the　metal。　You　couldn't　help　noticing　things　like　that。
　〃Hadn't；〃　he　panted；　〃hadn't　we　better　warn　people？〃
　Colon　dragged　himself　forward　until　he　could　look　across　the　city。
　〃I　don't　think　we　need　bother；〃　he　said。　〃I　think　they'll　soon　find　out。〃
　　
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　The　High　Priest　of　Blind　Io　was　stumbling　over　his　words。　There　had　never　been　an　official　coronation　service　in　Ankh…Morpork；　as　far　as　he　could　find　out。　The　old　kings　had　managed　quite　well　with　something　on　the　lines　of：　〃We　hath　got　the　crown；　i'faith；　and　we　will　kill　any　whoreson　who　tries　to　takes　it　away；　by　the　Lord　Harry。〃　Apart　from　anything　else；　this　was　rather　short。　He'd　spent　a　long　time　drafting　something　longer　and　more　in　keeping　with　the　spirit　of　the　times；　and　was　having　some　trouble　remembering　it。
　He　was　also　being　put　off　by　the　goat；　which　was　watching　him　with　loyal　interest。
　〃Get　on　with　it！〃　Wonse　hissed；　from　his　position　behind　the　throne。
　〃All　in　good　time；〃　the　high　priest　hissed　back。　〃This　is　a　coronation；　I'll　have　you　know。　You　might　try　to　show　a　little　respect。〃
　〃Of　course　I'm　showing　respect！　Now　get　on。。。〃
　There　was　a　shout；　off　to　the　right。　Wonse　glared　into　the　crowd。
　〃It's　that　Ramkin　woman；〃　he　said。　〃What's　she　up　to？〃
　People　around　her　were　chattering　excitedly　now。　Fingers　pointed　all　the　same　way；　like　a　small　fallen　forest。　There　were　one　or　two　screams；　and　then　the　crowd　moved　like　a　tide。
　Wonse　looked　along　the　wide　Street　of　Small　Gods。
　It　wasn't　a　raven　out　there。　Not　this　time。
　　
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　The　dragon　flew　slowly；　only　a　few　feet　above　the　ground；　wings　sculling　gracefully　through　the　air。
　The　flags　that　crisscrossed　the　street　were　caught　up　and　snapped　like　so　much　cobweb；　piling　up　on　the　creature's　spine　plates　and　flapping　back　along　the　length　of　its　tail。
　It　flew　with　head　and　neck　fully　extended；　as　if　the　great　body　was　being　towed　like　a　barge。　The　people　on　the　street　yelled　and　fought　one　another　for　the　safety　of　doorways。　It　paid　them　no　attention。
　It　should　have　e　roaring；　but　the　only　sounds　were　the　creaking　of　wings　and　the　snapping　of　banners。
　It　should　have　e　roaring。　Not　like　this；　not　slowly　and　deliberately；　giving　terror　time　to　mature。　It　should　have　e　threatening。　Not　promising。
　It　should　have　e　roaring；　not　flying　gently　to　the　acpaniment　of　the　zip　and　zing　of　merry　bunting。
　　
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　Vimes　pulled　open　the　other　drawer　of　his　desk　an