lh.narcissusinchains-第36部分

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f　against　me　more　tightly。
　I　was　effectively　sandwiched　between　them；　and　it　reminded　me　forcibly　of　waking　up　between　Caleb　and　Micah。　Not　a　forting　memory。　But　the　smell　of　Nathaniel's　skin　was　familiar。　The　vanilla　scent　of　his　hair　where　it　edged　my　face　and　stretched　under　his　body　was　forting。　I　drew　the　scent　of　him　around　me　like　a　blanket；　pulled　my　body　in　as　close　to　the　warm　curve　of　him　as　I　could　go　and　not　e　out　the　other　side；　and　clung。　I　acknowledged　in　my　head；　though　never　aloud；　that　tonight　I　clung。　I　held　him　like　he　was　the　last　solid　thing　in　the　world；　the　way　I'd　wanted　to　hold　Jean…Claude　and　couldn't。
　Jason's　hand　smoothed　along　my　hip；　but　I'd　forced　his　hand　up　from　around　my　waist　when　I　tucked　so　tightly　against　Nathaniel；　there　was　really　nowhere　else　for　it　to　go。　His　hand　was　very　still　against　my　bare　leg；　and　there　was　a　tension　to　him；　as　if　he　was　waiting　for　me　to　protest。　When　I　didn't；　he　relaxed　and　even　moved　his　entire　body　back　against　me。　He'd　managed　to　calm　himself。　Good　for　him。
　Honestly；　it　was　nice　having　Jason's　weight　at　my　back。　Normally；　I　spooned　Nathaniel　　took　the　dominant　position　with　my　body　protecting　his　　my　back　bare　to　the　room。　But　I　wasn't　feeling　particularly　dominant。　I　wanted　someone　to　have　my　back。　And；　if　it　couldn't　be　Jean…Claude；　or　Richard；　Jason　wasn't　a　bad　choice。　For　all　his　teasing；　he　was　my　friend。
　Nathaniel　fell　asleep　first；　he　usually　drifted　off　faster　than　I　did。　Somehow　I　knew　that　Jason　was　still　awake　pressed　against　my　back；　his　hand　on　my　thigh。　I　could　feel　a　tension　in　him　as　I　began　to　drift　off；　and　strangely；　it　was　forting。　Jason　literally　had　my　back。　It　meant　I　could　sleep；　and　between　the　three　of　us；　whatever　came　through　the　door；　we　could　probably　handle　it。　Probably。
　
　15
　
　I　WAS　DREAMING。　Something　confusing　about　bodies　and　running　and　a　ringing　noise　that　made　the　crowd　run　faster。　Ringing　noise？　I　woke　up　enough　to　feel　Nathaniel　move　beside　me。　He　groped　over　the　side　of　the　bed　and　came　up　with　my　cell　phone　from　my　pile　of　clothes。　He　handed　the　ringing　phone　to　me。　〃It's　for　you。〃
　Jason　mumbled；　〃God；　what　time　is　it？〃
　I　flipped　the　phone　open　and　put　it　to　my　ear　before　anyone　answered　his　question。　〃Yeah；　it's　me。〃　I　was　only　half　awake。
　〃Anita？〃
　〃Yes；　who　is　this？〃
　〃It's　Rafael。〃
　That　made　me　sit　up。　Rafael　was　the　wererat　king。　Their　equivalent　of　an　Ulfric。　He　was　also　Richard's　ally。　〃I'm　here；　what's　up？〃
　〃First；　my　condolences。　I　hear　you　may　be　Nimir…Ra　in　truth　next　full　moon。〃
　〃Gee；　news　does　travel　fast；〃　I　said；　trying　not　to　sound　bitter；　but　failing。
　〃Second；　I　know　the　pack　has　one　of　your　leopards；　and　that　you　must　try　and　win　him　back　from　them　tonight。　You　are　allowed　to　bring　allies　with　you；　and　I　would　be　honored　if　you　would　allow　the　wererats　to　acpany　you。〃
　〃I　appreciate　the　gesture；　Rafael；　you　don't　know　how　much　I　appreciate　it；　but　I'm　not　lupa　anymore。　Your　treaty　is　with　the　pack；　and　I'm　not　pack　anymore。〃
　〃True；　but　you　risked　yourself　once　to　save　me　from　torture；　and　possible　death。　I　told　you　then　that　the　wererats　would　not　forget　what　you　had　done　for　us。〃
　〃What　about　your　treaty　with　Richard？〃
　〃It's　with　Richard；　not　the　pack。〃
　〃Showing　up　at　my　back　tonight　is　still　a　conflict　of　interests；　don't　you　think？〃
