brideshead+revisited-第14部分

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


　　　　'You're　Mr　Ryder？　Jump　in。'　Her　voice　was　Sebastian's　and　his　her；　way　of　speaking。
　　　　'How　is　he？'
　　　　'Sebastian？　Oh；　he's　fine。　Have　you　had　dinner？　Well；　I　expect　it　was　beastly。　There's　some　more　at　home。　Sebastian　and　I　are　alone；　so　we　thought　we'd　wait　for　you。'
　　　　'What's　happened　to　him？'
　　　　'Didn't　he　say？　I　expect　he　thought　you　wouldn't　e　if　you　knew。　He's　cracked　a　bone　in　his　ankle　so　small　that　it　hasn't　a　name。　But　they　X…rayed　it　yesterday；　and　told　him　to　keep　it　up　for　a　month。　It's　a　great　bore　to　him；　putting　out　all　his　plans；　he's　been　making　the　most　enormous　fuss。。。Everyone　else　has　gone。　He　tried　to　make　me　stay　back　with　him。　Well；　I　expect　you　know　how　maddeningly　pathetic　he　can　be。　I　almost　gave　in；　and　then　I　said：　〃Surely　there　must　be　someone　you　can　get　hold　of；〃　and　he　said　everybody　was　away　or　busy　and；　anyway；　no　one　else　would　do。　But　at　last　he　agreed　to　try　you；　and　I　promised　I'd　stay　if　you　failed　him；　so　you　can　imagine　how　popular　you　are　with　me。　I　must　say　it's　noble　of　you　to　e　all　this　way　at　a　moment's　notice。'　But　as　she　said　it；　I　heard；　or　thought　I　heard；　a　tiny　note　of　contempt　in　her　voice　that　I　should　be　so　readily　available。
　　　　'How　　did　he　do　it？'
　　　　'Believe　it　or　not；　playing　croquet。　He　lost　his　temper　and　tripped　over　a　hoop。　Not　a　very　honourable　scar。'
　　　　She　so　much　resembled　Sebastian　that；　sitting　beside　her　in　the　gathering　dusk；　I　was　confused　by　the　double　illusion　of　familiarity　and　strangeness。　Thus；　looking　through　strong　lenses；　one　may　watch　a　man　approaching　from　afar；　study　every　detail　of　his　face　and　clothes；　believe　one　has　only　to　put　out　a　hand　to　touch　him　marvel　that　he　does　not　hear　one　and　look　up　as　one　moves；　and　then；　seeing　him　with　the　naked　eye；　suddenly　remember　that　one　is　to　him　a　distant　speck；　doubtfully　human。　I　knew　her　and　she　did　not　know　me。　Her　dark　hair　was　scarcely　longer　than　Sebastian's；　and　it　blew　back　from　her　forehead　as　his　did；　her　eyes　on　the　darkling　road　were　his；　but　larger；　her　painted　mouth　was　less　friendly　to　the　world。　She　wore　a　bangle　of　charms　on　her　wrist　and　in　her　ears　little　gold　rings。　Her　light　coat　revealed　an　inch　or　two　of　flowered　silk；　skirts　were　short　in　those　days；　and　her　legs；　stretched　forward　to　the　controls　of　the　car；　were　spindly；　as　was　also　the　fashion。　Because　her　sex　was　the　palpable　difference　between　the　familiar　and　the　strange　it　seemed　to　fill　the　space　between　us；　so　that　I　felt　her　to　be　especially　female；　as　I　had　felt　of　no　woman　before。
　　　　'I'm　terrified　of　driving　at　this　time　of　the　evening；'　she　said。　'There　doesn't　seem　anyone　left　at　home　who　can　drive　a　car。　Sebastian　and　I　are　practically　camping　out　here。　I　hope　you　haven't　e　expecting　a　pompous　party。'　She　leaned　forward　to　the　locker　for　a　box　of　cigarettes。
　　　　'No　thanks。'
　　　　'Light　one　for　me；　will　you？'
　　　　It　was；　the　first　time　in　my　life　that　anyone　had　asked　this　of　me；　and　as　I　took　the　cigarette　from　my　lips　and　put　it　in　hers；　I　caught　a　thin　bat's　squeak　of　sexuality；　inaudible　to　any　but　me。
　　　　'Thanks。　You've　been　here　before。　Nanny　reported　it。　We　both　thought　it　very　odd　of　you　not　to　stay　to　tea　with　me。'
　　　　'That　was　Sebastian。'
　　　　'You　seem　to　let　him　boss　you　about　a　good　deal。　You　shouldn't。　It's　very　bad　for　him。'
