time enough for love-时间足够你爱(英文版)-第19部分

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　that　certificates　were　kept　ready　and　waiting　for　each　nev　group　of　still…damp　ifiers。
　　
　　From　then　on　he　was　letter…perfect　in　following　orders　01　landing　signal　officers；　obeying　like　a　robot；　emotions　and　judg　meat　suppressed　by　a　sort　of　autohypnosis。　When　it　came　tim　to　qualify　in　night　landings…much　worse　on　the　nerves　a　the　pilot　in　the　air　couldn't　see　anything　but　lighted　wands　th　LSO　waves　instead　of　flags…David　landed　perfectly　on　hi　first　approach。
　　
　　David　kept　his　mouth　shut　about　his　determination　not　t　seek　glory　as　a　fighter　pilot　until　he　pleted　all　requirement~　to　make　permanent　his　flying　status。　Then　he　put　in　a　requesi　for　advanced　training…in　multiple…engine　aircraft。　This　ww　embarrassing；　as　his　instructor　who　thought　so　well　of　his　po　tential　ander　and　it　was　necessar~　to　submit　this　request　through　；him。　Once　the　letter　startec　through　the　mill；　he　was　called　to　his　boss's　stateroom。
　　
　　〃Dave；　what　is　this？〃
　　
　　〃Just　what　it　says；　sir。　I　want　to　learn　to　fly　the　big　ones。'
　　
　　〃Are…　you　out　of　your　head？　You're　a　fighter　pilot。　Threc　months　of　this　scouting　squadron…one…quarter；　so　I　can　givc　you　a　good　Fitness　Report…and　you　do　indeed　leave　for　ad　vanced　training。　As　a　fighter。〃
　　
　　David　didn't　answer。　…
　　
　　His　squadron　mander　persisted。　〃Dave；　are　you　frettinl　over　that　silly　'Diaper　Diploma'？　Half　the　pilots　in　the　fleel　have　won　it。　Hell；　man；　I've　got　one　myself。　It　didn't　hurt　yot　with　your　shipmates；　it　just　made　you　look　human　when　yo~　were　beginning　to　suffer　from　too　tight　a　halo。〃
　　
　　David　still　did　not　ment。
　　
　　〃Damn　it；　don't　just　stand　there！　Take　this　letter　and　teal　it　up。　Then　submit　one　for　fighter　training。　I'll　let　you　go　now；　instead　of　waiting　three　months。〃
　　
　　Dave　stood　mute。　His　boss　looked　at　him　and　jurned　red。　then　said　softly；　〃Maybe　I　was　wrong。　Maybe　you　don'~　have　what　it　takes　to　be　a　fighter…Mister　Lamb。　That's　all。　Dismissed。〃
　　
　　In　the　〃big　ones；〃　the　multiple…engine　flying　boats；　David　at　last　found　his　home。　They　were　too　big　to　fly　from　a　carrier　at　sea；　instead　duty　with　them　counted　as　sea　duty；　although　in　fact　David　almost　always　slept　at　home…his　own　bed；　his　own　wife…save　for　an　occasional　night　as　duty　officer　when　he　slept　at　the　base；　and　still　less　frequent　occasions　when　the　big　boats　flew　at　night。　But　they　did　not　fly　too　often　even　in　daylight　and　fine　weather；　they　were　expensive　to　fly；　too　expensive　to　risk；　and　the　country　was　going　through　an　economy　wave。　They　flew　with　full　crews…four　or　five　for　two…engine　boats；　more　for　four…engine　boats；　and　often　with　passengers　to　permit　people　to　get　flying　time　to　qualify　for　that　extra　pay。　All　of　this　suited　Dave…no　more　nonsense　of　trying　to　navigate　while　doing　sixteen　other　things；　no　more　relying　on　the　judgment　of　a　landing　signal　officer；　no　more　depending　on　just　one　neurotic　engine；　no　more　worries　about　running　out　of　gas。　True；　given　a　choice；　he　would　always　make　every　landing　himself…but　when　he　was　ranked　out　of　this　by　a　senior　pilot；　he　did　not　let　his　worry　show　and　in　time　ceased　to　worry；　as　all　big…boat　pioth　w？re　careful　and　disposed　to　live　a　long　time。
　　
　　（Omitted）
　　
　　…years　David　spent　fortably　while　being　promoted　two　ranks。
　　
　　Then　war　broke　out。　There　were　always　wars　that　century