　〃I　don't　think　so。　I　think　it　will　make　the　point　that　if　Richard　is　no　longer　Ulfric；　the　wererats　will　not　be　the　werewolves'　allies。〃
　〃You'll　show　up　with　me　tonight　to　make　it　clear　that　your　treaty　is　with　Richard　and　not　the　pack？〃
　Jason　sat　up　in　the　bed。
　〃Yes；〃　Rafael　said。
　〃Clever　you。〃
　〃Thank　you。〃
　〃So　you　don't　like　Jacob　either？〃
　Jason　moved　closer　to　me；　as　if　he　could　hear　Rafael's　side　of　the　conversation。　Maybe　he　could。
　〃No；〃　Rafael　said。
　〃Me　either。〃
　〃So　I　will　meet　you　at　your　home　tonight　before　we　drive　to　the　lupanar。〃
　〃Just　you？〃　I　made　it　a　question。
　〃Oh；　no；　we　will　be　there　in　force　so　the　point　is　not　lost　on　Jacob's　supporters。〃
　〃I　like　the　way　you　think；〃　I　said。
　〃I　wish　Richard　did；〃　Rafael　said。
　〃Have　you　tried　to　get　him　to　execute　Jacob；　too？〃　I　asked。
　〃I　knew　you　would　understand　both　the　problem　and　the　needed　solution；　Anita。〃
　〃Oh；　I　understand。　I　just　wish　Richard　did。〃
　〃Yes；〃　Rafael　said；　〃yes。　Jacob　is　not　the　man　Richard　is；　but　he　has　some　qualities　that　I　would　wish　on　Richard　if　I　could。〃
　〃Me　too。〃
　〃I'll　meet　you　tonight　at　your　house　at　full　dark。〃
　〃I'll　be　there。　And　Rafael　。。。　〃
　〃Yes？〃
　〃Thanks。〃
　〃No　thanks　are　necessary。　The　rats　owe　you　a　debt。　We　pay　our　debts。〃
　〃And　it　allows　you　to　make　a　threat　to　Jacob　and　his　supporters　without　doing　anything　that　could　start　a　war；〃　I　said。
　〃As　I　said；　Anita；　you　understand　things　that　Richard　does　not。　Until　tonight。〃
　〃Until　tonight；〃　I　said。　He　hung　up。　I　hung　up；　flipping　the　phone　closed。　Jason　was　practically　leaning　over　my　shoulder。
　〃Did　I　just　hear　that　Rafael　and　the　wererats　are　going　with　you　tonight　to　the　lupanar？〃
　〃You　going　to　tattle　to　Richard？〃　I　asked；　staring　at　his　face　from　inches　away；　his　back　touching　my　shoulder。
　〃No。〃
　My　eyes　widened。
　〃Unless　Richard　specifically　asks；　'Is　Rafael　going　to　be　there　tonight　as　Anita's　ally？'　then　I　don't　have　to　answer。　And　I'm　not　volunteering　the　information。〃
　〃That's　cutting　your　oath　of　obedience　pretty　close；　isn't　it？〃
　〃My　loyalty　is　to　Richard。　And　having　the　rats　with　you　tonight　will　help　Richard；　not　hurt　him。〃
　I　nodded。　〃Sometimes　you　have　to　keep　things　from　Richard　to　help　him。〃
　〃Unfortunately；〃　Jason　said。
　I　handed　the　phone　to　Nathaniel；　who　put　it　back　on　the　floor　with　my　clothes。　I　checked　my　watch。　It　was　ten　o'clock；　we'd　had　a　little　over　six　hours　of　sleep。　Time　to　start　the　day。　Yippee！　It　was　still　hours　before　I　could　expect　Jean…Claude　to　be　awake。
　I　snuggled　down　into　the　covers　on　my　back。　Nathaniel　rolled　onto　his　side；　hand　going　across　my　stomach；　one　leg　entwined　over　my　legs。　His　second　favorite　sleeping　position；　though　one　I　often　had　to　move　him　out　of　before　I　could　go　to　sleep。　But　I　wasn't　sleeping；　I　was　thinking；　so　it　was　okay。
　He　rubbed　his　cheek　against　my　shoulder；　and　a　small　movement　of　his　lower　body　pressed　him　against　me。　He　was　hard　and　firm　under　the　silky　shorts。　It　was　morning；　he　was　male；　it　was　normal。　Normally；　I　could　ignore　it；　just　one　of　those　things　that　you　pretended　didn't　happen；　but　today　。。。　Today　the　feel　of　him　pressed　against　me　made　things　low　in　my　body　clench　tight。　The　need　rode　through　my　body　like　fire　spilling　through　me；　over　me；　inside　me。
　Nathaniel　went　very　still　beside　me。
　Jason　was　sitting　up；　rubbing　his　bare　arms。　〃What　was　that？〃
