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new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版)-第28部分

小说: new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版) 字数: 每页4000字

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He chuckled again; as a flagpole speared another man into a concrete wall。 
After that; I really watched the show; laughing with him as the mayhem got 
more and more ridiculous。 
How was I ever going to fight the blurring lines in our relationship when I 
enjoyed being with him so 
much? 
Both Jacob and Mike had claimed the armrests on either side of me。 Both of 
their hands rested lightly; 
palms up; in an unnatural looking position。 Like steel bear traps; open and 
ready。 Jacob was in the habit 
of taking my hand whenever the opportunity presented itself; but here in the 
darkened movie theater; with 
Mike watching; it would have a different significance—and I was sure he knew 
that。 I couldn't believe 
that Mike was thinking the same thing; but his hand was placed exactly like 
Jacob's。 
I folded my arms tightly across my chest and hoped that both their hands fell 
asleep。 
Mike gave up first。 About halfway through the movie; he pulled his arm back; 
and leaned forward to put 
his head in his hands。 At first I thought he was reacting to something on the 
screen; but then he moaned。 
〃Mike; are you okay?〃 I whispered。 
The couple in front of us turned to look at him as he groaned again。 
I could see the sheen of sweat across his face in the light from the screen。 
Mike groaned again; and bolted for the door。 I got up to follow him; and Jacob 
copied me immediately。 
〃No; stay;〃 I whispered。 〃I'll make sure he's okay。〃 
Jacob came with me anyway。 
〃You don't have to e。 Get your eight bucks worth of carnage;〃 I insisted as 
we walked up the aisle。 
〃That's okay。 You sure can pick them; Bella。 This movie really sucks。〃 His 
voice rose from a whisper to 
its normal pitch as we walked out of the theater。 
There was no sign of Mike in the hallway; and I was glad then that Jacob had 
e with me—he ducked 
into the men's bathroom to check for him there。 
Jacob was back in a few seconds。 
〃Oh; he's in there; all right;〃 he said; rolling his eyes。 〃What a 
marshmallow。 You should hold out for 
someone with a stronger stomach。 Someone who laughs at the gore that makes 
weaker men vomit。〃 
〃I'll keep my eyes open for someone like that。〃 
We were all alone in the hallway。 Both theaters were halfway through the 
movie; and it was 
deserted—quiet enough for us to hear the popcorn popping at the concession 
counter in the lobby。 
Jacob went to sit on the velveteen…upholstered bench against the wall; patting 
the space beside him。 
〃He sounded like he was going to be in there for a while;〃 he said; stretching 
his long legs out in front of 
him as he settled in to wait。 
I joined him with a sigh。 He looked like he was thinking about blurring more 
lines。 Sure enough; as soon 
as I sat down; he shifted over to put his arm around my shoulders。 
〃Jake;〃 I protested; leaning away。 He dropped his arm; not looking bothered at 
all by the minor rejection。 
He reached out and took my hand firmly; wrapping his other hand around my 
wrist when I tried to pull 
away again。 Where did he get the confidence from? 
〃Now; just hold on a minute; Bella;〃 he said in a calm voice。 〃Tell me 
something。〃 
I grimaced。 I didn't want to do this。 Not just not now; but not ever。 There 
was nothing lett in my life at 
this point that was more important than Jacob Black。 But he seemed determined 
to ruin everything。 
〃What?〃 I muttered sourly。 
〃You like me; right?〃 
〃You know I do。〃 
〃Better than that joker puking his guts out in there?〃 He gestured toward the 
bathroom door。 
〃Yes;〃 I sighed。 
〃Better than any of the other guys you know?〃 He was calm; serene—as if my 
answer didn't matter; or 
he already knew what it was。 
〃Better than the girls; too;〃 I pointed out。 
〃But that's all;〃 he said; and it wasn't a question。 
It was hard to answer; to say the word。 Would he get hurt and avoid me? How 
would I stand that? 
〃Yes;〃 I whispered。 
He grinned down at me。 〃That's okay; you know。 As long as you like me the 
best。 And you think I'm 
good…looking—sort of。 I'm prepared to be annoyingly persistent。〃 
〃I'm not going to change;〃 I said; and though I tried to keep my voice normal; 
I could hear the sadness in 
it。 
His face was thoughtful; no longer teasing。 〃It's still the other one; isn't 
it?〃 
I cringed。 Funny how he seemed to know not to say the name—just like before 
in the car with the music。 
He picked up on so much about me that I never said。 
〃You don't have to talk about it;〃 he told me。 
I nodded; grateful。 
〃But don't get mad at me for hanging around; okay?〃 Jacob patted the back of 
my hand。 〃Because I'm 
not giving up。 I've got loads of time。〃 
I sighed。 〃You shouldn't waste it on me;〃 I said; though I wanted him to。 
Especially if he was willing to 
accept me the way I was—damaged goods; as is。 
〃It's what I want to do; as long as you still like to be with me。〃 
〃I can't imagine how I could not like being with you;〃 I told him honestly。 
Jacob beamed。 〃I can live with that。〃 