　　　　We　had　turned　the　er　of　the　drive　now；　the　colour　had　died　in　the　woods；　and　sky；。and　the　house　seemed　painted　in　grisaille；　save　for　the　central　golden　square　at　the　open　doors。　A　man　was　waiting　to　take　my　luggage。
　　　　'Here　we　are。'
　　　　She　led　me　up　the　steps　and　into　the　hall；　flung　her　coat　on　a　marble　table；　and　stooped　to　fondle　a　dog　which　came　to　greet　her。　'I　wouldn't　put　it　past　Sebastian　to　have　started　dinner。'
　　　　At　that　moment　he　appeared　between　the　pillars　at　the　further　end；　propelling　himself　in　a　wheel…chair。　He　was　in　pyjamas　and　dressing…gown；　with　one　foot　heavily　bandaged。
　　　　'Well；　darling；　I　have　collected　your　chum；'　she　said；　again　with　a　barely　perceptible　note　of　contempt。
　　　　'I　thought　you　were　dying；'　I　said；　conscious　then；　as　I　had　been　ever　since　I　arrived；　of　the　predominating　emotion　of　vexation；　rather　than　of　relief；　that　I　had　been　bilked　of　my　expectations　of　a　grand　tragedy。
　　　　'I　thought　I　was；　too。　The　pain　was　excruciating。　Julia；　do　you　think；　if　you　asked　him；　Wilcox　would　give　us　champagne　tonight？'
　　　　'I　hate　champagne　and　Mr　Ryder　has　had　dinner。'
　　　　'Mister　Ryder？　Mister　Ryder？　Charles　drinks　champagne　at　all　hours。　Do　you　know；　seeing　this　great　swaddled　foot　of　mine；　I　can't　get　it　out　of　my　mind　that　I　have　gout；　and　that　gives　me　a　craving　for　champagne。'
　　　　We　dined　in　a　room　they　called　'the　Painted　Parlour'。　It　was　a　spacious　octagon；　later　in　design　than　the　rest　of　the　house　its　walls；　were　adorned　with　wreathed　medallions　and　across　its　dome　prim　Pompeian　figures　stood　pastoral　groups。　They　and　the　satin…wood　and　ormolu　furniture；　the　carpet；　the　hanging　bronze　candelabrum；　the　mirrors　and　sconces；　were　all　a　single　position；　the　design　of　one　illustrious　hand。　'We　usually　eat　here　when　we're　alone；'　said　Sebastian；　'it's　so　cosy。'
　　　　While　they　dined　I　ate　a　peach　and　told　them　of　the　war　with　my　father。
　　　　'He　sounds　a　perfect　poppet；'　said　Julia。　'And　now　I'm　going　to　leave　you　boys。'
　　　　'Where　are　you　off　to？'
　　　　'The　nursery。　I　promised　nanny　a　last　game　of　halma。'　She　kissed　the　top　of　Sebastian's　head。　I　opened　the　door　for　her。　'Good　Night；　Mr　Ryder；　and　good…bye。　I　don't　suppose　we'll　meet　tomorrow。　I'm　leaving　early。　I　can't　tell　you　how　grateful　I　am　to　you　for　relieving　me　at　the　sick…bed。'
　　　　'My　sister　is　very　pompous　tonight；'　said　Sebastian；　when　she　was　gone。
　　　　'I　don't　think　she　cares　for　me；'　I　said。
　　　　'I　don't　think　she　cares　for　anyone　much。　I　love　her。　She's　so　like　me。'
　　　　'Do　you？　Is　she？'
　　　　'In　looks　I　mean　and　the　way　she　talks。　I　wouldn't　love　anyone　with　a　character　like　mine。'
　　　　When　we　had　drunk　our　port；　I　walked　beside　Sebastian's　chair　through　the　pillared　hall　to　the　library；　where　we　sat　that　night　and　nearly　every　night　of　the　ensuing　month。　It　lay　on　the　side　of　the　house　that　overlooked　the　lakes；　the　windows　were　open　to　the　stars　and　the　scented　air；　to　the　indigo　and　silver；　moonlit　landscape　of　the　valley　and　the　sound　of　water　falling　in　the　fountain。
　　　　'We'll　have　a　heavenly　time　alone；'　said　Sebastian　　and　when　next　morning；　while　I　was　shaving；　I　saw　from　my　bathroom　window　Julia；　with　luggage　at　her　back；　drive　from　the　forecourt　and　disappear　at　the　hill's　crest；　without　a　backward　glance；　I　felt　a　sense　of　liberation　and　peace　such　as　I　was；　to　know　years　later　when；　after　a　night　of　unrest；　the　sirens　sounded　the　'All　Clear'。　