　　
　　…but　not　always　everywhere。　This　one　included　practically　every　nation　on　Earth。　David　took　a　dim　view　of　war；　in　his　opinion　the　purpose　of　a　navy　was　to　appear　so　fierce　as　to　make　it　unnecessary　to　fight。　But　he　was　not　asked；　and　it　was　too　late　to　worry；　too　late　to　resign；　nor　was　there　anywhere　to　run。　So　he　did　not　worry　about　what　he　could　not　help；　which　was　good；　as　the　war　was　long；　bitter；　and　involved　millions　ol　deaths。
　　
　　〃Grandfather　Lazarus；　what　did　you　do　during　this　war？〃　Me？　I　sold　Liberty　Bonds　and　made　four…minute　speeches　and　served　both　on　a　draft　board　and　a　rationing　board　and　made　other　valuable　contributions…until　the　President　called　me　to　Washington；　and　what　I　did　then　was　hush…hush　and　you　wouldn't　believe　it　if　I　told　you。　None　of　your　lip；　boy；　I　was　telling　you　what　David　did。
　　
　　0！'　David　was　an　authentic　hero。　He　was　cited　for　gallantry　and　awarded　a　decoration；　one　that　figures　into　the　rest　of　his　story。
　　
　　Dave　had　resigned　himself　to…or　looked　forward　to；　as　ma~
　　
　　be…retiring　at　the　rank　of　lieutenant　mander；　as　there　weren't　many　billets　higher　than　that　in　the　flying　boats。　But　the　war　jumped　him　to　lieutenant　mander　in　a　matter　of　weeks；　then　to　mander　a　year　later；　and　finally　to　captain；　four　wide　gold　stripes；　without　facing　a　selection　board；　taking　a　promotion　examination；　or　manding　a　vessel。　The　war　was　using　them　up　fast；　and　anyone　not　killed　was　promoted　as　long　as　he　kept　his　nose　clean。
　　
　　Dave's　nose　was　clean。　He　spent　part　of　the　war　patrolling　his　country's　coasts　for　enemy　underwater　vessels…〃cornbat　duty〃　by　definition　but　hardly　more　dangerous　than　peacetline　practice。　He　also　spent　a　tour　turning　clerks　and　salesmen　into　fliers。　He　had　one　assignment　into　a　zone　where　actual　fighting　was　going　on；　and　there　he　won　his　medal。　I　don't　know　the　details；　but　〃heroism〃　often　consists　in　keeping　your　head　in　an　emergency　and　doing　the　best　you　can　with　what　you　have　instead　of　panicking　and　being　shot　in　the　tail。　People　who　fight　this　way　win　more　battles　than　do　intentional　heroes；　a　glory　hound　often　throws　away　the　lives　of　his　mates　as　well　as　his　own。
　　
　　But　to　be　officially　a　hero　requires　luck；　too。　It　is　not　enough　to　do　your　job　under　fire　exceptionally　well；　it　is　necessary　that　someone…as　senior　as　possible…see　what　you　do　and　write　it　up。　Dave　had　that　bit　of　luck　and　got　his　medal。
　　
　　He　finished　the　war　in　his　nation's　capital；　in　the　Naval　Bureau　of　Aeronautics；　in　charge　of　development　of　patrol　planes。　Perhaps　he　did　more　good　there　than　he　did　in　bat；　since　he　knew　those　multiple…engine　craft　as　well　as　any　man　alive；　and　this　job　put　him　in　position　to　cut　out　obsolete　nonsense　and　push　through　some　improvements。　As　may　be；　he　finished　the　war　at　a　desk；　shuffling　papers　and　sleeping　at　home。
　　
　　Then　the　war　ended。
　　
　　Dave　looked　around　and　sized　up　the　prospects。　There　were　hundreds　of　Navy　captains　who；　like　himself；　had　been　lieutenants　only　three　years　earlier。　Since　the　peace　was　〃forever；〃　as　politicians　always　insist；　few　would　ever　be　promoted。　Dave　could　see　that　he　would　not　be　promoted；　he　had　neither　the　seniority；　the　traditionally　approved　pattern　of　service；　nor　the　right　connections；　political　and　social。
　　
　　What　he　did　have　was　almost　twenty　years'　service；　the　minimum　on　which　to　retire　at　half　pay。　Or　he　could　hang　on　until　he　was　forced　to　retire　through　failure　to　be　selected　for　admiral。