　I　tried　not　to　move；　not　to　breathe；　to　just　be　as　still　as　Nathaniel。　I　tried　to　think　of　something　besides　the　warmth　of　his　body　pressed　against　the　length　of　mine。　Tried　not　to　feel　the　press　of　him　hard　and　ready　through　the　satin　of　the　jogging　shorts。　I　grabbed　the　sheet　and　jerked　it　off　of　us　in　one　violent　movement。　I　gazed　down　the　length　of　his　body；　of　our　bodies；　pressed　together。　The　shorts　clung　like　a　second　skin　to　the　back　of　him。　The　ardeur　rushed　through　me　again　like　a　new　pulse　I'd　never　felt　before；　and　my　beast　rose　up　through　the　depths　with　it。　It　was　as　if　they　were　tied　together。　I　hungered；　and　my　beast　woke；　rolling　inside　me　like　a　lazy　cat；　stretching；　eyeing　the　mouse。　Except　what　this　cat　wanted　to　do　to　the　mouse　was　not　only　against　the　laws　of　nature；　but　physically　impossible。　The　trouble　was　this　mouse　smelled　of　vanilla　and　fur；　and　he　was　warm　and　full　against　me。　I　wanted　to　roll　him　over　on　his　back　and　tear　off　the　shorts　and　see　what　I　was　feeling。　I　wanted　to　lick　down　his　chest；　down　his　stomach；　and　。。。　The　visual　was　so　strong　that　I　had　to　close　my　eyes　against　the　sight　of　him　lying　there。　But　sight　wasn't　my　only　problem。　The　smell　of　his　skin　was　suddenly　overwhelming；　sweet。　And　I　had　a　desire　to　roll　my　body　on　top　of　his；　not　for　sex　exactly；　but　to　paint　his　scent　on　my　body；　to　wear　it　like　a　dress。
　〃Anita；〃　it　was　Jason。　〃What's　happening？〃
　I　opened　my　eyes　to　find　him　bending　over　me；　propped　on　one　elbow；　and　the　ardeur　widened　to　include　him。　It　did　not　discriminate。　I　touched　his　face；　ran　my　fingers　down　the　edge　of　his　cheek；　traced　the　fullness　of　his　lower　lip　with　my　thumb。
　He　moved　his　mouth　back　just　enough　to　speak。　〃Jean…Claude　said　you'd　inherited　his　need；　his　incubus。　I　don't　think　I　believed　him　。。。　〃　My　hand　traced　down　his　face；　his　neck；　his　chest。　〃　。。。　until　now；〃　he　whispered。
　My　hand　stopped　over　his　heart。　It　beat　against　my　hand；　and　I　could　suddenly　feel　my　pulse　in　my　palm　beating　against　his　skin；　as　if　my　heart　had　spilled　down　my　arm　to　cup　against　his　body。
　〃Ask　me　why　Jean…Claude　insisted　I　stay　in　here　today。〃
　I　just　looked　at　him。　I　couldn't　think；　couldn't　speak。　I　could　feel　his　heart；　almost　caress　it。　His　heart　sped；　beating　faster。　My　heart　sped　to　catch　it；　until　our　hearts　were　beating　together；　and　it　was　hard　to　tell　where　one　pulse　stopped　and　the　other　began。　I　could　taste　his　heartbeat　in　my　mouth　as　if　it　pulsed　inside　me　already；　caressing　the　roof　of　my　mouth　as　if　I　had　already　taken　a　bite　of　him。
　I　closed　my　eyes　and　tried　to　distance　myself　from　the　ebb　and　flow　of　his　body；　his　warmth；　his　need。
　〃Jean…Claude　was　afraid　you'd　try　to　feed　on　Nathaniel。　I'm　supposed　to　keep　that　from　happening。〃　His　voice　was　breathy。
　I　raised　up；　and　Nathaniel's　arms　curled　around　my　waist；　pressing　his　face　into　my　side。　I　sat　up　beside　Jason　with　Nathaniel　like　a　tempting　weight　wrapped　around　my　body。　My　hand　stayed　on　Jason's　chest；　cupping　his　heart。　He　should　have　moved　away；　but　he　didn't。　I　could　feel　his　desire；　feel　the　need　in　him。　It　was　a　pure　desire；　not　for　power；　or　anything　else；　just　simply　for　me。　It　wasn't　love；　but　it　was　purity　of　a　sort。　He　simply　wanted　me。　I　stared　into　his　blue　eyes；　and　there　was　no　deceit；　no　agenda。　Jason　didn't　want　to　secure　his　power　base；　or　gain　mystical　energy；　he　just　wanted　to　have　sex　with　me；　to　hold　me　in　his　arms。
　I'd　always　treated　Jason　as　lesser　than　a　frie