＇4＇

THE　languor　of　Youth　…　how　unique　and　quintessential　it　is！　How　quickly；　how　irrecoverably；　lost！　The　zest；　the　generous　affections；　the　illusions；　the　despair；　all　the　traditional　attributes　of　Youth　…　all　save　this　…　e　and　go　with　us　through　life。　These　things　are　a　part　of　life　itself；　but　languor　…　the　relaxation　of　yet　unwearied　sinews；　the　mind　sequestered　and　self…regarding　that　belongs　to　Youth　alone　and　dies　with　it。　Perhaps　in　the　mansions　of　Limbo　the　heroes　enjoy　some　such　pensation　for　their　loss　of　the　Beatific　Vision；　perhaps　the　Beatific　Vision　itself　has　some　remote　kinship　with　this　lowly　experience；　I；　at　any　rate；　believed　myself　very　near　heaven；　during　those　languid　days　at　Brideshead。

　　　　'Why　is　this　house　called　a　〃Castle〃？'
　　　　'It　used　to　be　one　until　they　moved　it。'
　　　　'What　can　you　mean？'
　　　　'Just　that。　We　had　a　castle　a　mile　away；　down　by　the　village。　Then　we　took　a　fancy　to　the　valley　and。　pulled　the　castle　down；　carted　the　stones　up　here；　and　built　a　new　house。　I'm　glad　they　did；　aren't　you？'
　　　　'If　it　was　mine　I'd　never　live　anywhere　else。'
　　　　'But　you　sec。　Charles；　it　isn't　mine。　Just　at　the　moment　it　is；　but　usually　it's　full　of　ravening　beasts。　If　it　could　only　be　like　this　always　…　always　summer；　always　alone；　the　fruit　always　ripe；　and　Aloysius　in　a　good　temper。。。'
　　　　It　is　thus　I　like　to　remember　Sebastian；　as　he　was　that　summer；　when　we　wandered　alone　together　through　that　enchanted　palace；　Sebastian　in　his　wheel　chair　spinning　down　the　box…edged　walks　of　the　kitchen　gardens　in　search　of　alpine　strawberries　and　warm　figs；　propelling　himself　through　the　succession　of　hothouses；　from　scent　to　scent　and　climate　to　climate；　to　cut　the　muscat　grapes　and　choose　orchids　for　our　button…holes；　Sebastian　hobbling　with　a　pantomime　of　difficulty　to　the　old　nurseries；　sitting　beside　me　on　the　threadbare；　flowered　carpet　with　the　toy…cupboard　empty　about　us　and　Nanny　Hawkins　stitching　placently　in　the　er；　saying；　'You're　one　as　bad　as　the　other；　a　pair　of　children　the　two　of　you。　Is　that　what　they　teach　you　at　College？'　Sebastian　supine　on　the　sunny　seat　in　the　colonnade；　as　he　was　now；　and　I　in　a　hard　chair　beside　him；　trying　to　draw　the　fountain。
　　　　'Is　the　dome　by　Inigo　Jones；　too？　It　looks　later。'
　　　　'Oh；　Charles；　don't　be　such　a　tourist。　What　does　it　matter　when　it　was　built　if　it's　pretty？'
　　　　'It's　the　sort　of　thing　I　like　to　know。'
　　　　'Oh　dear；　I　thought　I'd　cured　you　of　all　that　…　the　terrible　Mr　Collins。'
　　　　It　was　an　aesthetic　education　to　live　within　those　walls；　to　wander　from　room　to　room；　from　the　Soanesque　library　to　the　Chinese　drawing；　adazzle　with　gilt　pagodas　and　nodding　mandarins；　painted　paper　and　Chippendale　fretwork；　from　the　Pompeian　parlour　to　the　great　tapestry…hung　hall　which　stood　unchanged；　as　it　had　been　designed　two　hundred　and　fifty　years　before；　to　sit；　hour　after　hour；　in　the　shade　looking　out　on　the　terrace。
　　　　This　terrace　was　the　final　consummation　of　the　house's　plan；　it　stood　on　massive　stone　ramparts　above　the　lakes；　so　that　from　the　hall　steps　it　seemed　to　overhang　them；　as　though；　standing　by　the　balustrade；　one　could　have　dropped　a　pebble　into　the　first　of　them　immediately　below　one's　feet。　It　was　embraced　by　the　two　arms　of　the　colonnade；　beyond　the　pavilions　groves　of　lime　led　to　the　wooded　hillsides。　Part　of　the　terrace　was　paved；　part　planted　with　flower…beds　and　arabesques　of　dwarf　box；　taller　box　grew　in　a　dense　hedge；　making　a　wide　oval；　cut　into　niches　and　interspersed　wi