　　
　　There　was　no　need　to　decide　at　once；　twenty…year　retirement　was　a　year　or　two　off。
　　
　　But　he　did　retire　almost　at　once…for　medical　reasons。　The　diagnosis　was　〃psychosis　situational；〃　meaning　that　he　went　crazy　on　the　job。
　　
　　Ira；　I　don't　know　how　to　evaluate　this。　Dave　impressed　me　as　one　of　the　few　pletely　sane　men　I　ever　knew。　But　I　wasn't　there　when　he　retired；　and　〃psychosis　situational〃　was　the　second　monest　cause　for　medical　retirement　of　n？…va！　officers　in　thoSe　days　but…how　could　they　tell？　Being　crazy　was　no　handicap　to　a　naval　officer；　any　more　than　it　was　to　an　author；　a　schoolteacher；　a　preacher；　or　several　other　esteemed　occupations。　As　long　as　Dave　showed　up　on　time　and　signed　paper　work　some　clerk　prepared　and　never　talked　back　to　his　seniors；　it　would　never　show。　I　recall　one　naval　officer　who　had　an　amazing　collection　of　ladies'　garters；　he　used　to　lock　himself　into　his　stateroom　and　examine　them…and　another　one　who　did　exactly　the　same　with　a　collection　of　paper　stickers　used　for　postage。　Which　one　was　crazy？　Or　both？　Or　neither？
　　
　　Another　aspect　of　Dave's　retirement　requires　knowledge　of　the　laws　of　the　time。　Retiring　on　twenty　years'　service　paid　half　pay…subject　to　ine　tax　which　was　heavy。　Retiring　for　medical　disability　paid　three…quarters　pay　and　was　not　subject　to　ine　tax。
　　
　　I　don't　know；　I　just　don't　know。　But　the　whole　matter　fits　Dave's　talent　for　maximum　results　with　minimum　effort。　Let's　stipulate　that　he　was　crazy…but　was　he　crazy　like　a　fox？
　　
　　There　were　other　features　of　his　retirement。　He　judged　correctly　that　he　had　no　chance　of　being　selected　for　admiral…but　that　citation　for　gallantry　carried　with　it　an　honorary　promotion　on　retirement…so　Dave　wound　up　the　first　man　in　his　class　to　bee　admiral；　without　ever　manding　a　ship　much　less　a　fleet…one　of　the　youngest　admirals　in　history；　by　his　true　age。　I　conjecture　that　this　amused　the　farm　boy　who　hated　to　plow　behind　a　mule。
　　
　　For　at　heart　he　was　still　a　farm　boy。　There　was　another　law　for　the　benefit　of　veterans　of　that　war；　one　intended　to　pensate　lads　who　had　had　their　educations　interrupted　by　having　to　leave　home　to　fight：　subsidized　education；　one　month　for　every　month　of　wartime　service。
　　
　　This　was　intended　for　young　conscripts；　but　there　was　nothing　to　keep　a　career　officer　from　taking　advantage　of　it；　Dave　could　claim　it　and　did。　With　three…quarters　pay　not　subject　to　taxation；　with　the　subsidy…also　not　taxable…of　a　married
　　
　　veteran　going　to　school；　Dave　had　about　the　ine　he　had　had　on　active　duty。　More；　really；　as　he　no　longer　had　to　buy　pretty　uniforms　or　keep　up　expensive　social　obligations。　He　could　loaf　and　read　books；　dress　as　he　pleased；　and　not　worry　about　appearances。　Sometimes　he　would　stay　up　late　and　prove　that　there　were　more　optimists　playing　poker　than　mathematicians。　Then　sleep　late。　For　he　never；　never　got　up　early。
　　
　　Nor　did　he　ever　again　go　up　in　an　aeroplane。　Dave　had　never　trusted　flying…machines；　they　were　much　too　high　in　case　they　stalled。　They　had　never　been　anything　to　him　but　a　means　to　avoid　something　worse；　once　they　had　served　his　purpose；　he　put　them　aside　as　firmly　as　he　had　put　aside　fencing　foils…and　with　no　regrets　in　either　case。
　　
　　Soon　he　had　another　diploma；　one　which　stated　that　he　was　a　Bachelor…　of　Sc