〃Just don't expect more;〃 I warned him; trying to pull my hand away。 He held 
onto it obstinately。 
〃This doesn't really bother you; does it?〃 he demanded; squeezing my fingers。 
〃No;〃 I sighed。 Truthfully; it felt nice。 His hand was so much warmer than 
mine; I always felt too cold 
these days。 
〃And you don't care what he thinks。〃 Jacob jerked his thumb toward the 
bathroom。 
〃I guess not。〃 
〃So what's the problem?〃 
〃The problem;〃 I said; 〃is; that it means something different to me than it 
does to you。〃 
〃Well。〃 He tightened his hand around mine 〃That's my problem; isn't it?〃 
〃Fine;〃 I grumbled。 〃Don't forget it; though。〃 
〃I won't。 The pin's out of the grenade for me; now; eh?〃 He poked me in the 
ribs。 
I rolled my eyes。 I guess if he felt like making a joke out of it; he was 
entitled。 
He chuckled quietly for a minute while his pinky finger absently traced 
designs against the side of my 
hand。 
〃That's a funny scar you've got there;〃 he suddenly said; twisting my hand to 
examine it。 〃How did that 
happen?〃 
The index finger of his free hand followed the line of the long silvery 
crescent that was barely visible 
against my pale skin。 
I scowled。 〃Do you honestly expect me to remember where all my scars e 
from?〃 
I waited for the memory to hit—to open the gaping hole。 But; as it so often 
did; Jacob's presence kept 
me whole。 
〃It's cold;〃 he murmured; pressing lightly against the place where James had 
cut me with his teeth。 
And then Mike stumbled out of the bathroom; his face ashen and covered in 
sweat。 He looked horrible。 
〃Oh; Mike;〃 I gasped。 
〃Do you mind leaving early?〃 he whispered。 
〃No; of course not。〃 I pulled my hand free and went to help Mike walk。 He 
looked unsteady。 
〃Movie too much for you?〃 Jacob asked heartlessly。 
Mike's glare was malevolent。 〃I didn't actually see any of it;〃 he mumbled。 〃I 
was nauseated before the 
lights went down。〃 
〃Why didn't you say something?〃 I scolded as we staggered toward the exit。 
〃I was hoping it would pass;〃 he said。 
〃Just a sec;〃 Jacob said as we reached the door。 He walked quickly back to the 
concession stand。 
〃Could I have an empty popcorn bucket?〃 he asked the salesgirl。 She looked at 
Mike once; and then 
thrust a bucket at Jacob。 
〃Get him outside; please;〃 she begged。 She was obviously the one who would 
have to clean the floor。 
I towed Mike out into the cool; wet air。 He inhaled deeply。 Jacob was right 
behind us。 He helped me get 
Mike into the back of the car; and handed him the bucket with a serious gaze。 
〃Please;〃 was all Jacob said。 
We rolled down the windows; letting the icy night air blow through the car; 
hoping it would help Mike。 I 
curled my arms around my legs to keep warm。 
〃Cold; again?〃 Jacob asked; putting his arm around me before I could answer。 
〃You're not?〃 
He shook his head。 
〃You must have a fever or something;〃 I grumbled。 It was freezing。 I touched 
my fingers to his forehead; 
and his head was hot。 
〃Whoa; Jake—you're burning up!〃 
〃I feel fine。〃 He shrugged。 〃Fit as a fiddle。〃 
I frowned and touched his head again。 His skin blazed under my fingers。 
〃Your hands are like ice;〃 he plained。 
〃Maybe it's me;〃 I allowed。 
Mike groaned in the backseat; and threw up in the bucket。 I grimaced; hoping 
my own stomach could 
stand the sound and smell。 Jacob checked anxiously over his shoulder to make 
sure his car wasn't 
defiled。 
The road felt longer on the way back。 
Jacob was quiet; thoughtful。 He left his arm around me; and it was so warm 
that the cold wind felt good。 
I stared out the windshield; consumed with guilt。 
It was so wrong to encourage Jacob。 Pure selfishness。 It didn't matter that 
I'd tried to make my position 
clear。 If he felt any hope at all that this could turn into something other 
than friendship; then I hadn't been 
clear enough。 
How could I explain so that he would understand? I was an empty shell。 Like a 
vacant 
house—condemned—for months I'd been utterly uninhabitable。 Now I was a 
little improved。 The front 
room was in better repair。 But that was all—just the one small piece。 He 
deserved better than 
that—better than a one…room; falling…down fixer…upper。 No amount of 
investment on his part could put 
me back in working order。 
Yet I knew that I wouldn't send him away; regardless。 I needed him too much; 
and I was selfish。 Maybe 
I could make my side more clear; so that he would know to leave me。 The 
thought made me shudder; 
and Jacob tightened his arm around me。 
I drove Mike home in his Suburban; while Jacob followed behind us to take me 
home。 Jacob was quiet 
all the way back to my house; and I wondered if he were thinking the same 
things that I was。 Maybe he 
was changing his mind。 
〃I would invite myself in; since we're early;〃 he said as we pulled up next to 
my truck。 〃But I think you 
might be right about the fever。 I'm starting to feel a little strange。〃 
〃Oh no; not you; too! Do you want me to drive you home?〃 
〃No。〃 He shook his head; his eyebrows pulling together。 〃I don't feel sick 
yet。 Just wrong。 If I have to; 
I'll pull over。〃 
〃Will you call me as soon as you get in?〃 I asked anxiously。 
〃Sure; sure。〃 He frowned; staring ahe

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